Suckfest Habs vs. Suckfest Pens. WHO YA GOT? Game preview and open thread

In honour of the biggest Steeler fan on the internet, Christmas Ape from Kissing Suzy Kolber, and in recognition of the Stillers' glorious win, we, uh, borrow Ape's awesome WHO YA GOT? format for the game tonight. We've got two teams in the midst of total suckitude, so WHO YA GOT?

Contestants

Montreal Canadiens____Pittsburgh Penguins

Aptly Descriptive Team Nickname

Nos Glorieux____Mario's debt

Kick-Ass Team Bloggers

4 out of 5 Finnish hockey bloggers agree that FHF kicks ass____The Pensblog rules the internet. Just ask them.

Statistical Proof of Suckitude

Losers of 5 of their last 6____Mired in 10th place in the East

Cause of Suckitude

I don't even know where to start____The crazy yelling guy in the photo above

Gratuitous crotch shot to distract you from the suckitude

Don't worry, it's SFW

Disastrous Injury Team May Never Recover From

Robert Lang____Sergei Gonchar

Lingering Question

How can a team picked to contend for the East suck so much?____How can a team picked to contend for the East suck so much?

Finishing Move

Firing the coach?____Firing the coach?

So who ya got?

Collapsing Habs vs. Collapsing Flyers. WHO YA GOT? Game Preview and Open Thread

In honour of Christmas Ape from Kissing Suzy Kolber being Weekend Daddy over at Deadspin, we, uh, borrow his awesome WHO YA GOT? format for the big weekend home and home (game one tonight at 7 PM at the Phone Booth). We've got two teams in the midst of collapse, so WHO YA GOT?

Contestants

Montreal Canadiens____Philadelphia Flyers

Aptly Descriptive Team Nickname

Nos Glorieux____Broad Street Bullies

Kick-Ass Team Bloggers

Open your fucking eyes____The awesome ladies of flyers.femme and eager to go psycho. You know, for a blog that objectifies women, FHF sure has alot of women readers and friends. Discuss.

Cause of Collapse

February____Curse of Danny Brière for choosing Philly over Habs

Franchise hopes pinned on

The Franchise Saviour (tm)____Bob Clarke's untimely death

Reasons to Hate

Jealousy over 24 Stanley Cups____We'll give you Ten Reasons

Fans known for

Booing team for not showing up____Booing anyone who shows up

Finishing Move

Blowing lead in 3rd period____Anything that gets a suspension from the league

Alright let's do this thing!