Tuesday, February 09, 2010

The Morning Skate for Tuesday, February 9th

Bullet points for what you missed while dreaming of a topless Anna Torv...
  • Nothing. You missed nothing yesterday. Very quiet day around here;
  • OK ok, so the GM stepped down and Pierre Gauthier takes over. The best part of the press conference yesterday was Pierre saying he was already negotiating with Pleks and lying that he's not trading any goalie any time soon;
  • Here's a little tidbit from Renaud Lavoie - Bob tried to get Kovalchuk to make one last big splash, but the Thrash wouldn't let Bob talk to Kovy's agent, so Bob wouldn't go forward;
  • Meanwhile the league rolls on. There were games last night - Jiggy finally loses, Brodeur can't help the Habs as he gives up a two-goal lead and loses to the Flyers, and Saku had 1G 1A in a win over the Kings.
A reminder that yours truly will be on CBC Daybreak around 7:15 this morning to talk about the quiet day yesterday and try not to swear. There's a "listen live" link on the right side of that page, in case you're awake early or in Korea.

Media whoring update - the CBC, TV this time, will be at my place after practice, filming me for a piece that should air tonight. More details as they develop.

Media whoring update 2 - The CBC reporter (Kristin Falcao) and her cameraman just left. I'll be on in the 6-630 half hour on CBC Montreal tonight. I'll try and figure out a way to get a copy and post it here too.

53 comments:

boob gainey said...

After a night of reflection ... we're fucked.

Since Gillett basically moved away from the team a year ago Boivin has been getting involved in the hockey decisions. I suspect that is in part why Gainey quit.

Gainey didn't care too much what the media thought about who should be in the team. He had lifted the cup as captain, so he could probably withstand a little criticism.

These guys can't. When the media/fan cabal try to run a player out of town, or when they demand a French Canadian centre, or draft pick, these guys will cave much faster.

You need to be very strong to be GM in this town.

orangeman said...

Hey, I'm in Korea! It's like the internet is talking just to me!

Orangeman said...

D'oh! Just caught the last 2 minutes. We had a mild earthquake here tonight and my sister skyped me to make sure it wasn't of Haitian proportions. I'm sure you were brilliant, 29.

GoldenGirl11 said...

Set the alarm for CBC. Listened to Clifford the Big Red Dog for 10 minutes until I realized I was tuned to CBC tv and you were not T-Bone the bull dog. Nicely done, 29.

moeman said...

29 has a nice radio voice. Bien fait mon ami.

The traffic guy sounds like a whiny little punk.

moeman said...

Also.

Number31 said...

STILL UPSET :(

Number31 said...

@boob - I was hoping Boivin would "step down". I think the wrong man has left the team........

L Dude said...

@31: I was hoping Gainey was replacing Boivin. Honestly though, I don't really know the role of the president of a hockey club.

Bob says maybe he'll learn to play the piano. Can you say new organist for the Bell Centre - hey? Hey??

L Dude said...

I'm picturing Bob belting out "In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida" (sp?) on the Bell Centre organ, just like the organist from The Simpsons.

And I like it.

bea.habs.fan said...

chose to go to the gym to work out the stress this is giving me.
wished I had stayed in bed to listen to 29.

I'm thinking of resiliating my RDS feed. but I figure the minute I do that, they'll go on a winning streak. I'm torn.

funny how losing a player or a coach did not bother me as much as losing Bob. I'll miss his inpertubleness

Ryan said...

Is there any chance of getting Kovalchuk this off-season? I highly doubt the Devils can fit him under the cap....so can we swoop in??

Boob Gauthier said...

Jiggy was a bit of a sieve last night and the Leafs lost a game despite outshooting the Sharks.

GoldenGirl11 said...

How many Boobs are here now? I'm so confused.

Boob Gauthier said...

Two. The normal amount.

Habsfan10 said...

@ Golden Girl:

Too many Boobs, not enough Tits, I think.

GoldenGirl11 said...

@boob2
now that's funny. Reminds me of when I first got married. I asked the lady in the kosher meat department how many chicken breasts were in each package. She looked at me like a complete idiot and said "how many do YOU have?".

dwgs said...

I thought the traffic guy was a gal.
Monique Lacombe, no? And yes, she sure is whiny.

Boob Gauthier said...

In fairness, have you driven in Montreal traffic lately?

dwgs said...

