Saturday, February 28, 2009
Greetings from the Adirondacks, from this "remote mountain lodge" with high-speed internet and five channels of ESPN. What a time to be alive. So let's take a quick look at tonight's game with one of my patented long-winded run-on paragraphs. The game starts at 7 PM at the Phone Booth, and it's on CBC for viewers in Quebec, Alberta and B.C. The rest of you losers have to suffer through the Sens-Leafs suckfest. Habs have won 3 in a row! [has heart attack]. The Sharks may be good. They've won five of six and lead the league with 93 points. The Chum Bucket is fucking funny. Pleks and Kovy seem to be on their way back to being last year's models, 7 points in 3 and 8 points in 4 respectively. I'm sure I don't need to tell you to keep an eye on Thornton and Marleau for the Sharks. No doubt the Montreal rfaithful will greet Claude Lemieux warmly. Now let's talk special teams. Habs are over 40% on the PP since The Semitic Saviour's arrival (now all the way up to 17th!), and can't seem to find a 5 on 3 PK they can't kill. The Sharks, however, have the 2nd best PP and 6th best PK in the league. Nice combo. Habs going with the exact same lineup as last night, including Jaroslav Allah. Nabokov has the sniffles, so Brian Boucher will be between the stripper poles for the Sharks. How about some Shark Porn for your post-game adult entertainment? It's not what you think.
Go Pants, baby! Except for you Bridget. Then it's Go No Pants.
Friday, February 27, 2009
- Marty Brodeur laughs at your so-called "rust", gets his 99th career shutout in his return;
- Sharks bounce back from their Wings loss and beat the Sens;
- Some Leafs rookie gets the SO winner in his very first game;
- Bruins shutout the Ducks.
So FHF's lineup has been depleted this week. As noted yesterday, Panger is in Hawaii (fuck you Panger), and HF10 has been dealing with some family stuff (good stuff, not bad, so don't worry). And in a couple of hours yours truly is taking off for the weekend, leaving HF4 to mind the store for the killer Philly-Sharks Friday-Saturday double. So to help him out, your game preview is coming a little early today. And as befitting TMS (and the fact that I stil have to pack), you damn well better believe it's in bullet point form...
- 7 PM start in Philly, and it's on TSN;
- Habs have won two in a row! What a streak!
- Philly has taken 7 of 9, and has solidified their hold on that East 4th spot, 4 points up on the Habs with 2 games in hand;
- This is the game that always tears Kristin of eager to go psycho apart, given her dual loyalties;
- Pleks and Markov are your hot Habs. I kind of miss ZombiePleks for some reason;
- Mike Richards has 9 points in his last 4 games;
- We know that The Bratislava Bra is starting, but other than that it's tough to get lineup notes at 7 AM. Most like El Dandy won't play, as he's asked to be traded;
- Danny Brière is expected to come back tonight after missing the last 35 games;
- I can't even think about post-game adult entertainment at this hour. I've heard that there is porn on the internet, maybe you can find some.
Thursday, February 26, 2009
With FHF resident actual hockey expert HFF33akaPanger sunning on the beaches of Hawaii (fuck you Panger), yours truly is forced to write this post. With the trade deadline less than a week away, let's take a quick look at what may or may not happen to some interesting players.
Probably the most likely player to move prior to the deadline. But all of a sudden, the Panthers are actually good and may (will? should?) make the playoffs. We don't know how this affects their decisions about trading the pending UFA.
The Ducks are in salary cap hell, and Pronger's $6.25 mill contract ain't helping matters. With the Ducks sort of meh right now, expect some front-runner to grab Pronger to beef up the blueline.
He'll get traded, but he'll end up a Blue again anyway. It's some crazy Lost time loop thing.
Martin St. Louis / Vinny Lecavalier
Not. Happening. The Bolts have said as much, and the price will be too high anyway. They're here just to rile up Habs fans, or make them drool.
Marian Gaborik's hip
Damaged at the factory, could be available at a big discount.
Doug Weight / Bill Guerin
Let the Annual Pillaging of the Isles begin!
The Tronna Maple Leaves
Kaberle! Antropov! Kubina! Everything must go!
Let's hear your trade thoughts in the comments or I'll get Bob Mackenzie to sit on you.
