Guy Gets His Early Father's Day Gift

No one this pretty could survive jail!

In glorious, yeah-I'm-a-homer-because-Guy-is-the-shit news today, a very wise, awesome judge has decided to allow that paragon of fatherhood St. Guy of Thurso off with a suspended sentence and a $100 fine for doing what any mega-talented, greatest hockey player ever coolest man on earth dad would do for his horrible delinquent scumbag borderline child predator son. Guy lies to the judge, admits he helped his son break curfew to hook up with a child and gets a $100 fine? Was Colin Campbell the judge? If Knuckles Nilan had done this, he'd be looking at life with no parole. The stars do get all the calls in this fucking league.

Sam Pollock, 1925-2007

A sad day for the FHF and Canadiens fans everywhere, as legendary GM Sam Pollock has passed away at the age of 81. Tributes and memories of Sam and the teams he built are going to be plentiful over the next few days, but we would be remiss if we didn't make sure we remembered Sam too. After all, Sam is a big reason why we are all here on FHF.

Other than my Dad, there's probably no one else on this earth who was more responsible for my being a Canadiens fan than Sam Pollock. Growing up as a kid in the 70's in Ontario you had two choices: suffer along with the good-but-never-great Leafs as they began their death spiral under Stafford Smythe and Harold Ballard, or hitch your wagon to one of the other Original Six as the last remnants of the NHL-sponsored junior teams fell by the wayside in towns all over the province. That's how you found Bruins fans in Oshawa, and Chicago fans in St. Catherines, and Rangers fans in Kitchener, and Habs fans in Peterborough and in one little house on Aubrey Street in Bracebridge. My Dad made his choice decades before, and passed his love of Les Canadiens on to me; Sam Pollock was the one who kept the flame burning. Sam's genius made it easy to stay a Canadiens fan in a Leafs town.

Everyone knows the story of how Sam got the 1st overall pick from Oakland to select Guy Lafleur, and how he sent Ralph Backstrom to LA to help the Kings finish above the Seals just in case. That speaks to his genius, his two-steps ahead of everyone else mind. What it doesn't illustrate is Sam's understanding of Montreal, its fans, and the Canadiens legacy. Everyone forgets who went second overall that year; it was a guy named Marcel Dionne. Sam could have easily kept Backstrom, sat on the Seals pick, and ended up with one of Dionne or Lafleur at #2. Dionne finished his career with over 700 goals and 1700 points, a first ballot Hall of Famer and one of the best ever. But Sam wanted Guy, made sure he got Guy, and never looked back. And you know what? Sam made the right choice for his team, his city, and his fans. Sam knew that Dionne, as wonderful a scorer and player as he was, didn't have "it". Rocket had "it". Beliveau had "it". Morenz had "it". Guy had "it", and the Canadiens needed "it". This is no slight on Dionne, who probably would have become the lynchpin of a tremendous Habs team in the 70's and 80's, a perennial Cup contender. But Sam, born and raised in Montreal, knew the pulse and heartbeat of the Canadiens needed a larger than life, lift-you-out-of-your-seat star to remain the Flying Frenchmen hockey fans knew and loved. Dionne was an amazing hockey player, but not an event; Lafleur was. After watching Dionne become a star while Lafleur put up average numbers his first three years, Sam never waivered. He kept building a team and probably sat back and smiled when Lafleur exploded as a superstar and spawned a generation of kids in Canada who wanted to wear #10 and play right wing and fire rockets from the hash marks.

Sam's shrewd talent evaluation and philosophy helped lead hockey out of the dark ages, when the brutish Flyers and Bruins threatened to beat skill and speed right out of the league. He handpicked Scotty Bowman to lead a team that he stocked with stars like Lafleur, Robinson, Shutt, Gainey, and Dryden, plus invaluable soldiers like Tremblay, Wilson, Risebrough, Chartraw, and Nyrop. He won 9 Cups in 14 years. He took a great 1960's Canadiens team and kept it great through the 70's despite expansion, the advent of the draft, and the WHA. He gave older Canadiens fans a reason to keep loving and helped create an entire new generation of fans, including the FHF.

Sam was one-of-a-kind, and Montreal was lucky to have him. La fierté pour toujours, Sam. I'm forever proud to be a fan, thanks to you. RIP.

Brushes with Habness - Ric Nattress

Brushes With Habness is a new feature here on FHF, where we, the FHF, tell you riveting stories about our brushes with Habs and people in the Habs family. Basically, some filler while we wait for the damn season to start.

