Friday, November 05, 2010

Habs Double Down This Weekend: Sabres and Senators Mega-Meal Preview

Since this double downer of boring Buffalo and the snore-inducing Sens JUST FRIGGING HAPPENED (hey, schedule makers: 29 other teams in the league ... wanna mix it up a little?) we're not dignifying this mess with two previews. It's time to double up with the Mega Meal Double Down preview.

Where you get your wings: On Friday, get them in Buffalo at the HSBC around 7:30. On Saturday, lets get them in Montreal at La Cages Aux Sports after the Habs BEAT THE EVER LOVING FUCK OUT OF SOMEONE FOR CHRISSAKES GOMEZ AND GIONTA WE WANT FREE WINGS!!!! Also, RDS, CBC, yadda yadda yadda.

Hot like the Spicy Big Crunch: Oft injured Sabre centre Tim Connolly has 5 points in his last six. Diving crybaby Derek Roy leads the Sabres with 13 points in the same amount of games. Saturday's Sens feature ageless Daniel Alfredsson (11 points in 8 games) and Carrie Underwood's hubby, lucky sumbitch Mike Fisher (4 points in last 4, buried the Leafs himself on Wednesday.) Jason Spezza had a goal and three assists versus the Isle on Thursday. Sens are a hot team in general, winners of 5 of 6.

When the Habs score one goal in 120 minutes versus freaking Florida and Columbus, nobody gets Spicy Big Crunch Hot status.

Cold like your fries after walking back to your office from the food court: Uh, Giant Mexicans? Yeah. Them. Powerplay? Yep. Is everyone else getting dragged into the cold right now? Kinda. Chocula is trying to put things on the warming tray by creating a Giant Mexican Tits line (oh, the possibilities for this blog!) and giving Pleks a Danish Squid (oh, the possibilities for this blog!) At the back, Markov and soon to be overrated since everyone talks about how underrated he is Josh Gorges team up, with PFK taking his show out with Hal Gill. Oh look, ice cold Czech Spacecakes are still on the menu!

For les Sabres, Thomas Vanek must get the Gomez "he hasn't scored in two games, he's wildly overpaid!" treatment a lot. He's got company in sophomore slumping giant Tyler Myers. Sabres are the anti-Sens, losers of four straight. Sens big free-agent acquisition Sergei Gonchar is at a point per game pace but he was minus 7 before Thursday's game. Memories of his wave at Travis Moen in last year's playoffs abound. Kovy is more bad Kovy than good Kovy right now.

Tumbled around, bruised and squished like your popcorn chicken after the drive-thru kid drops your order: Habs relatively unbroken right now. Sabres emo-kid/wunderkind goalie Ryan Miller doubtful with lower body injury, and pint-sized Nathan Gerbe broke his jaw when he ran into Myer's knee in the dressing room. Sens Filip Kuba has a broken leg and Milan Michalek might be out with a knee.

Read the menu for caloric meltdown statistics here: Senators Los Cojones remains the KFC Original Recipe of Sens bloggers: consistent no matter the season, a little dangerous to your health, loaded with cholesterol, possibly better sauced - er, with sauce. Die By the Blade is the KFC Wings of Buffalo's bloggers: kinda familiar (they are an SBNation site) but just different enough to make it spicy and interesting.

Post-game heartburn recovery: In Buffalo heartburn gets washed away with a sixer of Gennesee Light and another order of wings. In Montreal it gets washed away next morning as you scrub stripper glitter off yourself in the shower. Both methods have their merits.

171 comments:

HabsFan29 said...

SO much win in this post and pic

that stripper glitter is a nightmare to get off

the Maritimer said...

Red Alert! Habs facing another Quebecois goalie!

Just sayin'.

soperman said...

I am having a cardiac arrest with all the strippers and deep fried chicken. I hope they have RDS in ICU.

iRiRi said...

I actually had a good feeling about tonight's game before I heard about Pleks. We'll see.

Awesome pic + preview!

In keeping with the KFC theme, here's PFK 's brand new Nike commercial.