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
- Who smells goalie controversy? Jaro's 34 saves lead the way in a 3-0 Habs win. Habs were totally outplayed especially in the 2nd and 3rd, but we'll save the recriminations for later;
- Philly proves they are a force in the East with a 4-2 win over the Caps;
- The Sens take care of the Canes 4-2;
- B's bring the Panthers back to Earth with a 6-1 win;
- Souray bags a pair in the Oilers' 5-3 win over the Bolts.
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
The game wherein Montreal fans warmly welcome Mats Sundin with a polite round of applause - Canucks Game Preview and Open Thread
- 7:30 PM start at the Phone Booth. It seems to be on Sportsnet Pacific, meaning it's probably blacked out everywhere but BC and Alberta;
- Habs have won... one in a row! Canucks, after sucking big-time when Mats got there, have gone on a tear, winning 8 of 9 games and jumping from 11th to 5th in the West;
- Canucks beat the Habs 4-2 on the Habs' recent Western swing;
- Orland Kurtenblog is your source for all things Canucks and beyond;
- Kovy is coming off his best game of the season, and Pleks and Big Tits are riding with him. The Semitic Saviour and Markov are scoring points, while the latter's defensive coverage has been, er, not good;
- The Sedins are scoring (big surprise) and Mats has a point per game over the Canucks' good stretch;
- Halak will get the start again after his 44 saves on Saturday. Carey who?
- We thought Tangy was oh so close to returning, but after meeting with doctors he's still out a week or two. And in case you missed it, Franky B is out for at least 2 weeks;
- For your post-game adult entertainment, in tribute one last time to Mats, enjoy the Swedish Department of Sex (seriously NSFW).
Monday, February 23, 2009
Kovy may have saved Carbo's ass on Saturday.
Sunday, February 22, 2009
Not sure if we'll have a real game review at some point on this lazy Sunday. I just wanted to give two quick impressions from the Bell Centre yesterday, and they're both Kovy-related. The building was fucking dead at the start of the game. One exception - when Kovy was introduced on the scoreboard during the player intros. You'd have thought The Rocket (who Kovy gets paired with on the scoreboard) himself had come back.
And talk all you want about Kovy's killer pass to Pleks (0:14 mark) or his steal-and-bury-it goal (0:40), but I will always remember the play that didn't make this 5 minute highlight reel. Kovy on the PK, diving to clear the puck from the zone. I have a tear in my eye just thinking about it.
Combine Kovy's performance with the Semitic Saviour of the Power Play, and Bob is looking like a frakking genius.
Saturday, February 21, 2009
- 3 PM start at the Bell Centre, on CBC as mentioned;
- Habs have taken all 3 games from the Sens this year. Jinx!
- Habs are fighting for their playoff lives, while Ottawa is now at the top of the East also-rans, and there may still yet be hope, especially as they've gone 5-2-2 with the new coach;
- With our eternal man-love for internet BFF SLC of Five for Smiting, we often omit other great Sens bloggers, like the artist formerly known as Sherry and DHS over at Scarlett Ice;
- Kovy will be back on the ice, with the all of a sudden hot Mob-lover Big Tits (5 points over the last 2 games) and Pleks (4 in 2);
- Jaro will get the start;
- At 7:30 in the morning it's hard to find out any other line up notes. Update these yourself in the comments, okay?
- Will Tangy ever play again? And Alfie is out thanks to a puck to the face;
- For your post-game adult entertainment, thank the Sens for (re-)acquiring Mike Comrie, giving them a 1-2 WAG punch of Hillary Duff and Carrie Underwood that any team in any league would kill for (lap dance to gillis for pointing that out).
Friday, February 20, 2009
Hockey Players Like to Make Love to Beautiful Women and Lose to the Pittsburgh Penguins : Pens 5 - Habs 4
We don't even know where to start with this. We should mention the Habs lost last night, a 5-4 entertaining affair in Pittsburgh. Habs finish the road trip 1-4-1. Ugh. But all of that is secondary to the "big story" this morning.
Apparently the Tits brothers (and to a lesser extent, the Hamr) have been palling around with a drug dealer just arrested last week. Pasquale Mangiola - get used to that name, you'll be hearing it alot over the days to come - bought cars and apartments for the brothers, and arranged for some, er, companionship. The gang and the Hamr were seen in bars together. Oooh, juicy!
