Saturday, May 30, 2009

The Stanley Cup Finallys!!!

It's always been a kind of anomaly. Once the puck drops on the most important tournament in hockey, the Stanley Cup Finals, 98.4% of the hockey world, including hockey-mad Montreal, has stopped giving a shit.

But there are plenty of reasons to give a shit even if this series feels like it's being played 12 years after the season started, in the middle of a small village in Peru.

Finally, Sidney Crosby.

We get to see two more weeks of one of the best individual runs ever. Runs that would make the ones I had in Mexico a while back envious. Maybe the Kid lifts the Cup at the end of this, far earlier than we had all expected.

It's about time, Gino Malkin.

He responded beautifully to critics who had labelled him a dud in the early stages of the Washington series. The Art Ross Trophy winner is playing with so much pizzaz I'm giving him the Diana Ross Trophy too.

What took you so long, Back to Back Finalists...

This hasn't happened since the Oilers exacted revenge on the Islanders in 1984, foiling NYI's attempt to share bragging rights the Rocket's Habs, and saving Montrealers from sharing anything related in History with Long Island.

Do you know how long we've been waiting for you Detroit, you repeat Champion?

Last time a city enjoyed back to back parades was in 98 when the Wings delivered two successive titles to Motor City. I'm thinking that morale must be low in Detroit these days, you know with the collapsing economy and shit, and the fact that people seem to favor riding around in hot air balloons over a fucking Chrysler.  So maybe Detroit deserves another Cup. Fuck that, Jules Verne rules.

I absolutely love the fact that Montreal is still eliminated

Stay where you are you dreadful Habs, don't move. I love you best when you're not in a hockey arena on skates. How bad is the press in Montreal that throws about 1554785506960 journalists to cover a team practice, that they all get scooped by a paper in fucking Bhbdhbfkjjngfnfgmgninsky!!!!!! Is Saks out? Probably. Is Kovy worth 7M? I think Kovy should be paid what Shia Lebeouf was paid for his staring role in Disturbia. 

Datsyuk and Lidstrom Out? Can Chelly hold the Cup over his head?

If this is to be the fantastic rematch we're all waiting for, then we want all guns firing. Can the Wings overcome a Datsyuk-Lidstrom-less lineup? Could the Habs overcome A Markov-Schneider-less lineup? Oh, yes, that team had no character, or courage (not you Saku, yes you everyone else). The Wings looked splendid (notice how often Red Fisher uses that word?) without its stars, with others coming up huge in the absence of 2 enormous talents. It barely showed.

Do you feel Osgood as Fleury does right now?  

Interesting that this final is the first in recent memory to not feature a superstar goalie, although both have been outstanding in these playoffs. Osgood's ability to morph into Georges Vezina borders on weird. Fleury looks like he's caught the comet that rides him to stardom (please make love to your significant others here, because that last sentence was my literary equivalent to a smooth and silky Mariah Carey ballad). Expect both goalies to shine here, but expect lots of goals and a series that may look a tad, though not as wide open as the Caps-Pens epic.

And Finally, when all is said and done?

A really good team will have won the Stanley Cup, making hockey, this wonderful, magical game, the real winner (that's for people that want more sex, go ahead)

It's the Stanley Cup Finals Weekend Open Thread of Love

'Sup? OK, so the actual hockey analysis never happened yesterday. Our bad. All you need to know about the Finals is that Maggie the Monkey picked the Pens. Of course, Maggie has a solid 0-5 record in picking the Finals winner. That may be why this is the last year of Maggie. If you want an actual preview, Puck Daddy is a good place to start. He makes a compelling case for the Wings winning.

Fuck compelling cases. I hate the Wings. I hate the Pens too, but I may die of boredom if the Wings win again. The only real rooting interest I have here is seeing Marian Hossa get fucked. That would be fun. Other story lines to follow include the health of Datsyuk and Lidstrom, Osgood's goaltending, and an actual breathing, living Malkin this year. Oh, I guess Sid bears watching.

