Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Habs are totally Lost - Caps Game Preview and Open Thread

I'm a Sun fan, especially with her new 2007 badass attitude. Do you prefer Kate? Claire? Dead babes like Shannon, Ana Lucia, Nikki, or Charlotte? Man I love this show.

Seriously, this team is Lost. Wayward. The sky is falling. The Black Rock is sinking. You know the metaphors. Anyway you slice it, I only wish the Habs could flashback to the mid-70's. Here's a preview for those of you who will be watching the game, while I'm watching to see if the Oceanic 6 get back to the island. So grab a glass of MacCutcheon and dive in.

Waiting to enter the numbers - 7:30 PM start in Washington. Available on TSN. Caps have taken two of three this year, including the Theo shutout I remember all too well. Habs have Lost 15 of their last 16 (or thereabouts).

The Others - I don't think I need to introduce you to A View from the Cheap Seats anymore. We all know CapsChick rules.

Hot like the Swan Station imploding - Captain K is playing OK. The rest of the team blows. Though I didn't see much of the West Caost trip, maybe we have some good players? Hahahaha.

Frozen like the wheel below the Orchid - Many, many players. TFS especially, who's getting the start. Let's hope Carbo hasn't scarred him forever, and his new old pads help.

As old as Richard Alpert - Mathieu Schneider makes his version 2.0 debut for the Habs.

Hot like Sawyer and Kate doing it in a cage - Ovie, Semin, Backstrom, Green. Like this is news?

Cold like Jeremy Bentham's body - Caps are good. No one here.

I don't know what the fuck is going on either - RDS has the following lineup. Try to keep track:

Big Tits-Pleks-Patches
El Dandy-Chips-BGL

Markov-The Semitic Saviour
Franky B-Gorges

The Dharma Initiative makes porn is your post-game adult entertainment (nsfw-ish, but not really).

Apologies to all the non-Lost watchers out there. Let me have it in the comments, I can take it; I'm tough like Ben.


Navin Vaswani (@eyebleaf) said...

No need to apologize at the end, there. Your team's fucked.

mr. gillis said...

I hate lost. Well, not hate, cause I never took the time to watch an episode. But I hate it when people talk about lost.

Anyway, take a look at the line-up. There are two solid checking lines. If only Carbo made lines like this all the time. I like it. Now just imagine, a Kovalev playing decently, and a healthy Gui! and PoonTang. I miss Tanguay. It should be good.

Anybody else beleive that Carbo is Bob's puppet, and in the last dozen games, Bob somehow lost control. Bob now has it back in control, I think. I don't know what I'm talkin about.

My word is "grack". As in: Carbonneau is on fuckin' grack.

L Dude said...

For a little good luck and fond memories, click here

DAMN! Bad karma with the word verification. outrap

Carbo will try to outrap (out trap) the Caps.

Habsfan10 said...

See, this is why I barely watch tv anymore. I have no idea what 29 is talking about. I think I've watched 20 minutes of Lost total, and all I could think was "why is Charlie Salinger from Party of Five yelling at Meriadoc Brandybuck? I quit right then and there.

Anonymous said...

I love LOST.

But I think the main reason I keep watching is to find out where the fuck that four toed statue came from...

I always have hockey games on Wednesday nights. This means I get to hear about how much the Habs suck and then watch them suck on RDS Express.


L Dude said...

Lost is stupid.
I like Fringe with the crazy scientist. Mind you, his odd quotes are the best thing about that show. Ahh, there's a lot of garbage on tv. Sports and porn - you're safe there.

Anonymous said...

Why is Pleks still in the second line? Isnt TheRock doing a better job then the Cinderella?

gazeux said...

Bunch of panicky petes..The lot of ya... GO HABS GO!

Anonymous said...

Lost is great! I hate when it is on the same night as a habs game.

Kate is the hottest btw.

Vintage HF29 said...

@hockeyzombie - almost used this pic

Anonymous said...

HF29, I love this preview. Can you do a BSG one next?

Verif: nersympo. I got nuthin'

Anonymous said...


No way in hell a line can be "checking" anything with BGL. Dude can't skate withe the rest of them. He'll tangle with Brashear and then watch him run circles around him for the remainder of the game.

Vintage HF29 said...

@Sonia - frak yes!

Jaybird said...

I absolutely love the "games since Carbonneau should have been fired" by the next game preview.

Vintage HF29 said...

Blogger seems to have fucked up there for an hour or two - sorry everyone. seems to be fixed

/crosses fingers, prays to Blogging Deity

rutbut said...

BGL and Brashear...

Wait. Brashear used to wear la sainte flanelle. Maybe throw a few draft picks at Washington...

Verification "sulin" - kinda sums it up lately.

lawyergirl77 said...

Instead of watching the horror, I've decided to go out for sushi and to see Slumdog Millionnaire. I hear that the movie is horrifying but uplifting in the end. At least there is a meaning behind the horror, unlike the show that the Habs have been putting on over the past few weeks.

Vintage HF29 said...

@rutbut - nice vid, thx. though there seemed to be more dancing than actual fighting

and i saw your comment on the now-vanished into the ether test post. thx for chiming in. kovy was traded an hour ago

mr. gillis said...

Have you guys read that thing about Kovy talking to the Russian newspapers on RDS. I'm hopin its all bullshit but I have the feeling its not.

