The Morning Skate tries to figure out the Habs Defense for Thursday, June 30

Bullet points for what you missed while dreaming of the Pope Tweeting...

• OK let's see if we can keep track of the Habs D here. Yesterday the following happened: Hamr refused the Habs offer, the Habs traded CHeez Whiz' rights to the BJs for a 7th round pick which becomes a 5th rounder if he actually signs, and Swiss Mister II signed a $1.7 million 2-year deal. So we guess this leaves us with: Vodkov, Gorges, PFK, Gill, SpatCHes, (Y)Emelin and SMII. Sound about right? Everyone start praying for Vodkov's knees right now;
• CHeez Whiz pens his goodbye to Montreal;
• Goodbye and good luck Paul Kariya. Always a class guy who suffered through a lot of shit;
• Anyone in the market for a Chirs Drury?
• Rollie the Goalie squeezes out another $3 million from his 41-year old body;
• The NHLPA has called shenanigans on the Predators for not offering their RFA's contracts;
• Jagr has gone missing or something.

Whew, deep breath. Tomorrow is Free Agent Frenzy Big Fat Bob Mckenzie Day, and we have heard rumours of Panger blogging actual hockey stuff. So that means Sexy Friday may be bumped. But moe found a new vid of FHF fave Kate Upton that just won't wait til next week, so we present, uh, Titty Thursday?

Shlemiel, shlemazal... I'm moving to Milwaukee!

I've got my pills and my bowling ball and I'm taking a road trip!

Aufiderzein Habs.

Go, uh, Admirals!

Trifuckta ~ 3 of 4 of the 2011 NHL HHoFers scrapped the bottom of the blue&white barrel

Congrats to the inductees.

You to Mark HowedidyougetinbeforeCarbo?.

Get ready for incessant CotU mediots yipping 

"they-played-for-da-leaf!!!".

Also, let's all remember who actually won in 1993

and of course the best Gilmour-as-a-Hab memory.

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Dougie's babysitter sends in a pic, just for him.

The Morning Skate says goodbye to an old poultry friend for Tuesday, June 28th

Oh Giant Mexican CHicken, we hardly knew ye

Bullet points for what you missed while dreaming of getting some mail again...

• So the Habs did not extend qualifying offers to RFA's Tom "Tommy" Pyatt, Alex "Captain" Picard and of course, Benoit "Benny the CHicken" Pouliot, thus relegating the Giant Mexican CHicken line to our happy memories of the 3 games they kicked ass together. Now, technically, the Habs could still land these players after July 1 when no one wants them, though not giving an offer is a likely sign they don't give a shit about any of them. Adios guys;
• Mad Max manages to squeeze $2 million for 2 years out of the Nucks;
• Kevin Bieksa also gets cash from the Nucks, 5 years and $23M;
• Lap dance to GG11 for shooting us this video of Kirk being introduced to the Predators organization (jump to the 7:55 mark). The amount of times he gets called "Kurt" is comedy gold. Sad, pathetic, comedy gold;
• PHucktards continue their makeover by trade;
• If you think the return of TMS is an excuse to link to my True Blood review, you are correct, sir or madam.

Have a nice day.

Tweet this bitCHes for 06/27

Goodbye Kirk? Realignment? Smyth always 'n 4ever an Oiler; #seriouslyifthisisgoodbyekirkimaycry

Bienvenue, Anglophone FrenCH Guy! ( ... + )

With the 17th pick yesterday, the Habs took Nathan Beaulieu, an Ontarian whose dad is French but as this scouting report video proves, is as anglo as they come. He did play in the Q, so that's something for RDS. Though it was for one of those Maritime teams, so there's that. RDS may be confused this morning.

On the hockey side of things, by all accounts this was a good pick. Even McSplooge says (and I quote) "this is a good pick." OK then. He's big (though skinny) and mobile and offensive and defensive. He was a Memorial Cup All-Star. Sounds good, if we didn't already have 600 defensemen on the depth chart in front of him. Though admittedly in 2 or 3 years we may need some defensive depth. What do I know about hockey, I just post tits around here.

In other news, fuck Brian Bark and the Bs and the PHucktards.

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moeman here, Day 2 update;

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It's an old-fashioned Sexy Friday Draft Day (well, Round 1 anyway) Morning Skate Markov-mania megapost

True Blood hottie vampires in honour of the True Blood Season 4 premiere this Sunday. Wrap around curl and I are back this summer over at True Blood...or Hockey? so check it out (if you care)

Bullet points for what you missed while dreaming of George Clooney's now-ex in a bikini...

• VODKOV!! For realz this time! 3 years at $5.75 per, or $17.25 total, or $8.625 per knee. The annual salary is what he was already making, exactly. That seems reasonable we guess. Sorry you don't get a post of your own Andrei, but there's a lot of tits shit to cover this morning. Here's your sexy legs so you fit in;
• Say hello to the new PHucktards, same as the old PHucktards, except with more Russian goalies;
• The full Habs' schedule is out. Opening and closing with the Laffs again. Oh joy; 
• Decent explanation from Hickey about the synergy of the Team 990 radio deal;
• Claude Noel (who?) is the Winnipeg ____s' new head coach;
• We guess we should say something about the NHL awards from the other night. Um, congrats Pleky for finishing 13th in the Selke voting! Or how about "Suck it, Sedin losers"?
• The first round of the draft is tonight in beautiful Minneapolis-St. Paul. Habs pick 17th. Here's McSPlooge telling you who will pick who;
• Here's some new(-ish) Kate Upton lingerie pics.

Do you enjoy cleavage? We bet you do! Then you'll enjoy this behind the scenes vid of the Katy Perry Rolling Stone cover story photo shoot. Happy Sexy Friday everyone.

2011/10/09 ~ Mark your CHalendars, Habs vs. Winnipeguesswho

No sugar that night Manitoba.
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Drink up Habs fans! ~ Vodkov, 2 years, $11.5M (...) (or not)

Habs i/o.

RDS.

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HF29 here. I have replaced the picture of the nice ass with these less nice words. Want to make it clear THERE IS NO DEAL. I was fooled by my own blog last night (in my defense I was drunk). On CJAD this morning they said they spoke to Vodkov's agent Don Meeghan and it's all bullshit. Point is, don't believe what you read on Twitter or what Tony Marinaro says.

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Please accept my apologies for getting marinaro sauce all over the FHF blog. ~ moeman

J-E-T-S Jets! Or welcome the Winnipeg _______s + ...

Well it's officially official now. The NHL Board of Yahoos has just officially approved the sale of the Thrash to whoever True North Sports and Entertainment is. Mazel Tov to all the FHF readers in the Peg who we hope won't let the renewal of the bitter Jets-Habs rivalry of the 1980's spoil their enjoyment of this site. I'm sure the Habs are looking forward to a February road trip to Winnipeg.

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moeman here, adding to the Canadian team fun;

Guess who isn't loved? Yup, you guessed right. NTTIAWWT.

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Whilst here;