Monday, October 04, 2010

So You Think You Can GM? Britney Spears Grinds with the Grinding Forwards

So, you think you can GM? Ya, you and all the guys on Antichambre, the louts in the cheap seats, Jack Todd, H/IO's mouthbreathers, and every Jean, Richard and Henri on the street. You know what? YOU'RE ALL CRAZY. Just like our celebrity guest GM's. 

Hi y'all! Thank y'all so much for inviting me to play GM for a day. And let me tell y'all, I know a lot about hockey, coming from Louisiana. Y'all know it's a hockey hotbed because Gary Bettman wants to put a franchise there. Uh oh, I think I hear little Jayden crying, so I gotta go... to Starbucks. And then Burger King. And then maybe Starbucks again. While I'm gone, enjoy this little ditty.

Oh Métro, baby
Oh Métro, baby

Oh Métro, baby
How was I supposed to know
That Gauthier didn't like you
Oh Métro baby
Habs shouldn't have let you go
And now you're out of sight; Suisse!

Tommy, McSplooge wants you to be
Show me Tommy
'Cause Habs need to know now what they've got

DarCHe's contract is killing me (and I)
I state a fact, I do believe (do believe!)
If JM plays him I'll lose my mind
Well, one more time
He'll be playing the fourth line

Oh Dominictrix
The reason I breathed was you
A Tampa deal you signed it
In last year's playoffs
Was nothing that you couldn't do
And Stevie Y did find it

Benny, Maxwell great can you be?
Show me Benny
'Cause Habs need to know now what they've got

[Repeat CHORUS]

Oh MOEmaN, baby
Oh MOEmaN, baby
Oh MOEmaN, baby
I wanted to let you know
Oh MOEmaN baby
Habs never can let you go

I must confess, that Boyd from the Preds
Will play for us now
Don't you know I do believe
That he will be here
And for a long time
He'll be playing the fourth line

[Repeat CHORUS]

I must confess, that our Max PatCHes
May kill us now
But you know I do believe
Ryan White will be here
And for a long time
He'll be playing the fourth line


Anonymous said...

Steve said : Capitan White scored 4, but story was in French, I came here for the facts but nothing, like did his skates stay tied the whole game? How did it fell to to get 4, would it better if they were all assists or goals, will you be playing for the Habs before or after Christmas. Are you afraid of Kadri?

RiRi said...

Great lyrics!

Is it bad that I can totally picture Britney singing the national anthem at a Louisiana hockey team's game in 10 years? Oh, I'm sorry. Lipsynching.

Habsfan10 said...

Timing is everything ... apparently Britney's conservatorship is going to end soon so she'll be back in control of her finances and decisions. Cue the crazy!

Anonymous said...

steve said:

Squid says I am done with Nino
he does not have a hockey name
and he treats me to a head shot

Squid does not try and hide the replay, he says it will tell you everything

I was only doing the force channel
I was only doing the force channel
Or i would have used the lightsaber on his sack

So mister Campbell remember the rocket, look what we do when were not even pissed off,
So if you dont want Montreal to look like Philly all cleaned up,
Judge with moral relativism and give Nino a new name and suspension.

moeman said...

Bien fait 29.

moeman said...

Squid gets one game.

soperman said...

@ GG11

Did you put BriSpe's face on Gomer's head and then put the whole unholy mess back on her body?

Hit him again, Squid! Don't let those fuckers mess with you!

LJ said...

One game is fair, get to see Eller in the top-6 I would guess.

Too bad BGL wasn't around.. could hit Nino with a veggie burger..


orangeman said...

Nice 'song'. I just watched the recent Britanny Glee. I'm overdosing (note: remembering she exists is overdosing). That shaved head is still frightening.

Ooooooooo, 3 more sleeps!

gillis said...


moeman said...

@gillis, heh, you never disappoint

Ian Vitro said...

Man, following the Halak trade I'll never bother finishing my Habs version of "Aeroplane" by the Red Hot Chili Peppers... the chorus was "It's my Jaro playing."

'Cuz who'd sing a song about Spacek?

mr trivia said...

best. tag. ever.

Moey said...

Battle of the Blades was good last night. Didn't realize Laraque had such a big caboose. I think the Russian couple were the best.

RiRi said...

Orangeman, a gleek? Who would've thought?!

orangeman said...

@RiRi What can I say, they won me over with Don't Stop Believing. Plus Sue Sylvester has to be the best character on TV. It's actually kind of a terrible show. But gosh darn it, those kids can sing.

Mr. natural said...

PHucken' piece of shit!!!!!

Been typing for 20 minutes and then it crapped out on me.

Ya but you guys are all probably happy.

Man it was a great fantasy rant, *sigh*.

moeman said...

o-man cries when he watCHes Glee.

RiRi said...

@orangeman - Sue Sylvester rules! And, yes, their version of Don't Stop Believing was on repeat last May.

Memories, sigh.

Just a hunch but I'm guessing your teaching methods are more Sylvester than Schuster.

GoldenGirl11 said...

just wow

And thanks. Had the song in my head all day.