Not-so-deep thoughts on Flyers 3, Mad Max 2

As mentioned in TMS, I'm still trying to process my thoughts about the game last night. Five hours later, I still don't have a coherent theme running through my head. So there's only one way to try to come to a conclusion - shit out all my thoughts, random-style! So with apologies to those who do the quick bullet reviews much better than I (Number31, Boone), here are some superficial thoughts about last evening's sporting contest:

• Well that was pretty dull from a violence perspective. Where were all the fireworks? Despite my desire for peace, I was expecting war. I can't even rant about goonery, for there was very little. Please do better the next time we play;
• So exciting to see the glory of a francophone goal-scorer in action! A wondrous 50 foot wrist shot that should never have gone in! A beautiful lame duck shot traveling 3 miles per hour deflected by a Philly D between Boucher's legs! Quel marquer talentueux!
• Approximate time the Habs spent in the Flyers zone between the start of the second period and about 3 minutes left in the game: 0;
• Here's a list of allegedly offensive players who failed to show any offense whatsoever last night: Gomez, Gio, Squid, Pleks, Gomez, Tits, Gomez, Gomez;
• Here's a list of allegedly defensive players who failed to show any defense whatsoever last night: SpatCHes, Hamr, SpatCHes, Hamr, Picard, SpatCHes, Hamr. Maybe I am being a bit harsh on the Czechs. They had some moments, like 2 or 3. Not 60;
• What drug did the Habs take during the first intermission? I want some; I want to be a lethargic zombie too!
• I know what the drug is, it's the Count Chokula Choke 'em Defensive Shell (available in tablets and 40-minute time release capsules);
• I don't recall a Habs faceoff win all night;
• Carey Price is a good goalie;
• Carey Price is a good goalie;
• Carey Price is a good goalie;
• Carey Price is a good goalie even with more men in his crease than in a Jasmin St. Claire sex scene;
• Yanick Weber on the fourth line is turning into an EPIC FAIL. Srsly, what's the point? IIRC, he didn't even do anything on the PP. IMHO, it's impossible to go from playing 25 minutes as an aggressive scoring D in Hamilton to 10 minutes as a checking forward in Montreal. WTF, why bother?
• Lego is working his fucking ass off shift after shift more than any player on the team right now. Maybe try throwing him with some actual wingers Coach? Give him some of Gomez' playing time? Or is any of this too logical for you?
• CHicken showed some real flashes of brilliance last night. CHicken showed some real stupidity on a tripping penalty last night;
• The moribund PP that was showing flashes of coming around is headed back to being moribund;
• The last two periods were just a replay of last year's playoffs right? Flyers use their size, Habs can't use their speed and the goalie is left to the wolves. Mmmm, flashbacks;
• There's a classic Star Trek episode on TV in the background as I write this - Balance of Terror. In the ep, our heroes on the Enterprise (the Habs) battle the evil Romulans (the Flyers) in a tension-filled chess game of cat and mouse played out brilliantly between Kirk and the Romulan Commander. Each side has its strengths, and spends time looking for the smallest weakness in their opponent to exploit in order to strike the right blow to win the battle. In the end, Kirk plays dead in order to draw the Romulans in for the kill, and the Enterprise wins. Last night was nothing like that. Except for the "playing dead" part.

IN CONCLUSION, the sky is falling. Today at least.