Miami! Er, Sunrise! Home of this year's Pro Bowl! Feel the excitement. Zzzzzzz. Alright, everyone to the beach!Grab your towel and let's get wet - 7:30 PM start in Florida. It's another four-point game. Panthers are just 2 points behind the Habs in the standings, with a game in hand. Both teams coming off Saturday Night shutouts. Habs have won both games against the Panthers so far this year.
Fuck my travel agent, this hotel is only "beach access" - we're quite happy to have found our new friend over at The Rat Trick. Maybe he can put us up when we come to visit.
Hot like a Florida Beach - Jaro had a weekend to die for: 2-0-0, 0.50, .984. Slovakia for the gold! Squid of course, 5 points in his last 2 games, and some hot CHicken action, more goals in his brief Habs stint than in his entire career so far. Gio has a six-game point streak. Some props for Jaro 2.0 too. He's played much better lately. For the Panthers, really only Tomas Vokoun can be considered hot, with numbers to rival Jaro: 1-0-1, 0.48, .987 in his last 2. And he has 6 shutouts already this year.
Cold like a Florida Beach this past holiday season - Metro pointless in 5. But our really cold players, Dagger and PatCHes, are now both chilling in Hamilton. As much as one can "chill" in Hamilton. Half of Florida is cold - they aren't scoring a lot of goals. Dvorak and Reinprecht pointless in 4, McCabe pointless in 6.
Shit! That jellyfish stung me - Mara's upper body injury still not healed, and Big Tits still on the long-term shelf. Has anyone even heard about any sort of progress from him? For the Panthers, leading scorer Nathan Horton just broke his leg and is out 4-6 weeks.
Let's dive right in to tonight's Habs probable forward lines, as previewed at practice yesterday:
GMC
Squid - Pleks - MOEmaN
DarCHe Vader - Mad Max - Ben Maxwell (Mad Max 2.0?)
Urologist - Metro - Little Tits
That's, uh, intriguing. It won't last, I'm sure. No idea who the starting goalie is at this hour, but I would bet the kids' college fund on Jaro.
Post-game beach swimwear - Bikini, modeled by Alessandra Ambrosio. She's alright.
Grab a beverage with an umbrella in it and we'll see you in the comments
would it be too obscure or outdated to call maxwell "the silver hammer"?
ReplyDelete@ too close: Um, both?
ReplyDeleteAlso, is that Panther doing what I think he's doing back there?
we could call him Agent 86 for the most famous Maxwell ever to grace a TV guide
ReplyDelete+ 6 chicken toes for the giant chicken lounging on the beach beside the hottie.
ReplyDeleteLoving the striped faux-Adidas douchewear for the chicken!!!
Shit! That jellyfish stung me
ReplyDeleteQUICK! SOMEBODY PEE ON 46DD!!... never mind.
If I knew you were coming for the game we'd gladly host you! Just don't bring that jackass coach of yours over!
ReplyDeleteI have a bad feeling on this one. Your offence against our goaltender. Could be ugly, but then it's a Jacques Martin coached team vs. a Jacques Martin built team.
Enjoy the weather!
Ben Maxwell
ReplyDelete- Benny Max, Ben gay, Borg Max,
B-Max, Mini-B,
I vote for Agent 86. Guy Boucher says he's a smart player too, so Agent 86 fits pretty well. Also, it makes me think of Anne Hathaway, and that's nevera abd thing.
ReplyDeleteMaxwell skates up the ice... He's all alone!... Wait, what's he doing?... He appears to be answering a call on his skate!
ReplyDeleteMaybe the spirit of 99 will give him the scoring touch.
(Hadulf here, could never fix my account and i'm too lazy to create a new one - GG, you can read this with the Colonel accent, as usual).
ReplyDelete1. I definitely vote for Agent 86.
2. I definitely want to be where that panther is.
3. GG, nice bit on the skate-phone!
I showed that Panther every thing he knows...
ReplyDeleteAgent 86 gets my vote for now... Is got 48 hours to show is skills.
Jaro for President...
boo! y'alls is a bunch o' beatles haters.
ReplyDeleteIs golden girl asking for a golden shower?
ReplyDeleteAgent 69
ReplyDeleteIn the spirt of LOST coming back I would nickname him "Creepy Ben" or "Creepy" for short.
ReplyDeleteAh those are chicken feet. I thought they were dino feet.
@ Anonymous
ReplyDelete"I vote for Agent 86. Guy Boucher says he's a smart player too, so Agent 86 fits pretty well."
I didn't see the Get Smart movie but Don Adams' original character was anything but smart. Lots of fodder for GG11, however, so I like Agent 86.