All sorts of rumours about half the team being on coke and that's why we suck, but we'll just shut up about that. We're a quality news source here! Bwahahahaha. Anyway, much more to come as this all plays out.
Thursday, February 19, 2009
- 7 PM start, on the CBC for some reason (oh, we're playing Sid, there's your reason);
- Carbo is going with the same line up as last night, including TFS;
- CJAD reports Carbo told the media they were a bunch of idiots for all the Kovy BS (I'm paraphrasing), and RDS says Kovy is all good and will be back practicing with the team tomorrow, after RDS stirred the pot yesterday with a bunch of stories from Russia. Wait, what?
- All hail The Semitic Saviour of the Power Play, and TFS' old goalie pads;
- The Flower thinks the Habs suck, and Bob was a dick to Kovy, and Carbo can't coach;
- Crosby, Malkin, you know the deal;
- Dan Bylsma makes his home coaching debut for the Pens.
When is a loss not a loss?
Well, never, actually. A loss is a loss and it fucking sucks. Last night's loss sucked. Unless you want to get into the Tavares/Hedman sweepstakes, losses are never, ever good (and even then, what kind of torture is it to rationalize losses? Tell me Islander fans didn't have some mixed emotions about losing to the Rangers last night.)
However, there are some losses that are more palatable than others. For instance, when your previously dead-man-walking team goes toe-to-toe with the reigning MVP Ovie, the world's scariest defender/rover/goalscoring blueline menace Mike Green, and the rest of the Caps offensive machine, and when your previously maligned "number 1 centre" plays out of his turtleneck, and when your franchise goalie starts to resemble the player drafted fifth overall, not the sieve of the past month, a loss is a little more tolerable.
Of course, the punch in the stomach way they lost still made me unleash a string of expletives on Whats-his-name Steckel and his epileptic ostrich goal celebration. Fucking Steckel. Sounds like the villain in a Vince Vaughan/Will Ferrell movie.
The Sky is Falling: Well, they still lost. They are still in a horrendous slump. They still gave up a lead with less than five minutes to go. Markov and DOOM still looked terrible for most of the night, and there still wasn't much to talk about 5 on 5. Price sucked horribly in the shootout, which at one point was supposed to be automatic points for the Habs. Mad Max did not look like he was playing at Mad Maximum Speed ... perhaps he was gearing up to face old QMJHL enemy Sidney Crosby tonight. I do find it interesting when a game like that out of Max disappoints. That kid has made a tremendous leap, I tells ya, because the game he played was still pretty damn good.
Plan the Parade: Har har de har har. Good one. Still ...
The Caps have only lost 4 times at home this year. They might be the fastest, slickest team in the league, and Ovie, Semin, Backstrom and Green are terrifyingly good. The Habs didn't play intimidated, weathered all sorts of storms, and had a chance to beat one of the top three teams in the East on the road. Price was outstanding for long stretches. Can you imagine what the score would have been if "last week Carey" was in nets? He got beat by a piece of magic from the best player in the world and the tying goal was a deflection he never saw. One game does not indicate that TFS has returned, but it sure is encouraging. Pleks looked like the Canadiens best player ... an inch to the right and his shot off the post is a game winner. Higgins scored. CHRIS HIGGINS. Oh, and Mathieu Schneider made Bob look like a genius for at least one night; 3 power play goals, with Schneider and Markov instrumental in all of them.
No Lap Dances, because if all the rumours are true, all the young guys on this team are partying too much already. Except Josh Gorges, who I believe is working up the courage to ask a girl down to the malt shoppe and just might hold her hand! (You go, tiger!) Provisional Lap Dance* for Bob for the Schneider trade being a smashing opening night success. Provisional Lap Dance* to Kovy improving this team by getting his disruptive dipsy-doodling ass sent home.
Penguins ce soir. More on that later, if 29 can stop talking about Lost.
* Provisional Lap Dances can be revoked, suspended, or turned into Provisional Bricks through the Condo Window at a freakin' moments notice. Hey, we're irrational Habs fans. We love you, but fuck you too, just in case.
- Even though the Habs lost, that might have been the beginning of something better? Of course we were watching Lost, but by all accounts the Habs played a full game of hockey last night, only to lose in the SO. Hey, you know who might have helped in the shootout? Kovy. We're just saying. Oh and Ovie had some miracle goal. More later no doubt;
- Rangers stopped their own bleeding with a win over the Isles;
- The Columbus Blue Jackets are hot baby! Their win over the Blues put them in 5th in the West and 6 games over .500 for the first time in their history. Woohoo! This three sentence bullet points fulfills our West quota for the week.
