Thursday, May 13, 2010

Heroes: Habs 5, Pens 2

With apologies to moeman and David Bowie and you all for the obvious cliché of the whole thing...

Gio, Gio was king
Two goals, our future captain
And Bettman, and no ref would help us
But we beat Pens, forever and ever
Habs are now Heroes, fucking great day

Cole, and Galley were mean
And I, I drank the whole time
We love PK, and that is a fact
Yes we love him, NTTAWWT

And Gonchar, thanks he did help us
Moen beat him, a shorty forever
Now Habs are Heroes, at least for one day
Come what may

They, they said we can't swim
Like Penguins, like Penguins can swim
Early third, Jaro did save us
We CHased Fleury, forever and ever
We turned back time, just for one day

What Sid say?

And Squid, he is the king
FHFgals, want to be his queen
CBC, and no ref will help us
But we beat them, four games to three
Habs are now Heroes, my Pants thrown away

Ass-, holes can remember (they remember)
Standing, on Ste-Cath (on Ste-Cath)
And the tear gas, shot above their heads (over their heads)
As they looted, as though nothing could fall (nothing could fall)
It's a shame, they spoiled this great ride
We should beat them, for ever and ever
But our Habs are Heroes, is all I can say

East Final Heroes
Habs will be Heroes, come what may
Habs can be Heroes
For one more day
Habs can be Heroes

Fuck Bettman, and refs who don't help us
Baby we're not lying,
Our tin foil hats stay
But Habs can be Heroes, for one more day

What Sid say?

Oh oh oh oh....
Oh oh oh oh....
We'll play one more day
Oh oh oh oh....
Come what may
Oh oh oh oh....
Plan the parade

Oh oh oh our....
Oh oh oh oh....
They'll play one more day
Whoa oh oh oh....
Come what may
Plan the para-a-a-ade


soperman said...

Very funny, but watch out for Boone, he is apparently in the photoshop game now...

But not as good as GG11

swarkles said...

Amazing! All of it!

Anonymous said...

who's the chick?

lehab said...

@ moe.... started the car this morning and the first thing that comes on is "Don't You ♥ Her Madly". There was so much ♥ on here last night I thought this would be a great future parody. And coincidentally the next song was by ♥Heart♥.. GYFH

Mr Trivia said...


everything is awesome.

Wendel Clark's Balls said...

A hot goalie and a lot of luck will only get you this far and no further.

Long term, I'd rather have a consistent solid team that wins the odd cup. What Burke is building in Toronto. But enjoy it while it lasts.

HabsFan29 said...

@Wendel Clark's Balls - HAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. That's some funny shit.

Oh you were serious?

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA. Even funnier. Enjoy your truculence.

Flying Toaster said...

@Wendel - Luck? Luck might give you the odd goal, but winning two series against two of the East's best teams? Luck has nothing to do with it. Luck didn't score 12 goals in 14 games, luck didn't kill off so manyh penalties and luck CERTAINLY didn't shut down Crosby and Ovechkin.

Luck my friend, is a loser's excuse.

The habs won with hard work, skill and ♥.

moeman said...

Sweet song. Sweet pic. Everything today is sweet!

Bill 101 said...

amid the warm fuzzy & hangover, I hadn't even considered how much it must suck to be a Leaf fan today.

gillis said...

I'm starting to think that this is what Gainey had hoped would happen but it took so long to kick in that he thought he had failed, as did many others. It's as if he didn't build this team on size, grit, skill or work ethic... but mostly on character. I mean, I remember watching Cammalleri a couple years back and he always had the right mindset in his interviews of always wanting to win and looking for ways to improve and I feel that he learnt a lot along side Iginla. It's clear now that everybody on this team plays with heart and they are all in it to win and have fun (not you sergei). I think he knew Gill would step up and that Gio would be there to score a big goal, and he knew Cammaleri would love the city and play his heart out. Even drafting players like PK, trading for Gorges the "throw-in", signing Moen, and who the fuck would have guessed that Mad Max and Rhino would step up the way they did. Fuck, even Moore, (and metro sometimes). And how bout Spacek and the look on his face when he scored that goal in Game 6. All those guys seem like they are the ones that every coach wants on their team because they want to win and so far, they are getting what they want

In Bob I Trust and always have trusted and to all of those people who booed him out of his office by mid-season, I suggest you apologize. Especially you FireGainey, you giant fucktard.

inthereds said...

brilliant song brilliant parody... luck is not what this team is about it's everyone pulling, shooting, blocking shots, yapping merrily away at anyone in a Pens shirt, in the same direction

pity the leafs can't figure that out or they would not consistently be on the outside looking in every January

gillis said...

