How are the Habs juggling all the blueline injuries and still coming up with a Big D? Magic!
Do or die. There is no tomorrow. Backs against the wall. Am I forgetting one? It's the fourth such match for the Habs this year, so they've heard 'em all. Several times. Just in the playoffs.
We've been posting little crazy little blog nazi's for the past few weeks, and since you obviously have internet access and some sort of an affiliation with the Habs (whether pro or con), there's not much I can tell you in terms of a game preview that you don't already know.
Apparently I am forbidden from praising any head coach of the Montreal Canadiens on this blog, given all the blame foisted uponCount Chocula Jacques Martin and Carboner before him. So how about a little praise for an assistant coach?
Perry Pearn runs the defence for Montreal, and has done a great job line matching in the playoffs. Impressive in and of itself, given the reputation of the opposing forwards faced through two rounds. With injuries to Paul Mara (yes, apparently he is still on the roster), Markov, Spacek and now Gill, combined with a rookie defencemen playing over 20 minutes a night and MAB's inability to turn and skate backwards once he has gained any forward momentum, we only have one conclusion:
Perry Pearn is a wizard.
Jaro provides a helping hand, of course, and between the two of them they've been making defensive magic behind what all the cool blogs are calling (graciously) a "patchwork" defence. So, consider this our tribute to the Magical Mr. Pearn and his apprentice, Jaro.
Now if only Kirk Muller can trap some of that magic in a bottle for his group of midget attackers and we might see a game seven on Wednesday...
We've been posting little crazy little blog nazi's for the past few weeks, and since you obviously have internet access and some sort of an affiliation with the Habs (whether pro or con), there's not much I can tell you in terms of a game preview that you don't already know.
Apparently I am forbidden from praising any head coach of the Montreal Canadiens on this blog, given all the blame foisted upon
Perry Pearn runs the defence for Montreal, and has done a great job line matching in the playoffs. Impressive in and of itself, given the reputation of the opposing forwards faced through two rounds. With injuries to Paul Mara (yes, apparently he is still on the roster), Markov, Spacek and now Gill, combined with a rookie defencemen playing over 20 minutes a night and MAB's inability to turn and skate backwards once he has gained any forward momentum, we only have one conclusion:
Perry Pearn is a wizard.
Jaro provides a helping hand, of course, and between the two of them they've been making defensive magic behind what all the cool blogs are calling (graciously) a "patchwork" defence. So, consider this our tribute to the Magical Mr. Pearn and his apprentice, Jaro.
Now if only Kirk Muller can trap some of that magic in a bottle for his group of midget attackers and we might see a game seven on Wednesday...
[Ed. Note: for those who repeatedly hit "refresh" like HF29, you'll notice I originally posted without a title, just to be different. Well, some people - like HF29 - like to click the title to get all the comments on screen with no pop up, so I've added an admittedly lame title for you and your ilk. So much for thinking outside the box. Heh, I said box.]
Who else has been magical for the Habs? Okay, let's talk more about PK in the comments.
286 comments:
1 – 200 of 286 Newer› Newest»I. Can. Barely. Breathe.
The PK has hardly been magical. 9 GA during the flightless birdies' PP. We miss Markov! He should suck it up and answer the call to arms!
PFK on the other hand - fucking awesome!
Paul? Mara? who?
quality work GG
GYFH
GYFP
GYFM (go you ficking meth)
oh and Panger I praised JM several times over the last week and a half. it's acceptable now, as long as it comes with a snide remark about his lack of emotion
Magic.
Magic is good.
Calf magic for Gill. Ear magic for other Jaro. Knee magic for Markov. ?? magic for Mara. Black magic to the fucking Pens and their odious followers..
Bring on the magic.
GO HABS GO!!!!!!
Oh boy Game 6- that's when I'm a Viking!
Ah decisions, Heart or Boomtown Rats?
WV = dithers
We're gonna fucking tear the house down with shots and goals tonight.
Halak's gonna batten down the hatches. Real tight.
Subban's gonna come out tonight and play HIS style, only he'll turn it up a notch or two.
Gionta is going to our hero.
Mark my words, I possess a sixth sense.
Enough said?
Magic: The Gathering of all the Penguin skaters into a small contained area below their faceoff dots. Fuck that Sidney Potter and the rest of his goody-two shoes Griffindor buddies. Except that Hermione. Saucy little minx.
WV: Hope the Habs excende the series one more game. I'm well aware I'm reaching, thanks.
Magical Game 6 Preview and Open Thread (of Magic?)
