Thursday, December 09, 2010

FHF adds another lawyer, stretches mathematical concept of "4" beyond all recognition


Faced with a dire shortage of lawyers on staff, FHF is pleased to announce that today we have added a new, lawyer-riffic member to the team. Well, not really new, in that this person is well known to all of you from the comments. Ladies and gentlemen, mesdames et messieurs, FHF's newest blogger... lawyergirl77!!!

LG77 brings an outstanding mix of hockey knowledge, sense of humour, anger and bitterness to the job. Anyone who has listened to a Pants!Cast knows all of these things are true. We are truly ecstatic to welcome LG77 to the writing team to see what she can come up with. She'll be making her debut this weekend with the high-profile HNIC Leafs-Habs review. So be sure to check in Sunday to see what she comes up with. No pressure, LG!

Now, as you may have guessed (or not), we have not made this call-up for no reason. I am a bit sad to have to tell you that Panger aka HFF33akaPanger has taken what I will call a "leave of absence" from FHF. I can't tell you much besides the fact it involves 3 hookers in the trunk of his car who may have overdosed on meth ice cream. Just before he bludgeoned them to death. Panger has not left FHF like what's-his-face, that other guy who used to write here. You know, that guy? Who's always standing and walking? Rory Calhoun? We look forward to Panger returning at some point down the road, we're just not sure when. Maybe somewhere between 25 and life. And in the meantime, he has promised to write the occasional guest post, assuming he can get internet access from Spy Hill Jail.

49 comments:

lehab said...

Welcome aboard lg77! It sure is nice you guys have such a good farm team and can keep calling up some new talent, because I'm not sure what I would do without FHF. Greatest blog around. Keep up the fan(sar)tastic work!

lawyergirl77 said...

Many thanks for the kinds words, peeps! LOVE the fact that there is a very girly drink in the masthead now. Wheeeee!!

bea.habs.fan said...

nioce to have more estrogen among all that testosterone.

lg will your review also be in 3-D?

Hadulf said...

Congrats LG77...

I hope this means more boobs.

GoldenGirl11 said...

@LG
If a manischewitz cork isn't girlie I don't know what is. Pillow fight after the game tomorrow?

Orangeman said...

Congrats LG. Maybe you can class this joint up.

Le Douze said...

Outstanding!! And you even look just like I imagined. Can you kick a hole in a Centre Bell ladies' room wall with your stilettos?

Looking forward to, finally, some cogent, insightful hockey analysis to balance the ranting and humour and strippers and meth and .... umm, I mean, SHOW US YOUR TITS!

(BTW, can I be banned for creating a hostile working environment for the blogging staff here? I guess with four-ish lawyers on staff, I'm sure to find out soon enough...)

Anyway, welcome aboard and I'm looking forward to seeing more of your stuff...

Mr. natural said...

AWWwwwwwwwwww PHuck another lawyer.

Can she class up the joint? Christ she can't make it any trashier, but please LG at least try.

BTW from listening to those pantscasts she should replace the Goat.

GYMFHG!

HAHAhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahha the LAffs yesterday, how super PHucken' sweet!


Die PHucktards Die!

moeman said...

Bienvenue lg77. Bring on the bitterness.

Also, 25 to live? WhoTF?! Is 33s lawyer? Does heat least have conjugal visitation rights?

L Dude said...

Yay! More girls. Everybody else has a number. I assume GG has 11 and moeman 9. Are you going to stick with Pierre Turgeon's 77? Or take it down a notch and go with a fresh 76? Or in honour of his recent and decent play, as with my new av, LEGO!
Catch him on the Habs' site? Play-doh or Lego? C'mon. Makes me wonder where that question came from.

L Dude said...

forgot 81

soperman said...

@LG77

Wow, you look just like Angie Harmon! Along with Jill Hennessey, she was the hottest Law & Order chick of all time. Are you going to sell tickets to the next Pants!Cast ?

I have a solution to your mathematics problem. If you subtract the "u" from "FourHabsFans" making the title "ForHabsFans" the title context becomes irrelevant to the number of bloggers on the big team!

Congratlations LG77, your Laffs - Habs review is anxiously awaited.

L Dude said...

I like Soperman's suggestion. Smart Maritimer that fella is. And no, that is not an oxymoron. Of course, before finishing reading it my first thought was FurHabsFans? Mind very briefly landed in the gutter (it doesn't take much as Mrs LD can attest to), but was quickly removed when I finished reading and figuring out ForHabsFans.

I see Martin is praising Weber. What do we call him? Is it Swiss Miss 2? How about Spidey? You know - because he's a 'weber'. Or #1, because he's acting as Picard's right hand man. Make it so.
Anywho, doesn't fare well for PK.

soperman said...

@ L Dude

It is okay to say "smart Maritimer" because "smart is a relative term - I could be smart relative to other Maritimers (not "the Maritimer" though) or you could avoid all controversy by saying "Smart-ass Maritimer" or, in Maritime lingo "Smart-arse Maritimer". It's all good.

Maybe we could call Weber, "BBQ" as in a Weber BBQ. meh.....

L Dude said...

Smart-arsed it is, bye.

iRiRi said...

Congrats LG! Can't wait to read your preview!

Steve said...

Congratulations LawyerGirl77, fuck the fucking leafs with fucking lawyer speak meshed with wit and hockey salt.

Mr. natural said...

@ L Dude & soperman: I think Spidey is pretty clever and garee with meh on BBQ

Mr. natural said...

