Saturday, November 07, 2009

Vinny vide vice - Lightning game preview and open thread

Let's step back to both last spring and last summer when The Cavalier was the subject of all sorts of rumours (since confirmed) that Bob was trying to get him to Montreal. Any idea what this team would have looked like this year? Vinny leading the first line with Tanguay on his wing? It's a Bertrand Raymond wet dream! Well, you and BR can imagine what that would have been like tonight as those two skate together on Bell Centre ice.

Waiting in line details - 7 PM at the Phone Booth, on CBC for those of you who don't live in CBC Leafs country. So like, everyone but Quebec? These teams are pretty equal - sitting on the Eastern conference bubble, hanging around .500. Clash of the titans.

Pay your cover charge to - Raw Charge is "the static cling that brings Tampa Bay Lightning fans together." I like to think of FHF as the virtual strip club that brings Habs fans together.

Hot sexy Habs to watch - Carey? Price? Maybe? My god did he show something in our last game. Will it continue? Has he turned some sort of corner? Ha, I keed. It's one fucking game. Let's see. Pleks and Squid continue to tie the team lead with 14 points. Métro is almost a point per game over his last 8 games, and 2 goals over his last 3 games. He's our secondary scoring now.

Skanky Habs to watch - can we call the Urologist a failure yet? No points in 6 games. Where was he on the 5 on 3 the other night? His "defense" is a joke. The Subbanator could do the job better, and with better post-game quotes.

Hot sexy Bolts to watch - Stamkos leads the Bolts with 17 points. St. Louis right behind at 16. After a slow start, Tangy has 6 points over his last 6 games. Some decent goaltending too, with Niittymaki 1-0-2, 1.60, .950 in his last 4.

Skanky Bolts to watch - D Andrej Meszaros pointless in 6.

On the main stage - Usual suspects on the shelf for the Habs. Rhino was seen yesterday "skating vigorously." Bolts will be deprived of prized rookie Victor Hedman, victim of a nasty (though I think legal) Chris Neil hit Thursday. No real lineup notes as of this writing, but I'm guessing TFS will be between the stripper poles.

In the VIP Room - I don't know if you've caught the little Mad Max - McSplooge cat fight going on. Basically McSplooge thinks Mad Max is a pussy. Max denies it. Anyway, what's really lost here is that Mad Max and his compatriote Gui:( are playing like shit. They've been given chance after chance, especially as Pleks' wingers, temps de glace up the wazoo, and are doing nothing except sucking. Gui has 3 points for fuck's sake, Max 5. Wake the fuck up, 'stie.

Post-game adult entertainment establishment - Walking home from work the other day I noticed a very large sign on Ste Catherine for Club Temptation. Is it new? Did they just get a big sign? Did one of the other places rename itself? I need to investigate further.

Join me in the comments wishing GoldenGirl11 a hearty Mazel Tov for her son's bar mitzvah today. I have it on good authority Mr. Dr. GG11 forced her to leave her iPhone at home from synagogue this morning, but I bet she sneaks out of the party tonight to watch the game and comment.

60 comments:

Chenny13 said...

As much as I hate to say it, McSplooge is right. Max is a little bitch. But I have to say, he's a funny little shit. Now if only he could get on the scoresheet...

moeman said...

Nowhere

Well we don't know where Tampa's goin'
But we know where Tampa's been
And Vinny knows what we're knowin'
But he can't say they're hasbeens
And their owners are little children
And they don't know what they want
And their future is uncertain
Will they get time to bail out?