Yes. That's it.
GYF(magical)H!
I like magic, magic is good, except for black magic. Fuck black magic, unless you aim it at Pensburgh, now that's good black magic, right?
WV : I wave my magic wand at Pensburgh and phing... they are all affected by Jaro 2.0's virus...
I'm crazy.
HOLY FUCK WE'RE ALL GONNA BE FUCKING WIZARDS TONIGHT!!!
still 2 hours. what to do til then?
HF10,
"saucy little minx" Love it, so Hugh Grant.
moeman,
Boomtown Rats S.V.P.
GYFHG!!!!!!!
Is there anyone else that doesn't like Harry Potter movies or is it just me?
@29 - Just noticed you have a pantsless Oven Mitt for your Avatar - LMAO - very nice!
Now then...everyone take a huge deep breath, inhale together and then let out a huge...GO YOU FUCKIN' HABS PANTS GO! One more time please... GO YOU FUCKIN MUTHER PANTS HABS GO! and then once more just to be on the safe side... GO YOU FUCKIN MUTHER PANTS HABS GO!...exhale...we're all gonna be alright!
Magic Men
♫ 1976 ♫ Did you know, these ♥ babes are from Canada!
Cold late nights so long ago
When the Habs were not so strong you know
A witty man came to WE
Never seen heart so true
HMCS Gill will not sail away
Some deemed him not ready to play
It seemed like he knew the Kid
He looked right through cryin' Sid
Come on home, Gill WE say with a smile
You don't even have to use FHF meth
Let's get high awhile
But try to understand
Try to understand
Try try try to understand
You're magic man.
Winter nights we blogged in tune
Played inside this blog sans-Boone
Never think of never
Let this Jaro spell last forever
Last Summer passed to fall
Bob tried to realize it all
Media says he was worried
Wanted a Cup in a hurry
Come on home, Squid Bob cried on the phone
Too soon to lose my Pants!, Gio and Mex are already home!
But try to understand, try to understand
Try try try to understand
You are a magic men, Oh Mama!
You are a magic men.
Win at home!, guys WE say with a smile
WE cast our spell of love on you, make us go wild!
But try to understand, try to understand
You are magic men!
Go
You
Fucking
Magic
Habs!
My wife is making me clean up the supper dishes if I want to see the game in HD. Small fucking price. (no offense Carey).
GYFH
Go Pants.
Whatever it takes.
@Moey
Not a Harry Potter fan.
Still. Can't. Breathe.
BTW, sweet thread 33 and hypmoetizin' pic GG.
Moey, try to understand, try, try, try to understand, I'm a parody man. I'll do you a Rats rendition in a while, with a smile.
But first, leftover lobster (Metro $pecial this week is incredible!) must be smoovly mixed into some risotto avec asperges. Accompagné d'un magique Pinot Grigiot.
@moeman: heart is from seattle.
@soperman: tell your wife to do the dishes herself and to get you beers all night too...
ps: i'm a woman.
Update from the Bell Centre - the mood is SUPER subdued. Don't get me wrong, everyone is in Habs stuff, but it's very VERY quiet. Peeps look hella nervous.
No idea what that's like *whistling*
Moe - parody is genius. GENIUS. A sprinkling of pixie dust or some other such magical thing your way....
... *shakes some over Bell Centre too*
Thnx lg. Have fun. Make noise.
@Anon, I believe at least one of the Heart gals is from Canada. Click on the youtube vid link and you'll hear as much.
WV = (and this one is for our friendly FHF hosts) bilit
Also, Monsieur Mike Boone,
Please take no slight in me using your family name to make a rhyme.
Also, I liked this.
Hawkesbury, motel, women's clothes ... man I could write a song with Jean Leloup about that.
WV = sublet, as in I hope the Molsons don't need to sublet the Bell Centre after tonight. Wait until July.
Word is Sid has already dropped by the refs' room and complained. Fucking suck.
moe - here's the thing: that wouldn't even fucking surprise me.
Asshat.
heh@lg's 'asshat', which BTW is what gary bettman is and word is he accompagnied Sid whilst visiting the ref crew.
~~~
Moey, I have penned 'I won't like Mondays' but will only post it if the Pens find a way to steal/cheat/whine away a win. May it rest in peace cuz I don't wanna shoot the whole, world, down.
I have to say this but it's killin' me, Jack Turd wrote a decent column about our boys today.
Now I'm off to take a shower.
