Monday, February 09, 2009

Habs On The Road Again, looking for answers, man - Flames Preview and Open Thread

Whoa dude. So I hear the boys are going out West for 6 games. What's up with that 9 PM start man? That's like, 8 hours after 4:20, so I'm totally spaced by then and crashing. How am I supposed to stay awake? Twinkies I guess. Plus, 9 PM is the start time for my Simpsons reruns. Don't fuck up my schedule man.

Habs are totally fucking lame anyway. Losers of 7 grams out of their last 9? No way! And I heard the Flames are sucky too, losers of 4 straight. On the plus side, the Habs players look totally baked out there! Kovy's floating around in la-la land like he totally got into the chronic. And that Jesus kid is staring right through the puck as the puck goes right through him. I want some of that icky!

So me and Woody were hanging out on the bus. He tells me the Habs would totally improve their play with some hemp unis. And help save the environment! That's like, win-win! Unlike the IRS. That's totally lose-lose.

Say hi to FHF cats Panger and Bryan who will be chillin' at the Saddledome tonight. That building's shape is freaky. What's it shaped like anyway?

66 comments:

Sonia said...

If it's shaped like a saddle, can you still call it a dome?

Habs lose tonight. Between a punishing practice, long flight, jet lag, Jaro probably giving everyone the flu and their general suckitude, I'm not too hopeful.

rutbut said...

It's shaped like a stack of Pringles.

Anyone want to wager the team that returns to the Phone Booth on the 21st will look much different than the one that left Montreal yesterday?
On the bench? Behind the bench?

Habsfan10 said...

Matthew McConaughey approves this preview.

Anonymous said...

Mmmm, sticky icky icky. That reminds me of something I need to go do...

Van Hab said...

@ rutbut:
I was thinking the same thing. I've got tickets to sunday's game in Vancouver and I was wondering if a shakeup would occur between now and then. I think Bob will wait a couple more weeks though, at least till Tanguay is back.

Perplexed in Montreal said...

Should we trade many of the UFAs at the deadline (except Komi)?

A lot of teams might like a Tanguay or a Koivu for the playoffs.

Van Hab said...

I'd keep Tanguay for sure. I don't think he wants to play anywhere but Montreal and he was having a pretty good year before he went down. We'd probably get a very good return for Kovalev, who I'd be happy to see gone.

HFF33 aka Panger said...

Is it 4:20 yet??

HabsFan29 said...

it's 4:20 somewhere

Limerick Dude said...

heh heh. rutbut. Get your ID from the word vefification? Good Idea. I am now tuloose.

HABS ARE #1!!!!!!!!!


you know....at sucking.

So you Calgarys and Ottawas of the world get in line! We suck best!

tuloose out.

Limerick Dude said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Limerick Dude said...

I'm looking forward to the expansion of this website

Maybe we can help out with content.

verjack out.

lawyergirl77 said...

I heard a rumour that a good chunk of TFS' problems as of late stem from the fact that he partakes far too much of the herb... Apparently he started getting pretty chronic when he was injured, and now he's smoking way too much.

While I'm not one to throw stones, I've gotta say I'm pretty disappointed... Once in a while is fine, but when it starts to have a major impact on your play... eech...

hockeyzombie said...

@ lawyergirl

Where did you hear that rumour about Carey? I heard that he got played by some girl. Hmmm maybe her name was Mary Jane.

Limerick Dude said...

Just an FYI. For any of you who think losing Gui! for a month or more is significant, think again.
From TSN's Power Ranking page (where the Habs are now #16):

With seven losses in the last nine games, the Canadiens are reeling and it wouldn't hurt to have Carey Price steal a game or two to help right the ship. Price has allowed one or fewer goals just once in his last 16 starts.

Key Injuries: LW Alex Tanguay (shoulder), C Robert Lang (Achilles).
- note the lack of Gui-ness.

mmmmm, Guiness.

gillis said...

wow the habs suck.

As if I'd stay up to watch them at 9pm.

I probably will.

I'm depressed.

Sonia said...

@LG77 - This looks more like a regular cancer stick, not a doobie.

moeman said...

