Thursday, March 31, 2011

Wasted management 101 ~ Habs are garbage in 6-2 loss to Canes ~ Game Review and Open trash thread

Reek ~ The game stunk from the get-go as the Habs polluted the ice with pathetic play.

Recycle ~ Here's an idea whose time has come, collectively try to cycle and recycle in the offensive zone. Enough with the garbage goals and wasted efforts of forty foot shots.

Recover ~ PatCHes! is doing better each day, RDS says he may be on skates by Saturday.

Rethink ~ Funduhmental flaws in The System™, noted. CHocula, whatever it is you are scribbling on that fucking notepad isn't worth wiping yourself with. Incinerate it.

Litter the ice ~ With boos at the next home game. No waffles though. Save those crepes for the last game.

Reduce ~ Cutback Lego's time to four minutes? Really?

Sceptic tank ~ Too late to can the recent end-of-season garbage. Throw out the trash this summer, unless of course some of it is composted and it feeds a new Flower.

To the Curb ~ Is our enthusiasm sunk at the FHF joint or what?! We need some freshening up.
Landfill ~ The methane collected from Montreal's March misery could fuel a fire but luckily Habs fans only do that during winning riots. I ain't dousing that hope just yet.

Pay as you Gomez ~ This toxic hazardous cocktail is costing the Canadiens environment. Climate CHange is real and we're melting like lg's Mexican Margarita.

Reuse ~ Hand me down some Bulldogs or use the one's we've already got FFS.

Turn off the red lights ~ Save TFS™'s energy, be efficient and rest the kid.

Low-flow ~ No decent passes from the D, no effective dumping in of the puck, no clogging up the zone, no shit. Flush The System™!

Regift ~ Are we revisiting last year's filthy finish or 2005's? Either way, Steve (Bégin) says it sucks.
Dis pose (says it) all ~ Those are some big cans.
~ ~ ~

Nibbling on plunge cake, watCHing the Habs bake,
All of those tourists covered with Whale oil,
Struggling win-loss string, lg's Jekyll & Hyde thing,
See those fucking sCHrimp, they're beginning to boil.

Wasting away again in Hockey-est-la-ville,
Searching for my lost playoff gestalt,
Some people claim that there's a System to blame,
But I know it's The Notepad's fault?

Don't know the reason that I Pants!'d here all season,
With nothing to show but these game day P(Reviews),
Ain't he a real beauty, our Mexican booty,
How he's still here I haven't a CHlue.

Blew out my FHFlipflop, as I tapped on my laptop
Habs were the heels, now they CHruise on back home,
But there's booze in the Bell Centre blender,
And soon it will render,
That frozen CHoncoction the Habs have going on.

Yes, some people claim that there's a System to blame,
But we know it's all Bob Gainey's fault?

G Y F H G !


HabsFan29 said...

this team really smells bad. like that guy who didn't get up from his chair for two years

but those are nice cans. that's something

Ryan McLean said...

and what the fuck was with Hammer last night? That was the worst showing of defense I think I have ever seen. Ecsp that pathetic dive to stop the second goal. I can cum further than he can dive on the ice. That old fucking twat.

Steve said...

@moeman Great Buffet once again Habs and smile connection.

What the fuck is with Swiss Miss II he can flop around like a dolphin on ice as well as any of them, and his shot from 40 has some heat.

I say take the top 6 attackers (ha ha) and top 4 defenders (ahhh) plus Price and send them to Cuba until the playoffs start.

Chester said...

WTF ! Beaten badly by a large tropical depression. I've had enough of this. Somebody must pay. Isn't this the point when the experienced and highly skilled GM comes down from the cushy office to get behing the bench and steady the ship which is listing badly due to a loosing of the room by the coach ?? Oh no wait we did that and it didn't work then either. Soooo ...... (drums fingers on desk) ..... rightie-o then .. K .. guess we just sorta keep going then ! Ya thats it ! Lets not change anything ... or anybody. Ya thats it ! Tabernak somebody better call a priest.

Anonymous said...

Maybe JM should take them bowling

Steve said...

@Chester, whats better than a priest, a Saint, a Irish Saint, Patrick is an Irish name right?

Chester said...

@ Steve
Ya we had one of them. '93 I was there.
Isn't a saint a dead priest, or is it the other way around ..

Steve said...

@Chester, he can still be with us, blessing the water bottles and sending the system to hell.

Steve said...

In my other job as PM things have gone to shit, Iggy said yes!

I feel like Pretzel meeting John Ferguson.

Just doesn't matter anymore... said...

Hey everybody, we're not doing so badly. Some say it's the fault of who knows!! But for me anyway it all starts at the beginning of hockey and if you can't salvage a point in the end who pays for it? Well, that's just my two cents and if I didn't know better I would switch back to liking Boston, but I like the Habs too much to sacrifice hours of time. It's just no use.

moeman said...

Norm is back.

Steve said...

@ Just dont matter anymore,

I have put in a call to Mr Molsons Viagina. Your being driven to the edge of cheering for the Bruins indicates there is a full blown mental crisis going on. Mr Molsons Vagina has dementia, caused by Choucureahh(vampire gonareah) and Mexican't syphilized, a full flush with St Patrick holy water is the only cure.

moeman said...