So sit back and enjoy the ridiculous NBC-mandated hockey schedule this weekend - Game 1 tonight at 8 PM, Game 2 tomorrow at TBD. I really haven't stopped laughing at that TBD thing for two days now. This league is pathetic. Of course, anything goes in TWOTOL - talk LeBron in Game 6, the French Open, sex, politics, whatever. We leave you with two videos. First is the last two ESPN hockey experts previewing the finals, and second is a video of two blondes kissing. For no reason whatsoever. Hey, it's the Finals.

Friday, May 29, 2009

Tits are in the clear

While we wait for the big Finals preview, here's a little tidbit for you. RDS is reporting that the Montreal cops have gone through all the phone conversations (BURN THE TAPES), and Big Tits, Little Tits, and The Hamr will not be charged with any criminal wrongdoing stemming from their association with "alleged" mobster and drug dealer Pasquale Mangiola. Whew, I guess.

The Tits brothers could not be reached for comment, as they were last seen getting out of a Bentley and going into a bar with a bevy of hot chicks.

The Morning Skate is psyched for the weekend for Friday, May 29th

Bullet points for what you missed while having nightmares of suspicious packages in the Métro...
  • La Presse seems to think it has an exclusive when it says Gainey can't hire a coach or sign some of our FA's until the ownership situation is straightened out. Like that's news;
  • TSN has their off-season plan for the Habs all set out. Hint: it includes signing players. The full FA list is in there, and while we've all talked about it, actually seeing the list is pretty scary.
Hey, did you know the Finals start this weekend? No, we swear it's true. As a result, we are possibly suspending Sexy Friday so it can be replaced by actual hockey analysis. We've got rumours one of the HF's is working on a Finals preview. Hockey analysis??? We'll believe it when we see it.

Thursday, May 28, 2009

The Morning Skate is pretty annoyed with his boyhood idol for Thursday, May 28th

Allo allo! Well, the Conference Finals are over before they began. Yeesh. At least there was somewhat of an exciting ending, with the Wings winning in OT. But man, overall those Conference finals just killed the momentum of a great Playoffs. People were saying the NHL Playoffs were better than the NBA Playoffs. Not so much anymore. Anyway, we've got the Wings-Pens rematch the NHL must be happy with. For us, we're down with MYFO's LeNoceur. Not so much blech, though, but yawn.

Alright then, on to Mr. Lafleur. Lap dance to LG77 for throwing the tip our way that Guy is appealing his guilty verdict. We don't have that much of a problem with this. We are a lawyer after all, and that's the way it goes. But when it comes to dissing the captain, STFU Guy. "It's time he go play with his brother in Minnesota"??? Give us a break. We may have 29 in our moniker, but growing up it was all about Guy. The flowing blond hair streaking down the wing is burned in our memories. Now he's just pissing us off. As moeman said in the comments yesterday, he needs some class lessons from Béliveau on how to be a great ex-player.

A Video for Mom
Mom of TMS was pretty peeved at having missed our performance on CBC's Daybreak last week. So we tracked down the audio for her. It was pretty easy. Just find, download, unzip, and install a program to download CBC's 1999 Real Player technology file; find, download, unzip, and install an audio converter to make an mp3; realize Blogger doesn't like embedding audio, make a video with Windows Media Player; create a FHF YouTube account and channel; upload the vid, and embed. Good thing we still haven't got that life yet.

Our crappiest performance on Daybreak by far. We were given 20 minutes notice on a stupid topic we knew nothing about. And without the decent questioning of regular and soon to be departing host Mike Finnerty, we resorted to the ridiculous phrase "shall we say" at least three times, and the verbal tic "you know" at least three thousand. Enjoy.

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

St. Patrick now clear to coach Nos Habitants

The face of our next coach

Lap dance to fezworth for pointing us to the fact that Patrick Roy has refused Colorado's coaching offer which he said a couple of days ago they never actually made. He says he wants to spend more time with his family and continue to coach the QMJHL Ramparts and enter the WBC as a middleweight under the name "Paddy the Kid."

Of course, we all know he's holding out for the big prize - telling the Habs to fuck off.

The Morning Skate for Wednesday, May 27th

Bullet points for what you missed while dreaming of winning in OT...
Wings look to end the Conference finals tonight.

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Really crappy beer makers seek full Habs ownership

Just too many fucking posts today.