P.S. Anyone actually try the Double Down yet?

moeman said...

Everything is better with bacon!

too close to toronto said...

@iRiRi - yes, i have. and it's delicious. but i should probably also add that i absolutely love kfc. if you don't, you'll probably feel differently about it.

hate to be a stickler, but isn't that hillary duff in the pic - wife of mike comrie (who we will not be facing this weekend), and not carrie underwood, wife of mike fisher (who we will be facing this weekend)?

but i really do love the pic. :)

the Maritimer said...

@iRiRi,

I wouldn't dare to try and eat one of those things. I feel like I gain 2 pounds just looking at the picture!

the Maritimer said...

Over at another Habs site, someone pointed out the Habs face Lalime tonight, possibly Leclaire tomorrow night and Bobby Lou on Tuesday. Anybody else nervous?

Habsfan10 said...

@ too close:

GG11 and I discussed the Duff pic, but we liked it better than any Carrie Underwood pic we found. Turns out that virginal little country singer has a lot less sultry lying down on a KFC sandwich pics than you might think.

L Dude said...

I didn't think it was possible, but you guys (and GG of course) really kicked it up a notch with the sexy Friday header and the Double Down pic and post!
Friday night in Buffalo. Ready for the 3rd snoozefest in a row from the Habs. Maybe the Giant Mexican Tit line will work this time. . And the turtle squid danish might be a nice appetizer. But, why oh why is Spaceman Spiff still playing D!? C'mon Chocula, let's count. One! One useless czech d-man. Two! Two useless Czech d-men! AH AH AH!!!!!!

Later dudes. GOYOUFUCKINGNONSCORINGSONSOFBITCHESHABSGO!

ACK! At first glance I thought my WV was antihab. it's anitinab. That reminds me. I need a nap.

Moey said...

Eating that sammy would make me feel like a snake that just swallowed a small antelope. Please pass the alka-seltzer. *belch*

Orangeman said...

I'm going to play the Montreal PP drinking game. It's the only one recommended by AA.

WV: bioming. When Wyoming starts to feel attracted to Canada, too.

HabsFan29 said...

ok let's get this over with! er, ok let's get this show on the road!

HabsFan29 said...

FINALLY

Lalime 3.45 and .881 on the season. tonight: 1.00 .950

HabsFan29 said...

hey good defensive play by spatCHes. credit where it's due

Orangeman said...

Sigh.

moeman said...

Are they playing the Devils?

moeman said...

PFKaboom!

HabsFan29 said...

this game's going nowhere fast.

aw, crap. what a mess

Orangeman said...

Sigh.

Moey said...

Putrid.

HabsFan29 said...

G & G were an embarrassment in the offensive zone before that goal

HabsFan29 said...

MAZEL TOV

Halpern's our best player this year

Orangeman said...

Si----gh?

moeman said...

Mex and Gio are CHoking their sticks.

Halp0rn!

Dainer's Hubris said...

That had to have been Brunet's best 'Oy-oy-oy's' ever.

And now, buffalo wings for seder!!

Ronan said...

Hey Mexican,


FUCKING SHOOT SOMETIMES YOU FUCK


Gionta musta spent 2005-2006 banking goals in off Gomez' head, because I can't fathom how he could ever pop 33 of his own accord.

Scratch that. Gomez would have to go near the net for Gionta to bank them off him.

Steve said...

i AM THE only sports fan in the world without cable, yet I exist. Likewise in a metaspherical world so does Buffalo. My point is where the cable connects but there is nothing there is just like not having cable. So to beat or lose to Buffalo or Columbus is like playing in Hamilton. IF you are confused, see Buffalo Bills, they play in Toronto when its cold. Can you think of a bigger loser scenario

The other teams they come in saying, this team has no home, we can not lose to homeless. We lost to Columbus, ack ack ack. Tits he dont know Buffalo, he dont Know Columbus, and that is the very thing that makes him rich and makes us poor.

iRiRi said...

