Wednesday, November 26, 2008

And now for something really completely different - Wings Game Preview and Open Thread

Well, when we tried something completely different on Monday it worked... for 55 minutes. So what if The Burner passed the puck to the ghost of Bill Durnan? Who wasn't in his net because he was pissed that his number hasn't been retired by the Habs? So what if he was a six-time Vézina winner and six-time first team All-Star? Oooh, rambling tangents - that's really completely different. Or not.

ANYWAY, the lovely lady above is Emma Andersson, hot Swedish something and fiancée of Wings forward Henrik Zetterberg. Here's video of her frolicking in lingerie with Victoria Secret models. I think. It's all in Swedish. Go Wings! Go Henrik! Go Emma! Go (my) pants!

To be really completely different, I will now attempt to write this preview in freeform verse.

Oh the night of Wednesday at seven and a half hours
The Habs and Wings shall play in the heart of Michigan
While TSN forces MAGUIRE upon the masses again
Our gallant warriors are 1-1-2 in their last four; while
Our gallant foes ride a 7-0-2 streak
Oh how we weep
We mourn the loss of HockeyTownTodd
as we direct you to Red Wings Corner
Our heroes lately are the odd names of Kosto and Gorges;
with some Lang thrown in
While Pleks, Kovy, Tangy and Higgy burn in the icy pits of hell
Oh how we weep
Datsyuk Zetterberg and Conklin we envy your heat
though Hossa and Draper struggle as modern man does every day
The Wings are 33% on the PP
Oh how we weep
Price will be on guard facing Lord Conklin
BGL, DOOM and Gui! lick their wounds
the female form is praised at Bouzouki
We weep not

I'm sure you can do better in the comments. Limerick Dude, away!


Habsfan10 said...

It's like the FHF version of Beowulf (except less monster-killing). Genius!

Limerick Dude said...

From one Master poet to another - that was beautiful. It brought a tear to my eye, or that could be the fried onions on my sub - I can't tell, or the friction burn.

@10: Does playing tug of war with the Cyclops count as monster killing?

moeman said...

(English-only Guitar Solo Intro by Saku Simmons)

I feel uptight on this Wednesday night
Seven o' clock, the MacBook's the only light
I hear RDS' song and it pulls me through
Comes on lg77, tell me what to do
She tells me

Go Habs
Higgins is gonna move his skates
Go Habs
HockeyTown is gonna leave their seats
You can't lose this game in Detroit Hock City

Go Habs
Kovy's gonna make some moves
Go Habs
McCarty's already left his seat

Getting late
I just can't wait
Ten o'clock and I gotta hit 110%
First I drink, then I do some meth
Start up the remote, and switch to anti-CHambre

Go Habs
Everybody praise TFS™
Go Habs
Carbo's (ahem) system isn't such a mess

(Guitar Solo by Al PoonTang)

Movin' fast, doin' 93
We hit top speed, now movin' too slow
We felt so good, felt so alive
Our song playin' Go Habs Go
It goes

Go Habs
Everybody loves our Tits
Go Habs
Why does our PP play like shit?

(Drum Solo Josh Criss he's Gorgeous)

(Guitar Solo by Ace FrehLang)

Twelve o'clock, I gotta rock
There's The Daily Show, and then some Colbert
Oh my God, no time to sleep
RDS's Habs Express is on again

Go Pants
Everybody's gotta shake this blog
Go Habs!

(Guitar Solo by Bia and Branca)

HabsFan29 said...

@moeman - my God that was classic. Classic Rock. And HF10 and I are HUGE KISS fans - we rocked out the Bell Centre together in 2001 when Paul flew over the audience and landed right near us on the floor. good times

Anonymous said...

I can't wait. I am going to the game tonight, going all decked out in my habs jersey, habs jacket and habs touque. I hate the wings.

Lets go Habs!

Habsfan10 said...

First an epic poem, now KISS remakes? Man, I love this blog.

KISS in 2001 was the greatest not-really-a-farewell-tour-at-all tour ever.

HabsFan4 said...

Dear Lord do I ever adore this blog.

If this blog woke me up at night crying, I would gently rock it back to sleep.

If I could I would breast feed this blog.

Van Hab said...

@ moeman:
Amazing. I think you're comissioned for more in the future. May I suggest (Keeping with the Kiss theme)

Score Own-Goals all night
Tits were made for deking you
Dreamin' (of a regulation win)
Calling Dr. Lang

Limerick Dude said...

I too endorse KISS as the official song-parody band of FHF.

I'm personally hoping for a sweet version of Kovy's on Fire.

Limerick Dude said...

oh, and as Van Hab stated - obviously:

Meth, I hear you calling...

moeman said...

@LDude - 'Meth, I hear you calling...' now thats funny.

Working on a riff of 'Lick it up'

WTF rhymes with ooh yeah?

cottoneye said...

@ Moeman: Brunet?

J.T. said...

Oh, how we weep!

moeman said...

Laps makes it 1-0.

Is everyone backstage?

Panic Mode said...

The parade is back on.

moeman said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
moeman said...

Just testing the trashcan icon.


I was made for loving Habs baby!

fezworth said...

Wow. This makes me happy, although's Live Gamecentre is not.

Rag said...

The last time I was this happy, "I heart Huckabees" was considered a good movie!

cottoneye said...

I honestly cannot remember the last time we had a 3 goal lead!Weeeee! Was it the Ottawa game we won 4-0?

lostinleafland said...

Higgins is alive and breathing,,who knew? Let's make sure Rhino is not on the ice during the last 5 mins.

Beta169 said...

I know Big George isn't in the line-up tonight, but come on, it's SO obvious...

Detroit Laraque City

God, I feel dirty.

Beta169 said...

Frazen just went all R.E.M. on Burner.

I could (turn you inside out)

lostinleafland said...

I told ya, get O'Byrne off the ice,,fuck.

Panic Mode said...

Uh-Oh Byrne strikes again.

lostinleafland said...

O'Burned again.
He's doing his best to make us stop worrying about Breezer.

Beta169 said...

How many defencemen can Panger fit in his trunk?

And just like that Pleks gets goal #2

Beta169 said...

Or not.

lostinleafland said...

good things happen with 60 mins of team work. great effort. nice win.

Panic Mode said...

It's back on baby.

Number31 said...

Habs make my shitty day all better!

O'Byrne's new nickname is "Benched for the 3rd Period Please".

HabsFan29 said...

I am not kidding people I am in New Jersey.

Plekanec? PP? Winning goal? WTF???

Nice to come to the USA and find this out. I may stay here now

Anonymous said...

The game was a lot of fun. I have a few complaints, all of which are not hockey related.

A 2 hour tunnel bus ride to get there, when it should only be a 10 minute ride.

The Joe Louis Staff was very rude. Even one of the staff members said "Oh those fucking canadians.!" Was not pleased. We had standing room tickets, and apparently with standing room you have to wear pink bracelets. We quickly ripped ours off. As soon as Laps scores, we start cheering and sure enough an unsher comes over wanting to see our bracelets. Apparently our tickets were not good enough, almost got kicked out.

I hate Detroit.

What was nice to see, was everytime a Lets Go Wings Chant started , a "Go Habs Go" chant would drown it out. The "Ole, Ole" after the game pissed a lot of Red Wings fans off.

It was fun. Red Wings fans are not real hockey fans, with about 7 minutes left (before Franzen scored) the building started to clear out. It could of been a game (if not for Pricey) but Red Wings Fans are not real fans.

I hate Detroit. That is all. Sorry for the rant.