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
Waiting to enter the numbers - 7:30 PM start in Washington. Available on TSN. Caps have taken two of three this year, including the Theo shutout I remember all too well. Habs have Lost 15 of their last 16 (or thereabouts).
The Others - I don't think I need to introduce you to A View from the Cheap Seats anymore. We all know CapsChick rules.
Hot like the Swan Station imploding - Captain K is playing OK. The rest of the team blows. Though I didn't see much of the West Caost trip, maybe we have some good players? Hahahaha.
Frozen like the wheel below the Orchid - Many, many players. TFS especially, who's getting the start. Let's hope Carbo hasn't scarred him forever, and his new old pads help.
As old as Richard Alpert - Mathieu Schneider makes his version 2.0 debut for the Habs.
Hot like Sawyer and Kate doing it in a cage - Ovie, Semin, Backstrom, Green. Like this is news?
Cold like Jeremy Bentham's body - Caps are good. No one here.
I don't know what the fuck is going on either - RDS has the following lineup. Try to keep track:
Markov-The Semitic Saviour
The Dharma Initiative makes porn is your post-game adult entertainment (nsfw-ish, but not really).
Apologies to all the non-Lost watchers out there. Let me have it in the comments, I can take it; I'm tough like Ben.
- Sabres beat the Leafs, and the Panthers beat the Devils, creating an epic clusterfuck from 5-8 in the East standings;
- Sens finally lose one, though still get a point;
- B's snap their losing streak;
- Vancouver heating up.
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
That'll cure him. Plan the parade kids.
Bob tweaks while Rome burns. We need a major move already, especially after the Capitals beat us 8-1. Oh, that hasn't happened yet? Sorry.
- Sens win fifth in a row. Remember last year when the Sens collapsed down the stretch while the Habs surged? Good times;
- Pens new boss same as the old boss;
- Hey, we may have found a team falling apart more than the Habs - the Rangers.
Monday, February 16, 2009
The Jews are back on our bench! The Jews are back on our bench!
Stir the Matzah Ball Soup Ma! Curl up and watch When Harry Met Sally for the 17th time. Rattle off those Jewish Nobel Prize Winners again, cause THIS IS HAPPENING!
Mathieu Schneider is back.
Kovy the Kancer sucked, and needs to be traded - or treated with chemotherapy to ensure his attitude doesn't spread to healthy parts of the "team", whatever they may be. Captain K sucked - yeah I said it. HF10's Boy Higgins sucked. Bit Tits, despite the goal, and Little Tits both sucked (well, except if you're Pierre Houde - go watch HF4's TV in the post below). My Boy Chips sucked, especially on faceoffs - you're a centre now, jackass! Mad Max sucked for not growing out his hair again a la Samson (yes, that's a Bible reference. Darwin most certainly does not suck, though). LaWreck sucked for not kicking someone's ass. HF29's boy DOOM sucked (and if he's injured, he sucked for not sitting). Markov really sucked. Cube and Hamr sucked. Price sucked for ... uh ... not getting any good shots to stop? (OK that's just a "retroactive suck" for the Edmonton and Boston games.) Pleks sucked for getting suspended from playing. Tangy and Guimauve sucked for not getting better already.
So who does that leave? Two rookies (Patches and D'ago), a guy locked in my truck (Breezer - yeah, I said it) and two guys who were healthy scratches when the "team" didn't suck (Greek Lightening and El Dandy). And Jaro - well, don't think I'm going to be pointing any fingers at the goalies when the "team" in front of him have given up like 100 shots in the last 7 periods. (I put "team" in quotes because they're really 18 individual skaters right now.)
We suck. So what do we do? Trade 'em all and fire Carbonneau. Riot in the streets if Gainey doesn't trade for Lecavalier, Boumeester and Terry Sawchuk's ghost. Remember that Ottawa - Ottawa - has won 4 in a row under a new coach and feel shame. Declare 2009 "Most Sucky Centennial Season Ever."
[Forget that San Jose and Boston are both currently sucking, and that there is plenty of time to stop sucking before the playoffs. Perspective? Not at FHF. Panic rulz!]
