Friday, June 24, 2011

It's an old-fashioned Sexy Friday Draft Day (well, Round 1 anyway) Morning Skate Markov-mania megapost


True Blood hottie vampires in honour of the True Blood Season 4 premiere this Sunday. Wrap around curl and I are back this summer over at True Blood...or Hockey? so check it out (if you care)

Bullet points for what you missed while dreaming of George Clooney's now-ex in a bikini...
  • VODKOV!! For realz this time! 3 years at $5.75 per, or $17.25 total, or $8.625 per knee. The annual salary is what he was already making, exactly. That seems reasonable we guess. Sorry you don't get a post of your own Andrei, but there's a lot of tits shit to cover this morning. Here's your sexy legs so you fit in;
  • Say hello to the new PHucktards, same as the old PHucktards, except with more Russian goalies;
  • The full Habs' schedule is out. Opening and closing with the Laffs again. Oh joy; 
  • Decent explanation from Hickey about the synergy of the Team 990 radio deal;
  • Claude Noel (who?) is the Winnipeg ____s' new head coach;
  • We guess we should say something about the NHL awards from the other night. Um, congrats Pleky for finishing 13th in the Selke voting! Or how about "Suck it, Sedin losers"?
  • The first round of the draft is tonight in beautiful Minneapolis-St. Paul. Habs pick 17th. Here's McSPlooge telling you who will pick who;
  • Here's some new(-ish) Kate Upton lingerie pics.
Do you enjoy cleavage? We bet you do! Then you'll enjoy this behind the scenes vid of the Katy Perry Rolling Stone cover story photo shoot. Happy Sexy Friday everyone.

62 comments:

moeman said...

DIE broonz DIE!

Mr. natural said...

I know this site keeps harping on it but WTF is the league's obsession with the open/close against Laffs?

I guess PHuckPHace Buttman thinks that eventually it will be a game of significance where the winner makes the playoffs and the loser is shut out.

PHuck the cotU, TSN, CBC, league management and Die Broonz/PHucktards Die!

That is all.

soperman said...

I am sad. I always liked Voracek (former Halifax Moosehead). He practiced his english on me and my wife after he came back from the World Juniors during his first season here. He comes from Kladno, like Plekky. Nice kid and a hard worker but it is hard to pull for him when he is playing for the Phucktards. The BlueJackets, meh, but the Phucktards - I will have to burn my Voracek jersey in a pagan ceremony down at the cottage.

Sorry Jake....

Steve said...

Tru Blood, Tru Blood, Tru Blood is this a hockey blog or TV blog?

Ha Ha PHuctards, your leadership sucks, wont make the playoffs with your goalie he is on the bottle and over the hill, what you pay for him anyway?

Fuck Mcsplooge, the guy is good enough for the Canadians, WTF.
We are going to pick the best 5'9" 160 lb two way player available.

Moey said...

Eric. *drools*. I met George once, nice guy. Markov signed for three years. Habs are playing Ducks in Anaheim in November. Fuck.

Steve said...

@Moey, I used to look like the CH version of Eric, 5'9" 160 lbs.

the Maritimer said...

@mr. natural...+1.

@Steve, my guess is Timmins takes Rocco Grimaldi, 5-6, 160lbs.

@Soperman, I know how you feel if a team I despise gets their hands on Huberdeau. Looks like Florida, I guess I could live with that.

Steve said...

Jets, because if you are in Winnipeg the best thing you ever see is the jet waiting to take you away.

Mr. natural said...

Holy PHuck 4:00 PM and I'm hammered (as is drunk, not small "d" over the hill non-clutch D).

Gotta sober up going to a high end BYOB Italian resto just opened in my area, weird to not think about making sure I have a table with the best view to the TV.

Yeah that's right the Mr. n wine cellar construction project is now complete and has a 250 bottle base that we will break into tonight, 1998 and 200 Amarones, then back home for a scotch and cigar finale!

PHuck the NHL!

Drink up Shriners!

moeman said...

"200 Amarones"

Wow. That is some old vino. Probably sour and stinky like tony marinaro.

teh BarhooCH said...

I think Winnipeg should keep their current name "Winnipeg NHL Franchise" wtf does it matter anymore?
Hands up those who think Markov will play over 60 games this season. Bruins suck! that is all.

teh BarhooCH said...

For that matter, I think the Habs should change their name to "Montreal NHL FranCHise"

HabsFan29 said...

@teh BarhooCH -

*slowly raises right hand*
*has left hand with crossed fingers behind his back*

love the drunken version of your handle btw

OK DRAFT!!! LET'S DO THIS THING!!!!!

/ crickets

Number31 said...

Ah yes, McGuire would pick Saad. Just what we need. Another inconsistent forward.

Whippineg Jets!

Number31 said...

Commissioner hides behind people the crowd doesn't want to boo. What a jerk.

Steve said...

That picture of Eric is stirring me NTTIAWRT

Steve said...

Its only because I imagine him breaking the Petzel or Pronger. I know what team I am on, and all that stuff on Facebook, just ......
Okay I am John Baird and I like to ....

Number31 said...

Pierre is frothing!

Steve said...

we pick tyler biggs because well is that not a great name.

the Maritimer said...

Wow, will Sean Couturier fall to #17? Let us pray.

Number31 said...

I hope they don't pick Tyler Biggs...

the Maritimer said...

FUCK!!!!!

Fucking Filthy Phlyers!!!!

Fuck you Homer!!!!

Number31 said...

I blame Maritimer for this. Fucking Flyers.

the Maritimer said...

Thanks 31. I need another drink.

The Habs are gonna get shit at 17.