WV - grocked. As in I hope Sid gets grocked by someone. I have no idea what that means but it sounds kinda dirty and perverted.
moe,
I thought you may have changed it to "tell me why I don't like Sidney, I wanna shoot the the whole team down."
There's ovenmitts.
There's beer.
There's wine.
There's meth.
There's ice cream.
Then there's;
"Now I'm off to take a shower."
WV = gigidec as in gigidy
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Gigidy&defid=1582924
@Moey - he only wrote that because he saw that the zeitgeist was to be happy and positive about the Habs instead of negative. he didn't mean a fucking word of it, I guarantee.
Grocked. heh. I like it!
Close Moey but I want the Habs to shoot and shoot the Pens down.
@GG: I laughed out loud at the Perry Pearn wizard and Jaro as Mickey Mouse from Fantasia (although I personally prefer Scratchtasia). Great job as always and hopefully your next Photoshop work'll be for Game 7 and not some off season stuff.
Go Habs Go.
OMG. Jaro as Mickey Mouse? Too cute!
I read on Twitter that Big Sexy is a scratch tonight. WTF? Let;s hope it's all part of the wizard's plan.
GYFH!!!
@Kevin
Thanks. Game 7 yes! This headache better not have been for nothing.
@Moe
if I wasn't ready to throw up I'd be blasting that! They have heart so it's perfect.
@RiRi, "Big Sexy is a scratch tonight" ?
HF29 isn't showing up? He has an itCH that can't be scratCHed with ovenmitts?
@GG, as they say, the way to the heart is through the blouse. Or something like that.
Speaking of hearts, mine is half-way up my throat.
KD and hotdogs tonight. Comfort food, also my pink cat blankie cos I'm kinda nervous and I can't hang out with you good folks until after the game.
*sigh*
@moe - I'll let 29 answer this one!
Moey, come back!!!
moe, im here. just trying to get all the eating and masturbating out of the way before the game starts. it's your fault for point me to mid-70's ann and nancy wilson. giggidy. well done
one Wilson sister were born in Seattle one in Vancuver, and Vanc was both their home for a while.
*heart palpitations*
RiRi puttin' 29 on the stand. Nice!
*pointing me
like my oven mitt is pointing the way to victory
moe,
Right after the game ends. We can either celebrat or comiserate together.
@RiRi, "*heart palpitations*"
Nicely done.
celebrat? I give up.
"all the eating and masturbating out of the way"
Let's hope those were done separately. Cause then you really will be itCHing.
Pierre: my god Benny! You're wearing your striped suit!
Benny: ayyayayayai
fuck its game time....
@Moey, so long as there is spooning.
Breathe deep, hug your cats, keep Mr. Moey awake and be good (and bad). ♥ ya.
Aww, how cute. Versus' intro talked about how the Pittsburgh crowd was great in Game 5. You mean the lady knitting behind the Pens bench and all the fuckers in white sitting on their hands the whole time?
Also, note how no Habs have whined about Kunitz accidentally stepping on Gill, unlike Cooke and the Pens whining about PFK accidentally catching Jordan Staal.
FUCK THE PENS.
Gill is not in. Find some extra ♥ bitCHes.
Came in early to work to watch the 1st period. Last time I did that was Game 7 vs Caps. Game plan is simple, just score more goals than them. Do it.
Gill is out.
/takes shot of wodka
Gill out, Jaro 2.0 in. and Little Tits out. big surprise on that last one
"eating and masturbating"
May have to register that for my new rude and nude food + hockey blog.
No matter how this goes, I want an honest effort (that's a given with this team) and the crowd on their feet cheering them on. No booing.
Go Habs Go!!!
@HF29: I think everyone who posts here has a greater chance of suiting up than SK does at this point. JM obviously likes his gals busty.
Shouldn't have eaten those butterflies for breaky. Oie, my tummy.
Sid just complained about the anthems not being to his standard.
Habs have real game faces on during the anthem. i like it
Habs have played 3 elimination games thus far, have dealt with serious injuries and questionable (at best) officiating. What have the Pens gone through? A slight injury to their 3rd line centre?
I BELIEVE!!!
GYFH!!!!!!
Moe: HA!
Halak: .978 S% in elimination games this post-season. I think I just got a stiffy.
SQUID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
SQUID!!!!!!!!
SQUID!!!
What a beauty!
SQUID!!!!!!!!!!
SQUID!!!! Cashing in again!
I hope I hear U2 700 times tonight.
Did anyone type SQUID!!!!!!!!!!!
Great minds...
KC: That's probably the only time I've ever heard/read that about U2.
All Caps too!
