Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Excuse Me? When? What? Hockey? What's Hockey?: Election Day Special Game Review: Habs 5 - Flyers 3

HF4: Mr. Dion, thank you so much for being here with us today.

SD: Thank you, HeychF4.

HF4: Mr. Dion, you said that the Canadiens had played a terrible first and second period last night in Philadelphia, and that the team had no rhythm, nor any tempo and could not find any breaches in the Flyers forecheck. You said they couldn’t muster any offense. Finally, you said Guy Carbonneau’s game plan was faulty and poorly adapted to the Flyers style of play.

SD: Yes, they were terrible. And for two periods coach Carbonneau had no vision for his team.

HF4: Mr. Dion, what would you have done differently in those first two periods, had you been the coach of the Montreal Canadiens?

SD: If I was the coach?

HF4: That’s right. If you were the coach of the Canadiens.

SD: When was I coach? Tonight? Now? If I’m the coach now, how can I change the first two periods? The game is over! Now I’m coach? What can I do?

HF4: No, if you were coach last night what would you have done differently?

SD: If I’m coach last night? Ben, when? At what time of the first period? Or when in the second period? Because if it's the second, then I can't change the first. It aready pass. So when?

HF4:No not during the game, before the game, what would you have done differently?

SD: Tree year ago, when the coach arrive? I would have changed many thing tree year ago. I would put Ribeiro in the first line. Maybe give Perezhogin more time on power play.

HF4: No, no. I want to know, what I’m asking is what would you have done differently last night?

SD: I don’t know what you mean! Last night, where at the hotel? Can we start over?

HF4: …. Sure, let’s start over.

HF4: Hello Mr. Dion, thank you so much for joining us on Four Habs Fans.

SD: On what?

HF4: Four Habs Fans, you know our blog, the blog on the Montreal Canadiens.

SD: I don’t understand your question.

HF4: I didn’t ask you a question, I was just thanking you for being here with us.

SD: Where?

HF4: Mr. Dion, you said the Canadiens played a bad first two periods last night.

SD: Oh they were terrible, I can’t believe they score in third, thanks god.

HF4: Mr. Dion what would you have done differently had you been the coach of the Canadiens last night?

SD: Why do you repeat the same question? I’m not deaf. I HEAR EVERY SINGLE SYLLABLE that comes out of your mouth perfectly!

HF4: Fine, then what would you do?

SD: I would put the plan quinquennal in place and would put more ketchup over there. Maybe touch up the paint. Eat those stamps. Build my team and implement these new borders.

HF4: Mr. Dion for two periods, the Canadiens couldn't find the net. Then in the third, they did. All I want to know is what you would have done differently, as coach of the Canadiens, to help the team find the net in those two periods.

SD: I personally believe that US Americans are unable to do so because some uh, people out there in our nation don't have maps, and I believe that our education, such as in Africa and the Iraq, everywhere like such as. And I believe that they should, our education such as over here in the US should help the US, or should help South Africa and should help Iraq and the Asian countries so we will help to build up our future, or.

HF4: Mr. Dion would you like some water? Somebody get him some water. Mr. Dion, did you watch the game last night?

SD: Canadien?

HF4: Yes.

SD: They play so bad for two periods, no?

HF4: Mr. Dion, what you would have changed in those first two periods if you were the coach last night.

SD: I can fly coach last night, maybe I would just change the movie. Maybe show Madame Congeniality Deux, or something good like that.

HF4: No. No sir, that’s not what I’m asking you.

SD: Then what are you asking?

Advisor to Stéphane Dion, Stéphane Richer: He’s asking you a very simple question. He wants to know what you would have done differently in the first two periods had you been coaching the Canadiens last night. The first two periods of the second period.

SD: Now that’s a question! Why didn’t you ask me like that? Can we start over?

HF4: …. Fine, let’s start it over. Thanks, Mr. Dion, thanks for being here.


HF4: Mr. Dion I want to begin by asking you a question.

SD: Can we start over?

Canada, at least she's not on the ballot:


Habsfan10 said...

Hey, at least her answer makes more sense than Dion's Carbon Tax.

Beta169 said...

Based on the politically slanted postings, I'm going to venture a guess that you're all torts trial lawyers. That's not a compliment.

panger76 said...

The opinions expressed or implied by individual members of FHF do not necessarily reflect the views of the rest of the group.

Vote Green!

Ian Vitro said...

I don't know if the Carbon Tax makes sense, but Harper's plan will increase emissions. More emissions = worse ice. Therefore Harper is bad for hockey.

I'm with Panger here... For better hockey, vote Green.

Number31 said...

Oh those snarky Liberals lost my vote when they DIDN'T select Dryden as leader...

HabsFan29 said...

hehehe. that's good political satire, 4. on a hockey blog!

Habsfan1993 said...

I'm a fan from south of the border, but that was still hilarious (even though I don't know who the hell Stephane Richer is, or whatever his name is.

And to the idiot above: everyone hates lawyers until they need one.

dylan said...

You're best posting to date..classic stuff.
When do you find the time to complete your real job?
"i can fly coach last night,maybe I would just change the movie"..priceless.