So it looks like Habs minority owners Molson Coors want in on the hot Habs buying action. Geoffrey Molson sent out a press release today that says Molson Coors want to put in an offer.

You know, for a team that is still not officially for sale, the price keeps going up by 50 million every week.

Many lap dances to FHF legend moeman for mentioning this first

More rumours from the Motherland - Kovy offered a deal and the "C"?

Well, it's from Russia, so take it with a grain of salt. Russian reports have Bob offering Kovy a one year deal for "near 6-7.5 million", and he'll throw in the captaincy for good measure. Here's a translation of the Russian report. Who knows if it's accurate - it refers to Bob as "Bob Haine." Maybe FHF regular Sleza can help.

If it's true, I, uh, hmmm. I love Kovy and want him to stay, but for 6-7 mill? And I miss Saku already.

Lap dance to Mirtle at From the Rink for the story

Fedorov returning to the Motherland, leaving alleged ex-wives behind

Lap dance to Sean Leahy over at Puck Daddy for digging through the Russian news to find that Sergei Federov will sign a contract with Metallurg Magnitogorsk of the Kontinental Hockey League. Metallurg Magnitogorsk may be my favourite team name ever. Team logo - metal horns.

Federov leaves as the leading Russian scorer ever in the NHL. Pretty impressive for a guy who also won Selke trophies. But to me he'll always be the dude who banged and possibly married Anna Kournikova.

You really have to appreciate the irony of a guy who defected from Russia going back because he can make more money there now.

The Morning Skate for Tuesday, May 26th

Bullet points for what you missed while having nightmares about North Korea...
Pens look to put the Whalers out of their misery tonight.

Monday, May 25, 2009

The Morning Skate for Monday, May 25th

Bullet points for what you missed while wondering where the fuck we were all weekend...
No hockey tonight. The television season is over. This is our night to try to get a life.

Friday, May 22, 2009

Sexy Friday would like to have a word with the Atlanta Thrashers organization

Two Blue Crew hopefuls chat while they wait to see if they made the squad. We feel your pain, ladies.

I could not be more indifferent to the Atlanta Thrashers as a hockey team. Whenever the Habs play them, I'm like, sure, Kovalchuk is fun to watch, but whatevs. But I do love the Thrashers commitment to putting hot chicks on skates.

So where is that commitment now, Thrash? You promised me that you would "add galleries leading up to the unveiling of the 2009-10 squad at the end of the week." No galleries have been added. And now it's the end of the week, so where's my fucking unveiling??? Nothing! Sexy Friday was planned around the unveiling of the team. Now we've got nothing. Boooooo, Thrashers. Now you've made me hate you.

To make it up to Sexy Friday, here's a blonde chick previewing the Conference Finals (posted yesterday - timely!). Her analysis of M-A Fleury is eerily accurate:

Lap dance to With Leather. Sexy Friday as always copyright KSK

The Morning Skate for Friday, May 22nd

Bullet points for what you missed while having nightmares of being Ryan Leaf...
  • So I was reading somewhere yesterday how Cam Ward and M-A Fleury need to be considered among the young elite goalies of the NHL. Well, not so much anymore. Malkin comes alive, scores a hat trick in the Pens' 7-4 win over the Whalers. Malkin's 3rd goal was especially cute;
  • Wild decide against a MONSTER, choose Pens Asst. GM Chuck Fletcher as their next GM;
  • The Windsor Spitfires oust the Oceanic and are off to the Memorial Cup semis;
  • In today's Habs sale update, La Presse has BCE and Quebecor battling it out. BCE is said to be behind Serge Savard, but they deny everything, using the old "we don't comment on rumours" line. Mmm. that's good media spin.
Wings-Hawks back at it on Sexy Friday night.

UPDATE - yours truly is fucking up the airwaves again on CBC Daybreak at 8:15 AM. I need coffee, fast.

Thursday, May 21, 2009

The Morning Skate waxes philosophical for Thursday, May 21st

Hey kids! Hope you're all doing well this morning. This is one of those mornings where you wonder why on earth you have a hockey blog in the off-season. There were no games last night to report on, and nothing new on the Habs sale or anything else of interest. Sure, there is some bullshit about a buyer for the Coyotes, and Drummondville is off to the Memorial Cup semis, but all in all, bleh. Wake us in September.