Actually, her traffic reporting is good and she does interesting investigative stuff on traffic issues, it's when they ask her opinion about anything else that I turn off my radio.
Oh and just so I don't get my ass banned...The Bruins suck donkey dicks!!

dwgs said...

MAB gone for 6-8 weeks with a bum knee.

Boob Gauthier said...

Red Fisher's column subtitle in the Gazoo today: "Somehere Carbo is smiling".

Maybe not. Maybe he's not a passive aggressive jerk.

L Dude said...

Love the awesome work you've done with the new header. Up all night working on that one I see :)

PG, don't make me hate you. I COULDN'T hate Bob, but I CAN hate you.
Do something for this team that gives me a man-crush unseen since the days of McSplooge/Phaneuf or McSplooge/Komisuckass or McSplooge/any other young nubile stud of a hockey player.

MAKE ME LOVE YOU DAMNIT!

soperman said...

How do you guys know what I was dreaming about?

Robbie said...

Due to a fact that language always seems to be an issue I have decided to offer an interpretation of certain things said during yesterdays press conference.

BOB:Je quitte l'équipe que j'aime, que je donne à celui en qui j'ai le plus confiance.
TRANSLATION: I'm so fucking fed up with all the second guessing, arm chair coaching, General Manager wanna Be's. I'm leaving in charge the guy the least competent to do the job (and the only one stupid enough to take it). Simply because i much prefer watching you eat one of your own from time to time. Oh and also Rejean Tremblay and that fucktard Betrand suck monkey nuts.

BOB:Durant les fete J'ai parler avec Pierre Boivin.
TRANSLATION: After 26 eggnog's I called up the President (what the fuck does he do anyways?) and told him that if he wants to be the king Kahuna. Its all yours BABY! You marketing fucktard!

BOB:Entre partir un peu plus tôt ou rester un peu plus longtemps, je préfère plus tôt que plus tard.
TRANSLATION: The last three years has felt like my fucking head was in a vice and was going to explode. I decided not to give all you media talking head, know everything, hockey fucks the pleasure of seeing it explode.

BOB: J'ai fait de mon mieux, je passe le flambeau.
TRANSLATION: I kept order in this fucked up town for way to long and got shit on by everyone except the funeral guys. I'm getting out of Dodge before the whole town goes to hell. (which by the way should be around March 1st).

BOB: I Might take up the Piano
TRANSLATION: Your all fucked

Stay tuned for translations of Pierre (the invisible man) Boivin and Pierre (i have done just about everything in the NHL and not been good at) Gauthier.

GoldenGirl11 said...

@LD
You just said it all. Could never hate Bob but George Hamilton is already on my nerves and he hasn't even done anything yet.

bea.habs.fan said...

@LD after you're comment, i checked the header - horrified and now even more freaked out. is this what is awaiting us?

can't wait to see 29 on TV. how much make-up will he have to wear?

Anonymous said...

GAH!

Just noticed the new header. Scary.

Boob Gauthier said...

The new header makes me sad.

moeman said...

Two boobs are better than none.

Anonymous said...

can we have as a tribute to "In Bob We Trust" the old header placed in the glossary for posterity ?

bea.habs.fan said...

@ Anon
I second that idea.

I almost decked one of my colleagues who said that it was about time!!!!
but then he is much younger (and obviously quite ignorant)

WV you can accuse me of agismsf but the Me generation cannot appreciate Bob

Robbie said...

Pierre Boivin in TRANSLATION

BOIVIN:On y a pensé, mais pas longtemps. La liste de gens qui peuvent être DG dans la LNH n'est pas longue. Il y a peu de gens dans le monde qui peuvent le faire. La plupart sont sous contrat. Quand on regarde les critères pour réussir dans ce marché, ce sont l'expérience, le bilinguisme et les bons résultats.
TRANSLATION: I was dreaming no one, but no one wants this fucking job. I woke up believing i was in Ottawa. I thought about it but not very long ( i have the attention span of the whale)I came to the conclusion very quickly that Gauthier and everyone else once associated with the Senators failed there (count chocula ''Martin''. ''Trevor I'm not from Timmins my name is Timmins''. ''Perry i used to be an accountant Pearns'' and ''Pierre can i fuck up your save percentage Groulx''). Hell why not reunite them all in Montreal. When you consider the criteria for being succesful in the NHL, Gauthier certainly does NOT fit any of the profiles but fuck it he speaks French, has Zero personality, so he can deal with you media fucktards. Now i can go back to trying to meet Clay Aiken through the Gillette Entertainment Group.

