Monday, December 01, 2008

Carbo's thinking again. Uh oh.

So RDS is reporting that at practice today, Carbo was playing "whose line is it anyway?" again. See if you can play along with these super-sized combos:

Saku with Big Tits and Matt D'Agostini
Pleks with Higgy and Bégin
GBL with Gui! and BGL
Mad Max with Kovy and Little Tits

Didn't we actually win our last game?


lawyergirl77 said...

H I/O is reporting that the Tits may be separated if the Little Tits doesn't shape up according to Chairman Carbo.

Van Hab said...

I have an idea that might make everyone's job a little easier. The lines will be fixed and won't change, EVER, but before each game Pierre Gervais can throw all the jerseys in the center of the dressing room and they'll be tossed to each player at random! We'll be introduced to George Laraque the 5' 8" defenseman, and Carey Price will score a hat-trick on his way to securing both the Art Ross AND the Vezina!

Jaro said...

Facking crappy piece of shit of Mentreal Canadian. Please take me back to Hamelton, Jaro is da wall and facking team cannot score one facking goal, big piece of mankey shit, I hate all of them, make me puke in my glove. One lousy goal for Jaro, facking team score one facking goal in two games for Jaro.

What da fack is this shit, Jaro has to score the goal also. Jaro give you a hint facking couch Carbonner, leave Jaro in da net and put facking ugly Cari on the first line, big fat Cari will got in the crease of other goalie to piss him off. If da facking Canadian cannot score, play Jaro and ugly shit Cari at the same time, ugly Cari stinks in net but his good with da pack.

Da facking KGB couldn’t even get anything out of these facking Russian boys, trade them right facking now for a first round of Russian prostitutes. Now because of them Jaro will sit by himself on a facking stool beside da bench for the entire week while ugly fat bastard Cari get all the spatlight. Jaro better play with Russian prostitutes than the donkey ass Kastitine brothers who stink like cow shit, at least they can score more than once in same day. And how about facking captain Sapu Duku, he so small he can’t even see over da boards, I hate this little bastard, always telling Jaro is time will come, Jaro’s time is now, start shooting da pack in the other teams net you bunch of puke buckets.

Now on top of all this shit, facking clown face manager Gayney brings da big whale Denis to play in net on Sunday, facking looser cannot win da game even when stinking team score 3 goals, they should have put Jaro in net, facking team score 1 goal in 2 games for Jaro and this big piece of whale shit get 3 in the same game. I call my agent this morning, he didn’t answer, Jaro leave a massage to find a team in KHL for him, Russian prostitutes always included in KHL contract.

Facking Russian I still hate them but at least the bring da vodka in dressing room, Jaro will be drunk all week, will show couch Carbonner and manager Gayney how we celebrate centennial in Bratislava, Jaro will be facking naked on his stool drank like a skank teasing da donkey.

Eat shit all you facking stinking Mentreal Canadian, you play like 100 year old granny.

Anonymous said...

Worst. Jaro. Ever.

Lostinleafland said...

Is he serious with these lines?
D'agostini on #1 line?

Bobby should run down from the GM office and punch Carbo in the face. Please, for the love of god keep one line together for more than one period. Fuck.
I believe VanHab might have found out how Carbo is picking line. fuck.

Lostinleafland said...

Seriously, I can't get these lines out of my head.
Does either Kirk Muller or Doug Jarvis have any input with this team? This isn't coaching, its hoping.
Hoping no-one will notice, hoping they get a win, hoping no-one finds out he can't coach, hoping BGL learns to skate before Tuesday.
I think my ulcer is back...fuck.

HabsFan29 said...

@lostinleafland - I prefer to think of it as "D'agostini on the number one line!!! Fuck yeah!!!!"

see what a change of punctuation can do?

/shoots self in face

Lostinleafland said...

HF29 Your optimism is admirable.
But I fear that D'ago will not only be off the #1 line soon, he won't be on the big team in the Spring time but crying himself to sleep in Steel town.

Panic Mode said...

Who is in charge of the power play?

On the 5 on 3 Saturday we had no shots on goal. What's more none of the players actually moved. They all stood like statues, even when the puck was coming towards them.

Maybe Gainey needs to get back behind the bench.

bebop said...

Those are the most fucked up lines I've ever seen. Hopefully, Tangs will be back and they can put together something more like this:

D'Ags-Koivu-Big Tits

No Little Tits cause supposedly Carbo is sitting him or he might even get sent down; he deserves it, though. Anyways, Carbo has to learn to stop putting fucking grinders on scoring lines

lawyergirl77 said...

See, I don't think that it's such a bad idea to put a grinder on a scoring line. Part of our problem is that there is too much traffic in most of our scoring lines, yet our offense and talent is geared towards being able to skate. A grinder on those lines is a good thing as they create room for the talented players to move da puck.

I actually agree with having D'Ags up on the first line with Koivu. He didn't look out of place on Saturday night. If anything, he was constantly in front of the net, creating opportunities for Koivu and Higgy. Unfortunately, it was so strange for them to have someone in red in front of the net, that they rarely passed to him.

So while I'm rolling my eyes at the fact that we seem to be faced with yet another line combo, it's no worse than any of the other fucked up combinations that dear old Coach Combo has tried.

Besides, at least we're fucking playing hockey again, after Gainey came down to read Combo the riot act after the shitty trapping system we've been playing.

Van Hab said...

Perhaps next week we'll see Tanguay and Dandenault behind the bench and Muller and Carbo on the 4th line!

Habsfan10 said...

Muller right now could outskate Latendresse.

Lostinleafland said...

yup, ulcer is back.
doctor says to drink heavily prior to Tuesday's game.
Trap, no trap, free-wheeling, left-wing lock, fire-wagon hockey, fuck the torpedoes,,I can't handle it Carbo.
Pick a system, a line, a tie and stick with it Sybil.
shit fuck shit

Panic Mode said...

Do we need a big trade?

Panic Mode said...

If you need cheering up, Dallas are dead last in the west and Ribeiro has only 3 goals.

Still more than Niinimaa I suppose ...

Gino Tomac said...

They should just take down the "From Flailing Hands...." quote that graces the wall in the dressing room and replace it with "SHOOT THE FUCKING PUCK!!!"

Please please please habs, pretty please with meth on top. Just shoot the fucking puck!

Number31 said...

Bah. Everyone knows the best combo is sticking those brothers together. They don't give a damn who they wing, they can play with any center.

But the only thing that needs fixing is the POWERPLAAAAAAAAY (as well as picking off rebounds). I've been watching Sergei practice his one-timer shots from the top-circle during warmup and he gets it in the net 90% of the time in a tiny little corner! Crowd a goalie, it's gone over his shoulder (unless blocked). It was too weird seeing Koivu in the spot where Kovy is usually. Koivu works better near the net... But whatever, Coach. Maybe Coach Komisaurus can fix it.