Mama don't let your babies grow up to be bloggers
Don't let 'em pick scores cuz they drive themselves nuts
Make 'em be doctors and lawyers and such

Mama don't let your babies grow up to be bloggers
They always stay home yet they're always alone
Even with the FHFers they love

Bloggers ain't easy to love and they're harder to hold
They'd rather give you a game preview then their meth or their gold
AK's AllStar belt buckle and an old faded Breezer each night begins a new day
And if you don't understand them and they don't get some meth
They'll probably just WordPress away

Mama don't let your babies grow up to be bloggers
Don't let 'em type TFS™ cuz it'll just drive them nuts
Make 'em be doctors and lawyers and such

Mama don't let your babies grow up to be bloggers
They'll never blame Carbo and its in Babs that they trust
Even if he ends up trading someone they love

Bloggers like smokey old strip clubs and $10 beers
Little warm Tits and hot girls at the game
And them that don't know them won't like them
And them that do sometimes won't know how to take them
They ain't wrong, they're just different
and their Habs pride won't let them say things to make Leaf fans laugh

Mama don't let your babies grow up to be bloggers
Don't start picking on Saku cuz it'll drive them just nuts
Make 'em be doctors and lawyers and such

Mama don't let your babies grow up to be bloggers
They always stay home yet they're always alone
Even with the FHFers they love

Mama don't let your babies grow up to be bloggers
Don't let 'em sing Olé! cuz it drives others just nuts
Make 'em be doctors and lawyers and such

The Gate To The Groin For Yannick Bertrand said...

The only good that can come out of tonight is a Jaro game review

gaticing out

Shutdown said...

@sonia- that was probably to sooth his nicotine craving until he can go get some more chewing tobacco.

rutbut said...

@Van Hab
I've got this feeling that Gainey will pull the trigger sooner than later. Anxious about who we'd have to give up to get what we need though.

@Limerick Dude
ID is a traditional name, been in my family for centuries. Welsh/Hungarian

@moeman
That's my entertainment for the month. Now the Habs can suck like Hoovers for the whole Western swing... I won't care. Makes me wish I studied law.

gillis said...

The habs have no chance of winning this game. Chris Lee is reffing, or at least attempting to ref.

I'm off to Jacques Cartiers bridge now. You may not hear from me for a while.

HabsFan29 said...

hey look i came in at the right time. Dagger!!!

@moeman - brilliant as always

Sonia said...

How about that crowd! Olé, olé indeed!

Rips it, scores! said...

Keep the puck on the ice, FFS!!!

Jesus H. Christ.

melly said...

This keeps up and it'll be time to dust off that oldie-but-goodie... 'Halak it. Halak it a lot.'

Rips it, scores! said...

So apparently the Flames are allowed to wrestle Habs players to the ice behind their goal without fear of a penalty?

Fair enough. The refs must be thinking of us fans and our sanity.

Rips it, scores! said...

Absolutely stonking PP guys. Top notch.

HabsFan29 said...

fuck. im trying to stay awake for this?

Rips it, scores! said...

As above.


Kill me.

perplexed in montreal said...

Play

perplexed in montreal said...

60

perplexed in montreal said...

fucking

perplexed in montreal said...

minutes

Rips it, scores! said...

The drive for 25 is alive!!!11

I've had an extremely bad time since Christmas and this shower of useless pricks aren't helping my mood in the slightest.

Rips it, scores! said...

SOG this period:

Calgary - 15
Montreal - 2

6 minutes left. Jesus, Mohammed, Budda, anyone, please end the suck.

kevincrumbs said...

These Flames announcers are absolutely brutal and I guess Rogers Sportsnet is absolutely brutal too. I've heard "Matt D'Agostino", "Mathieu D'Agostini" and seen "Maxime Lapierre". Not to mention that all of these mini ads are annoying the fuck out of me.

Why is it that we can't get the puck out of our zone and when we do, we have no concept of forechecking.

The only good thing that can come out of yet another loss is some fucking real changes coming and maybe Carbo getting canned.

Last but not least, Jaro has saved our asses tonight. This should be about 8-1 right now.

kevincrumbs said...

Oh yeah, we actually have two goals. Hm.

Rips it, scores! said...

Yay, a season saving PP!

YAY!!!!

Rips it, scores! said...

Fuckers.

kevincrumbs said...

Carbo. Out. Now.

FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK

Rips it, scores! said...