@ too close + the maritimer - can you believe that thing is $7?! Give me a coronary AND steal my wallet!

It would probably make me sick and yet, I'd still be willing to try it.

Haven't sat down to watch the game yet. How do they look out there?

moeman said...

iRiRi, don't do it! Buy a dozen cupcakes instead. Or 7 99¢ iP4 Apps.

Moey said...

Are we looking better? I'm cooking a T-bone on the BBQ. Grrr. God forbid I over cook it.

HabsFan29 said...

Moey I'd say we're not looking worse. I'm not sure we're looking better

mmm, T-Bone

iRiRi said...

@moe - Ha! As a matter of fact, I would prefer some red velvet cupcakes!

Orangeman said...

Wait, did the Habs just get two penalties for that? How did Gorges even get a penalty? I don't really know what Markov did either.

iRiRi said...

Is PleXXXe playing?

HabsFan29 said...

it's a battle of titanic power plays tonight

HabsFan29 said...

hey Gomez shot a puck!

HabsFan29 said...

@iRiRi - iNo

moeman said...

@iRiRi, nope, no PleXXXian sausage passes tonite.

HabsFan29 said...

crap that was pathetic

iRiRi said...

iCrap

Moey said...

@29,

It was a beastly thing, you could have shared it with Mr. M.

Fuck, Buffalo just scored.

moeman said...

CHicken!

iRiRi said...

iCHicken!

HabsFan29 said...

CHicken!

Orangeman said...

ok boys, you don't have to wait for them to score for you to go to the net.

On the positive side, this is the most they've scored in a week.

Steve said...

No Plexxxx so more lego, lego please break through, like your child porn statue and your peeing beer. Your blocks are made with oil so do not be so pure, so lego, score one for the crew that keep choucla breathing when the sun shines on a monicor so dour.

In Summary, Lego I like I played with as a kid, Choula he scared me and I never learned to read.

Moey said...

@Steve,

Can I have some of whatever you're having?

moeman said...

Steve is digesting a double-down.

moeman said...

CHicken doubles down.

iRiRi said...

Double Down!!!

Moey said...

Beauty!!

moeman said...

Marry me iReeRee.

Orangeman said...

I have no idea how the Habs are leading this game right now. Really, I mean that. The pace of this game has forced me to read the Huffingtonpost in another window. The Huffingtonpost people.

But, you know, GYFHG and so forth.

Slalom From said...

Fire chicken is in the house!

HabsFan29 said...

so is this the Kosher CHicken line?

moeman said...

Will rds mention that CHicken has more goals than Gu:( ?

iRiRi said...

@moe - Great minds think alike!

It's all up to Carey to hold on to that lead now. No pressure. Just kidding... kinda.

moeman said...

@iRiRi, is that a yes?

orangeman has been born again throught temporary internet interruption said...

I just had a Wonderful Life moment.

I've been cynical about the team all week, perhaps longer. But now I faced a life without the Habs. I flashed back to Korea where I the thought of darkness outside and a beer for the game delighted me to no end. The happiness on my family and friend's faces when I finally joined them for a game here. The joy of attending a game at the Molson...ok, that was a bust. But it was fun! I was drunk, that's something!

I will never doubt my Habbies again. I'm sorry for doubting you, for taking you for granted. I will drink merrily, I will cheer every pass, no matter what opposing player's stick it lands on.

I CHOOSE LIFE!

Wait, I think I'm confusing movies. You get the point.

GO HABS GO!!!!!!!!!!!

Steve said...

What the NHL fears most, a Chicken with teeth, GYFH.

Chicken, I love you, like a perfect happy meal, and I am not talking about Macdonalds on Sexy Friday.

HabsFan29 said...

Carey! there you iGo RiRi

iRiRi said...

@moe - iDo :)

moeman said...

@iRiRi, iFaint!

moeman said...

iCing

orangeman is remaining positive goddamn it said...

GO YOU GUYS!

I BELIEVE IN YOU!

GOOD EFFORT!

Never thought I'd return to my former job as a special ed teacher.