Wow! They hadn't even put out the fire from the torch yet!
@Sonia, nor will they, ever.
TORCH!!!!!!!
FUCK.
oh fuck not another too many men
Fuck, how do you let this happen?
Cole's senility is rubbing off on Galley
Letang looks shaky and terrible tonight.
Galley is an ex-Bruin, he's 100% nuts.
good early kill
FUCK
Oh, piss off Crosby.
UGH. IT HAD TO BE THAT WHINY LITTLE BITCH.
im sure it will be a habs penalty Bob
A PP coming up? Or am I being delusional?
Fluery looks shaky, just put it on net boys!
No Gill and Crysby is left alone.
WV = pablumn, as in who will feed Sid his pablumn
How the fuck did Orpik not get a penalty?
Oh, I was being silly. Of course it's a Pens PP. It's Game 4 all over again. Even Cole can't believe it.
more reffing jokes
WTF, how is this a Habs penalty?
well they got that one
Fuck Orpik. Hope that fucker breaks his leg.
How the fuck did the Habs get the penalty on the previous play? cooke runs a Habs and Montreal gets it?
God forbid Moore take the offensive zone faceoff.
Could CHicken be any more useless?
Subban throwing punches at Guerin. White must have told him.
RiRi knows. CHicken is no small fowl and has no idea how to use his wingspan.
He is so predictable. We'll probably trade him to, say, Nashville. He'll score 10 goals in his first 10 games then disappear into obscurity. Rinse and repeat.
Way too much time in our own zone.
Subban covering Crybaby. Me likey.
Jesus Christ, Mex.
Oh Gomer...
How is it we have last change and yet, Crybaby and Malkin were out there against Metro?
deep breath
they spent way more time in our zone, and it's 1-1
deep breath
I'll take it but I'm not happy with the time spent in our own zone.
WTF is Crysby doing having a conference with the refs.? Dude, man up for fucks sake.
Too much time in our own zone? Where have you been all playoffs? I feel most comfortable when they're getting outshot 20-5.
Time to get to work. Whatever happens I love everyone and everything.
Squid, playoff leading goal scorer.
Extra ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ for a missing HMCS Hal Gill.
Gomez suffers from Hisics (Higgins Physics - the ability to turn a sure goal into a miss)
Someone's gotta tell me how to do those little hearts
@Number31 - Thank you!! I've racking my brain, trying to think of who Gomez reminds me of!
@RiRi, copy (save into a simple text doc) & paste T your ♥'s content.
Go you fucking Habs that I ♥!!!
i ♥ meth
and, uh, Habs too. i ♥ Habs
Bull fucking shit. Somewhere out there McSplooge & Ray Ferraro are enjoying this penalty.
Thx moe ♥
i find that call questionable
Pens hitting the post = karma.
I also ♥ hearing ping on a Pens PP.
This one better not be another Habs penalty.
THIS IS FUCKING BULLSHIT.
Did I mention Crysby conferencing with the refs to end the 1st?
Of fucking course.
epic kill again. hold on
oh great ANOTHER penalty???
FUCK OFF, YOU CHEATING ASSHOLES.
(At least I didn't have to spend February cheering for Crosby)
FUCK THE NHL, THE REFS, EVERYONE
Definition of a fuckface = letang.
What a fucking joke. I could throttle someone.
-Habsss
fans are angry. there's gonna be rioting if we lose. at least THAT's a reason to riot
If we're going to get called for non existent penalties, might as well just whack Crosby on the head with a stick. Where's Perezoghin when you need him?
I'm wearing my tin foil hat what about you guys?
Go you fucking Habs!
tin foil hats for everyone!
Max, Moore and Pyatt = Mighty.
If cbc/hnic has any balls they ask Crysby WTF he is talking to the refs at the end of every fucking period.
S Q U I D !!!!!!!!!
SQUID!!!!!!! U2!!!!! AK DOES SOMETHING!!!!
Squid telling bettman and his buttboys to go fuck themselves.
Um. I'm going to the Bell Center and proposing my undying love to Mike Cammalleri. Later!
TORCH!
WV: Somehow, the game just got less shidy
I want to have Cammalleri's little squid-y babies.
i had a ♥ attack there. i couldnt comment
i ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ squid
Hey Pittsburgh, this is what a real crowd sounds like.
Need more ammo? nhl.com headline is Sid "Must see: Crosby busts out of scoring slump". Yes I took a screengrab. Fuckers.
