I know, blasphemous, sacrilegious, cacao delicious. FHFellow and FHFeline friends of the Habs CHurCH, we are paying today with playoff watCHing penance. Say a couple Hail Careys and throw in a few Our Fathers who art in heaven, wake up the Forum Ghosts for Game 6. Confess FHFers, that was some good hockey until the impure Bruins parted the 2-2 series tie. Stay devoted, still hockey left. Until then, pray, play, sing Olé, Olé, Olé and obey ...
I ~ You shall have no other team but the Montréal Canadiens.
II ~ You shall make yourself a tender idol, in the form of Habs' goalies in heaven, and like Dryden and Roy on earth, you shall bow down to TFS™ in his blue ice and not be jealous of Vézina nominations, you shall not punish him for the inequity of his defense.
III ~ You shall make wrongful use of the name Gomez and always be acquitted.
IV ~ Remember the Stanley Cup and keep it holy, for six games you shall labour and get to game 7, you CHocula, your coaches, your Russian ox, your Mexican donkey, your young livestock, your resident Franco-Ontarion alien, all of you shall work hard and observe what Bob Gainey has CHommanded you and rest only when you raise the silver mug.
V ~ Honour your FHFers and Methers, as the lawyers have CHommanded them to follow you with faith and fear, ice cream and really good scotCH.
VI ~ You shall not kill or murder Horton, Lucic or Marchand but maybe punch them in their ugly face.
VII ~ You shall commit to adult play. Ovenmitts are optional, CHocolate sauce, strawberries and CHampagne aren't.
VIII ~ You shall steal Game 7 and send the Boston sinners to reflect on 40 years of carrying a worthless, fake black and gold cross of don cherry-inspired futility.
IX ~ You shall forever witness fucking false bears at the cbc/hnic.
X ~ Sacrificial Goat, you shall covet thy NHL neighbour's cap space and desire an exchange for your donkey, good luck with that.
SEX ~ Thou shall lick all the CHocolat thy better half has poured, painted, dipped, whipped and stripped on for you, you lucky bunnies.
G Y F Game6 H G !