Stoneface Gauthier figures they don't need any help. Like fuck they don't.

the Maritimer said...

Great job Blowhard Burke keeping the phucking Booins competitive for the next decade. Between Burke and Campbell, Boston might have a dynasty.

I'll have to keep Florida in my back pocket if Huberdeau makes them this fall.

the Maritimer said...

Rocco Grimaldi...wait for it.

Or the next Mr. Hockey. They are right in Minnesota after all.

Whatever became of David Fisher anyway?

Steve said...

How long does it take to make a pick, I changed my oil twice to SF waiting fuck,

Number31 said...

We! Want! Jurco!

the Maritimer said...

@31,YES!!!!

Or Zack Phillips or Nathan Beaulieu. They have to take somebody from the Q right?

Steve said...

the oilers have more talent than victoria's secrect and they get another top pick, fuck why did we not lose for years oh yeah we did and we got GOMEZ

Steve said...

MIKA ZIBANEJAD

the Maritimer said...

FUCK YAAHHHHH!!!!!

Number31 said...

Would have liked a forward but I'm OK with this guy. He killed the Juniors a few times this year from what I remember.

Stay classy, Minny.

Steve said...

@Maritimer what a lobster got your penis or share

ti-cul said...

yo yo yo maritimer, fuckin'hey!!!& congrats. It's awesome go Nathan Beaulieu!!!

Steve said...

Mcsplooge had him at 12

the Maritimer said...

I've watched a lot of Sea Dogs games the last two years and this guy is good. Lots of offensive potential, good skater, good size. I'm happy with this pick.

C'mon Goat make a deal to get a 2nd rounder and get Jurco and keep Number31 happy.

Steve said...

well I guess I am happy, with Tinordi an PFK and now we need a name for this guy, and TFS, scoring goals on CH will be like getting bail money out of Barbara Amiel

Steve said...

@Maritimer, well you are in the know to name Nathan. What about Swordfish?

Number31 said...

If I were Gauthier, I would try to trade one of the previously drafted D-men for a 2nd. Like Mathieu Carle.

the Maritimer said...

@Steve, how about Shark...or Bruin killer.

Number31 said...

Sucks for Setoguchi. Signs a 3 year deal yesterday, finds himself traded to Minnesota today.

the Maritimer said...

@Number31, how about Weber for a 2nd? Too much?

Steve said...

@Maritimer I like Shark

From the National Stupid about Broons pick

Now THAT, is a steal. The Bruins get a potential franchise defenceman at No. 9. And they have the Cup. And Tyler Seguin. And the Leafs still have Phil Kessel.

Number31 said...

So...Noeson on screen says "Comparable: Maxim Lapierre". Through their mouths "Comparable: Corey Perry". Wait, what?!

Steve said...

Burka traded up so he can get another fucking American, what is Harper really the GM of the Leafs?

Why dont they just change the name to the Americans and then we can play them with some reason.

Steve said...

Yep Laffs get Tyler Biggs, gave up two draft picks for one cement head, ha ha Burka

ti-cul said...

isn't tranta the only american city in Canada already?

Steve said...

@ti nope that would be hands down Calgary. The national stupid is doing a good job on this draft

I hope Tyler can learn how to take faceoffs! On a seriously hilarious note, TSN's comparable player for Biggs is Colby Armstrong, who I believe the Leafs already employ.

the Maritimer said...

Just wanted to point out, Nathan Beaulieu was an all-star defenceman at the Memorial Cup tournament and was invited to the WJC selection camp.

Jared Tinordi didn't have any of those credentials. Just sayin'.

I think the Habs caught a break and I retract my earlier comment that they would get shit at #17.

Number31 said...

Cement head is right. He actually likes the Leafs.

Steve said...

Ottawa just moved up bet they have eyes on Jurco, what a dick Burka is, could have had a good Jurco

the Maritimer said...

@Steve, Losertown is slowly being Americanized by Burka. More pugnacity acquired with Tyler Biggs. What a fucking joke that organization is.

Calgary is an American city? Must be all the oil they have out there. The Yanks love that stuff and will go to great lengths to get it. Like invading countries...

Steve said...

There is another Lego in the draft Nick Jensen, after we gave up on Belurus I thought we got all the Danes, lets hope so. Lego's and Swiss Miss forever

Mr. natural said...

Holy PHuck just came back from resto, and drunker than earlier,....I've missed a TON!

@MOEMAN, CORRECTION: A year 2000 Amarone.

Going to the boob tube, later girls.

Number31 said...

TSN loves inflating those young egos eh?

Steve said...

Maybe we got a good one in the Shark, like the Maritimer says he has got a fine resume

the Maritimer said...

C'mon Goat get on the phone and get one of these last picks and get Tomas Jurco. This kid has great hands. He's also over 6 feet tall. Don't let Burka hog all the limelight.

the Maritimer said...

Tampa is next. They owe the Habs.
Do it Goat!!!

Number31 said...

Ginger Campbell going to Florida to burn terribly in the sun.

the Maritimer said...

Well, that's it for round 1. I was hoping to see 4 Sea Dogs go in the first round, but 3 with a 3rd overall is pretty good.

I would really like to see Gauthier swing a deal and get a high second rounder to nab Tomas Jurco. This guy is a pure goal scorer and as we all know the Habs could use some offense, even if it's a couple years down the road.

Benny Pouliot would be worth a 2nd rounder wouldn't he?

Oh, and while you're at it Pierre, I hear Florida is taking on bad contracts.

Night all.

Number31 said...

Disappointed. Pierre McGuire didn't explode nearly as much as I thought he would. Gord Miller was caught off guard more than once, though!