Wednesday, October 29, 2008

We agree, Calvin. Blech. Habs 3, WhalerCanes 2 (shootout of death)

Plan the parade - uh, we got two points? That's something. Kovy's goal is still giving me an erection. Ii's been more than four hours so I may need to seek medical assistance. Tangy is beginning to look like a hell of an acquisition. TFS played his usual stalwart game, and his calm demeanor in the face of shootouts is matched only by his bizarre love of country music. Maybe opponents are scared when they see Garth Brooks on his mask. Saks all of a sudden seems to be a shootout master. Breezer didn't play, that's always good. And the tribute to coaching legends Toe Blake, Dick Irvin and Scotty Bowman at the start of the game was perfect, like all Habs ceremonies.

The sky is falling - sit back, grab a delicious beverage, this may take a while. Gui! is really starting to suck the love juice out of the Guay Tender Saks line. Time to put Higgy there. If his ability to hit an open net is as good as his ability hit an open slutty babe, Gang Bang Lang is going to have his nickname revoked. The Hamr got injured, and we don't know the extent. That's bad, 'cause his D partner Rhino did not seem to improve after sitting out Saturday in the press box to think about life. Habs PP can move the puck like my dealer can move meth, but putting the puck either on net or actually in the net seems to elude them (0 for fucking 7). Pleks is starting to really worry us; maybe it's time to try Lang with Kovy. After dominating the shots Saturday night, we got badly outshot last night. Habs didn't show up until about 12 minutes had elapsed in the first period.

Wake the fuck up, Carbo - he had this to say about the game: "Except for the first 10 minutes of the first period, I thought it was a pretty even game. Look at how many empty nets we missed." That's it, accentuate the positives, like how many empty nets you missed. Time to start doing some fucking coaching there, Mr. Jack Adams nominee.

Wake the fuck up, RDS - I like Benoit Brunet; he is articulate and seems to know his hockey. But he is really becoming a fucking homer and it's pissing me off. When Staal was pummeled by DOOM in OT and then Staal got a retaliatory tripping penalty, BB immediatly reacted with "that was a clean hit and Staal was stupid for taking that penalty." Uh, no. DOOM clearly hit him from behind into the boards and basically tripped over a falling Staal getting out of there. Watch the fucking replay, dickhead, instead of jumping to your homer conclusions.

Chez Parée bound? Price, Tangy, Kovy and Saks. The rest need to do some soul-searching before they're getting any action.

Next evil-ish foe - Habs visit the land of 10,000 lakes and the league-leading Wild. Koivu vs Koivu! BGL vs. Boogaard (please please please)! Habs suckiness vs. my liver! Should be a hell of a matchup.


Limerick Dude said...

Unless Lang's inability to put a puck in the ocean REALLY pisses you off, I'm going to assume you're begging for a BGL vs. Boogie Man matchup.

Yep, that game sucked ass. Move on.

I really didn't think Pleks was going to continue to 'play like a little girl', like he did in the playoffs.

Since Gui! and GBL both can't seem to hit the yawning cages, perhaps if they're on the same line the whole 2 negatives make a positive will happen.

HabsFan29 said...

Thanks LD. Some day I will start proofreading. Fixed.

Habsfan10 said...

Wait, when was Koivu not a shootout master? All I seem to remember from shootouts last year was Price stopping a million and Koivu scoring with that one backhand deke move he has.

HabsFan29 said...

@10 - yeah, i meant over last year and this. before that he really wasnt very good, that i recall

Montréaliste1 said...

Before that, there wasn't any shootouts. hmmm. 29, meth is bad.

Limerick Dude said...

Yo mon, we are in year 4 of shootouts. meth is not bad.
Check out NHL Shootouts
Saku's little bro appears to be great at the shootout.
All those stats and not a lot of Habs really. The first I found (and found to be amusing) was Ryder. He's in the futility stats. 1/11 for his career. AND I remember his goal because he actually used his only talent - his wrist shot. The other 10 times he's tried to deke. Keep on deking...

HabsFan29 said...

LD meth is definitely bad, but thanks for the defense!

I love that shootouts site! never saw it before. holy fuck, i may be watchintg videos all afternoon now

copyranter said...

The Komisarek hit probably deserved a penalty, but Staal may have committed an itsy-bitsy slew footsie in there (I did watch the replay). Kovalev's bullet was artwork.

Limerick Dude said...

Yeah I just found that. I'm likely to be fired soon. Oh well.

From November 10, 2005:
Pens vs. Habs.
It's the game where it was Crosby's first game against the Habs. He did the little kick, then roofed it to win the game.

But the funny part of the video is Pierre 'yes i'm an obnoxious bald idiot' Maguire on Perezhogin:
"He's the happiest player in the NHL right now. He has a perpetual smile."

I guess now he's the happiest player not in the NHL.

Also, check out Saku on March 17, 2007 against the Leafs. Nice move. I remember it well.

moeman said...

Potential game day, erm, pics and 'Miss Montreal'.

HabsFan29 said...

@moeman - i think i love you

/ would "no homo" this comment, but it's redundant considering i love the site with tits

prairiegirlwarriorpoet said...

I'm going to the game tomorrow, it will be my first Habs game (never got to see them in Wpg). I sure hope it's a better show than last night.

Number31 said...

Is it just me or is almost every 2nd game League-wide going to a shootout? Just seems more common than last year...