JUST KIDDING!

GO HABS GO!

GO CAPS LOCK GO!

HabsFan29 said...

the Kosher CHicken PP was the best our PP has looked in weeks

iRiRi said...

Devils lose again. *snickers*

orangeman is being realistic said...

This is it! This time is for us! I believe!

Ok, ok, this is hurting my teeth. Still, good effort this 3rd period. I'm enjoying myself. I'm sure the sudden introduction of whiskey has nothing to do with this.

moeman said...

o-man your teeth may hurt but my ears bleed every time joel has something to say. Even his crazy hands freak me out.

moeman said...

Find the snake that has bitten our boys and kill it FFS!

iRiRi said...

Ha! They said Gill was lying on the puck on purpose. I actually believe it took him that long to get up.

moeman said...

One gets the feeling that Squid misses PleXXXe.

orangeman is hugging his fellow Habs fans a la the end of Wonderful Life said...

Chicken's been a Hen tonight!

I have no idea what that means....

iRiRi said...

Don't we all?

HabsFan29 said...

whew!

i feel like CHicken tonight

iRiRi said...

iWin!!!

moeman said...

A win that tastes like CHicken.

8-4-1 is finger lickin good.

orangeman can't think of anything clever to say said...

One thing I will never get tired of is when there are more Hab fans in the visiting building than home fans.

moeman said...

One down, double to go.

Oleg Petrov said...

A goal and two assists - does that make tonight Halpurim?

Howard said...

It's a CHicken delight!

Number31 said...

Just got back from the Bell Center and a glorious ass kicking of the BingoSens. OK the only reason it was a close game was because Gigantor the Goalie was in nets for them. Seriously, Bingo managed to get their 2nd shot sometime halfway through the 2nd period while the Dogs were already up to over 20. Ryan White's goal was glorious.

My brother was going into shock that Pouliot was close to a Triple-Down. Our new first line?

CHewbakka Bluetooth said...

Halpern = bacon? (he continually plays on the shabbos anyway.
that means Darche = CHeese. CHeese Darche has a ring to it...

the Maritimer said...

New No.1 line = SuperCHicken, Green Lamplighter and McGill Man.

GYFH!!!

wv= Rudolph the rodense reindeer...

the Maritimer said...

That being said, I'm sure GG11 can find appropriate costumes for the new No.1 line.

BJG said...

Living in the US of A, I am freed from the boys at RDS, but have to survive all the local Skips, Trips and Kips calling the game for whatever idiotic sunbelt team is carrying the game on Center Ice. (This also means having to watch the same Habs-24 cups-montage every game and having Chip call Jean Beliveau 'Classy' every game).

Being subjected to Rick Jenrette last night, I endured hearing Jaro being called 'Spa-CHUCK' time and again, despite the man just having played 3 seasons for the Sabres. I realized that, of course, poor demented Jenrette still thinks he's calling games for Hawerchuk, Andreychuk and Malarchuk.

At least I'll get the CBC feed tonight...Wait...Bob Cole...Shit, Forget it.

BJG said...

I just read (um, elsewhere) the line being dubbed 'PhD'. Not bad. DarCHe is a MGill boy, Halpern must be a doctor, lawyer or, at the very least, an accountant, and Benoit...Well, he still has time to study for his GED.

swarkles said...

Ah BJG, you and me both. Though I'd choose RDS over MSG, FSN (or worse Comcast Sportsnet) any day.

moeman said...

If this doubled-down thread goes over 200 posts do we get the meth ice cream?

moeman said...

Also.

G Y F H !

L Dude said...

Doth mine eyes deceive me? Habs full network on HNIC? It cannot be so! (double checks) And yes, the Laple Meafs ARE playing also. Course, I suppose we'll still get the Cole/Galley/Millen combo or some such lovely equivalent.

anywhat, GYFH.

L Dude said...

...of course my HD feed is the fucking laffs. So RDS HD or CBC in low def?

I like the PhD line. Not sure if it was Boone that penned that? But it fits cuz that line plays smart hockey.

