Ah the Bi-Polar nature of Halloween: girls in sexy costumes and cool terrifying masks like The Traitor - more Douc$harek apparel available soon on Ebay from GG11.
It's almost game time, and my stomach is sore. I'm not sure if it's from eating the Halloween candy we're supposed to be giving away - for free! - to neighbourhood brats or from laughing so hard at "Jaro's" game review. Without any hyperbole whatsoever, that was the funniest thing I've ever read on the Internet. Bravo.
My stomach may also be sore from bubbling over in acidic anticipation of The Return of Michael Komisarek. Formerly My Boy Komo finally comes back to play where he was drafted and developed yadda yadda yadda now he's Douc$harek and we all hate him:
Let's hit the Hallowe'en bullet point preview:
- If you're not reading this on your ifone/crackberry, you're likely watching it on your nearest tv right now
- available on virtually all Canadian Broadcasting Corporation channels, before God and a coast to coast audience to determine which team may find some interim relief from their solidly mediocre starts.
- Horrible Haunting Habs really suck on the road, having lost four straight.
- But the Frighteningly Scary Leafs still suck more: only one win all season.
- Habs win and we can all laugh and point and call Leafs' fans names cause their team only won one game all month. On the other hand, it might encourage more Leafs fans to sell their allegiance on Ebay, thereby infecting every fan base with irrational douchebag fan rah-rahism.
- I've done no research whatsoever but I'm guessing since the Laughs finally managed to win a game in Anaheim (and rather handily at that) and then earned road points in Dallas and Buffalo means The Big Ufas of 2009, Niceroad and Penalty King Komo and thir forwards generally must be sucking slightly less lately.
- I heard Grabby scored a shorty late in Sabreland to pickpocket a point last night. He's still a smurf fucker.
- The GiantMexicanTits experiment was a disaster, each of them finishing -2. Who knows which sap is next up in the rotation. BGL, maybe? Freakin' Stewie??
- TurtlePleks doesn't suck - he's actually good now. Until I said that (reverse jink). Or does Halloween mean the return of ZombiePleks from the (un)dead?
- A second liner Mad Max is not. Then again, I may have been a bit casual in tagging CHips as a career AHLer. Maybe. Not sure. Same with Stewie.
- BFW(tm) gets the start.
- To answer your question: Big Fat Whale, Carey Price. (Come on, I know it's blatant gimmick infringement of a colleague (sorry 4) but I can't get enough of that joke. "Cari is a big fat wale". Heh.)
- The scariest thing about it being October 31 is that February 2010 is still on long way off and so is Markov.
- Did I mention Leafs suck? God I love saying that. Please let them finish last even if it means the Bruins get a number one pick - the B's tend to give those away like candy on Halloween anyway.
- Both teams playing their third game in four nights, so we may see some goals. These and other actual game preview-like thoughts over at a CBC.ca blog.
- Rather than leave your home to visit a gentleman's club, stay home, surf the net and look at some ladies who, while intellectual and sharp as I'm sure they are, may be there the next time you decide to go out to such a club.
- Oh yeah, and happy Halloween, Habs fans. Let's hope the Habs show more talent and effort than Panger's pumpkin carving
Let's hears the screams and cries from all you Boils and Ghouls roaming out there this All Hallow's Eve in the comments.