Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Habby Hour ~ Partyin' Habs vs. CHilled Canucks ~ Game Preview and Open Call for alCHohol


Hey it could be worse, the mafia could be involved. Rumours suggest that TFS™ and PFK! were out drinkin' at 2am (EST), WTFuck some FHFers are still posting comments at that time. In the inimitable word of Gillis, meh.

Hey Bartender, what's the buzz? ~ 21h30 EST, that's like Happy Hour time in Granville. Game is on RDS. CBC/HNIC couldn't get the gametime changed to something more Easternly so they aren't showing it.

Ladies Night ~ A wink and a drink to our fine FHFemmes. Yeah, yeah, he's sMOov.

2 for 1 ~ We'll trade anyone Mex and Tits for a player, OK, a puck.

First Round is on ~ Molsons.

G.AA ~ Nothing Anonymous about Luongo vs. Price, coupla really good tenders.

CHeers ~ It's a dog eat dog world, and Mex is wearing Milkbone underwear.

Fell off the barstool ~ Lots of Canadiens and Canucks D-men.

Still drunk in Cowtown ~ Panger? Just wonderin'. Call home.

One Bourbon, one scotCH, one Babe ~ For the FHFellas that will hang in there until the end of tonight's game.


BYOBitCHin' ~ Habs are zero for a decade out West. Kick in that fucking saloon door already.

I.DDD. please ~ We're McLovin Desharnais. Sedins get free drinks. Make it a double.

On Tap ~ Orland Kurtenblog

Go for a bite ~ Always something good and filling at J.T.'s Place.

Hamr'd? ~ Roman is falling down way too much, looks tired, needs to sleep it off.

Last Call ~ Turn the lights on and take home a slumpbuster, or this beautiful Bavarian bombshell.


Karaoke this tune by the Jacques HouseMartins

~ ~ ~

It's Habby Hour again
I think I might be Habby if I was out with them
And they're Habby, B.C.s a lovely place to be
Habby that the FHF ire is real and the barman is a she
With their low-five smile
Its the meaning of style
And a night out with Geoff the boss
Where you win or you lose
And its them who CHoose
And if you don't win then you've lost

Heritage Classic's not a good place to be
Don't believe in Calixa Lavallée
'Cause they speak a different language in Calgary
And our song out West never really happens to be
{It's Habby Hour again}
Don't deceive our Calixa Lavallée
'Cause our anthem out West never really stands for thee
{It's Habby Hour again}

oh woah woah Canada

It's another night out with the boss
Following fuckups overgrown with moss
And he tells us that beers grow on trees
And if you sell them right they will land you lots of monies

Unparodied bit;

Where they open all their wallets
And they close all their minds
And they love to buy you all a drink
And then we ask all the questions
And you take all your clothes off
And go back to the kitchen sink

oh woah woah Ovenmitts! Pants!

Heritage Classic's not a good place to be
Don't believe in Calixa Lavallée
'Cause they speak a different language in Calgary
And our song out West never really happens to be
{It's Habby Hour again}
Don't deceive our Calixa Lavallée
'Cause our anthem out West never really stands for thee
{It's Habby Hour again}

woah woah woah woah Oh Canada!

Vancouver, usually not a good place to be
Don't believe it
'Cause they'll play a different game you'll see
And it's really gonna happen 1 win in 3
{It's Habby Hour again}
Don't believe it oh no
'Cause TFS™ & PFK! are juiced since 3 (am) PST
{It's Habby Hour again}
Better believe it
I believe it
Do you believe it

Its Habby Hour again, and again, and again
Its Habby Hour again, and again, and again
Its Habby Hour again, and again, and again

Its Habby Hour encore

G Y F H G!

143 comments:

bea.habs.fan said...

debating on whether to stay up or not.
the way they're playing, it will probably not be worth the lack of sleep the next morning.

Thanks Moe for still finding the creativity and energy to do a preview for this sad sack of a team.

Steve said...

I got way more enjoyment out of that post than I have out of Montreal since Christmas.

Why is drinking Budwiser like having Mex on your team, its nowhere close to being fucking beer, just like he is nowhere fucking close to being an NHL top 6.

squidly77sucks said...

I remeber when MEX got mad 7 or 8 days ago: during the 1st intermission he gave an interview in which he admitted that he HAD TO DO MORE. And by end of interview, he broke his stick as in proof that he'd go out there and kick some ass on ice. I believe it was during that Habs-Boston game almost two weeks ago.
Well since then the MEX production shows 1 pt.

Bill 101 said...

My Canuckistani neighbours are licking their lips at the prospect of (their term) the slaughter. The habosphere is despondent.

