Showing posts with label Sean Avery is gay - and I'm not talking about liking dudes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Sean Avery is gay - and I'm not talking about liking dudes. Show all posts

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

PK on Broadway: Rangers Game Preview and Open Thread

Tonight, PK Subban gets to take his mega-watt smile and polarizing demeanor to the city that never sleeps as the Habs take on the Broadway Blueshirts. Will Montreal be another smash hit like Billy Elliot, or will they end up with a trail of broken bodies and bad reviews like Spider-Man: Turn Off the Dark?

Curtain, Lights: 7:00 pm at the "World's Most Famous Arena" (cough, cough - not because of you, Rangers - cough cough) on RDS, actual full nation TSN, and the MSG network. Habs have actually won three of four, while the Rangers have taken three straight.

Names above the marquee: Do you get the feeling PK would be on a Times Square billboard already if he wore a Ranger's jersey?  At the very least Don Cherry would love his moxie rather than call him uppity. Eyes are on him and the Whizzer (6 points in 6 games as a Hab) as nearly the last men standing on the Habs blueline. Scott Gomez (he of the 13 points in his last 12 - it's true!) returns to where he signed his massive contract in the first place. He should be up for this. All Star Carey Price is always center stage because this team can't score, but it looks like understudy Alex Auld goes tonight. Understudy Lars Eller also gets a game in place of lead tenor Squid. For the Rangers, Brandon Dubinsky is the new Ron Duguay, leading the team in scoring and swooning ladies in the crowd. Marian Gaborik is ever dangerous but currently ice cold. All Star King Henrik Lundqvist remains one of the NHL's best and All Star Marc Staal is quickly becoming a game-changer on defence.

Bit players: Rangers made a move for some offence to cover for the season ending injury of Alex Frolov by acquiring Wojtek Wolski for "much-maligned" defender Michael Rosival. With all New York's injuries, guys like rookie Derek Stepan and Artem Anisimov have been getting some valuable minutes. Captain Chris Drury will never live up to his contract (signed the same day as Gomez) but Rangers fans seem to have accepted him. Habs need much more from supposed headliners Pleks and Big Tits; both are in prolonged slumps and there isn't a lot of help coming from the bottom two lines so it's far more noticeable.

Your understudies will be: Weber is in because Markov and Gorges are out for the year. Eller is back in as Squid fights off "flu-like" symptoms. Rangers could cast an entire production with their injury list, as Vinny Prospal, Derek Boogard, Ryan Callahan, Erik Christensen and Alex Frolov are all definitely out, and former Habs first-rounder Ryan McDonagh is questionable. Wolkski may have to play defence and wing to make up the shortfall.

Playing the fool as always: Sean Avery. Still around, still an asshole. Sigh.

Scathing reviews courtesy of: Interesting look at the business of hockey through the Rangers over at BlueSeatsBlog. Wait, there's a blog that isn't run by snarky, photoshopping weirdos with a penchant for swearing? Yep. Good for them.

Aprés show entertainment: Um, it's New York. If you can't find something to do aprés show in New Freaking York, I can't help you.

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Rangers Game Preview and Open Thread

We accept any and all excused to post photos of ultra-hot Canadian-girl-next-door Elisha Cuthbert. Finally, a reason to justify Sean Avery's existence.
At this point we've just about given up, so we're taking ignorance over enlightenment in this preview and ask this question: If we pretend we don't know they suck, will they stop sucking?
  • 7:30pm EST/ 5:30 MST at the Phone Booth;
  • Some team named the "Rangers", who apparently are from the state of New York, are in town;
  • I'm told that Montreal's hockey team is currently in the running for a playoff position in direct competition with these "Rangers", suggesting that the game may be a passionate affair;
  • Now I'm being told that the work "passionate" is used inappropriately in any sentence also containing the phrase "Montreal's Hockey Team";
  • several media outlets are reporting that a young 21-year old by the name of "Kerry Price" will be starting the match in from on Montreal's net this evening. He sounds like a nice guy - I hope Montreal fans don't expect too much from this guy, who is probably getting his first shot in the NHL at 21;
  • I heard that some guy named Patrick Brisebois just played his 1,000 NHL game; Unbelievable! He must be a superstar to have hung around that long;
  • Alex Tanguay got a cold from what I can only assume is his best friend Alex Kovalev, who will be playing tonight. I bet Alex feels bad about getting Alex sick, and so Alex will play doublely-hard to make up for the absence of Alex;
  • I'd make a joke about replacing coaches for the eight time in ten years, but instead I'm going to go cry in my green beer and long for the days of Al MacNeil.

Please enjoy St Patrick's Day by drinking until you can't feel the Habs pain anymore. And leave some comments - assuming the bar has free wireless.