"the odd cup".... is that the reason for the leafs 43 years of failure? Their just waiting for the "odd cup"? Maybe in a six team league Balls. Oh wait, that was the only time the leafs have won an "odd cup". Things have changed since '67 wendy.

"what Burke is building in Toronto" Oh right, I forgot that the leafs are near the middle of their 90 year plan and are doing good job at that by picking up a bunch of goons that can't skate, selling at the trade deadline and finishing second to last in the league, only to give that number two pick to Boston for Andrew Raycroft 2.0. Now THAT, is what I call building a "consistent solid team"

soperman said...

Give the "Ball Boy" a break. :o) Being a Leaf fan he doesn't know much about the playoffs. If must seem like a magical time of year for him.

And he has probably been listening to Bob Cole since he was a young Leafie. It is a lack of knowledge and a feeble attempt at "truculence" that the latest leaf saviour has been promoting. Truculence and scouting Swedish High School teams for more awesome yet medically questionable goalies.


gillis said...

Just went FHF arCHive digging to see what peoples thoughts were the day BG stepped down. It's pretty funny to read now.

Not Geoff Molson said...

@ Wendell's Ball Gag

Go ask for the copy of the Leaf's planned cup parade route again at city hall...but careful - forty-two years of years of document groping has made it very fragile.

A team that plays for the logo on the front and not the name on the back of the sweater goes further than any "luck". To have a 10-time Stanley Cup winner stop by the dressing room (who also scored the game winning goal in the first Igloo NHL game) shows the integrity of the CH and the passing of the torch through the generations.

Meanwhile the team with the "passion that unties us all" can barely even begin to make amends with Dave Keon after nearly forty years.

GoldenGirl11 said...

I'm still speechless

Mr Trivia said...


nice response re: burke's 90 year plan. what a shitshow.

imagine if the laffs had rask this year and their first round pick? and next year's 1st round pick?

we might have had to take them seriously.

but they don't, so we don't.

hahahahaha... fucking laffs.

and also thanks for the link... forgot about firegainey and that bs bandwagon.

Wendel Clark's Balls said...

Let's talk after Jonathon Toews or Joe Thornton is drinking cahmpagne from the Stanley Cup.

Or Dion P. Maybe not next year but within the next 5.

Habsfan10 said...

Now now, everybody go easy on the Leaf fans. I know if Toronto had just done what the Habs have done, I'd be abso-fucking-lutely pissed.

That said, the sad little lengths the PPP boys are going to in order to feel better about themselves is fucking hilarious. I feed off their desperation.

WV: Comiccult. Too fucking easy.

gillis said...

@balls: 5... decades?

Jaybird said...

OMG! That post is the most non-hockey-educated, leafs fan tripe I have ever even seen. WORST POST EVER.

What are you even doing having anything to write about hockey in the time of year where it gets warm outside. If Stanley cups were given to the team that wins series against the Sens in the past 20 years I might not be so hard on you.

Your team hasn't been playing since a win against us four or five months ago. You can always look back on that as your own little Taco Cup...or go play Mario Cart and win some Star Cups or whatever they are since that is the only cup you will see until you sip Ensure out of one....since that will be the time of your life when the Leafs might have a shot.

"A hot goalie and a lot of luck will only get you this far and no further." - WCB

Seriously do you understand hockey? Tell Mike Cammaleri and Hal Gill they are lucky, tell anyone on our squad. GOALIES CAN WIN CUPS, period. See Patrick Roy circa 1993. Who was rocking in your nets then? No one remembers or cares, could be CuJo, Beaupre, Puppa, Kidd, Belfour, Potvin or Casear Goddamn Maniago for all I know. Who was your goalie this year? NO ONE REMEMBERS..., or cares. But ask any Pittsburgh or Caps fan who was in net for Montreal in 2010 and I guarantee that shit will stick with them for life.

