Let me tell you what Melba Toast is packin' right here, all right. We got 4:11 Positrac outback, 750 double pumper, Edelbrock intake, bored over 30, 11 to 1 pop-up pistons, turbo-jet 390 horsepower. We're talkin' some fuckin' muscle ... huh? The game? Alright alright alright, so there was this game last night. It's all fuckin' games, man. All fuckin' games. Like this thing between me and the Jaroman, alright? Like I'm no fat whale, man, just like he's no Dodge Charger drivin', beer swillin', rodeo bustin', Garth Brooks lover like me and Gorges, you know? Man, I love Gorges. I love me them redheads more, but Gorges is cool. He can always get a joint when you need one. Say, man, you got a joint? It'd be a lot cooler if you did. Alright alright alright.Anyway, Pleks, man, he's just doin' what Pleks wants to do man. He and the GIant Mexican Squid? They just keep livin', man. L-I-V-I-N. Nothin' the coach or Rich Peverley or that Russian dude in the other nets could do about that man. Those dudes are alright.Hey, man, did you see that girl behind the net with the really tight Price jersey on? Man, I totally missed that third goal because of that chick, man. Playin' in Montreal is awesome man, with all these friendly young CEGEP girls. That's what I love about these CEGEP girls, man. I get older, they stay the same age. Last year, when me and Higgins and the Tits brothers would fire up a joint and ... what? Game review? Alright alright alright my man. Man, you got more rules than Coach and Gainey. The older I get, the more rules they try to get me to follow. Stop smokin' joints before games. Stop sleepin' with CEGEP girls. Stop the puck. Man, I'm just tryin' to be Carey Price, you know?
Anyway, man, it's alright we lost, you know? 'Cause we're just out there to dog some chicks and smoke some joints, and drink some beer you know? Everyone's all "man, you're so laid-back Price, show some fire" you know? And I'm all "listen man, if Jaro wants to play, let the little dude play, you know?" But that's all right, we'll worry about that later. We need someone to be worryin' about that defence, my man. No Markov, no Rhino ... man, you remember when Rhino scored on his own net? Crazy, man. Coach Carbo was all "man, that ain't right" but you know what? In the end, all it did was cost us a game, man. Just a fuckin' game. Rhino, he's just gonna be the man who keeps on keepin' on, you know?
Game review? Man, you gotta slow down a little about this game review shit, man. It's gettin' tiresome. Alright alright alright where were we? No Markov, no Rhino, no Hal Gill, Carle and Bergeron givin' the puck up like a CEGEP girl on Crescent Street, you know? Listen man, you got a joint? It'd be a lot cooler if you did. I already asked you that? Alright alright alright.
So that game, man, it was some sort of game, you know? Like I saw at least three new Molson Zone girls, man, and they were alright alright alright. I love those Molson Zone girls, man. Anyway, we lost, man and let me tell you this, the older you get the more rules they're gonna try to get you to follow so whatever, man. We'll be better with everyone healthy and doin' their thing, man. I think we're playin' the Bruins next, man. That Lucic dude he's from BC too, alright alright alright. I bet he has a joint.
Aerosmith, 2 weeks. Don't forget.