P.S. Find some pics of Barbara Feldon.
Jaro gets the nod... anyone surprised.
ReplyDeleteI love that Ambrosio lady, how can she have so much fun by herself.
wv:carre ... carre will be warming up the bench againe.
BTW, GG is that Hamilton Island in the distance? Nice Habs logo in the sand.
ReplyDelete@Moe
ReplyDeleteHamilton Island, uh, ya, that's exactly what that is. Yes. Hamilton, uh, island. Great catch.
bea must have read my mind, that's what I was thinking - Max Smart, to go with Mad Max.
ReplyDeleteGG, love the cat claws on Sombrero Girl. @10, you have a dirty mind; thanks for sharing.
Alessandra is getting it "kitty style!" MEOW!
ReplyDeleteAnd, aren't some of these guys just pointless?
Maxwell House
ReplyDeleteI prefer determining his nickname depending on whether or not he sucks tonight.
ReplyDeleteI think the agent part is right, but we should go by his number...agent 61
ReplyDeletei think instead of discussing a crappy player's crappy nickname maybe talk hockey, this shit is turning into a joke
ReplyDelete@anon - you want to have serious hockey conversations? By all means, please, go ahead. To HIO or the HFBoards.
ReplyDeletenow let's talk Kraft Dinner again!
Easy mac is very convenient but just isn't the same as the original.
ReplyDeleteAgreed, it's not the same. But I do like the Easy Mac. Has anyone tried those crazy flavours though?
ReplyDeleteTriple cheese is yummy. Tomato should be illegal.
ReplyDeleteI like the little KD cups, the triple cheese are really good.
ReplyDelete@HF29: The alfredo one was pretty horrible. I havn't tried the others.
ReplyDeleteThat microwavable mac & cheese stuff should be banned. If you're so lazy that you need a microwave to make mac & cheese, well uh... you're very lazy. Yeah.
ReplyDeleteAs for hockey talk, I think the strategy should be to try to score more goals than the other team.
@Kevin
ReplyDeletebest kept secret is cooking the orinal stuff in the micro. 3/4 hot water for 9 minutes and no draining. Much easier than the whole gas stove/pot of boiling water for the kids.
you guys call yourselves habs fans but argue about nicknames and other bullshit, get a clue
ReplyDelete@anon
ReplyDeletenot meaning to be rude but if you can't tell by reading these blogs and posts most of the regulars are pretty die hard fans and spend the days after a loss sulking pretty hard... go have your fun on the tsn boards arguing with maple leafs fans if you don't like it.
ps.. i really want to be rude but i will refrain.
pps.. go fuck yourself
Sean Gordon tries to go legaleze on the BGL to Sweden rumour;
ReplyDeleteGordon should learn how to use links .
ReplyDelete~~~
WV = paddl
@anon
ReplyDeleteI know exactly what the problem is. You need to go to dashboard and unclick the "gun to your head" box. That'll free up your computer to go anywhere else your teeny weeny heart desires.
You want a clue?
ReplyDeleteTry reading some of the past posts here to see what the site is about.
If you're still confused after that, I'm sorry. For you.
And if you read other posts and you still don't like it then maybe instead of complaining you could you know, fuck off to some place where the people think like you. Life's too short to piss and moan.
wv - phophoof, which is pretty silly when you think about it, hardly the sort of word verification we should have to put off with on a sharp-edged, analytical hockey blog such as this. I demand better word verifications dammit!
Zee Anoyimous is de catch of de day…
ReplyDeleteI'd like to be the first to suggest "KD" as the nickname for Habs prospect Mac Bennett (drafted this past year).
ReplyDeleteBut hey, why talk about nicknames? The never-ending Halak-Price discussion, which has no bearing on Bob's decisions and inevitably degenerates into name-calling, is obviously a much more productive use of the intertubes.
WV: "meatlioli". Hmm, I dunno what it is, but it sounds delicious.
I think anonymous is Bertrand Raymond in disguise.
ReplyDeleteGG's babe on da beaCH selection looks like Maria Sharapova.
ReplyDelete@Moe
ReplyDeleteNot sure. But let's give her a nickname to piss off Anon (aka BR).
I'm calling her CatsMeow. (methinks Moey would approve)
ReplyDeleteYou're CHanging my heart
ReplyDeleteOne, two, three, four
Tell me that you're gonna score
Sleepless, long nights
That was what last week was for
Old and teenage hopes are alive at FHFs door
BR left us with nothing, we wanted no fucking more!