Steve, whats the deal with only taking five questions per day?

McPhee said...

The boys won every game that mattered this year (I don't care what you say, last game against the brutes wasn't one of them). Last night's game didn't matter, ergo they didn't win.

All I ask of Agent Alex Auld is to keep TFS on the bench and by that standard he has been spectacular yesterday. That is, if I'm right in assuming he did because I stopped watching at 2-0.

I know this is painful for you skeptics but keep the faith! This team is not the same when games matter. They are infuriatingly useless when they don't (Edmonton, etc.) but I prefer losing to ottawa and beating vancouver than the other way around.

And you thought I had changed...

I'll post an explanatory note at some point.

Orangeman said...

I mentioned it last night and Le Douze brought it up again this morning. I think it's telling that Dags scored a bunch of goals when he first arrived in MTL, then disappeared only to resurge again in St.L. If that doesn't show us Chocula's mishandling of youth then I don't know what does. My lord, it took him how long to put PK and Whiz on the PP together and it resulted in 2 goals right away. The sad thing is I totally expect to not see them together again next game. As much as I complain about CBC hiring a bunch of professional losers I have to admit that the Habs have followed in their footsteps. Let's stack our office with guys from Ottawa because we all know it ended so well over there.

McPhee said...

As promised, here it is.

The Canadiens, a winning tradition (anew) since 2010

Steve said...

@Moeman if you can not express yourself with 5 questions, then your living in Saudi Arabia, and as you know we are an energy superpower, and I do not have to say anything in public, cause we are an energy superpower, just under 6000 years old.

Steve said...

@moeman, I will debate Mr Iggy anywhere anytime at any location, just not before May 2.

Steve said...

And to all you voters out there, being PM with a carpet munching wife, and Queens in every key cabinet, and Batmann, and GGII kids, its fucking exhausting, plus Steve wants to post 100 times a day, fuck give me a break.

moeman said...

@PM "I will debate Mr Iggy anywhere anytime at any location"

In a sauna, commando?

Steve said...

@ Moeman In a sauna commando sound a lot to me a great musician, a lover of John Lennon who needed no religion, what a fuck up I used him so big, that was my biggest thrill since I made a penquin fly and shit on Stephan Dion. So no , I godda da Vinda, sounds much to similar, and I could never grasp that song. And my biggest fear is that since my Frau has been off carpet munching since the kids were born, I would do a live woody, and no one would notice.

Steve said...

@O man in defence of the Canadians handling of young players I have to say the following

Steve said...


If your right, and you put on a Bree Olsen mask I will cum all over your face, from a distance. You would be impessed by the distance, I shoot harder from 20 feet than the Mexican't. My wife always complains about the stalagmite hanging over the bed, Steve you got to call someone in to fix that, and I say, your the only one who can fix that.

moeman said...

@Steve, no need to be fixated on the thickly piled shag rug. Try the better half's backdoor (with permission) or varnish the hardwood and let it slide risky business style with socks on.

b said...

As we make the dolorous passage into the cruelest month, we reflect on the purgatory of mediocrity. We know the system sucks, but the only way for it to go is for JM to go. Could it be that the Mexican might be unleashed in a free flowing fast skating approach? The only way for JM to go soon is an epic fail, last night was a fail, but not epic. The longer term is looking pretty epic. We also got a picture of what mediocre NHL defensemen are all about last night. It was strange to see Hall Gill lose it at the end. When the polite smart kid wigs out, watch out.

Steve said...

Imagine my wife was not a dyke
and most my ministers gay
no budget officer above us
and all those below me pray
Imagine all Canadians
living for the USA
Oh Oh ooo Oh
You say I am leader
well I am the only one
who could fuck up a country
as Great as Canada
and bring the 1800' to everyone

Imagine there is no healthcare
and no pensions too
Imagine we have icebreakers
with aircraft gooning zoom
Imagine us fighting
in each and every war
and Alberta paying no royalties

Yes you may say I am a CRAP dreamer
but I am not the only one
there are 20% of Canadians
who think the dark ages were fun

Steve said...

Wow something that rivals my ejaculate stream.

Number31 said...


Matt - fear the collapse said...

Anyone think this habs team is currently better than the leaf?

Steve said...


Yes, the Laffs have about 3 legitmate NHL players, they have rookies and we have rookies, but TFS is worth Optimus Reimer and his cherry helmet graphis times 4.

Number31 said...

Yes, Matt. Especially when healthy and not randomly falling on the ice with no one around (Hi Hamr!).

Anonymous said...

Who habs fans root for leafs or bruins, if they had to choose

Number31 said...

I dig it.

Number31 said...

Team Meteor.

Number31 said...

I digged that but it's an April Fool's joke and it wasn't even April 1st. Must be a Bruins fan who wrote it. Seriously, someone who writes up a joke using a very serious issue like the head injuries problem in the NHL and the League's bullshit stance on them would be the same type of asshats that called Patches a faker.