I see Iggy's getting the blame in Cowtown. Wonder if they would like to swap for a certain Mexilaskan?

iRiRi said...

@ L Dude - We get Lee/Weekes/Peacock. Cole and Galley are doing the TO game.

BJG said...

@eL Dude - Both Stubbs and a kid at HFBoards are claiming Trademark for PhD. I see it going to court. I fear the judge, in a Solomonic decision, will call for the line to be cut in half. I don't know which of the of the three would be bifurcated. The obvious choice is Halpern, as he is both the center and, being a Member Of The Tribe, the only one who has heard of Solomon. Then again, CHicken slices more easily.

GoldenGirl11 said...

@BJG
RDS but pregame dinner with the folks. Maybe hit a sports bar after because no one loves hockey like mom of GG11.

HabsFan29 said...

ok let's get this thread to some meth ice cream already. i NEED my meth ice cream dammit!!!!

/jonesing

Flying Toaster said...

can we get some Giant Mexican Tits action please? it'd be lovely. if not, meth icecream sounds nice... (also, you rub the glitter off. or you rub one off with stripper glitter? )

HabsFan29 said...

@FT - i'll keep my stripper glitter activities private, thank you very much

ok let's get it on already! i'm so bored i'm watching horse racing. go Zenyatta Mondata! (whoever you are)

Number31 said...

GYFH!!!! And score some fucking goals!

HabsFan29 said...

well Zenyatta Mondata was 2nd. not surprising, Outlandos D'Amour was a much better album

Orangeman said...

The Habs don't have enough of their own ceremonies, they actually delay the puck drop so we can watch the ones in Toronto.

wv: pumpling. This delay will give me time to do some pumpling.

HabsFan29 said...

i was gonna complain about pre-game ceremonies, but then Scotty Bowman shows up.

Orangeman said...

I'm sorry, I don't care if this makes me sound biased. The Hall of Fame is meant for certain people only, once we open the doors to all these others the allure is diluted. It's not popular, but I just have to say it:

Americans should not be allowed in the Hall of Fame.

ti-cul said...

one channel has the blewette, the other fucktard la cerise, which is worst?

HabsFan29 said...

@O'man - but Cammi looked gooood

HabsFan29 said...

no Bob Cole!!! that's something

ti-cul said...

GO LES FUCKING HABS!!!

HabsFan29 said...

Giant PleXXian Squid. we'll see how that goes

HabsFan29 said...

we look discombobulated. what else is new

ti-cul said...

that was bullshit

HabsFan29 said...

yes! a PP! i mean uh, a pp

Number31 said...

Can someone tell me why no one ever seems ready to collect a pass from Price?

Flying Toaster said...

isn't brett hull.......... holy JESUS CHRIST! hottest girl i've ever seen, cutest accent i've ever heard when she speaks french, all the way down from koweiit to stay with her sister for a month. JUST as im abourt to ask her for her phone number so i can show her around town some drunken prick walks into the store and is being loud and obnoxious, totally killing the mood and she walks out. damnit! now where was i? oh yeah. isn't brett hull amercan?

HabsFan29 said...

yes1 a 5 on 3!! i mean, uh, a 5 on 3

HabsFan29 said...

a penalty on a 5 on 3. i have no words

HabsFan29 said...

sure, that's a little high

iRiRi said...

FFS

ti-cul said...

gomez?

iRiRi said...

I want the drugs Sather was on when he gave Mex that deal.

HabsFan29 said...

AAAUUUGHHH

HabsFan29 said...

this game has a little zip at least

Number31 said...

This is the most erratic, confusing period of hockey ever. Total clownshoes.

HabsFan29 said...

crap

Orangeman said...

After all that, that's what goes in?

Number31 said...

Man...Hamr is a pylon. For some reason when he's at the blue line, pucks just walk by him and he doesn't notice until they're down the ice already. Then he leisurely takes his time to get back, leaving Price to get the puck, while two players from the other team are in front of him...

HabsFan29 said...

Ca-rey! Ca-rey!