Oh, oh, oh,
You're CHanging my heart
Oh, oh, oh,
You know who you are, Pleks!
TFSweetheart do you have a bitter heart,
Who is JM's #1, he can tell them apart
Two wins in a Ja-row,
Put the Halak before the cart
Those purewool hoes with Gu:( tears in their eyes
Will RDS be scared to rub up to CHicken's thighs
Oh, oh, oh,
You're CHanging my heart
Oh, oh, oh,
You know who you are, Squid!
One, two, three, four, five, six, nine, or ten
Money can buy you back the dormroom KD that you had then
One, two, three, four, five, six, nine, or ten
Money can buy you better mac&CHeese and now Max&Ben!
Oh, oh, oh,
You're CHanging my heart
Oh, oh, oh,
You know who you are, Jaro!
Oh, oh, oh,
You're CHanging my heart
Oh, oh, oh,
You know who you are, Kirk!
(ba-ba-ba-da, ba-ba-ba-da-da)
(ba-ba-ba-da, ba-ba-ba-da-da)
(ba-ba-ba-da, ba-ba-ba-da-da)
(ba-ba-ba-da, ba-ba-ba-da-Pants!)
Ooh, those crazy Habs boys
Sometimes breaking our heart
Ooh, those crazy Habs boys
Don't fall apart
Devo is set to whip up some excitement at the 2010 Vancouver Olympics.
ReplyDeleteThe influential new-wave innovators behind the '80s smash
``Whip It'' will perform live at a medal celebration in Whistler, B.C., on Feb. 22.
Not through being cool! (Bonus for the kidz that get the edited reference)
BlEuNuOIT Pouliot is single handedly saving my fantasy team! Now if the Mekanec could follow suit Id be hunting a podium finish....
ReplyDeleteLet's go Boys! Now is not the time to be getting fucky too many good things developing after all looked hopeless and lost ten days ago...
WV: masup
Mash it up nah do da ting ting!
@anonymous: You must be a FHF virgin. Very original screen name by the way.
ReplyDelete@moeman: genious.
PS. i found some shitty whole wheat KD. It taste like cardboards covered in KD cheese stuff. Not bad actually.
@gillis
ReplyDeleteI also bought whole wheat KD by accident. The box was tastier.
I really hate KD. Gotta get real macaroni and make your own cheese sauce. While the macaroni's boiling, nuke the sauce in the microwave. Melt 1 tbsp butter, add some corn starch to make a rue. Add a cup of milk and stir. Nuke for a minute. Stir. Repeat until thick. About 3 minutes should do. Add whatever fucking cheese you have around. Could be cheeze whiz, cheddar, parmasan (fresh), or spray cheese if you're in USA. Any or all combinations. Add 1 tbsp or Italian seasoning and add to the macaroni. If desired, add whatever meat or meat by-products you have lying around (hamburger, tuna, hotdogs, bologna). Fuck, now I'm hungry.
ReplyDeleteWAAAY better than KD.
I was just thinking about our third line. So we have DarCHe Vader, lord of the evil empire, Mad Max - the Road Warrior (pff - doesn't play like it), and Maxwell Smart, a bumbling spy.
ReplyDeleteIf we can't come up with a clever name for this line, it's time to shut this site down. Gotta head out.
Later.
LD
@L Dude, "If we can't come up with a clever name for this line, it's time to shut this site down."
ReplyDeleteWe could call the line 'Anonymous'
A Moe love the line name.
ReplyDeletemicrowavable KD make sme think of frozen peanut butter sandwiches (as sold in the good old USofA)
whatever happened to enjoy good food ??? I'm with LD@Anon I come to this site for the recipes. if I want good hockey analysis, I watch Duthie and his panel or l'Antichambre (DUH)
WV bysentib the Laffs are managed in the most peculiar byzantine manner (obvisouly the habs are not)
It's gotta be Max Factor. I don't know where the hell I dredged that up from , but it sounds good. And, just think of all the plays you can make on it!!! Oh, it's a brand of makeup? Even better! I'm sure you can apply it to your photoshop images.
ReplyDeleteFHF blog is widely read.
ReplyDeleteFine Cooking has stolen the KD thread by having a Ultimate Mac & Cheese on their cover
So some dipshit wants to talk serious hockey? Fuck that, I thought I was safe here, but it won't hurt to stock up on the following:
ReplyDeleteGarlic
holy water
Crucifixes
Silver bullets
Wooden stakes
Oh, and does anyone here eat Heinz canned spaghetti? Yummy with cut up 'dogs too.
bea. That's kind of funny because I just scarfed down a supper to die for: Peanut Butter and Banana sandwich. And a big glass o' chocollate milk. Livin' the life baby!