"Long term, I'd rather have a consistent solid team that wins the odd cup. What Burke is building in Toronto. But enjoy it while it lasts." -WCB

What does that even mean? The odd cup? Enjoy what while it last? Fucking right we are enjoying it! Typical ignoramus leafs fan once again. Excuse me but what has Burke done? You have a solid defensive core, a pizza faced out of shape American fattie who is out of gas by March and one prospect. ONE prospect. And no first round picks till the next Haley's comet lets not forget about that.

Last time I checked our farm team was in the 3rd round of the Calder cup finals you jackass. We finished 2nd place in the league, first in the Conference. Your Marlies had a losing record finishing 12th out of 14 teams in their conference. Hope this all makes you feel better, get some facts before trolling and not eating whatever the Pension Board feeds you .... Can't believe I wasted this much time on such a grand day.

Oh and your Head coach has Herpes I have seen them on numerous occasions. So does Kessel, weird. Just sayin'

Jaybird said...

What's cahmpagne? The stuff losers to the mighty Canadiens drink?

L Dude said...

Easy on Wendel Clark's Balls Bouncing Off Toller Cranston's Chin.

1) He's probably young. His father wasn't likely born yet the last time the Make Beliefs won the cup.

2) As 29 mentiond, today really hurts for Leaf fans. The anger and hatred towards the Habs (but actually derived from decades of futile manangement of his own team) has clouded any sense he may actually possess.

3) Really? Do you kick puppies too? Helpless. Bewildered. Confused. Puppies. No.

4) It's cute how he's practicing his biligerence and truculence. "Maybe if I talk like this, that arrogant prick Burke will like me."

5) Leaf fans make me laugh.

Jaybird said...

And now, at a special night at the Air Canada Centre. Ladies and gentleman please stand and applaud... We are proud to present the TORONTO MAPLE LEAFS! The 2010 winners of....THE ODD CUP!

*Crowd roars in approval

CanuckleHead said...

@jaybird, wonderful wonderful stuff... you might have to dumb down your next lashing so that queef can understand you. I have to give it to wendel though that is a great username i laughed like hell when i read it. I welcome leaf fans to at least try to get some enjoyment out of our little team that could. At least be a hockey fan and cheer for the team that best represents the fundamentals of hard work and the team concept. Go Habs Go, Ps. Felix Potvin turns tricks for tattoo money

Jaybird said...

@ Canuck

I definitely post too much random thoughts on the board and find myself annoying most of the time but how can I pass an opportunity like that? Just helping do the Lord's work there really...

WV: mishevit ... that's got to be Hebrew! Someone at FHF will have fun with that one..

Anonymous said...

great stuff, i love the leaf fans. what sucks the most for them is that we will be happy with whatever outcome we get in these playoffs. its a nice feeling to genuinely love your team come hell or high water.

WV: dican, Leafs fans should suck my dican lick my nuts

Tyg said...

Jaybird, on a day I thought couldn't get any better, you had me ROTFL. Thanks dude. Well said!

Wendel Clark's Balls said...

Most experts (TSN, CBC) think Burke is going the right route: build slowly.

Enjoy the looting.

Jaybird said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Bill 101 said...

After that icky Pensblog episode, I am enjoying lurking in the Leafs blogosphere today. My favourite so far (fr. Bloge Salming via PPP):

"I accidentally chopped my genitals off with an axe yesterday...and it was the 2nd worst thing that happened to me."

swarkles said...

I find it hilarious that you have nothing better to do all day than to get on another team's blog and post nonsense.

"Most experts (TSN, CBC) think Burke is going the right route: build slowly."

Ha. Keep telling yourself that.

Jaybird said...

Thanks Tyg! It was made possible by WCB. And WCB I'm just playin'....every fan from every team is welcome on this wonderful board from what I have seen...what a great site!

I would consider the TSN and CBC to be Leafs experts as well. After all they employ the best, Gary Galley and PJ Stock. Dave Hodge sure knows his stuff too...I hope he gets that bulldozer out of his anus that has made him the world's nastiest and biggest prick for all this years. And I find Ray Ferraro and Pierre McGuire's rants soothing like silk. For all of the above that is if you're a Leafs fan.