But then you think about taking a toke off the Vancouver Olympic torch, and all is better! WhalerCanes-Pensburgh back at it tonight.

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

The Morning Skate for Wednesday, May 20th

Bullet points for what you missed while dreaming of finding a human ancestor fossil...
  • Well the Hawks are fucked now. They outplayed the Wings, they came up with a clutch goal to tie it in the third, they outshot them, they outworked them, they overcame some shitty reffing... and they lost. One crappy play at the blue line in OT by Brian Campbell leads to a 3 on 1 rush by the Wings and it was over. 3-2 final;
  • In the Phoenix bankruptcy thingy, the judge basically says he's too lazy or bored to decide anything, tells everyone to take a time out, come back later and go to mediation.
There is no hockey tonight. Please do not panic. Resist the temptation to read or talk to loved ones. Do not attempt sexual relations, as years of TV radiation have left your genitals withered and useless.

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

The South has made me rise again

Many lap dances to regular FHF'er Tom who has pointed us to the fact you can now vote for who will be the next Atlanta Thrashers Blue Crew (i.e. their ice girls). God bless America. This story was so important we could not wait for Sexy Friday.

You get to pick five hopefuls for next year's squad. I voted for Amanda H., Candace (pictured above), Liz, Sarah F., and Terri with an "i". My criteria included skating ability, shovel skills, and enthusiasm. Your choice of criteria may vary.

The site says "Keep checking back as we add galleries leading up to the unveiling of the 2009-10 squad at the end of the week." Damn right we will. Fuck the Conference Finals, we've got a team of babes to pick.

The Morning Skate for Tuesday, May 19th

Bullet points for what you missed while dreaming of a repaired Hubble telescope...
  • Here's the good news for the Whalers - they managed to pretty much shut down Sid the Kid. The bad news is that the Pens have Miro Satan. Wait, what? Yes, apparently he's alive and scoring goals, and the Pens take Game 1, 3-2. Props to both goalies too, and Pittsburgh's knees;
  • St. Patrick is denying he got an offer to coach the Avs;
  • Things could get juicy in bankruptcy court today, as there will be a hearing on the whole Phoenix ownership thingy. Aren't you happy you have four lawyers to sort this out for you? The NBA, NFL, and MLB have thrown their support behind the NHL, and filed court briefs to that effect. Big fucking surprise.
Hawks-Wings back at it tonight.

Monday, May 18, 2009

The Morning Skate for Monday, May 18th

Bullet points for what you missed while having nightmares of screwing up your line-up card and forcing an American Leagues pitcher to hit...
  • The Wings-Hawks game was much closer than the 5-2 Wings final indicates, if you ask us, though most of that was due to the Bulin Wall. Very entertaining hockey game. We could get used to that. But frankly, it looks like the Hawks may be over-matched in the end, just like this game;
  • The Habs have been sold!
  • Just checking if you're still paying attention.
Pens-Whalercanes get it going tonight. Happy holiday, Canadians and Canadiens.

Friday, May 15, 2009

Sexy Friday gets a jump on the long Weekend Open Thread of Love

Since this will be up for an extra day, we figured we needed a third woman in there

Ola muchachos y muchachas! Yours truly is off to the land of the 56k modems this evening for the long Victoria Day / Dollard Day / Journée des Patriotes / Just Another Monday Off weekend. So we thought we'd combine Sexy Friday and TWOTOL into one sexy-riffic post. The Bruins hate is behind us (ha! it never leaves) so it's time to move on to the love.

The long weekend is highlighted by the beginning of the Conference Finals. Wings-Hawks goes Sunday afternoon, and Pens-Whalers starts on Monday night. What the hell, I'll even throw in a bold prediction for you - Wings and Pens each in five. Let's hear yours in the comments. Elsewhere in the sports world, if you are jonesing for some more Game 7's after last night, the NBA will hit you with two of them on Sunday. We're pretty sure there's baseball, but we don't give a crap. Man U and Arsenal go at it early tomorrow morning at Old Trafford, with Man U needing a single point in their last two matches to clinch the top of the table. Finally, The Preakness goes Saturday, with hot horse babe Rachel Alexandra as the favourite. Sexy Friday loves the fillies. We told you he has issues.