Cooke blatantly elbowing someone in front of the Pens bench, no call, of course.
i had enough ammoe already, but thx. fuck everyone
SPACEK!!!!!!!!!!
FUCK YEAH!!!!!!!!
Jaro 2.0!
Very happy for the poor guy.
Okay, can Versus start ragging on Jaro and maybe talk about Fleury's brilliant game tonight?
Yeah Other Jaro!!!
how did Mad Max not get a penalty for all that hard work down low?
Oh man, gotta love Max's chippiness and motormouth.
Squid reminds me of Howie Morenz!
COOKIE MONSTER! ♥♥♥♥♥♥
Take THAT vertigo.
Good crowd tonight. Standing room only, even if they have seats.
Hand pass? Really? I honestly have no idea as VS doesn't bother to show a replay or anything.
I know I'm late but...
SQUID!!!
SPATCH!!!
well what do you know Pens dont get away with one
Finally, a penalty on Matt Cooke.
About fucking time you bettman sucking, Crosby-cornholing fuckers.
Matt Cooke, shut the fuck up or we'll give Evander Kane your address.
that was some kind of period
GorGeous Habs hockey!!!
Please retire bob cold. PLEASE!
Great play since about the 2nd half of the 2nd period. Max, Moore and Pyatt woke this crowd up.
Hisics strike again!
Spacek was actually aiming for the corner but the vertigo threw him off!!! Yay vertigo!!!!
Gotta love Muller practically giving PFK a big thumbs up on his way to the room. Keep it up, PFK!!!
And Keep it up, you fucking habs!!!
I ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ my Habs.
pj sucks 'I'm looking for mistake". Here's an idea you fucktard, look in the mirror.
Anyone have a screengrab of Lapierre going WhaaaAAAT? after a scoring chance near the end of the 2nd? I hope I don't sound crazy but it was the funniest thing ever.
Healy...I don't think the crowd is intimidating the Habs...
"pj sucks 'I'm looking for mistake". Here's an idea you fucktard; your parent not using contraceptive"
I liked the Max moving .gif someone posted yesterday. He sort of did the same thing late in the 2nd.
Lots of hockey left in this game but ... kidz ... never, ever give the cbc/hnic any credit. These are Habs-haters first and foremost. They slag, slag, slag and then oops, have to tail back. These CotU people are not hockey fans, they are bettman lackeys and anti_habs, until our team starts to win. They do not deserve to broadcast our team. They don't during the regular season and when they do their ugliest face and voice rises to bile level.
Go You Fucking, Fucking, Fucking, Fucking, Fucking, Habs!
Wow. What a period of hockey. It was a battlefield, and the boys really turned the tables on the Pens at the 10 minute mark.
I'm so proud of these guys. That was incredible.
My kids were standing behind healy while he was interviewing. I missed it. Were they fighting? Never mind. I don't want to know.
shitting my pants in NYC...
GYFH
One class cancelled, get to watch a bit here. I'm shitting my pants. Just stay out of the box and it'll be good.
For the love of God, I'm not even ask for Pens penalties. Just fucking let them play.
Stay out of the box. What was I thinking. These are the the Pittsburgh Bettmans. Ri-fucking-diculous.
fuck another PK. HOLD ON BOYS CMON
WHAT THE FUCK! TIN FOIL HAT MY ASS! Crosby hooks Andrei on the scoring chance and they call Moore for the light love tap a crosscheck?!
WTF? "These Canadiens will not go away!" ~ bob cold
"these canadiens won't go away"
you sounded disappointed you senile bob cole
another epic kill
i predict a max of two minutes before the Pens are back on the PP
I LOVE THIS TEAM! What fucking heart! GYFH!
wv: serveses
"I'm gonna need a few serveses after this one."
YOU GOT THAT RIGHT REFS. FUCK YOU COOKE
Once again, STFU Matt Cooke. That was obviously interference.
Also VS needs to lay off Jaro and the second goal he let in. Yes, he should've had it but it wasn't like it was a 30 foot shot that squiggled in.
fuck heh
That better be a fucking penalty. Why is it when we're down it's like the numbers falling off a roof with that clock, but when we're up it's molassas.
Also, I can't think of good metaphors or spell correctly at this point.
Oh go fuck yourself CBC.
gary galley doesnt like the call. big surprise
retards on cbc don't like the call. surprise?
galley ain't happy. Too fucking bad you Habs hater.
ice cream in,
"Canadians need one against this Pittsburgh team"
WE'RE FUCKING WINNING BOB
A Subbanian Spinorama!
Nice.
choco tacos for all
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