Us Habbies don't really like those two networks...I vividly also remember those "experts" at TSN picking us to finish last in the NHL in 2008. Result: Eastern conference 1st polace. If you ever watch those "experts" pick their fantasy teams on air I get a major kick out of the fact the guy who finishes last in my fantasy pool every year picks a better team is All Habs today with some great articles though! They really have no choice now. Cammi is officially a legend already and some other good ones too!

Mr. natural said...

Clarkie and his balls can fuck off, what asinine hockey "insight", CHrist and his comments on the leafs re-structuring plan now spanning into it's second millenium!! Get fucking real dude.

Luck, hot goalie!? I'm sick of this shit. Sure Halak is one for the ages as is the performance of the vast majority of cup winning goaltenders,BUT consider this: in the past 14 games our mighty midgets outshot the Commie and Crybaby in 3 of the games AND LOST ALL THREE BY A COMBINED SCORE OF 14-5!!

In the 11 games where the team with the biggest heart was outshot our beloved out scored the redline floater and the queer apparent and their respective "teams" by 34-26.

Let's get some Burke's bumboys to analyse that and come up with more deep thoughts.

Somebody hold Wedell down so I can teabag him!

Jaybird said...

@ natural -

Well put. If I read the words "Surprising, Magic, Cinderella or Sleeper" again in the same sentence as Canadiens on any website like someone waved a fucking wand to get us here I'm gonna puke. And then not visit again.

HabsFan4 said...

29, that was perfect. Well done.

I think I'm legally deaf now. No way I'm handing over my driver's licence though.

HabsFan29 said...

thx 4.

I just want to interrupt this (rightly so) bashing of Leafs idiots for an important announcement:


Habsfan10 said...



swarkles said...

I'm going to flip if I hear the words "looting" "vandalism" associated with Habs fans instead of the actual morons using the celebration to cause chaos.

Moey said...

Last night during the first period I thought the Pens looked like we used to. I like the sound of that.

I paced like a caged tiger when it was 4-2. So much stress, glad that there's a couple of days off from hockey. Fourteen games in 28 days, not good for the old ticker.

Oh yeah, and suck it Sid, you'll feel better after a diaper change and a long summer nap.

Baruch said...

For me it's clear, Bob need to step down to allow Halak to take over #1. For all the brilliance of his trades he was blind to Price's flailings. I am grateful it all seems to be working out well. And Gainey is still there, in the shadows. In any case, once again, merci Bob!

btw did anyone see Gauthier muttering "get me ALan Walsh on the phone" after watching Halak make that played legs save on Malkin? Its on the replay...

gottlieb said...

agg sorry folx for the typos
Bob needed....
splayed-leg save...

Wendel Clark's Balls said...

Have you won anything yet?

HabsFan29 said...

give it up Wendel. you're just embarrassing yourself now

Bill 101 said...

we have won, regardless of games to come, the delicious envy/hate of Leaf fans everywhere

Enjoy the "Hopes of a Nation blah blah blah" headlines in the days ahead

Chuck said...

You know what I like about the Leafs?


moeman said...

I've always generalized that leaf fan aren't hockey fans, just leaf fan.

Baroque said...

Even if it is just luck ... so far the luck has lasted far longer than most thought it would, through two playoff series.

Who's to say it won't hold for another month yet? :)

Mr. natural said...

I think it''s unfair of 29 and 10 to compare the stellar performance of a master thespian to the genius of the Burke plan, after all "I served with George Laraque, I knew George Laraque, George Laraque was a friend of mine and Burke Sir is NO George Laraque"! (said in the most indignant LLoyd Benstonesque tone I can muster)

moeman said...


“To live the reality of Montreal is hard to explain to people - and what the atmosphere is like, unless you’re in that building,” said Cammalleri. “It’s pretty cool. I remember (assistant coach) Kirk Muller and I were having a bite to eat a couple of months ago and he said to me, ‘What do you think?’ And I said, ‘When I was a kid and dreamed of playing in the NHL, this is what I dreamed it would be like.’

kevincrumbs said...

Fuck all the haters, although I prefer the Leaf fans who still hate us instead of the idiots who have jumped on the Habs bandwagon. FUCK OFF, WE DON'T NEED YOU.