Tell is what you think sucks in the comments. Personally, I think coming into work on a holiday sucks.
...oh, and this review sucked, too.
- Let us all remember the FHF weekend of supermodels fondly. That streak didn't last. Habs suck, yada yada, fire the coach, yada yada. This team deserves none of our creativity after a 4-2 loss to the Canucks;
- Pens got the "pre-season East favourites who failed to live up to expectations and may miss the playoffs so we're firing the coach" ball rolling yesterday with the sacking of Michel Therrien;
- Ovie has a hat trick in a 4-2 win over the Panthers;
- Beware the Devils, who beat the Sharks 6-5.
Sunday, February 15, 2009
The beauty of the current streak (supermodels and quickie previews) is that it's like, zero work for me! 10 PM EST start. Habs have not beaten Vancouver since 2003. Jaro gets rewarded with another start, ruining TFS' B.C. homecoming. Other than that, I have no lineup news yet. Make sure to boo or throw things at the TV when you see Mats. Or cheer. Or drink heavily. Your call.
Let's hear predictions on Habs-Canucks fans split tonight in the comnments. 50-50?
Saturday, February 14, 2009
The win was no doubt due to our posting of Bar Refaeli for the open thread. So dammit, we're posting supermodels til we lose. Of all the streaks we've had at FHF, let's hope this one lasts a long time. Mmm, Brooklyn Decker.
And one other note - many lap dances to FHF regular Baroque for giving us a new link for the Interwebs quotes in the sidebar. Canada's National Newspaper has taken notice. Next stop, the Moose Jaw Times Herald.
Friday, February 13, 2009
Go read HF10's Ten Things to Hate in the next post to psyche you up for the game, and Go Pants. I don't have the faith or the balls to write Go Habs.
Let's hear your fave all-time SI Swimsuit cover model in the comments. For you kids, you should know they used to have these things called "magazines" which were made of paper and had, like, stories and pictures and stuff. And SI put hot women in bikinis on the cover once a year. Now get off my lawn.
9. Colorado Avalanche sounds like a goddamn MLS name. The Avalanche and Lightning need to go. Now.
8. Pierre Lacroix, the smug, pompous, agent-turned GM who slimed and sleazed his way into a stunning run of success and then slinked away to become Avs president just before the wheels came off. His every press conference made me want to take a shower.
7. Colour scheme? Terrible. Jerseys? Ugly. Logo? Uninspired. Bigfoot print? Pointless. The one time they almost got the jerseys right, they just copied the Rangers ... and then they promptly stopped using them.
5. The Hit and the stupid, overblown rivalry that resulted. You would have thought that Detroit-Colorado was the first and only rivalry in hockey history the way it got discussed. Claude Lemieux was, is, and will always be a prick, former Hab or not.
3. The appalling lack of respect for the origins of the franchise. You reissued the retired numbers of Peter Stastny, Michel Goulet, Marc Tardif and JC Tremblay, but the stellar, monumental, 128 game (including playoffs) Avalanche career of Ray Bourque warrants a place in the rafters? What a slap in the face to the Nords, their fans, and to the actual Avalanche legends who should one day rightfully go to the rafters, (Joe Sakic & Peter Forsberg, for instance). [For the record, the Hurricanes have also neglected their heritage in this way; of the relocated WHA teams, only the Coyotes continue to honour the Jets retired numbers. So Carolina sucks too. We'll get to them someday.]
2. Trading for and winning a Cup with Bourque drove me crazy, but what made it worse was the year-long "16W" campaign, making it seem like it would be a Shakespearean tragedy if poor widdle Ray retired Cupless. Listen, no one has a divine right to get their name on the Stanley Cup. Plenty of superstar players went their entire careers without winning a Cup. The whole "win one for Ray" crap was so overblown and nauseating I actually cheered for the fucking Devils in that final. Fucking Lou Lamariello and the Devils, people. Think about that.
1. If you aren't sure what I would hate most about the Colorado Avalanche, you're on the wrong site.
- Sens win 3rd straight, will catch Habs in the standings any day now;
- Leafs lose, will catch Habs in the standings any day now;
- Florida thumps the 'Canes 5-0, and seriously this time, will catch the Habs in the standings any day now;
- Kipper was brilliant in leading the Flames to a 2-o shutout over the Kings;
- Pleks gets 2 games for slew footing Grebeshkov in the Oilers game. I don't know what slew footing is. It sounds sort of sexy, if maybe Bar Rafaeli was doing it.