Vinny's on a road to nowhere
Vinny come to our side
Vinny's takin' a ride to nowhere
Vinny come share our ride

Carey's feelin' okay this mornin'
And you know,
We're on the road to TFS™ pair-a-dice
Here we go, Go Habs Go

Our Habs are on a ride to +.500
Or maybe they'll slide
Tanguay, Stamkos and St. Lou could
Fuck up that ride

Some of us wonder who Jay LeaCH is
I don't really care
Once P K Subban lines up
He'll take us there...take us there

MAB's on a road to nowhere
Gu:('s on a road to nowhere
Harel's on a road to nowhere

There's a great hockey city in my mind
Come along FHFers and take a fucking ride
and it's all right, baby, it's all right

And it's not very far away
And it's growing Olé by Olé
And it's all right, GG, Mazel Tov

Would you like to iPhone along
and help me sing this song?
And it's all right, lg, it's all right

I can tell you what I'll do
And uncork a Malbec just for you
And it's all right, Moey, it's all right

bobcole's on a road to nowhere [x2]
brunet's on a road to nowhere [x10]
HNIC's on a road to nowhere [x100]
bertrand's on a road to nowhere [x200]
réjean's on a road to nowhere [x500]
McSplooge's on a road to nowhere [x1000]

Ben Dugas said...

Can someone explain to me why Subban never even gets considered for a call-up?
Isn't he supposed to be awesome?
Is he too young (20)? Is he not good enough defensively? Does it have something to do with his contract or clearing waivers?
And while we're at it, does anyone understand the waiver system? I think we all pretend to but all we really understand is that sometimes teams take players from other teams because they were placed on waivers.

Shutdown said...

Subban doesn't need to come up. let him play in the A. Latendresse could've used it.
Carle has payed his dues, and he's looking alright in the show.

And I understand waivers, for I am all that is man.

Pete said...

Long time listener, first time caller... I've been trying to keep up, but who the hell is the Urologist?
Pete

moeman said...

L'Urologist is M-A Bergeron, a PeePee 'specialist' and not muCH else. He got his D skills via a correspondence course. He should be locked in the trunk of a car.

HabScot said...

Isn't "Club Temptation" the former "Chateau du Sexe" as was opposite the Paramount/Banque Scotia whatever movie theatre?

Olivier said...

Moeman: Patience, Carle is working on it. Shouldn't take much more than 2 other games (a lot, I know, but Carle is a rookie, give him a break!)

Moey said...

Good song Moeman, you should put out a CD for Christmas! Songs in the key of Moeman.

GoldenGirl11 said...

Proud to say that bar mitzvah boy was offered $200 by his uncle from Toronto to say "Go Leafs" during his speech and he refused.

Off to go drinking with Mom of 29.

Moey said...

@GG11,

Mazel Tov!

moeman said...

On hnic, is a kesselkake.

HabsFan29 said...

@moeman - fine work as usual

@habscot - yeah, i think you may be right about Chateau du sexe

@GG11 - look out for mom. pound for pound, she can drink almost anyone under the table

ok let's do this thing

Michael said...

@GG11: Mazel tov from all your friends at HIO. Mafter warbled without incident? If you had to compare: Charles Prévost Linton or René Rancourt? Anyone lose an eye during candy bombardment? Re "go leafs", hope response was "Thanks, unc, but here's $20 if you'll blow me."

HabsFan29 said...

do habs fans have to deal with bob cole on cbc?

HabsFan29 said...

we're close to a minyan around here

Michael said...

Can't stick around for the minyan. Gotta live blog. I'll ask Cammalleri if he's busy.

Jimmy G said...

@moeman
"He got his D skills via a correspondence course."
That made me giggle. He makes Gill look like Paul Coffee sometimes. How many times has he fallen, or almost fallen, on his ass?

HabsFan29 said...

leetch, Brett, Stevey Y, Luc. quite a roundtable

GoldenGirl11 said...

@Michael
Hard to wrap my head around 1 year of fighting for 10 minutes of singing but kid was Pretty good. No loss of eyes but nailed 3 of 4 kids right on the head with kosher stale taffy. Very satisfying. I'll pass along the come back advice and await his first detention.

@29
I'll post after every drink

moeman said...

Its 7:11, why hasn't GG11 posted yet?

GoldenGirl11 said...

@Michael
And thank you!

HabsFan29 said...

oy, it is bob cole. im sure it will be balanced by carbo though

Moey said...

That chick's warbling is hurting my cats' ears and mine.