BOIVIN:Since no one really even knew i existed before this press conference i have nothing else of value to add.
TRANSLATION: None needed!

See Pierre Gauthier in translation next.

L Dude said...

You guys have clearly outclassed the header as it existed in its previous form. I think it's time for Youppi and Peter the Goat to be axed from this site.

You are deserving of much more class. Perhaps the 4 jerseys your handles represent strung together or a represtentation of their banners like they hang from the Bell Centre. Or gorgeous women wearing nothing but the jerseys. Something classy along those lines.

Boob Gauthier said...

Surely the amount of French a GM or coach needs to communicate with the media is small enough that any suitably motivated candidate could learn it in a weekend.

You only need about a dozen or so clichés, of the "puck moving defenceman" kind. No more than 200 words.

Habsfan10 said...

I like the new header. Makes it look like Youppi! is controlling Gauthier like a puppet. Somebody check Geoff Molson's closet for a Youppi! costume.

kevincrumbs said...

Not to move us away from the depressing hockey talk but why the fuck to kids these day (especially a woman) have idiotic names like Brooklyn? Brooklyn Decker? Sounds like some weird sex act that will get you arrested.

kevincrumbs said...

Also, Chicken out until March. FUUUUUCCCCCCKKKKKK!

HabsFan29 said...

Hey kids! Ive got the CBC in my house RIGHT NOW. They are filming me writing this comment! How meta!

HabsFan29 said...

ps the reporter is really cute. damn her she mentioned her husband.

the cameraman wants me to keep typing, so now im just typing bullshit. im worried my hair doesnt look good. what do you guys think?

Anonymous said...

HF29 - will there be a way for us yanks to see you appearance on CBC ?

Anonymous said...

*your

Boob Gauthier said...

They always mention their husbands. It's like the neutral zone trap.

Robbie said...

Pierre Gauthier in translation.

GAUTHIER:Travailler dans la LNH est un honneur, travailler comme directeur général est un honneur, travailler pour le Canadien est le plus grand honneur », a commenté Gauthier.
TRANSLATION: I've pretty much failed every other job i've had so fuck why not this one too.

GAUTHIER:La position de gardien est une de nos grandes forces. Nous avons deux gardiens qui nous donnent une chance de gagner tous les soirs. C'est une force qu'on aimerait conserver d'ici la fin de la saison. Nous croyons que nous pouvons aller de l'avant avec ces deux jeunes. On ne peut jamais dire jamais, mais c'est une position forte où nous aimerions rester forts.
TRANSLATION: Later this week ''Pierre can i fuck up your save percentage Groulx'' and i are going to play rock, paper, scissors to see who we trade. If the media and the fans hate the trade i'll claim Groulx cheated.Now thats being a GM in the NHL.

GAUTHIER: Nous voulons garder Tomas à Montréal. Le processus évolue
TRANSLATION: I have no idea what fucking language that guy speaks so i have no idea if we can get a deal done or not.

GAUTHIER: I have no personality and even less of a success record.
TRANSLATION: Were fucked!

@ 29 You look sexy you sexy bastard!

RiRi said...

Why are we collecting the Sens` sloppy seconds? Who`s next?

MAB out - Doesn`t Youppi! have a boulet de canon?

Also, WTF is with all these injuries?

Is Big Tits still alive? It seems like he fell off the face of the earth. Did we leave him in Florida?

It`s like the sucky-ness just keeps multiplying.

L Dude said...

@29: IT'S A TEST MAN! She's not REALLY married, she just wants to see if you have the balls to just 'take her'. That's what women want, right? Ignore the 6'4", 230 lb. cameraman and go for it!

L Dude said...

...because THAT will make for some good TV.

kevincrumbs said...

How do they even talk about FHF on TV without generating a large number of complaints of indecency?

gillis said...

say gillis says hi

Le Douze said...

i guess they are going to have to blur the screen, so they don't have the thought police coming down on them.

@Robbie: +3, your translations are much better than Babelfish's.

@LD - yes, I agree, go for it, 29. They have wifi in the slammer, don't they?

moeman said...

They say the camera puts on 10 lbs.

gillis said...

Theres your 5 seconds of fame 29!

PS. you didn't say "gillis says hi"

Anonymous said...

Boo-yah:
http://www.cbc.ca/video/#/News/Canada/Montreal/ID=1409353430