....at this time I wish to correct garee to agree as though clinically retarded I am functional.

Holy PHuck I must be sober.

moeman said...

Her acting skills might be a bit wooden but Elisabeth Rohm can defend me anytime.

(So long as I don't get 25 to life).

Steve said...

Angie Harmon I had never heard of, she looks good but has right wing boobs of Palin. But she has soft spot for drunks so she cant be all bad.

Anonymous said...

@33
What?? Leaving? Say it ain't so! Don't stay away too, Panger. Your rants will be missed. Get a good lawyer and get back soon!

Bill 101 said...

Marvellous news.

Bring it on 77!!

wv: is 77 a game changr?

Bill 101 said...

p.s. GG - nice the way the lines of LG's drink line up with 10's bottle.

wv: I'd ingst either one right now

Allan Walsh said...

Does she need representation? It is apparent she is carrying this rag-tag army by herself.

Moey said...

Yay LG77! Girlpower! BRING IT ON!

Love the margarita on the header pic. Also, does this mean we get pictures of studly men on alternate sexy Fridays?

moeman said...

@ Moey, we'll give ya Sexy Sundays.

Orangeman said...

I wouldn't put too much stock into my memory, but isn't LG also a goalie?

L Dude said...

I tells ya, if Mrs LD ever comes to her senses and kicks me to the curb, next time I'd be shootin' for a woman with money or preferably somebody like you FHF ladies (Mrs LD hates hockey). Actually change or to and and I'm in heaven. You gals rock and make this site awesome. /suck up

iRiRi said...

GREAT idea, Moey!

LG & GG, make it happen. Please?

HabsFan29 said...

the CHicks are talking over. what have we done????

HabsFan29 said...

*TAKING over. the point still stands.

kidding. love ya ladies!

moeman said...

29 knows, we love the FHFemmes!

~~~

tsn's erudite panel discusses phil kessposito and what he does or doesn't bring to the leaf(minus 2 1sts and a 2nd pick). blob mackenzie and MacT offer reasonably (cough, Toronto media) honest comments, whilst ray feraROAR! freaks out in fear of Brian Bark and yips that people should leave Phil The Still alone. Too funny.

GoldenGirl11 said...

@Moey and iRiRi
Sexy Sunday, Premenstrual Monday... we have lots planned! Things around here are going to be hotter than..... uh.... me having a hot flash!

moeman said...

Now I gotta dig up my Boomtown Rats.

lawyergirl77 said...

Am currently driving to Quebec City to meet with a blabbermouth expert in a file that WON'T FUCKING SETTLE, DAMMIT and that, as such, is torpedoing my Christmas holidays.

The amazingly kind words from all of you made me smile in an otherwise shite day.

Many thanks. I hope I can live up to the hype... Or at least face plant in an amusing fashion.

@Orange - for the record, I was a goalie but a truly sucktastic, shitty one at best. Panger, a.k.a. HFF 33 was and is LIGHT YEARS better than I. And he still plays. Way more street cred - I hope to do a passable job filling the gigantic shoes he has left me to fill during his leave of absence.

Shit, now I gotta think of something to write for Sunday. *panic*

moeman said...

Drive safe lg.

Also, did you just tell us 33 has really big feet?

Moey said...

Yo moe! You watching this game too? My hatred is so torn between these two teams my head could easily explode,

Hey, why not get Kessel from the leafs?

moeman said...

Can't stand the flyers but truly hate the leaf. kessposito is a qurater the player Mex is.

moeman said...

qurater = quarter

Moey said...

@GG11,

Sounds great! Along with Tampax Tuesdays & Womens' troubles Wednesdays, this blog is gonna rock.

Orangeman said...

@LG77: Yes, but you bring the crazy like a goalie, right? On a completely unrelated note, I was also once a goalie, until they found a better one anyway.

WV: coctor. aka a urologist.

Orangeman said...

@Kmaxx: if you're still reading, re: CBC feed, you need to be in Canada. Sorry about that.

Habsfan10 said...

I always wanted to play goal. Dad of HF10 actually sat me down one day around age 6 and said "son, you don't want to play goal. Goalies are fuckin' crazy." The man was totally right, if not a little inappropriate with the language.

Mr. natural said...

PHucking site is not posting again!!!!!!!

Maybe LG can be in charge of IT and iron out glitches.

She can be the Barbra Streisand of the intertubes, the Shylock of the legal community, the Golda Meir of Bloggers, the ...I'll go away now........

Mr. natural said...

Yea worked!

ti-cul said...

condolence to Toronto who now has a mayor who suck as much as their hockey team.

Flying Toaster said...

GSP named Canadian athlete of the year? Huh! Can't wait till saturday... And i'm not talking about hockey.

Kmaxx said...

I know this isn't yet Sexy Friday - but I am reading tit at 8.00 am Friday in the UK - and Jill Hennessy was without a doubt the hottest ADA SVU ever had. Did Jack ever manage to crack her?...but I digress..

So welcome LG77 - Another commenter who has made it to the show! And like any team that stands still for too long, without injecting new blood FHF might have been running the risk of going off the boil. I've always loved and respected your comments, and I can't wait to read your blog posts.

@Orangeman - thanks for the feed update - I'll probably goes with RDS via atdhe for now.

Company Christmas party for me Saturday night - so I will miss the Laff Fest - Actually more concerned about the Wings tonight - this is the type of team we need to beat if we are to be taken seriously...

GYMFHG!!!