Let's just toss this one away and get on with our lives - Rangers 6, Habs 3

I remember a time in FHF's history when there were games we wouldn't even review. No one had the stomach for it, or there was just nothing really to say about the game or we were all just lazy. Sure, barely anyone read us back then (Jordi, where are you? Bryan?) so it didn't really matter, but sometimes it was a good idea. I think last night's game fits the bill. We should just toss it in the trash, the way the Habs D tossed Carey in there, and forget about it.

In fact, I think you should all take the day off from hockey, and we can regroup tomorrow. We've had a rough couple of weeks. It's a beautiful spring day. Go for a walk. Spend some time with your kids. Watch March Madness. Get going on your spring cleaning. Hire a cheap hooker. Hire a cheap hooker to do your spring cleaning for you. The world has so much to offer.

If you want to hang out, of course you're welcome to. Questions for discussion about last night include:

• Should CHokula have started Auld in the first place?
• Have our injuries finally caught up to us?
• What's wrong with Squid? With The Mexican? (that one's rhetorical)
• Are you impressed the Habs came back a bit and fought pretty well after being down 5-1?
• What will the media say about PFK's little dance late in the second?
• Were you drunk?

If you need me, I'll be checking the erotic services ads in the back of The Mirror. This place is a mess.

Muddled thoughts on a middling weekend - DarCHe Vader the Kosher CHicken 3, Sabres 2; Kovy over some random crappy team

Good morning Habs fans! I'm sure you're all as hungover as I am from the HIO summit, so I am not sure we can coherently digest the weekend that was. All I've got is a bunch of muddled thoughts about two games that are muddled in my head. Or maybe they're middled. Middling? Meddling? I need to buy a dictionary. On to the lazy-ass bullet points, TMS-style!

• I think everyone on the internet who is fighting over the intellectual property of the name "PhD line" should chill the fuck out. Oooh, you took the three letters of the last names of the players and put them together. Aren't you clever!
• The line does deserve a name, however, given they were the only forwards that showed up for the weekend. DarCHe and The Moyle just work and work and work. And it's rubbed off on CHicken. They single-handedly (triple-handedly? single-wingedly?) won the Buffalo game. Mazel Tov indeed;
• They were the only forwards who showed up, but Ca-rey! was there all weekend, making key save after key save with both opponents and his own players crowding his crease and crashing into him. He's also playing behind a "defense" that can charitably be described as crap right now. They were a bit better against Buffalo, but c'mon, it's Buffalo. They are ahead of only New Jersey in the East;
• Speaking of New Jersey, I just found out I am going to the Meadowlands for Devils-Flames when I go to visit my American relatives for their thanksgiving. I'm sure even that game will be more entertaining than the first 55 minutes of last night's game;
• Yes, the last 5 minutes of last night were its only highlight. Where the fuck was that team for the first 55 minutes? They skated circles around the Sens, they went to the net, they found each other with crisp passes, and FUCKING HELL GIO SCORED A GOAL. Too little too late, you fuckers;
• The Artist Formerly Known As The Artist was, uh, artistic last night. Blame the Habs fans at the Bell for booing him. It's the only thing that can motivate the guy;
• Is 4 games enough time for me to start complaining about Vodkov? Well I don't care what you think, I'll say it anyway. He seems like a shadow of his former self. He's not right;
• Count Chokula has become Carbo-esque in his line-juggling. I don't necessarily blame him, he had to do something to our moribound offence. But I saw more lines over the weekend than at a Charlie Sheen hookers 'n blow party;
• Don't forget we turned the clocks back last night. I don't want you showing up to work early tomorrow. This has been a public service announcement from FHF;
• The Mexican was a disaster in Buffalo. He's one of the the fastest skaters on the team, and as he broke in on odd-man rushes he would SLOW DOWN or TURN BACK AWAY FROM THE NET. WTF? He was admittedly somewhat better last night, but it didn't really lead to any offense as he couldn't recognize his wingers on any given shift;
• The "PP". 'Nuff said;
• I'm not sure when the last time I heard a play by play guy say "Maxim Lapierre";
• Squid taking a slashing penalty in the OFFENSIVE ZONE while the Habs were on a 5 on 3 wins the prize as the stupidest thing of the weekend, and that's saying something;
• While Chokula is busy juggling the forward lines, he's juggling the defensive pairings too. Sign him up for Cirque du Soleil;
• Habs have now lost 3 out of 4, and were it not for a third line early Hanukkah miracle, we'd be in some real tsuris on a four-game losing streak.

In conclusion, it's a good day for some football.

Rising Up for the Win: Habs 4 - King 3 BUT! Sleepwalking to a Loss: Bruins 3 - Pajamas 1

What can we say.

A split decision.

A potential 6-game losing streak, averted.

A loss to an important rival.

