I am now in one of my "Habs don't deserve hot chicks until they play better" modes for the previews. Let's hope we get out of it quickly, or soon we'll hit the male strippers. We're just gonna ramble for a bit on about the sucky PP and the fact that Breezer is our hottest offensive player [/slits wrists]. Habs have sucked all the creativity out of me. It's been replaced by pure bitterness.
Game time is 7 PM in Raleigh. Habs have lost 3 of their last 4. Carolina has lost 4 of their last 5. Oooh, clash of the titans! Canes have dominated this series lately, 11-2-3 in their last 16 games against Montreal, including a 2-1 win in Raleigh in the last game where the hero was Sergei Frakking Samsonov. Want to know more about Sergei? Be sure to check out The Life and Times of a Caniac.
Hot Habs? ABSOLUTELY FUCKING NO ONE. We suck. Oh, wait, I seem to have forgotten someone. Not sure why, there may be a mental block. Some player with a 71 on his back has scored goals in each of the last two games. I'm not sure who it is though. Ah well.
Cold Habs? THE LOT OF 'EM. How does thee suck? Let me count the ways. Fuck it, let's just dive into those power play numbers here. 29th in the league. So close to last I can taste it! Habs are 4 for 46 in their last 10 games. It's not just that we're not scoring, we can barely even set up in the zone. Specifically cold are Pleks and lots of Tits, and the Artist Formerly known as The Artist Formerly known as The Enigma.
Injured Habs? The list will very soon be rid of DOOM, but for now it still includes him, TFS(tm), Saku, Higgy, Broken Arm Shift, and BGL. Jaro will go again tonight, his 4th straight start. I think he's been OK throughout, he has deserved better.
Canes have at least been scoring, as they have a hot player or two. Eric Staal has 4 points in his last 2 games, and Tuomo Ruutu the same thing. Canes PP is really not much better than the Habs though, 27th in the league.
No strippers for your post-game entertainment. Until we play better, it's Bible study all around.
Fuck the Habs in the comments. Talk about something more interesting. Maybe how The Subbanator is gonna dominate the World Juniors?