This is easily the worst I've seen the Habs play since those heady days of late 06-07. Remember those days, gang? Good times.


I'm not bitter. oh no.

rutbut said...

Fuck this motherfucking bullshit!

I'm done!

Where's my pipe?

matt - watching the collapse said...

Re-locate the team. Kansas City Canadiens...

kevincrumbs said...

These Flames assholes shouldn't feel so great about themselves. This is like beating a blind man in a video game.

melly said...

Hey, remember when the Habs were being touted as the Class of the East?

HAHAHaha... wait. It's too painful even to laugh.

Jaro's doing well but he's being hung out to dry.

Fuck this shit. My little co-ed beer league team can outplay the Habs right now. Fuck knows our D is better than theirs.

Rips it, scores! said...

This is how the Habs make me feel right now. Double facepalm.

Jonathan said...

I think if Calgary scores one more goal, I'm going to actually kill myself.

kevincrumbs said...

Even the fight sucked.

Rips it, scores! said...

Nice duck by Boullion though!

matt - this team sucks said...

This is turning out to be the worst season I have ever watched as a Habs fan..

Of course we have seen a lot of bad times recently, but this takes the cake...

melly said...

@matt: Seriously. Watching this team suck, when we all know they ARE BETTER THAN THIS SHIT, is way more frustrating than it ever was watching a sucky team suck.

kevincrumbs said...

Yay! Another Flames goal! Each additional goal against the Habs is one goal closer to Carbo walking the plank!

perplexed in montreal said...

Wow. This is horrendous.

Rips it, scores! said...

Kill me. PLEASE.


To hell with this, time to cheer for a Montreal team who has a chance of success this season. That's right:

LET'S GO EXPOS!

Everybody!

Rips it, scores! said...

Wow, the Expos sure so rock the Big Owe, eh?

kevincrumbs said...

Yes! YET another Flames goal! C'mon, I want the Flames to get into double digits. I want to wake up in the morning to read that Carbo's been canned.

fezworth said...

Just got downstairs. Was going to timeshift it, but then my buddy messages me the score. He really did me a favour on that one.

Fuck, this is ugly.

Rips it, scores! said...

Oh crap, a 5 on 3 for the Habs. That must be worth at least 3 short-handed goals to Calgary.

kevincrumbs said...

You know, it's really bad when I'm not even angry at this point. It's so bad that I think this is sort of funny in a twisted way. We're playing so poorly that I think I just saw Jonas Hoglund out there.

Rips it, scores! said...

@kevincrumbs: + 1

I'm experiencing a serious case of twisted amusement from this debacle at this point.

South Shore Habs Fan said...

I've an idea - how about each player takes a turn in nets during the next few games? Maybe then they'll realize that hey, maybe the goalie could use some fucking help.

That, and I think Price and Halak could probably forecheck better than these pansies.

orangeman said...

The Habocalypse is upon us.

Anonymous said...

What a sick fuckin' joke this team's become. Soon as Koivu come back, I think we should be more worried about our team being healthy instead.

This just in... Habs trade:

Andrei Markov, Robert Lang, Alex Kovalev, Andrei Kostitsyn, Saku Koivu, Tomas Plekanec, Sergei Kostitsyn, Roman Hamrlik, Maxim Lapierre, Guillaume Latendresse, Tom Kostopoulos, Matt D'Agostini, Josh Gorges, Patrice Brisebois, Christopher Higgins, Steve Bégin, Max Pacioretty, Francis Bouillon, Mike Komisarek, O'Byrne,Mathieu Dandenault, Georges Laraque, Carey Price, Jaroslav Halak

for

Drew Larman, Stefan Meyer, Michael Duco, Tanner Glass, Dan Collins, Andrew Sweetland, Karl Stewart, Shawn Matthias, Kenndal McArdle, Michal Repik, David Brine, Jacob Micflikier, Randall Gelech, Riley Emmerson, Michael Caruso, Jason Garrison, Rory Fitzpatrick, Keaton Ellerby, Peter Aston, Kyle Hagel, Luke Beaverson, Jordan Henry, Franklin MacDonald, Mike Brodeur, Chris Beckford-Tseu, Tyler Plante

kristin said...

oooooooof.

Bryan said...

$230 for that. ya. thanks habs. fuck youyou fuckersssss