Yeah, that's right. Ric Nattress.

Now, some of you may remember ol' Ric as a Flame getting railroaded (ahem, ELBOWED) by Mark Messier and making Don Cherry's Rock Em Sock Em tapes as he wobbled back to the bench. You may remember him joining the Leafs as part of the huge Doug Gilmour/Gary Leeman trade, or as Jaime Macoun's stunt double. You may not know that he was a Habs draftee, or that we once got drunk together. But it's true.

Bracebridge, Ontario, summer, mid-1990's. At my buddy's cottage, drinking before hitting the bar. Our friend Rob is meeting us there after finishing up his round of golf ... (insert your own "nice life you rich Ontarians are leading" comment here) but mentions he's bringing along one of his playing partners. Someone's nephew. Some hockey player.

Group mindset at the cottage: "Great, some Junior A dickhead to babysit through the night. Evening ruined as we make sure Mr. Hockey Hotshot doesn't get thrown out a window by locals."

Cottage door swings open. In steps Rob with the very large, very mustachioed, very much older than us hockey player, the recently retired Ric Nattress. Former Leaf, Flyer, Flame, Blue and Canadien Ric Nattress. Much strangeness ensues.

Now, this sort of thing is a little awkward. We all knew who Ric Nattress was, what with most of the guys in the cottage being Leaf fans. And while "Ric Nattress" isn't the first name out of your mouth when someone says "name a former NHL player", he's still a former NHL player. Everyone tried to keep cool as the introductions went around the room, because c'mon, it's Ric Nattress ... but on the other hand, we've all been drinking and it's Ric Freakin Nattress, man!

Turns out, Ric is a great guy. He settled into a chair, had a beer and started answering goofy questions. He showed us a fake Stanley Cup ring he claims he got in 1989 with the Flames (funny, I must have missed that ... can't remember a thing about that year.) He told us about rooming with Guy Lafleur as a rookie, and finding a crate of cigarettes on his bed the day after Guy asked him if he wanted some freebies. He talked about the time Guy was so loaded/hungover at practice no one could stand beside him because of the smell. He told us he thought Messier was the dirtiest player in the league. He forgave my friend Tim (still bitter about the inept Leafs D in the 93' semifinal against the Kings) for continually referring to Jaime Macoun as "JAIME FUCKING MACOUN!!!". And when we got to the bar, beer kept materializing on the table courtesy of the big, friendly mustachioed fella. I think if we had ended up in one of the night-ending brawls our local watering hole was famous for, Ric would have put us all in a bear hug and carried us to safety. Yes, Ric wasn't a Hab for long, but the greatness of Les Glorieux certainly rubbed off on him.

Stay tuned for our next mindless filler edition of Brushes with Habness, as HF29 talks about the time his Dad told him Dave Manson screams like a little girl, or HF10 waxes poetic about seeing John LeClair in a Tim Horton's parking lot.

Jesus, how much longer til the puck drops?

Brushes With Habness: Guy Lafleur's Uncle Part 2 - You Gotta Marinate!

Brushes With Habness is a new feature here on FHF, where we, the FHF, tell you riveting stories about our brushes with Habs and people in the Habs family. Basically, some filler while we wait for the damn season to start.

So yesterday I regaled you with the fine taste of moose meat. But there's more. While the moose was delicious, it was pretty tough. Serious steak knives required. So when Guy Lafleur's uncle asked my dad how the moose was, my dad honestly told him it tasted great, but was a little tough. Well, that was sad news for Guy Lafleur's uncle. He asked my dad how we cooked it. My dad said we threw some spices on it and tossed it on the BBQ. Guy Lafleur's uncle said "Mais non! You have to marinate it!" and proceeded to give my dad many tips on marinating. Then he sent us more steaks to try again. We marinated this time, and the moose was delicious AND tender. Like I said yesterday, true story. You can't make this shit up.

Brushes With Habness - Guy Lafleur's Uncle

Brushes With Habness is a new feature here on FHF, where we, the FHF, tell you riveting stories about our brushes with Habs and people in the Habs family. Basically, some filler while we wait for the damn season to start.

I once ate moose killed by Guy Lafleur's uncle. Seriously. My dad was a doctor, and Guy Lafleur's uncle was one of his patients. After some surgery, Mr. Lafleur gave my dad a present - some moose steaks from a moose he had killed personally. We had some for dinner. It was delicious. True story. You couldn't make this shit up.