Well fuck that. I'm donning the regalia, entering the fray and cheering my bag off (at least until its 0-7)

Worst part is I'll have to listen to them all night complaining (whatever the score) about their depleted defence corps. as if.

small consolation: oysters, crab & tuna tataki with Phillips Blue Buck ale

Wishing Atlantic comrades sweet dreams of third place and third round as well as good news with your morning coffee.

wv: wishing Luongo short-term 'denge' fever

GYFHG!

Hadulf said...

That Peeair meth lab FHFunnies is...uh...disturbing. What's with the little boy and the cock'n'balls shape thing...W.T.F.

wv : Bertrand Raymond would not agree with that image...hostie...

squidly77sucks said...

The National Post Cam Cole: (Habs) "they are... no longer Royalty. They are the Nashville Predators with nicer sweaters."

He may actually have a point.

Hadulf said...

Oh, right.

Late game, sucky team...not sure what I'm going to do but, nonetheless...GYMFHG!!!

Steve said...

Ive got the Choucla Mex sucks Blues

We had a dream
That this was the year
The only team
With PFK
Would take the cup
But then the mex,
He went and sucked
Mex went and sucked

Now the partisans
Have got the blues
With only DDD
Coming forward to
Fill Mex’s shoes
He fills Mexs Shoes
Little guy does not like to lose

Our massive brains
Think we think to much
About offence winning
The cup
Choucula and goat
Say anyway, its so much work
To build the float

Mex he went and sucked
DDD he fills Mex’s shoes
Chocula he has the system
Blues, St Louis losing system
Blues

Kmaxx said...

GYMFHG!! (everything else has been said already...)

moeman said...

Just when you thought you could figure out rankings. You can't.

http://tsn.ca/fantasy_news/rankings/nhl/

HabsFan29 said...

Boy I am really thirsty all of a sudden! fine work moe

OK I'm going to take a five hour nap now. maybe that will work to keep me up til TFS / PFK closing time

Orangeman said...

I find it funny that in TSN's power rankings today they list Boston as one of the 4 elite teams in the league. Tampa, Pittsburgh and Washington all have more points. Hell, Phoenix is tied and SJ is only 1 behind while they're both on serious tears right now. I guess they've jumped off the leaf train onto the Broon one. It's a strange relationship these two teams have.

Steve said...

@orangeman

its the Kaberle effect, after all look how much he did with Toronto.

My kingdom for a Eurologist, and is Souray really that bad?

iRiRi said...

There's absolutely no way in hell they can win tonight. That being said, my prediction is a 3-1 Habs win. No, I'm not drunk. Although that mojito on a beach doesn't sound so bad. You see, whenever the odds are against them, this team tightens up defensively, manages to score more than a goal (maybe even a PPG!) and shocks us with a win. (See the Caps and Pens series, DON'T see the Flyers series). Anyways, this has to be one of those times, right? I mean, Chokula even used profanity during practice yesterday!

If they lose, shots all around on me.

GYFHG!!!

P.S. Time for you weekly HabsTV video! Which song was playing for their first slow dance?

Moey said...

I'll take one of each please (except the beer) with a side of Shelly.

Okay, all is forgiven since that Calgary *shudder* game until tonight.

Trade rumors about AK46 and Cammy. Hmmm.

squidly77sucks said...

I like what Stevie Y & Guy Boucher are doing in Tampa.
Man! Did those two ever turn that franchise around down there!

Congrats to the Bolts. Even MAB is doing well there now. Good for them!!!

squidly77sucks said...

"Trade rumors about AK46 and Cammy."

Sure..... we'd probably send them as depth players in Philly or Detroit for 2nd & 6th round picks in 2012...

ezzeloharr said...

Tonight is not going to be a good night.

Also, my dad is looking to offload a pair of tickets to Thursday's game vs. the laffs: section 115, row R, seats 11 & 12.

Send me an email if you're interested?
mathieu (dot) leduc7 (at) gmail (dot) com

Mr.natural said...

@moeman great stuff!

GYMFHG!

OK so maybe because we play to the level of the opposition and thet the 'Nucks D is as beat up as ours we will pull off the unexpected and get a W.

Hope Habs Hope (HHH?)Hey it could so happen.

Ya gotta believe.

And please people give me a hand with this Saturday night, I gotta get Mrs. N to a piano bar / Jazz club and the short list I have only has:

Upstairs
Le Piano rouge
Modavie

Please please please suggest some others.

Encore merci.

Mr. natural

HabsFan29 said...

@Mr n - the only other one I know of besides those 3 is Maison du Jazz http://www.maisondujazz.ca/

Number31 said...