Thursday, February 12, 2009
Let's hear how bad the Habs suck in the comments....again.
On the plus side, I just read through the game thread and was quite amused. Well done kids - you're all much funnier when we're losing.
Wednesday, February 11, 2009
Fortunately, yesterday Guy Lafleur spoke to RDS about the Habs', er, difficulties, and he knows what's wrong! He knows how to fix it! Remain calm, all is well! As is our custom, we happily translate Guy's comments for those unfamiliar with the language of
"Le leadership commence au septième étage et descend jusque dans le vestiaire"
This ship is totally rudderless, and we are totally screwed.
"Selon moi, il y a des cliques dans cette équipe-là"
This team is not playing together and they seem to be fragmented. What they really need is a night out at the disco together.
"Si ces joueurs sont incapables de produire et d’aider l'équipe et bien qu'on les change."
Trade Kovy right fucking now.
"On peut les remplacer par ces joueurs dans les mineures qui veulent jouer et qui donneront leur 100% pour gagner le match"
Seriously, Kovy is giving like 15% out there. Back in my day, sure I gave only 15% on some days (mainly when I was hungover), but I had the team to cover for me. That Tremblay prick did whatever I told him.
(re the possibility the Habs will slip out of a playoff spot) "Il ne faut pas y penser!"
I'm freaking out at the thought. Can I bum a smoke?
- Florida beats T-dot 5-4, tightens East 4-10 clusterfuck. Are Habs in 10th yet?
- Sharks beat the B's 5-2 in a clash of actual good hockey teams;
- Paul Kariya is out for the year after hip surgery. Wait, Paul Kariya still plays in the NHL?
- Habs go bowling, get drunk and then go get hookers. Hey, whatever works.
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
It has been 2 years less 16 days since I moved to Calgary.
What a wonderful city...no curbside recycling...the size of your engine is heavily valued over our children's future...public transportation is a joke, partly because so many people refuse to stand "too close" to their neighbour on the C-Train...snow removal is done by one dude in a F-150...downtown is deader than Elvis after 6pm...everything is at least a 20-minute drive away and you can't even get around without a vehicle...and due to wonderful economic planning, the bottom is about to drop out of the economy while huge infrastructure costs remain since no one is willing to pay any taxes - especially Big Alberta Oil.
So maybe I should take Flames' fans advice and "go back to Montreal" since I'm a Habs fan, although I now make this city my home, sometimes to my chagrin. I'm also apparently "gay" since I like the Habs, as I fund out when the turned "Oley" into "You're Gay" (probably news to Mrs. Panger who was the entire reason I moved here). Wonderfully original heckling Flames Fan - both sophomoric and discriminatory. In thier defense, I suppose it's difficult to be clever when all you do is go on beer runs and yell at the other teams fans while virtually ignoring the ice.
What made this game especially bitter is that the early going was great - the walk down 17th Ave (aka the Red Mile) to the Saddledome with 20 Habs fans singing and cheering while cars and buses honked their support. The atmosphere before the game was electric. Watching warm-up with the 60% Habs fans from the second row, all of us desperate to see our boys in person for the first time in years, was unforgettable. The Habs crowd chanting Go Habs Go while the rest of the crowd countered with Go Fames Go was special. I especially enjoyed talking to the non-asshole Flames fan sitting next to me throughout the game.
Losing I could have lived with - although not happily - just seeing my Canadiens in my city for the first time. Hanging out with fellow Habs Fans in Calgary* (*TM FHF commentator Bryan Driscoll's Facebook group), including the said Mr. Driscoll (thanks again for the ticket buddy!).
Make no mistake: the Flames kicked the Habs ass. Two SH goals. Halak was weak. The Flames seemed the only team feeling an urgency to win. Kovalev was absolutely invisible. Even at the end of the first with MTL up 2-1, the sneaking suspicion that the Habs were in for another "L" was nagging. There is such a thing as losing with class, which too many Flames Fans don't seem to understand or care about.
OK, so I know that every segment of a fan base has it's asshole contingent, but last night's game was ruined not by the Habs play but by the aforementioned assholes. I guess it was my fault for expecting more, but reminded me why I would never cheer for the Flames - straight or gay.
