Sunday, May 11, 2008

Fuck You, You Fucking Little Cheap Shot Fuckity-Fuck

Hahahahaha. Mickey Ribs, you're a dick. The Ribs Haters around here* have been waiting for him to do something stupid for a while now. I personally felt it would be a diving penalty at a key point in the game. What happened was even better, because it should get him a suspension. We have a tag around here that reads "there's no English word for schadenfreude except 'Leafs'", but fuck, "Mike Ribeiro suspension" is pretty schadenfreude-riffic too.

So with time running out in the Wings-Stars game last night, Fuckey Ribs slashed Chris Osgood across the chest. Nice two-hander! You can see the video here. The fun starts around the 1:30 mark. Sure, the slash may have been retaliation for an Osgood butt end love tap, but that's no excuse. I love the way Ribfuck does it from behind the net. Like he can't even give a two-handed slash like a man, he has to hide behind the net to do it. Nice move, pussy-boy. Enjoy the press box.

My Sunday just got that much better.

*all of us.

9 comments:

YOUR RESIDENT BLOGGER: said...

To be fair, a two-hander from Ribs ain't gonna hurt ANYBODY, nevermind the only player on the ice that's armoured to withstand 100 mph galvanized rubber disks hurtling at them... and Osgood went down like he had been shot, only to miraculously recover moments later. Sounds familiar, doesn't it?

Still, an incredibly stupid move by Mickey, and I hope that he ends up sitting a game for it. Probably won't happen, though.

Jaybird said...

The best part for me was Osgood rolling around also. Instead of one guy looking like a douchebag we got two. Double bonus.

offspace said...

justice in the end hopefully for the little prick. take a seat ribs, drinks on me.

lawyergirl77 said...

offspace - can you mix something into those drinks? Nothing deadly, just something that gives him wicked bad gastro for a few weeks...

See, for me this is the best poetic justice EVER! Not only does he get smacked for a ridiculous retaliatory cheap shot (executed in typically pussy-like fashion) BUT the person on the receiving end of the shot pulled a somewhat less offensive Mickey Ribs right back.

AS for his "I was provoked by the butt end of his stick" - suck it up, asshole. It's the playoffs. If you can't take something like the butt end of a stick as you GO SKATING BY THE GOALIE'S CREASE, you shouldn't be playing this game.

*sigh* This just made my day...

baroque said...

Actually, a lot of Wings fans are hoping he doesn't get suspended.

Dallas said after the first game they needed to be better on faceoffs (they were even WORSE - Detroit won 71%!) and get more shots on net (they had a whopping 18, so maybe Osgood was just shocked because he had forgotten what it was like to get hit in the chest). Don't give them any excuses and see how they adjust at home when they haven't figured it out yet.

It will also give Kronwall a chance to line up a hit on Ribs in the neutral zone.

(And Osgood said after the game that the stick caught him more on the side and the upper arm than squarely on the chest, as he was turning away and not expecting anything since the game was over.)

Although considering how much Dallas missed the net, maybe Ribs was aiming for his groin and just shot high. I've never seen a team botch a 4-on-1 that badly. :)

baroque said...

Also:
Osgood said after the game that he wasn't trying to hit him with the butt-end (and if it was on purpose, give him bonus points for subtlety!), but was watching him and the other Dallas skater closely because he wanted to see if they were planning on running Nick Lidstrom behind the net as he went to pick up the puck.

In game instead of afterwards it would probably be interference on Osgood's part, and it would be a deserved penalty.

Baroque said...

No suspension, just fines for him and Osgood.

Did he ever do anything like this with Montreal?

From George Malik:

There were two very strange instances leading up to what one might deem an "incident" between Mike Ribeiro and Chris Osgood.

First and foremost, when the second period started, Ribeiro did not skate into his own end to warm up. He insisted upon taking three long, looping spins into the Wings' end of the ice, starting from the Stars' bench door. He quite literally got in Kirk Maltby's way as he skated about thirty feet laterally, going deeper and deeper into the Wings' zone with each turn, until he skated all the way to the half boards and nearly touched the faceoff dot on his third spin. That seemed very out-of-place.

Second, before the last faceoff, Ribeiro and a teammate who I cannot name spent an unusually long period of time talking to one another and to Dave Tippett, to the point that I was all but certain that the Stars were going to be called for delay of game, or that the refs would just drop the puck without them.

I have no idea whether these incidents were related to what Ribeiro and Osgood proceeded to do to one another, but they certainly foreshadowed the last-second melee in a bizarre fashion.

Bryan said...

by no means am i a ribeiro fan, but osgood had it coming.

go pens go

sofia said...

whatever. ribeiro is hotter than the lowlives running this blog