HabsFan29 said...

this is not particularly good hockey

Number31 said...

Price saving their asses again.

HabsFan29 said...

thank God for TFSaviour right now

HabsFan29 said...

crap

iRiRi said...

They're gonna get shut out again, right?

HabsFan29 said...

iAgree with iRiRi

Orangeman said...

They look just terrible out there. Totally out of it. Lost, even.

Number31 said...

Sigh. Why is it the other goalie never has a rough time to make saves while ours has to not only deal with the other team but his own team?

iRiRi said...

Oh, what the hell. Anyone know how long oatmeal cookies are supposed to bake?

iRiRi said...

NO SHUTOUT!

HabsFan29 said...

i dont know who that bounced off of but i dont give a fuck it's a goal

Number31 said...

I think Spacek just scored.

HabsFan29 said...

uh oh we may have iJinxed it

Orangeman said...

Point it, it's a goal motherfucker.

HabsFan29 said...

whew

iRiRi said...

Hell yeah, good goal!

Orangeman said...

EST LA BUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUT!

HabsFan29 said...

nice acting sergei

Orangeman said...

How the fuck is that a penalty? What the hell?

Number31 said...

Not a penalty. Ref you suck.

Orangeman said...

I'm getting very tired of Gio and Gomez. You pass that back why? Just throw it on net. It just worked for you!

HabsFan29 said...

i've figured out our problem - we can't generate offence. that's easily fixed, right?

Number31 said...

Gomez shoots on net hoping, praying someone will get the obvious rebound on the other side BUT...no one is ever there so meh.

Orangeman said...

How is it interference if he has the puck? I think I've figured out the Sens gameplan. Fall down, look back at ref with puppydog eyes.

HabsFan29 said...

crap. not more kovy. game over

Orangeman said...

It was inevitable with a PP every 2 minutes.

iRiRi said...

Ugh.

Here's a thought. Where would this team be if they had kept Halak and let Pleks walk? I'm thinking bottom of the standings.

Orangeman said...

C'mon! All we need is a powerplay to get back in the game!

/puts meth ice cream back in freezer

Number31 said...

Hey look! Traffic in front of the net works! Except when the Habs try that, all they hit are their teammates...

Orangeman said...

They seem scared to just freaking shoot the puck. Yes, a 2 on 1, wait till you're behind the goaline to make a halfassed pass to no one. AGAIN. The one time they just put it on net it went in. Learn, you motherfuckers!

Number31 said...

Pouliot's quota done last night.

HabsFan29 said...

Gio! Friggin miracle!

iRiRi said...

GIO!!!

Please don't be a tease!

Orangeman said...

I was just thinking something evil about Gio. I'll take it mentally back.

Alright boys, one more!

Number31 said...

CAPTAIN AMERICA! I've never been happier!

iRiRi said...

Where was THIS team hiding?

HabsFan29 said...

meh

iRiRi said...

OF COURSE IT WAS A TEASE.

Orangeman said...

Who was that halfassedly going for that icing? Jesus, put some fucking effort into it.

Hate to say it, but Markov looks like he's still injured or something. Not playing well at all.

At least they made it a game.

Orangeman said...

I'm not leaving until I get meth ice cream.

Number31 said...

Markov's got the meth.

Orangeman said...

Well, Toronna loses. The night isn't a complete waste, especially hearing the pain in Cole's voice.

Oleg Petrov said...

@Flying Toaster - Brett Hull is American but he's also Canadian - born in Belleville, I think, but grew up in the States - played for them internationally because he couldn't crack the Team Canada lineup and the American team was awful at the time. Dad is Canadian, I think Mom is American.

Flying Toaster said...

So last thing i heard on the Radio it was 2-1 for Sens... Unfortunately missed the rest of the game because i got into a really bloody fight with some fucking thief -_-

Sounded like an exciting, if somewhat frustrating/confusing game. And since i live in Hull/Gatineau, when they play the Sens is pretty much the only time i get to listen to the game on the radio, considering it's the local team and all.