ReplyDeleteMrs. LD is at her book club (pff, and she says hockey is a waste of time), and the kids are at a friend's house Mass Effect 2-ing. Just got a call "Dad this is friggin' awesome - we HAVE to get this right away." Such passion....
Anyway, so I figured this meal just dirties one knife, which I basically cleaned off in my armpit and returned to the knife tray. Quick rinse of the glass and voila. I could dig the single life...for a while at least.
Anyway, go anon go.
How bout for the line: KAOS
ReplyDelete@LD I have no problem with peanut butter sandwitches. onmost day, it's my breakfast.
ReplyDeletebut buying it in the frozen section to gain time - that I don't get
@Gillis what a beaut
WV cogion - the cogion(es) on this website are MONSTERous
Hope CoaCH Martin has a nice Florid-Ã -propos suit tonight.
ReplyDeletemoeman: I'm looking forward to his Miami Vice whites with pastel shirt.
ReplyDeleteGreat. You guys got me imagining him was gonna have a sweet suit... grey purple and blue? He needs to be more like avery and get an internship at vogue
ReplyDeleteRDS just gave us a glimpse and methinks JM has the same suit he wore on Saturday night. Maybe they lost his luggage or he likes the CHampagne scent from the CHez Parée visit after the shutout win.
ReplyDeleteIf we keep talking about food, fashion and funbags we are gonna drive away a lot of Anons.
ReplyDeleteWith BGL half-way to Ikealand, might I suggest to the owners of this fabulous and fashionable blog an update the glossary entry. Maybe a posthumous one for BR?
ReplyDeleteJust joining in here before bowing out for all day meetings. Is it just me, or does it feel like the Habs have already been to Florida 4 times already this year. I feel like they've played the whole SE division every week since October. Not that there's anything wrong with that.
ReplyDelete@orangeman JM likes his old playground
ReplyDeleteBTW, FHFers, your Agent's # is 61.
ReplyDeleteJust walked in. I didn't miss anything. Yay!
ReplyDeletethere was the witty exchange!!!
ReplyDeletemisc comments from upthread:
ReplyDelete@moe - Feist-licious
@gillis - KAOS for the win, tho moe's "anonymous" made me spit take
@moey - is there anything you DON'T put hot dogs in?
@everyone - you gotta FRY the PB and banana sandwiches. heaven. just ask Elvis
my fuck this game is boring.
ReplyDeleteheh, ref is looking squarely at Hammer get a stick to the face and thinks what would ron maclean do.
ReplyDeleteWhilst waiting for the action to pick up, did anyone else read renaud lavoie's love letter to bertrand? Reads like an altarboy's diary entry about his fave priest. Thank God Mom cleaned the sheets.
ReplyDeletePING!
ReplyDeleteI like that Weiss guy.
ReplyDeleteat this rate im gonna need something to keep me awake for the rest of the game
ReplyDeleteHF29, Put some meth in your KD or google Miranda Kerr+bikini.
ReplyDeleteor listen to DEVO!
ReplyDeletethat's some quality standing around in your own zone boys
ReplyDeleteHF29,
ReplyDeleteI'll take the fifth on that.
GORGEOUS!!
ReplyDeletePleks is the hot dog in the PP KD!
ReplyDeletethat was one of those PP's where if it was in Montreal, the fans would have booed and screamed "shoot" and they would have. on the road, the patience paid off
ReplyDeletehow's that for hockey talk, anonymous???
ReplyDeletepeople with insomnia have just found a cure
ReplyDeleteHF29, is the FHF court granting Moey immunity?
ReplyDeleteand of course, the time it takes me to type they score.
ReplyDeleteYEAH. I'd rather look like an idiot than have the Habs lose
@moe + moey, we're in deliberations
ReplyDeleteright now i can't do anything as my ears are bleeding and im vomiting from seeing BR on the screen
ack! BR is already back. So much for 'decanting' his cheap whine.
ReplyDeleteWhile I'm here in my office "getting the papers I forgot" aka checking the score, I notice Les Boys have a staggering 10 shots thus far and realize I ain't missing much. Stay awake kids.
ReplyDeleteFor the poolies and those in all day meetings, Vodkov and Squid assisted on the PPG.
ReplyDeleteland on a small pacific island and was lucky to find a high speed connection to log on atdhe.
ReplyDeletei can't fuck'n believe it! br on rds.
mother fucker is uglier than fuck and dumber than duh. is rds trying to scare their viewer, i think so.
thanks mom and dad for an education, i might have end up at rds.
and FUCK rds
@moe... Devo lyric...BR has one chromosone too many
ReplyDeleteYou should get a delay of game penalty every time you play the trap.