Do people really worry about calories when they drink?

I have a feeling they bring the cowbell tonight. I mean they can't embarrass Price that many times in front of his family, right? C'mon! GO YOU FUCKING HABS!

HabsFan29 said...

hey that was an awesome first period!!!

wait, what?

someone poke me at 10:05 please

Orangeman said...

I was in the College subway station today here in Toronto and they have a mural of the Habs opposite one of the leaf (this is where the Gardens is). I find that weird. If there was a mural of the leaf in a metro station it would be vandalized. I know this because I would keep a vigil to make sure it was defaced at all times.

I'm up for the game. I'm a goddman Habs fan. Oh, and I'm unemployed at the moment.

Orangeman said...

While I'm here I have a question about the schedule. My understanding is that a team plays their division 6x each (24 games)+4x Coference teams (40 games) plus the other Conference (15 games) plus an extra time for one of the other Conferences' divisions (5 games) = 84 games. But I just looked it over and while the Habs play Western Canada 2x, they only played Colorado and Minny once each. Anyone have any idea why this is and how they made up the games? Or on we on an 82 game sched and I forgot?

Also, Wipeout is the best show ever in the history of the world.

Bill 101 said...

@O-man - I dont get it either. There are some non-linearities e.g. Habs play Van/Cal/Edm twice but Bruins only do once. The fact that they got the Wings twice eased the discomfort somewhat.

I'm all for the match ups with Canadian teams.

but, in the end, it seems like a classic wtf.

Orangeman said...

@101: Right? I remember reading when they revised the sched that each division team would play the same 'other' division team but I also noticed that was not the case this year. So the Bs have played the Wings 2 times but also the Kings. Huh?

Number31 said...

@Orangeman
It's all about the dart board.

So can Eric Staal get suspended for a elbowing Marc Staal in the head? Definitely gets a stern talking to from MamaStaal.

kevincrumbs said...

Let's see if I can make it through two periods tonight. I am, however, looking forward to the fact that I can watch this game on television (in HD!), instead of on my computer with an illegal stream.

kevincrumbs said...

Also, TSN badly needs some better writers:

"The Canucks will try to take advantage of a reeling Montreal Canadiens squad that has lost nine straight road games when they match up tonight in Vancouver."

Uh, I'm pretty sure they mean nine straight in Vancouver. We've lost three straight road games, not nine.

bob cold formerly known as lehab said...

somebody wake up 29! Wait.. we don't want him watching do we?

moeman said...

29 did not asked to be awakened, he asked to be poked.

HabsFan29 said...

huh what? what was that? who's there?

ok ready to go! GYFH

zzzzzz

HabsFan29 said...

whose giveaway was that? ugly

nice headhunting

HabsFan29 said...

oh PK that was fun to watch

HabsFan29 said...

DDD!!!!!

iRiRi said...

DDD!

moeman said...

DDD!

kevincrumbs said...

DD! Holy fuck, a lead in Vancouver!

Orangeman said...

So that's what scoring looks like. I almost forgot.

DDD!

moeman said...

Gio!

iRiRi said...

Gio!!!

*faints*

kevincrumbs said...

2-0! WTF!?

HabsFan29 said...

GIO!!!!!!

/faints

Orangeman said...

Have I been drinking since 5pm or is this really happening? Or both?

Number31 said...

They should go out and drink 'til 2am more often. It's the Patrick Kane method eh?

kevincrumbs said...

Also, the fucking local station that was supposed to show the game has some stupid reality show on instead. Turns out the game will be tape delayed to 11pm. Life in a non-NHL market continues...

HabsFan29 said...

2 minutes for tackling? no?

i owe iRiRi a coke, when we both wake up

Orangeman said...

@kevin: that's hilarious. Here in Toronto the game is blacked out on Sportnet West. In Toronto. Between MTL and VAN. Ok. Anyway, atdhe.me is your friend.

HabsFan29 said...

ok we're all having a little fun and all and it's nice, but it's about time for the System to kick in

kevincrumbs said...

@Orangeman: I had a feeling it was too good to be true that they'd show two Canadian teams in Portland, Oregon. We get a decent amount of Canucks & Sharks games as they're the closest NHL teams.

moeman said...

Poke the system.

Anonymous said...

Just a question of time before the Habs fail.....miserably.

HabsFan29 said...

more tackling with no penalty

we could have 4 goals by this point. i hate that

kevincrumbs said...

@Anon: Yeah, I was just thinking that Canucks fans shouldn't worry. The Habs will shit the bed in the third period.

iRiRi said...

Shots are 14 to 2 and the Habs are leading 2-0. Why, it's almost as if I fell asleep while waiting for the game to start and this is all a dream! Quick, someone pinCH me!

