DON'T PANIC: Habs-Flyers Game 2 Preview and Open Thread

OK, let's admit it - Game 1 was a disaster. We sucked balls. We actually got some scoring chances (especially in the first) and Leighton played well, but really, our hearts weren't in it. We were undisciplined. Jaro was meh. Whether it was fatigue catching up to us, rust, a great Phlyers team, us sucking, or some combination, the result was the same: 6-0. Just a terrible score. The immediate reaction: panic.

But I'm here to tell you (in large Habs-friendly letters) DON'T PANIC. It was one fucking game. Whether we had lost 6-0, 6-5, or 1-0, the result was the same. We're down one in the series. Big whoop! It's not like we haven't been down in a series before. It's only Game 2. Still 3-6 games to go. To panic now would be a waste of precious energy you should be using to remove your Pants. There will be plenty of time for panicking tomorrow if we suck balls again tonight.

So turn on your Guide and let's set this baby up.

Waiting in line at Milliways details - 7 PM at the Wachovia Center, on all the usual media outlets. Insert Bob Cole rant here.

The people of Krikkit - the ladies over at Slightly Saucy must be quite happy right now, what with their wacky Flyers-Sharks combo blog.

Hot like Trillian - I guess Squid and Gio are still technically hot despite being pointless in Game 1. For the Flyers, all of them. Michael Leighton is now 3-0-0, 1.11, .959 in the playoffs, and hasn't allowed a goal in 105 minutes. Brière 4 points in his last 2 games. Matt Carle 7 points in 5.

Ugly like a Vogon - CHicken is now pointless in 6 games. The Urologist is pointless in 4, so why is he even playing now? While the Flyers are an ugly bunch of bastards generally, when you win 5 straight really you're doing pretty well.

Paranoid like Marvin - Rhino and Little Tits must be wondering what the fuck they have done to be kept out of the lineup so long. We all know Little Tits won't ever be seen in a Habs uni again (maybe not?), but Rhino really could have been useful in Game 1. He would be useful in Game 2. He's not playing.

Here are some Deep Thoughts - Habs theoretically have one advantage over the Flyers - team speed. WELL FUCKING USE IT. Go on the attack, Jacques. Stop rope-a-doping and SKATE. Tire that Flyers D out. Let PFK pinch. Who give a fuck if it leads to odd-man rushes up the wazoo. A tactic change is needed. Also, if you are going to take penalties Gomez, do something useful with them, like clearing a Flyer from the front of Halak. You know, what Rhino should be doing.

Eccentrica Gallumbits, The Triple-Breasted Whore of Eroticon Six may be found at Atlantis Gentleman's Club.

So long, and thanks for all the fish. GYFHG.