ReplyDelete*yawn*
At least I have time to organize my laptop files alphabetically while watching.
Hey, let's start up with the nicknames again. At least that was interesting. Maybe @anonymous will have a hissy fit again. What about Boringus Maximus?
+ 1 devolution for lehab.
ReplyDeleteSo I'm watching Bob Mackenzie's top 30 mid-season draft eligibles. At #14 he's got some Minnesota high school kid named Bjugsted at 14 (I don't know how to spell it - it's gone off the screen). Anyway, I imagine the Habs will be all over that guy.
ReplyDeleteand he had a mic and he had a pen and he pissed us off at FHF
ReplyDelete@L Dude, good observation. Me, I'm waiting for BRs Top 30.
ReplyDelete@lehab, dat is bouncy!
ReplyDeletefuck fuck fuck
ReplyDeleteI can't get me no, satisHabtion.
ReplyDeletethis game is going nowhere. did we hit double digits in shots yet?
ReplyDeleteyikes that was close to the end of the game
ReplyDeletehang on for the point boys! please!
I saw the penalty shot, but what little fuckitty fuck caused it?
ReplyDeletemy fault. shouldn't have mentioned the point.
ReplyDeleteMoey Gorges hooking on a breakaway
ReplyDeletemy policy of not really watching the game (everytime I do, they win) is not paying off.
ReplyDeletenot that I'm watching.
back to the old familiar team
OUIN
Why oh why do they do this to us? Give us hope, then rip our hearts out, stomp on them and set them aflame.
ReplyDelete*wail*
The stupid announcer for the Panthers just told the world that the "H" in the Canadiens logo stands for "Habs".
ReplyDeleteWhat a f#$kin moron. Fire that idiot.
Why couldn't they just take a big piss in the Panther's litter box?
ReplyDeleteI hate them again.
let the recriminations begin!
ReplyDeleteNot 60 minutes.
ReplyDeleteBonsoir kidz.
it's BR fault. Fuck him, fuck RDS (reseau des stupides)
ReplyDelete@don -- even more shameful, that florida announcer was bill lindsay, who actually wore the CH. is there a way to strike him from the all-time roster ? what a fuckstick.
ReplyDeleteYawn. Fuck.
ReplyDelete@Moey: coincidentally, speaking of little fuckity fucks, I too saw the PS goal, but missed the hook that caused it. The coincidence? I was watching Dreger's top 10 likely to be traded. He wasn't there, but if the Stars look to be out of the playoffs, he figures THE little fuckity fuck may have a good shot at being moved. Dare to dream.
are'nt we back down to 9th yet?
ReplyDeletewe'll hover on the EDge and not make it in the end.
and throw away our draft pick.
ARRGH
bea. I believe that's correct. Atlanta and Florida move up to #7 and 8. Habs/Rags/B's move down to 9,10,11. Isles to 12.
ReplyDeleteThe good news. The Bruins are in 11th.
edit: Atlanta to 6th, Flyers 7th...whatever.
ReplyDeleteSo we're back to sucking? Ok, I'll just go ahead and adjust expectations accordingly.....
ReplyDeleteOk, recalibrated to a 4-2 loss tomorrow in TB. Perhaps 20 shots if we're lucky. Habs will go into 3rd down 3-1, score early, give us hope, actually play properly for 19 minutes, then give up empty netter in last minute. They might not be consistant in any sense of the word (how can you go from what happened Sat night to this?), but at least they're predictable.
@anon (way up) - I watched the game, and read the comments on FHF, and frankly the debate about the KAOS line etc. was a lot more entertaining than the game. Even maybe the KD recipes.
ReplyDeleteI think lines 1 and 2 (CamoPlex Moan and Gino MexiChick) played two good consecutive shifts, but that may have just been a dream. (I'm pretty sure the part where Miranda Kerr was lap dancing Jaro was a dream.)
snore
- Le12
Cancel the parade, the sky is falling...
ReplyDeleteMore depressing than the 17 shots?
ReplyDeleteOttawa won 3-0 tonight with only 18...
I prefer baking my KD. KD Casserole.
ReplyDeleteWV: PROUTE! Yea, tonight's game suffered from a heavy dose of trap beans. Stinky.
This'll probably be in TMS but this should make Youppi! happy, which in turn will make some of you mad because you hate Youppi!.
ReplyDeleteJust found KD Spicy Szechwan. Now THAT is sacreligious.
ReplyDelete