For the next few hours, anything is possible - Leafs preview and open thread

Please excuse me while I wax poetic for a while. You know, to classy up the joint a bit. Fuck! Tits! Sorry, just slipped out. Where was I? Ah, hockey. From the frozen ponds of our youth we all have visions of hoisting Lord Stanley's chalice, yet the winds of change MOTHERFUCKING COCKSUCKER. Man, this classy thing is harder than I thought.

OK, I am just going to get straight to the point. The hours before game 1 of the regular season are the greatest time to be a Habs fan. Or even a Leafs fan, for that matter. Though why you would be a Leafs fan is beyond me. These couple of hours are the time where anything is possible. ANYTHING. Where you can convince yourself that the Habs are going to win the Stanley Cup. If all of the following happen:

• Vodkov comes back 100% and plays at least 70 games like the top 5 D-man he is;
• TFS plays 60-70 games as the number one goalie he could be;
• PFK turns in a Calder Trophy performance;
• Squid pots 40+ goals;
• SuperpleXXXe cements himself as one of the best two-way centres in the league;
• We get some consistent secondary scoring from Big Tits;
• CHicken gets stuck in Panger's trunk and is replaced by Lars Eller who goes on to score 25+ goals;
• Gomez and Gio have consistent, 60+ point seasons;
• SpatCHes and Hamr don't trip over their own feet;
• Our 3rd and 4th lines don't embarrass themselves;
• Count Chokula doesn't screw everything up;
• All of these things continue through the playoffs;
• The deal with the Devil comes to fruition.

If all of those things happen, the Habs will win the Stanley Cup. I believe it, and I know you do too. At least for now. These two hours are precious, people, enjoy them while they last. Because at 7 PM from the ACC on CBC, all of our dreams of Stanley Cup glory will most likely get shattered. Or they would be, if we were playing an actual team.

Your "preview" portion of this post is the following - TFS has sufficiently recovered from his flu to start, yet we are without Hamr (knee), Vodkov (knee), and Squid (NHL wheel of justice). The Leafs have an all-new team this year, so I really can't tell you much about them. Except they suck. Maybe PPP can be more informative. GYFHG.

Media whoring post-script - yours truly is on CBC Homerun at 5:10 or so, discussing Visconti's contribution to the Italian film neorealist movement. Or hockey, whichever comes up.