To tell you the truth, if Kovy leaves Montreal, I will be really sad. I'll miss his little dingles and dangles. I'll miss his ability to skate around the other teams zone 20 000 times without losing the puck. I'll miss his perfect wristshots from the faceoff circle. I'll miss his way of making defencemen look like a bunch of idiots. But sadly, that all only happens half of the time. The other half of the time he's passing the puck to the other team, taking weakshots, making weak passes, not fighting for the puck, holds onto the puck until he has no one to pass to, thinks he can deke out the whole other team. But all this half good half bad stuff is part of Kovalev and part of the entertainment package. You never know what to expect, and I find that it makes it pretty fun to watch (but sometimes frustrating)

Anyway, Kovalev, please don't leave Montreal like this.

Q said...

Price has finally ditched those loser red pads. Did he ever win a game in those?

I'm feeling a win here tonight....

moeman said...

I'm all lost in this Centennial season
I can no longer cheer happily
I came in here for that special comment
The guaranteed FHF personalities

I was born a genuine Habs fan
Everyone seemed to notice me
We had a rink at home in the backyard
Ken Dryden is who I would be

I heard a leaf fan who lived round the corner
Scream and cry most scarily
Hearing that noise was my first ever fun feeling
Thats how its been all around me

I'm all lost in this Centennial season

I'm all tuned in, I see all the RDS programmes
Benoit Brunet is a sack of pee
I've got my giant Lafleur discoteque album
I empty a few Sleemans and I feel a bit free

The kids on the blog like the gals in the strip club
Make fun noises to keep me company
Long distance Finals for that 25th Stanley
And the Kovy silence makes me lonely

I'm all lost in this Centennial season

And its not here
It disappeared
I'm all lost

Mr. Plank said...

Best fucking post ever. What a show.

Vintage HF29 said...

moeman as usual you killed it

so this from HI/O (what gillis was talking about):

"According to RDS, citing Russian newspaper sources, Alex Kovalev does not expect to play another game for the Canadiens this season and has decided he will definitely not return to the team next year.

Kovalev also blames the actions of the younger players away from the ice for the team's problems and says the information that was revealed recently is onlt the tip of the iceberg.

Kovalev also said he wouldn't be surprised if he is traded soon by the Canadiens."

when we lose 8-1 tonight, this whole team is imploding, if it hasn't already

Anonymous said...

So what do I do with my Kovalev t-shirt now? Glad I didn't stock up on ShamWow's.

Anonymous said...

So I can watch the Habs and have a frustrating night at not knowing the answers to anything...

or I can watch Lost, and have a frustrating night at not knowing the answers to anything, but get to watch some hot women.

I vote for the latter.

moeman said...

Higgs 1-0.

Is Kovy CHeering at home?

Habsfan10 said...

Trade looks good to me.

Habsfan10 said...

Damn, did our comments pull a Kovy?

Habsfan10 said...

So, Lost episode is good, I take it.

fezworth said...

Holy Frak. That goal by Ovie.... Oh my. Oh my o my.

@Capschick - if you're in here tonight, I envy you. Even if the Habs win the next 3 cups in a row, I envy you for getting to watch that guy game in, game out.

What an absolute thing of beauty.

fezworth said...

Hey now... No Lost spoilers please. It's recording right now.

Anonymous said...

Second period put you all to sleep too, eh?

@Fezworth: You know, there are times that I can hardly believe I get to watch him night in and night out. And the scary thing is that just seeing him once in awhile doesn't even do justice to how amazing he is.

...okay, enough Ovieloving. You guys get the idea, he's the shit :D

fezworth said...

Jose Theodore: Does more for the Habs when he doesn't play for them.

That 3rd goal was a gift, and he knew it.

Bryan Driscoll said...

james duthie is the worst play by play guy ever hahah. love him though.

Anonymous said...

Who're these guys in white and what did they do with the slow, disinterested, fucking crappy team I love to hate?

They're not sucking. HF29, did you virtually send us all to The Island?

HabScot said...

Holy crap they're actually TRYING.

fezworth said...

It's a crappy way to end it, but what a game!

65 minutes of play, and they get a point out of it. It could be worse.

Anonymous said...

Well, that wasn't so bad.

Compared to Brisebois and O'Byrne, I have to say Schneider look like Lidstrom. Hamrlik being probably hurt, good thing he's on board.

Shout out to the Lapierre line, whose job was to cover Ovechkin's line. Didn't quite worked (and they let the tying goal in), but hey... Dude is 23 and everybody was pegging him as a 4th line RW. Looks like Chipchura's out of luck.

Felt good to actually enjoy watching a game...

My word is culturg. Meh.

kevincrumbs said...

You know, I enjoyed the game tonight. We didn't win but it was a matter of inches with Steckel's goal for the Caps. Price turned back into Carey from Scary and hey, we even won a few battles along the boards!

In the early going, I thought we were totally fucked but we looked alright. I fully expect a win against Pittsburgh.

(Sorry for the lack of snark)

Anonymous said...

From watching the game, you wouldn't know that the Canadiens have the worst record in the NHL over the past 15-odd games. Great effort... Pens better watch out.

So... Gainey gets tired of Kovy hamming it up and hogging the puck on the PP, so he snaps up Schneider to save our bacon, amirite?

Word verification: "bolyz", as in "Plekanec finally grew some bolyz, and almost won the game for us"

Victor said...

You guys can thank the Habs fans in section 114 for the loss. They started riding Theodore after the Habs first goal (for a one-goal lead), the after their second (to tie the game). Didn't notice after the third but I had earplugs in (due to ear injury).

Don't they know you don't start riding a goalie until he's given up three goals? Sheesh. Bad Karma, dudes.