So enjoy the long weekend everyone (and by "everyone" I mean Canadians who aren't stuck at work for some reason Monday), and show each other some love.

As always, Sexy Friday copyright KSK

The Morning Skate for Friday, May 15th

Bullet points for what you missed while dreaming of pushing the Lakers to the brink...
Sexy Friday is enjoying the pain and suffering of the Bs this morning. Sexy Friday has some issues.

Thursday, May 14, 2009

The Morning Skate for Thursday, May 14th

Bullet points for what you missed while dreaming of some really primo bud...
  • Well that was a total bust. Look, you throw your lot in with a rookie goalie it may come back to bite you in the ass at some point. Last night was that point for the Caps. What do you think Jose Theodore was thinking? Pens win 6-2;
  • The Lost finale was outstanding.
Double Game Sevens tonight. Go WhalerCanes!

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Crank up the quote machine for the next 3 years

I think we can all agree that the Habs signing The Subbanator to a 3-year deal may be the highlight of the off-season.

The Morning Skate is finding all these Game Sevens kind of sexy for Wednesday, May 13th

This is of course Jeri Ryan who played Seven on ST:Voyager. Can HF10 get mad at this Star Trek reference?

Yo, what up homeys? Can you believe all this? First off, fuck those fucking WhalerCanes and their collapsing. That's why we like them - they're just like our Habs! Anyway, Tim Thomas, Savard, and Bergeron lead the way as the B's force a Game Seven with a 4-2 win. On the other side of the continent, Jonas Hiller continues to astound and amaze, stopping 38 shots to lead the Ducks to a 2-1 win over the Wings and force another Game Seven.

In other hockey news, RDS has identified one of the "Americans" interested in the purCHase. He's Graeme Roustan, who was actually born in Sherbrooke and grew up in the YUL. He has deep hockey roots, owning Nike Bauer Hockey, lobbying to get hockey to San Jose, building rinks everywhere, and buddying up with Pierre Boivin. Sounds good to us.

Buckle up for the big Pens-Caps Game Seven tonight. Or the Lost finale. Goddamn Yanni.

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Congratulations Blackhawks!

Your lovely Ice Crew will live to see another round. And really, that's all that counts. We don't give a shit about your hockey-playing abilities, but this photo shoot video is something we can get behind:

The Morning Skate for Tuesday, May 12th

Bullet points for what you missed while dreaming of having a Canadian coach...
  • Well Mr. Bettman won't have to worry about any Canadian teams from here on in, as the 'Nucks are gone thanks to a Patrick Kane hat trick in a 7-5 Chicago win. We find it hard to believe a game Roberto Luongo played had that score, but that's what it says;
  • Holy fuck the Caps-Pens series has reached epic proportions. David Steckel is the hero in the Caps' 5-4 OT win. This sets up an epic battle on Wednesday in Casa del HF29 as we must choose between the Game 7 in a classic series and the season finale of Lost. It's all Yanni's fault;
  • La Presse's Réjean Tremblay has a source that says there are four groups in the running to buy the CH, the Québecor group, the Serge Savard group, and two American groups. These groups have supposedly already met with Habs management. The source also says the sale should go through before the draft in June. All this for a team that still is not officially for sale.
Bruins and Ducks facing elimination tonight.

Monday, May 11, 2009

The Morning Skate for Monday, May 11th

Bullet points for what you missed while dreaming of winning without your two All-Stars...
  • Bruins stay alive with a 4-0 shutout win, on a night where three Boston teams all won. TMS despises the Bs and Sox with the passion of a million suns, yet has been a Celtics fan since he was like 5 years old. Go figure;
  • Wings are slowly bringing the Ducks back to Earth, take a 3-2 series lead;
  • Canada and Russia play a great game, but Canada can't score enough and lose 2-1 in the Double Eye final.
Caps-Pens and 'Nucks-Hawks back at it tonight.

