Wednesday, June 27, 2007

First shift for HF10

So the problem becomes how do I make my (to quote HF29) "long awaited" world premiere? What in blazes do I talk about? Where do I fit in? I probably won't be as prolific as HF29, or as analytical and coherent as Panger76, nor will I spend as much time on my birthday with strippers as HF33. I'll probably be the one who writes most when he's angry, as if someone just showed me footage of Stan Jonathan pummeling Butch Bouchard or the Jets taking Shane Doan at number 7 with the Habs sitting at number 8, trying to talk themselves into Terry fucking Ryan.

That used to be every draft weekend, when Serge would invariably pick the biggest, slowest, stone-handedest draft eligible Seattle Thunderbird (Only Turner gets a pass, if for no other reason than the wallpapering he delivered to Jagr in the Habs-Pens series in 2001) or when Reggie would snap up the slow, smallish kid who went through French immersion and averaged a point a game in the WHL. (Matt Higgins, I'm looking in your direction ... good God man, Arron Asham scored 45 goals in the WHL one year. WTF were you doing out there, playing with a ringette stick?).

This year? I didn't even flinch when Espo slid by because I toe the FourHabsFans company line: Trust in Bob. It's like the analogy a college coach used to describe Notre Dame's hiring of Charlie Weis to replace Tyrone Willingham: Bob and Timmins replacing Reggie was like replacing mall cops with Navy Seals. If they get this offseason thing right by brainwashing Brian Rafalski into leaving Jersey, convincing Tampa that David Aebischer is their answer in goal for the low low price of Brad Richards, and Jurassic Park-cloning themselves a few of the numbers hanging from the rafters, I might need to listen Bob Cole, Harry Neale and Don Cherry fellate the Leafs all the way into 10th in the East just to get annoyed at something.

That being said, the new kid from Cretin-Derham better be more Chris Chelios than Brad Brown. All the best, Ryan McDonagh. We'll be watching ... and writing.

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