HabsFan29 said...

give me a break

HabsFan29 said...

i can't watch this PK. im scared

moeman said...

Salo doesn't translate well.

Nice PK, lotsa poking.

kevincrumbs said...

Can't believe Fatboy Slim used to be in the Housemartins.

moeman said...

RDS says Lou is a big fan of poking, er poker.

HabsFan29 said...

again, gimme a break

moeman said...

Nice PK, more perfect puck poking.

kevincrumbs said...

I swear Diego Maradona's brother or something is sitting behind Chocula.

HabsFan29 said...

well that was entertaining

poke me at the start of the 2nd

Orangeman said...

With no comment otherwise, it looks like the refs want to control the game.

And sportsnet west announcers are terrible.

HabsFan29 said...

you people are shirking your poking responsibilities. good thing i took all that meth

HANG IN THERE SYSTEM

iRiRi said...

Vancouver is 0-6-4 when trailing after 1. Still, it's best the Habs bank at least another one.

HabsFan29 said...

you can hook if you wear white apparently

HabsFan29 said...

that's a good stats jinx there iRi

HabsFan29 said...

oh Carey, your stick is too curved

HabsFan29 said...

ugh. here it comes

iRiRi said...

FUCK.

kevincrumbs said...

Hey, at least it's not a too many men on the ice penalty.

FUCK. Nevermind...

iRiRi said...

ITS ALL MY FAULT.

iRiRi said...

And so it begins...

Number31 said...

Stupid penalty aside, HEY HAMR MOVE YOUR ARSE! Holy crap what the hell penalty kill unit was that...

kevincrumbs said...

Another penalty? Way to keep your composure, guys.

Orangeman said...

Got up to pee and suddenly they scored?

Another PP? Like I said, refs have control.

Orangeman said...

Just want to clarify, it's not the ones that have been called, it's the ones that haven't, esp when combined with the ones which have.

iRiRi said...

Mitch Melnick just called Chokula a fucker on Twitter. Day= made.

kevincrumbs said...

I completely forgot Squid was playing until that little dust up in front of Carey's goal.

Orangeman said...

Seriously, poke the system. Get a couple early and then fuck off for the rest of the game. It's like being the first of your friends to get laid and then claiming to be a ladies man the rest of your life.

moeman said...

Tits!

iRiRi said...

Big Tits!

kevincrumbs said...

Holy fuck, AK's alive? I love how the Canucks announcer totally jinxed them.

Orangeman said...

Tits? Could it be?

Call it Mission Impossible (stolen from the teevee due to Tom Cruise sighting)

Still, !!!!!

HabsFan29 said...

TITS!!!!!!

OMFG!!!!

TITS!!!!!!

Orangeman said...

btw, I haven't actually seen any of the goals. All three Habs ones I was here commenting (side effect of watching on your computer) and I was in the powder room for the Nuck one. Lesson is to comment here and not pee the rest of the night. So if I seem more talkative than normal (hard, I know (THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID!!)) that's my excuse.

kevincrumbs said...

I'm just pleased we're not down by six goals right now.

kevincrumbs said...

Chicken, what the fuck was that?

Orangeman said...

That was a dumb penalty, but the nuck really sold it.

Orangeman said...

Oh lord, I have to pee. Please end the period.

kevincrumbs said...

Fucking hell, another penalty?

iRiRi said...

Yikes?

Orangeman said...

Refs wrestle for creative control.

iRiRi said...

Crisis semi-averted. Why do they have to make it so hard on themselves?

HabsFan29 said...

only 20 more minutes, System!

L Dude is too tired to log on said...

Well as it approaches 1 a.m. here on the east coast I'm off to bed firm in the knowledge that the zebras will do whatever it takes for a nucks win. The Pax and Chicken penalties were horrible calls. Anyway, perhaps they'll allow the Habbies to take a point home from the west coast as a souvenir.
Good night.

Orangeman said...

Good night LD! I will say it's not so much the penalties that have been called, it's the ones that haven't. Where were the calls in the first 15 mins when the Habs were dominating? I'm very tired of being a paranoid asshole about these things, I never was before the playoffs last year. I don't want to be 'that guy'. But having all officials from the home city of the Heritage Classic? COME ON. Credibility---->GONE.

HabsFan29 said...

amen o'man. i'm with you

HANG IN THERE SYSTEM

HabsFan29 said...

FUCK

iRiRi said...

Don't go to bed just yet!

Orangeman said...

Ok, this time I was out on the balcony enjoying the view. Oh-fer-five.

kevincrumbs said...

"How did he miss?"