Saturday, May 09, 2009

The Weekend Open Thread of Love is Heating Up

Hellooooo. So here's what we learned last night. Bruins suck. By some transitive property that means the Habs really sucked. That's right, Canes have a 3-1 series lead after Timmy Thomas returned to the old ways. I think "Go WhalerCanes!" is a chant we can all get behind. We also learned Pittsburgh has momentum, rookie Russian goaltenders are human, and Ovie can go knee-to-knee with the best of them. Finally we learned that JJ Abrams can make an excellent movie, even if serious Star Trek geeks may have some issues.

Oh hey, Canada won! That sets up the highlight of my TWOTOL, Canada-Russia for gold Sunday at 2 PM. And Pens-Caps go right back at it tonight even with a travel day, thanks to a Yanni concert on Tuesday in Pittsburgh. Yanni is all-powerful. 'Nucks-Hawks complete the Saturday night double-header. There's also plenty of hoops, Premiere League sponsored by Barclay's, the Fifth Major, and plenty of other stuff to discuss. Or go out and get a life. I keed, I keed. You think I won't be here with things heating up?

Friday, May 08, 2009

Sexy Friday is Having a Canada-Sweden IIHF Open Thread for Obvious Reasons

It's all about the hockey.

Canada-Sweden in the semi-finals of the 73rd (really?) IIHF Senior Ice Hockey Championships today at 2 PM EST. Here's a preview. The game is on TSN, but I can't seem to find out if it's on for people stuck at work and care about the game, i.e. me. I really hope we win, because a Canada-Russia or Canada-USA final would be fun to watch on a lazy Sunday afternoon.

Go Canada! Go Swedish babes!

As always, Sexy Friday copyright KSK

The Morning Skate for Friday, May 8th

Bullet points for what you missed while having nightmares of Manny being Manny...
  • Luongo was flawless for 57 minutes, but that ain't 60. Hawks tie it with 2:44 left, and Andrew Ladd's (who?) OT goal gives them the 2-1 win. Series all tied up;
  • Wings restore some order to the universe, chase Jonas Hiller and even their series with a 6-3 win;
  • Canada survives Latvia 4-2 at the Double Eye, will play Sweden in the semis today at 2 PM EST. Is TMS the only one who cares about this tournament?
Mmm, Sexy Friday.

Thursday, May 07, 2009

The Morning Skate changes things up for Thursday, May 7th

Yo, what up mothafuckas? TMS has decided that every now and then, he'll be dropping the bullet points in favour of some witty banter. Well, if this shit can be considered witty. OT mania last night! Too bad we were watching Lost and missed all of it. Kris Letang is the frakking OT hero as the Pens win their must-win game, 3-2. Malkin de-zombified, but Varlamaov was dominant in a game the Pens should have won much earlier. Bruins are down 2-1 after Jussi Jokinen is the hero in the Canes' 3-2 OT win. What is Carolina doing that the Habs couldn't? That may be rhetorical. Your last TSN link of the morning has Big Fat Bob Mackenzie trying to explain the Silly Balls situation. The only reason we bring this up is because it opens with this gem:

"Do you know why I went to journalism school?
Because I was too dumb to become a lawyer or an accountant"

You zinged yourself Bob! Well done. Happy Thursday everyone, enjoy Canada-Latvia. Latvian fans rule.

Wednesday, May 06, 2009

How could hockey in the desert fail?

As we mentioned in TMS this morning, Jim Balls-silly has put in a bid to buy the Coyotes and move them to Sarnia. Or Guelph. Or Etobicoke. But there are some fun facts that we sort of glossed over in our quickie morning format:

1. Phoenix filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy yesterday in court;
2. The restructuring plan for the team includes selling it to The Balls for $212.5 million, as long as he can move it to Southern Ontario;
3. Jimmy Balls has started a website to convince Canada we need another team. Like we need convincing;
4. No one told the NHL anything about this.

This all seems like one big Fuck You to Gary Bettman. If that's the case, we hereby express our support for this move.

The Morning Skate for Wednesday, May 6th

Bullet points for what you missed while having nightmares of running into the Texas police...
  • Canucks get some early goals, and this time Roberto Luongo holds the fort. Vancouver takes a 2-1 series lead with a 3-1 win;
  • NHL refereeing is turning into NBA refereeing. Wings got absolutely robbed with an early whistle on what should have been the tying goal, Jonas Hiller is dominating, and the Ducks beat the Wings 2-1 and take a 2-1 series lead;
  • Jim Balsillie offers to buy the now-bankrupt Phoenix Coyotes and move them to an unspecified Southern Ontario location. I like the sound of the Sarnia Coyotes.
Both East series back in action tonight. You know, Ovie-Sid and that other one.