Chenny13 said...

There go all my wine glasses.

moeman said...

Some czeCH sausage would be nice.

Chenny13 said...

Pur Laine Orgasm on Tampa's front line...Bertrand will surely request to swap top lines.

moeman said...

Does Tampa's première pure ligne cost more than our multi-ethnic one?

WV = wigged, as in that anthem singer wigged me out.

Moey said...

Opera and hockey do not mix.

Chenny13 said...

They're actually a good 5M cheaper, per the numbers on NHLSCap. Tanguay's only at 2.5 which is what makes the difference.

Tom said...

My compliment of the use of the picture today. I'm pretty sure that's former WWE Diva Ashley Massaro. Why they let her go, I'll never know.

moeman said...

rds' Tampa player pics looked like murderers row.

moeman said...

ack

Chenny13 said...

By the way, in case anyone needs a feed, this dude broadcasts every Habs game (RDS Feed) in pretty good quality:

http://www.justin.tv/nad_et_pic_4

moeman said...

ugh

Chenny13 said...

Gio! About time the PP nets us one.

moeman said...

Now to score 5on5, in 2009.

kevincrumbs said...

@Chenny13: Thanks for the link.

I'm a Center Ice subscriber but I'm in bed since I'm feeling a little under the weather. I also managed to share multiple alcoholic beverages last week with someone who was just confirmed with H1N1 yesterday. Fuck me.

moeman said...

Weird.

Chenny13 said...

@KC

Rough luck. Feel better soon pal!

Not sure what decision they're going to make on this one...Could go either way.

Chenny13 said...

Well that sucks.

Tom said...

Should never have been a goal. There's nothing that shows the goal was scored before the net came off, and in that case, it goes to the call on the ice (which was no goal).

These refs tonight are brutal as well.

Moey said...

Well at least we're not done yet, one good thing about this years' edition, they can come back.

Matt D said...

Last week, pre-Boston game, I started publicly declaring that I thought Price flat-out sucked. He then stole us a game in seriously 'fuck-you' style. So: I hereby publicly declare that Carry Price is a shitty goalie. The pits. Terrible.

Matt D said...

Oh, and now the Leafs are up 3-0 on the Wings. Kill me.

moeman said...

Moey knows but this team cannot score 5on5, not at all.

Moey said...

@Matt D,

Kill me too.

@ moeman, tell me about it. What really pisses me off is we're still in the same boat with secondary scoring as last year. Fuck.

Matt D said...

MAB is the oddest player. There is some basic, bantam-level shit that he simply cannot do AT ALL: clear the crease, body-check, win a 1-on-1 battle, not die in the corner. I'm pretty sure that the reanimated corpse of Doug Harvey could do a better job.

But he can do some things really, really well-- break-out passes, skate the puck out of trouble, start transition. Which makes me wonder-- why the hell is he a defenceman?

Carbo would definitely have him playing wing on the 1st line by now, which would allow for resurrecting FHF's best ever tag.

Moey said...

Carbo is such a refreshing change over McSplooge.

Matt D said...

Hey asshat on the cell phone in the 4th row: sit the fuck down. No one gives a fuck that you're on TV.

GoldenGirl11 said...

Party is better than the game. Mom29 is currently dancing on the sweet table.

Chenny13 said...

Yea, you're not missing much at this game. Just one of those nights...

moeman said...

sigh

Moey said...

This one is ova.

Chenny13 said...

Well, it's kind of the refs to finish the game 3:30 early. Not like we wanted to play it out or anything. How sporting of them.

moeman said...

Nittomaki'ed.

Moey said...

Leafs 5-1 over Wings. Is there a full moon tonight?

Moey said...

They're splooging all over the leafs on HNIC, plan the fucking parade. I have to go, I'm gonna barf.

Sleepy said...

I propose a new name for 'The Urologist' ... "Brisbois"

Anonymous said...

ha! they just asked JM why laps and latendresse were benched in the third and he answered: "well, we needed to score a goal so..." BURN! lol