I guess stealing anther city's franchise and winning one Stanley Cup in your entire history gives you the right to belittle the history and tradition of the flagship franchise of the NHL - and a Canadian cousin, no less. Oh yes, I forgot: Quebec isn't really in Canada. (I guess I should have added "no understanding of or familiarity with Canadian history or politics" to the second paragraph).
Well done Flames Fan, well done. Oh, and congratulations on the win.
Monday, February 09, 2009
Habs are totally fucking lame anyway. Losers of 7 grams out of their last 9? No way! And I heard the Flames are sucky too, losers of 4 straight. On the plus side, the Habs players look totally baked out there! Kovy's floating around in la-la land like he totally got into the chronic. And that Jesus kid is staring right through the puck as the puck goes right through him. I want some of that icky!
So me and Woody were hanging out on the bus. He tells me the Habs would totally improve their play with some hemp unis. And help save the environment! That's like, win-win! Unlike the IRS. That's totally lose-lose.
Say hi to FHF cats Panger and Bryan who will be chillin' at the Saddledome tonight. That building's shape is freaky. What's it shaped like anyway?
Sunday, February 08, 2009
Saturday, February 07, 2009
Your preview is Jaro starts and I agree with HFF33, Habs Suck. Panger, on the other hand, is an idiot.
/insert Michael Buffer "let's get ready to rumble!" here
That pretty much sums up last night's game.
Friday, February 06, 2009
Waiting in line details - 7:30 PM start HSBC arena. Game is on TSN so we can all avoid Benoit. Sabres are coming off a nice 5-0 win over the Leafs, and are a mere 5 points behind the Habs in the standings. Uh-oh. Habs have won the last two against Buffalo.
Pay your cover charge to - Top Shelf... where Mama hides the cookies turns the best goal call into the best blog name.
Hot Habs to watch - Hmm. The reunited Danse à Dix line came back to life a bit in the last game. They may be ready to break out (crosses fingers, sacrifices chicken blood to deity). The Hamr is becoming an offensive force lately.
Skanky Habs to watch - anyone worried about TFS? I'm just asking.
Hot sexy Sabres to watch - Vanek has 13 points over his last 8 games. Tim Connolly has 8 goals over that same span. Ryan Miller has the gaudy line of 2-0-0, 0.00, 1.000 in his last 2 GP. Alrighty then.
Skanky Sabres to watch - unlike Miller, Lalime has a 0-2-0, 3.53, .887 line in his last 2 GP. Let's hope he's the starter.
Line up du jour - BGL is in. El Dandy, while ready, won't play tonight. Breezer did not go to Buffalo (couldn't get out of Panger's trunk in time) so we assume that means Rhino plays.
Post-game adult entertainment - enjoy a gallery of sexy waitresses serving Buffalo wings.
Do you like your Buffalo wings with blue cheese dressing? Discuss. Oh, you can talk hockey too.
- Well give Ottawa credit, they managed to at least take a point off the B's which is something the Habs couldn't do last time. 4-3 (SO).
- Panthers continue to battle for 8th, beat the Isles 3-2. Watch the highlights - Zednik does this little hurdle thing on the way to a highlight reel goal, it's pretty cool;
- Ovie gets his 200th career goal (already? fuck he's good) but the Caps lose.
Thursday, February 05, 2009
So with an actual game tomorrow, Sexy Friday has been bumped up to Thursday. Or you're just time-traveling à la Lost.
Above is a new commercial for the Nashville Predators. The Preds have enlisted the help of sexy jail bait country singer Taylor Swift to help sell tickets. Not a bad little commercial. I like the whole country - Nashville connection, though frankly Taylor looks like someone's little sister in the spot and not particularly sexy. But she was #57 on Maxim's Hot 100 last year. For a much more Sexy Thursday-worthy Taylor, enjoy this video of her with Def Leppard singing Pour Some Sugar on Me. Thank you Taylor, I believe I would like to do just that.
Lap dance to Forechecker over at On the Forecheck. Sexy Thursday is based on Sexy Friday, which as always is copyright KSK
Wednesday, February 04, 2009
If there's one thing someone could teach a Penguin, it's balance. The penguin demeanor is one of awkward shuffling. A penguin often looks like a man rushing out of the toilet with his pants down to his ankles as he darts to a nearby room to get some reading material.