A last minute win against a promising young team.

Shut down by a formidable bruin defense.

Kovalev benched for the entire third (-57 seconds).

The confirmation that Montreal will not finish in the top four.

The real concern that the team won't get out of the first round.

The sudden realization that this 100th year anniversary season will be more about a tribute to past glory than future accomplishments.

The inevitable worries about the coach's ability to guide this team in the proper direction.

The arrival of Old Kovy in a new doghouse.

A team who's leading scorer will not tally 65 points.

A team who's leading scorer may not be a forward.

The diminished anxiety about planning a wedding in June.

The promise that I will receive a reimbursement for 90% of my playoff tickets.

The frustration that the paid 10% will have been a waste of money.

The real issue between Kovalev and Koivu.

The necessity for the GM to make a move.

The ship, while not sinking, is not going to dock where we had hoped it would.

The decision that this team isn't worth a picture.

The bullshitting you about that last one, because I just don't want to look for one.

The wondering out loud if Santonio Holmes can learn how to skate before the playoffs.

The Weekend Afternoon Skate

Just some bullet points for a rainy Sunday afternoon in Montreal...

• Yours truly is bemoaning the end of the Corey Locke era. I think I was his only supporter in all of Habtopia;
• Lightning think they're the Islanders, sign Vinny to an 11-yeat contract extension;
• As FHF commentor Matt Fear the Collapse pointed out, brand new transfer agreement my ass, as Radulov breaks his contract to play with Ufa and date Russian supermodels;
• FHF friend Wraparoundcurl has lost her Canucks in an ugly break-up. She's looking for a new team. Go tell her we don't like no bandwagon jumpers around here.

Now if you'll excuse me, I'm off to get drunk to forget my Corey Locke love.

The West Coast games are too late, and I don't have RDS anyway: The Bullet Points Game Review

Bullet point review from a guy who crashed into bed exhausted due to work and chasing 16-month old daughter commitments:

• Your obligatory "frustrated, beaten once again Coyote" reference is above;
• Price recovers from sunburn on face and red-light burn on neck to make 37 stops;
• Kovy has three assists, including 500th of career;
• Koivu scores again, Higgins has two assists ... is line 1B heating up at the right time?
• Habs back into tie for first in East ... parade marshalls on standby pending results of games vs arguably worst and best teams in league this weekend;
• HF29 off to Austin to hang out with techie crowd, rather than cruise University of Texas campus for hotties ... sanity being questioned as we speak;
• Everyone in Canada east of Manitoba curses Mother Nature in advance of ANOTHER F'ING STORM;
• Neither of those had anything to do with hockey, but warranted mentioning.
• All forms of hockey logic would point to a Halak sighting vs Kings this weekend. Look for Price to start again as Carbo throws every single coaching convention out the window.

Bullet Point Bonanza - The Sunday Brunch Game Day Skate & Rangers Game Preview and Open Thread

Bullet points for what you missed while wondering how many bullet points HF29 can bullet into one post:

• So much shit is going down, we're trying to be brief here;
• Pats are perfect;
• This is still a hockey blog;
• For proof, scroll down to read Panger's excellent coverage of Habs draftees playing in the WJC;
• Of course, mere mention of the WJC here may have jinxed Team Canada;
• Leafs have goalie issues, Sean Avery suprisingly not killed by Canadian hockey fans;
• Alex Ovechkin can score goals, and Sens have their own kind of goalie issues;
• You say you like strippers? OK, here you go:

And the Habs bring the road trip to an end with a stopover at LaGuardia. This road trip has been sponsored by Molson and the FHF, bringing you bullet points since earlier in 2007:

• 7 PM start, Madison Square Garden. Is it the last building left with no sponsor? How can I make jokes?
• Pay your cover charge to The Dark Ranger. His avatar scares me;
• Habs are 3-1-1 on the road trip so far, helping to tie the Sens for the most road wins in the East;
• Rangers coming off decent wins against the Canes and the Leafs, and are starting to show their offense;
• Habs have scored 5 goals in 2 straight games for the first time since, I don't know, 1979;
• Hot sexy Habs - I told you, 5 goals in 2 straight, so everyone! Even Michael Ryder!
• Huet and his league-leading .931 save % gets the start again;
• Rhino's broken thumb gonna keep him out 6 weeks minimum, so Streit goes back to D and Chips gets back in the line-up;
• Hot sexy Rangers - keep your eyes on players for hire Shanny and Gomez (who has points in 11 straight games). And feel free to boo Jagr at your TV;
• Lundqvist (2.20 GAA and .915 save%) goes for the Blueshirts;
• Enjoy the game, 'cause Habs don't play again 'til Thursday. Though the FHF are psyched for some outdoor puck.

I'm bulleted out. Let's hear your thoughts in the comments.