Monday, August 01, 2011

Tweet this bitCHes for 08/01


Habs have 5th-best goalie; pic via official Habs tat gallery. #augustbitchesmaybewe'regettingclose

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Congrats to Mr. and Mrs. PatCHes.

25 comments:

Steve said...

TFS is way ahead of Lou, Lou should not be top ten, and where is the Leafs new Jonny Bauer, yep its been that long since they had a goalie.

HabsFan29 said...

I hereby declare this the quietest day in FHF history

Steve said...

Its cowboys and people without visa's or war criminals, or bad people her to shoot you, rape and kill your children and dog, and then burn your house down.

VTHABSFAN said...

Patches married? Head injury was worse than I feared.

Moey said...

Hmm, not crazy about that frou frou wedding dress. That's all I've got.

Number31 said...

Just checking that none of you have met a falling concrete slab. High fives for surviving another day in Montreal. WOO!

juce said...

Fuck the Broons, I've been tuning in for quite some time, just want to say I LOVE YOU ALL except that broons guy you let in from time to time!
I'm a little tech challenged.....maybe even mentally!!!
Rgards,
Juce

juce said...

Just testing the waters....Leaf suck...

VTHABSFAN
YOU ARE SO RIGHT!!!
I'm afraid he will never recover!

Do I need to do this word verification each time?
I'm desperate for hockey to start!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

soperman said...

Yesterday was Natal Day in Halifax and phucking Brad Marchand was the grand marshall of the parade. dickwad. (Is it dickwad or dick-wad?) They should have taken him down in one of those rusty submarines that will collapse if it goes deeper than 50'.

Fortunately, I was down at the cottage drinking beers by the lake rather than being in the same city as that moron.

Steve said...

I have two solutions for Montreal infrastructure problem, send Gomez to Hamilton to study how they do it, and put Chocula in charge of construction and play a concrete possession game.

And guess what Buttman, another NHL franchise is on the brink, yep the Islanders latest candidates for good old Canadian corporate welfare.

the Maritimer said...

@soperman, I understand not wanting to be anywhere near that ugly little fuckface, but man, a rotten tomato to the side of his head might have been tempting...

Glad your enjoying the cottage, we've had great weather down here in the Maritimes this summer. In about two weeks though that familiar chill will start to appear from time to time, then we can start thinking about hockey.

Go Habs! Go Sea Dogs!

Steve said...


Oprah
has this great new contest to locate the quintessential Canadian, even though I don't live in Montreal I faked an entry, since I am sure to win, first one who want to claim my AKA gets to host the person who evenhandedly has dumbed down America to the point of no return.


Dear Oprah,
I start the morning in bed with my American designed Chinese slave labour manufactured Ipad. My homepage is the FHF website. I peruse the Sherwoods and then knock some more plaster off the ceiling with my harder than Scott Gomez’s shot. Canadians are not wasteful like Mericans, so I smoke the roach from last nights last joint before having a stand up piss. I don’t wash my hands because Canadians don’t pee on their hands. My beautiful French Canadian wife who makes Kim Kardashian look like a photo shopped hooker who just did the football team is making me coffee and pemail bacon and eggs. I eat about a half a pound, and two eggs, then bang my beauty as she does the morning dishes. A little tired from my morning exertion I hot knife some meth. I check FHF for Sherwood updates then go down to the basement, yes Canadians realized they are not making any more real estate and dug holes under their home in which all kinds of great things can occur. Like banging your wife in the laundry room, or a great dark place for the 50 inch. As a typical Canadian I have a grow op. After clipping and testing I go off to work as one of Montreal’s many dedicated construction workers. I climb into the company pickup and adjust my attitude for the workday then pull into the nearby gas station to buy beer. The rest of the morning is spent mostly picking random spots with my mates, drilling a small hole filling it with dynamite and then putting up barriers and detour signs around the crater. Soon its lunch time and we head off to the Canadian ballet to watch Russian and Romanian employees of Hells Angels do high culture and rub themselves in a most unhygienic fashion on us. A rub and a tug later and we all need another meth boost. Next we establish a table and drink beer and argue about hockey until its time to go home.
Arriving home the wife has ordered a delicious pizza and is lying on the couch naked with the pie strategically placed just waiting for me to satiate my appetite after a busy day. We will then go to some pirate website and watch some HBO because in Canada we are incapable of creating TV worth watching.
And Oprah I would rather go for a week without Sex and Drugs than watch anything as stupid as the shit you create.

Moey said...

Steve, fucking brilliant man. And you're right her OWN network is a pile of horseshit.

HabsLaughs said...

Potential Nickname for Budaj: Budajlicious. We are not ready for his jelly

moeman said...

Steve 4 PM.

Steve said...

@Moeman, what a rebuttal, the FBI, the CIA, an Apple lawsuit, what?

BTW, I forgot to mention, the wife, she paints the bedroom ceiling every day, tabernac!

soperman said...

@ the maritimer.

It wouldn't be worth the ulcers, but it would be funny to see someone punch him in the face about a hundred times and then explain, "Well no one stopped me, so I just kept hitting him."

Yeah, summer is pretty short down here.

HabsFan29 said...

I declare Steve's Oprah letter the winner of the internet today!

moeman said...

I put the butt in rebuttal.

moeman said...

Find the Habs;

http://www.hockeycanada.ca/index.php/ci_id/170658/la_id/1.htm

Steve said...

The link to Oprah was broke, so I blew it up.

moeman said...

Should I stay or should I go, in a PatCHes jersey?

Ottawa — c’est-à-dire, l’Université d’Ottawa — reçoit la coupe Stanley. Soyez-y!

Le vendredi 5 août à 10 h, Peter Chiarelli, directeur général des Bruins de Boston et diplômé de l’Université, apportera la vénérée coupe sur la pelouse du pavillon Tabaret (550, rue Cumberland). Ne manquez pas cette chance de poser en compagnie de la coupe et de combler le champion ou la championne en vous! Notre sport national à l’Université canadienne — qui dit mieux? Pas besoin d’attendre le printemps pour votre prochaine dose de coupe Stanley… c’est un rendez-vous!

Quoi : La coupe Stanley sur le campus de l’Université d’Ottawa

Quand : Le vendredi 5 août 2011 à 10 h

Où : Pelouse du pavillon Tabaret (550, rue Cumberland)





The Stanley Cup is coming to Ottawa—to the University of Ottawa, that is. And you’re invited.

On Friday, August 5, at 10 a.m., Peter Chiarelli, general manager of the Stanley Cup champion Boston Bruins and uOttawa alumnus, will be bringing the coveted chalice to the front lawn of Tabaret Hall, 550 Cumberland. Don’t miss this chance to be photographed with the Cup, and feel like a bit of a champion yourself. Canada’s university and Canada’s game—it doesn’t get any better than this. So why wait for next spring to get your Stanley Cup fix? See you at uOttawa.

What: The Stanley Cup on the university of Ottawa campus

When: Friday, August 5, 2011 at 10 a.m.

Where: Front lawn of Tabaret Hall, 550 Cumberland

Number31 said...

Do it moeman. Wear the PatCHes' jersey for great justice!

soperman said...

Yes, moe, do it for PatCHes.

Does this mean the shaved gorilla will take it back to the zoo where he was born.

moeman said...

OK, I don't have a PatCHes jersey but the Habs presence will be felt. KYP kids.