Fuck the Leafs (even though they have actually spawned some great blogs).

RiRi said...

That Squid quote got me all misty-eyed.

In the words of Cammy, hopefully the best is yet to come!

Go Habs Go!!!

P.S. Enough with this luck B.S. Not you guys but everyone else on the interwebs.

Mr. natural said...

Agree W/RiRi, enough is enough now, keep your eye on the prize, fuck everything and everyone not with the program, those who are not with us are against us.


Pants all the way!

I thought I was going to cruise all weekend but the games Sunday, I was sure it was Monday.

Yummay an extra day of heavy drinking, it's the only way to keep the nerves from making my heart explode. Scotch is good, but others work too.

Fucken' Queef fans.......

orangeman said...

Just checking in here to make sure it wasn't all a dream. Also, I love Bowie.

I'm not going to get into it with any Leaf fans, many of the ones I know have been supportive and even congradulated me (like I did anything myself) yesterday. I have to say tehy're better people than I would have been if the roles were reversed. Though I suppose we never really have to worry about that.

I will say, if you're still depending on the 'expert' opinions of TSN and CBC after they said Caps in 3 and Pens in 3 1/2, then maybe you should seek better fortune tellers. By the way, the Canadian media wants Leaf fans to believe there's a game plan to keep them watching instead of fucking off and forcing MLSE to actually spend money and create a good team.

Anyway, if you think it's luck that got the Habs where they are now then that would explain why your team cannot win. Just look at Crosby, he was still saying it was luck and the Habs didn't deserve to win. If that's your attitude after you lose then you'll just keep on losing. I think Bos/Phi will be a much tougher opponent because they will not have this attitude as they've also gotten this far through hard work and a system. And if you think teams with hot goaltending and a defensive system never make it far you should probably tell the 2003 Anaheim Ducks, 2004 Flames, 2006 Oilers, the Sabers of the 90s and the Devils for the last 15 years. Defense wins Cups.

Anyway, I'm not going to defend the Habs anymore. They've more than proven themselves by now and real hockey fans, no matter what their affiliation, recognize that.

gillis said...

Gomez shows off his special sauce

GoldenGirl11 said...

@Baruch Gottlieb
I see you as blond and blue eyed. Just guessin'

b said...

14 games the Leafs did not get to play.
Maybe 14 games to go before the parade.

In our darkest day, we are not haunted by the ghost of Harold Ballard. The odd cup? I heard a song about that. Plane crash?

We are not scared of the Fantomes, only concerned that they couldn't find their way across town for a few years. Now that they're home, they are even finding their way to the airport and the flight. Time for Joe Malone to find his way home from Seattle. But alas Leaf fans, that was before your time.

Number31 said...

Leafs? Marlies? Both beat the Habs and the Bulldogs in OT on the last game (while meaningless to the Bulldogs) yet didn't make the playoffs.

Andrew Conboy has this to say to you.

OK while still happy it's back to business. Dickie Moore said "congratulations you haven't won anything yet" so GYFH!!!

Anonymous said...

HF 29/10/33/4 who would you rather face in the ECF? What I mean is what do you think is the easier matchup? Philly greatly outsizes our little dwarves but they are also in a lot of injury trouble. What do you think?

orangeman said...

History has been made, bitCHes.

GoldenGirl11 said...

What if the advertising department had any creativity. History would be made.

Daddy Says said...

Morning ya'll, still drunk on love for our little people.
a couple of things,
GG, love the pick.
29, gold pure gold.
WCB, guy common. really. whatever
I find it difficult to agure with laff fans in the off season they have so much time on their hands to pick apart other teams while we have to focus on what, oh yeah, the playoffs. WCB REMEMBER what that was like? didn't think so.

As to who(m) to play in the next round. The B's? Hate the Boon's almost as much as the Loser Leafs. But they have a few of our cast offs and that makes for good fan fodder.

Philly on the other hand, GOONS and that's fine cause who are they going to fight? My worry for Philly is their net presence and riding their own comeback high.
However Philly is injury ridden. And the goalie has 1.5 games under his belt, with the possiblity for one more.

Either way lets hope for triple over time, and the bloodiest game ever played in the playoffs.


Leafs suck. Pants