He's Gomer, of course he missed.

Orangeman said...

Gomez misses an open net. Should I even bother acting surprised at this point? The fact that he's on the ice, nevermind the PP is an insult to me as a Hab fan.

Orangeman said...

Since going up 2-0, the Habs have been outshot 28-6. Ladies and gentlemen, the SYSTEM.

kevincrumbs said...

Great save by Lou on AK.

HabsFan29 said...

i'm not sure i can take 12 more minutes. at least the game is keeping me awake

Orangeman said...

Tits starting to earn his paycheque. Mex? Urge to kill RISING.

Orangeman said...

And I know that Simpsons quote has been used and abused over and over, but it never gets old.

HACK THE BONE!

moeman said...

PFK! is having a good game.

moeman said...

That was nice!

moeman said...

Squid shoots from too far away.

HabsFan29 said...

Tits is having his best game in 3 months. on the 3rd / 4th line. i guess he belongs there?

Orangeman said...

They just mentioned the "Cammarelli line". I don't even know what that means anymore.

kevincrumbs said...

I swear the Canucks announcers are taking the piss out of Chocula's system.

Good for them.

kevincrumbs said...

Fucking looks like the Canucks are on a PP.

HabsFan29 said...

sure, just trip the black guy with no penalty

moeman said...

Keep poking boys.

kevincrumbs said...

Fucking illegal internet stream looks like it's getting its signal from a pair of rabbit ears. I can barely see the puck.

moeman said...

kc, chew some aluminium foil.

Orangeman said...

No chicken since his penalty.

Gomez on the ice!

Sigh.

Orangeman said...

kevin, we have the same feed! I haven't seen snow on the computer...ever I think.

moeman said...

ReaCH!

HabsFan29 said...

AWESOME play Gill

Orangeman said...

Nice dive by Gill to get that icing. I think. It's very snowy on my screen.

iRiRi said...

Subban has played only 1:32 out of 6 PP minutes BUT he's also played 6:53 out of 9:32 on the PK. Who would've thought?

moeman said...

Poker up front.

Liquor in the rear.

HabsFan29 said...

A WIN IN VANCOUVER!!!!

kevincrumbs said...

It's a miracle! First time in ten fucking years.

(Also, maybe I should sign up for Centre Ice for the stretch run)

iRiRi said...

Fina-fucking-ly a win in Vancouver!

'Night, all.

moeman said...

Bonsoir mes ami(e)s.

Number31 said...

No walls will be punched this time! 2am beer run. Go ahead, boys! Then they'll get tossed from the plane, Russian WJC style.

Oleg Petrov said...

Hooray! Who would've thought 1-2 would taste so good?

kevincrumbs said...

Last time we won in Vancouver, the follow players participated:

Andrei Bashkirov
Breezer
Craig Darby
Karl Dykhuis
Christian Laflamme
Eric Landry (who?)
Juha Lind (really?)
Trevor Linden (bet the Canucks fans loved that)
Andrei Markov (w00t!)
Oleg Petrov
Patrick Poulin
Stephane Robidas
Martin Rucinsky
Brian Savage
PJ Stock
Eric Weinrich
Sergei Zholtok (RIP)
Dainius Zubrus

in goal:

Jose Theodore (pre-balding and general suckiness)

Number31 said...

Holy crap Simon Pegg was there. His first NHL game. He called it "pucking superb".

Orangeman said...

TSN headline: "Lucic Scores Twice As Bruins Hand Flames Rare Home Loss"

Flames home record: 18-10-3.

Like I said, a new weird relationship between these teams/media is born.

In other news, GOOD JOB BOYS. Now let's try to do that every game.

Orangeman said...

@31: Awesome!

kevincrumbs said...

@Orangeman: They're like two women who were scorned by the same man and have decided to be best friends, but the only thing they have in common is that they hate the guy they both dated and are jealous of everything about him.

Also, didn't want to say it during the game in cased I jinxed him but Fat Wale was great.

Orangeman said...

Seriously, Wipeout is the height of our civilization. I've never wanted pot more than now.

Bill 101 said...

OLE

OLE

O (they heard me inKamchatka) LAY!!!!!

nice call RiRi

Mr.natural said...

YA PHUCKEN'YA BABY! GYMFHG!

Ya gotta believe!

A stated we play to the level of the opposition.

My signed framed picture of TFS is looking like the best investment of my lifetime.

@29 thanks for the additional bar.

Ï'm walking on sunshine...and don't it feel good.

Steve said...

Holy Fuck batmann, looks like that Molson deal is working out. Party like its 1993. Go Habs Go, Chocula is brilliant and I just bought a tits bra for my wife.