Tuesday, May 05, 2009

The Morning Skate for Tuesday, May 5th

Bullet points for what you missed while dreaming of a Game 1 upset...
  • Holy Hat Trick Batman! Ovie and Sid EACH get 3G, but luckily for the Caps they have David Steckel who also scored, and the Caps win 4-3 to go up 2-0. Also, Evgeni Malkin may be a zombie, we're checking on that;
  • Marc Crawford has expressed his interest to Bob in a certain head coaching position. He speaks French, he's perfect!
  • Canada gets a wake-up call at the Double Eye, outshot by the Finns 54-32 and losing 4-3 in a seven round shootout. Canada still wins their pool and will play Latvia in the quarters on Thursday.
'Nucks-Hawks and Wings-Ducks double header tonight.

Monday, May 04, 2009

BGL continues to fight using words rather than fists

Several lap dances to FHF regular copyranter for shooting us this tip. Noted vegetarian (really?) Big Georges Laraque participated in a Concordia anti-fur demonstration over the weekend. If you can't get Pam Anderson, I guess BGL is the next best thing.

You know, I thought he was a real waste of money this year, but he's totally making up for it off the ice.

The Morning Skate for Monday, May 4th

Bullet points for what you missed while having nightmares of a collapsing dome...
  • It's always a pretty stupid goal by an unsung hero that wins it in 3OT, eh? Jonas Hilller holds the fort for the Ducks, then Todd Marchant just lets one fly towards the net and it somehow gets past Chris Osgood, giving the Ducks a 4-3 win and evening their series at 1;
  • Cam Ward shows TFS how it should have been done, blanks the B's 4-0. Oh, did I get the score wrong? Thank the NHL, who did their best to have Boston win, thanks to a pathetic disallowed goal that was a goal;
  • Canada moves to 5-0 at the Double Eye with a win over Norway. Am I crazy or is this tournament going forever without getting to a medal round or something?
Have a good week everyone.

Saturday, May 02, 2009

The Weekend Open Thread of Love is thinking about Sid-Ovie

Happy weekend everyone! Decent games last night. B's continue to roll along, with Timmy and Ryder (grrrr) leading the way. But it was the Wings game that had the excitement. Ducks showed they weren't going to be pushed aside like some flukey 8th seed, but Nick Lidstrom's goal in the final minute gave the Wings a 3-2 win. Wasted chance, Ducks.

So what are you watching this weekend? Ovie-Sid by any chance? Who gets the feeling already it won't live up to the hype? Celtics-Bulls game seven? Kentucky Derby? Bleu Nuit on TQS? (god I love this province) Anyone have a touch of the swine flu? Whatever you're watching, whatever you want to talk about, TWOTOL is Dear Abby, Ask Dr. Sanjay Guptha and Penthouse Forum all rolled into one.

Friday, May 01, 2009

Sexy Friday takes an in-depth look at the second round

It kills me to admit it, but the Bruins may already have won this thing. She must be from out of town.

As always, Sexy Friday copyright KSK


Lap dance to LG77 for pointing out that Habs legend Guy Lafleur has been found guilty of giving contradictory testimony during his son's bail hearing.

Meh. I committed worse crimes on my way to work this morning. However, he does seem to be facing up to 14 years in jail. Man those lawyers are nasty.

The Morning Skate for Friday, May 1st

Bullet points for what you missed whiled dreaming of triple overtime...
  • Canucks blow a 3-0 lead after two periods, but end up taking Game 1 anyway;
  • Steve Stamkos continues his run through the Double Eye, scoring 2 in a 5-1 win over the Czechs;
  • Lap dance to Melly who pointed us to this Larry Robinson story from RDS, which says Larry would be interested in the Habs head coaching job. TMS likes the idea. He could use a good assistant - we hear Carbo is available.
Bruins-Canes and Ducks-Wings start tonight. Happy Sexy Friday to all.