Friday, April 09, 2010

Dear Habs I Would Like it if You Could Kiss My Ass

From RDS:

Le Canadien ne fera pas les séries si…

Dans un premier temps, précisons quelque chose. Voici les quatre scénarios qui doivent survenir afin d’empêcher le Canadien de faire les séries.

-Le Canadien doit perdre en temps réglementaire contre les Maple Leafs samedi

-Les Bruins doivent récolter au moins un point ce week-end (reçoivent la Caroline samedi et seront au New Jersey dimanche)

-Les Rangers doivent gagner leurs deux matchs contre les Flyers

-Les Flyers doivent récolter au moins un point contre les Rangers

Si un seul de ces scénarios ne se réalise pas, le Tricolore sera de la danse printanière.

They forgot:

- Les joueurs du Canadien doivent ne pas se comporter comme les statues de pénis géantes qui voguaient autour du stade lors de la cérémonie d'ouverture des Jeux Olympiques de Vancouver.

Embrassez ma fesse droite, et ensuite celle de gauche.

32 comments:

Anonymous said...

Je jure à Dieu Omnipotent si les Leafs nous battent et nous ne faisons pas les parties décisives je serai un désordre. Quelles montagnes russes d'une saison. Marquez mes mots bien que, si nous faisons les parties décisives nous le fassions devant le premier rond.

HabsFan29 said...

what do they say about hockey bloggers acting like giant metal penises? (penii?)

b said...

Okay, if I got that right the tag is plan the r*#t. Never a good idea, ethically improper to advise criminal acts. Must counsel to channel your frustrations appp aggh sppppst snork!

Even the New York Times is in on this one.[a href="http://slapshot.blogs.nytimes.com/2010/04/09/the-morning-skate-goalies-may-decide-rangers-flyers-showdown/"]

gillis said...

The last line is actually the funniest thing i have ever read on this site, and i have no idea why.

Pepe Le Pew said...

No problem, Leafs suck !

lawyergirl77 said...

@Pepe - not when they have a French Canadian Goalie in nets for them at the Bell Centre, they don't. Call it the "Biron" effect.

That's the big variable that is going to come back to bite us in the ass.

Pepe Le Pew said...

I just didn't want to think about that...

Go Flyers Go

McPhee said...

4HF, you guys are getting so depressed you are kissing your own ass...

Besen mi culo, pelotudos de huevones!!!

Anonymous said...

Bon point HF4!
Guy, Guy, Guy!
Canadien en 5 :D

hfotwc said...

@ McPhee, I'm getting so depressed that I'll be happy to kiss my own ass for entertainment.

envoye les criss de habs.

moeman said...

Habs need sausage.

~~~

1-0 PHI, NYR on a 4 min PP.

moeman said...

1-1

moeman said...

2-1 NYR.

lawyergirl77 said...

Fucky fuck fuck.

GO FLYERS GO, DAMMIT!!!

hfotwc said...

If the flyers don't win, could Pronger take Avery's head off at least?

moeman said...

3-1 NYR ...

moeman said...

3-2

habsss said...

I hope that if the Habs make the playoffs and if they end up playing Washington that they put up a good fight because I'll never hear the end it. Ah who am I kidding, they'll be crushed.

moeman said...

3-3

moeman said...

4-3 NYR

WV = ziestool

dwgs said...

Down Goes Brown can't really be a Leaf fan site, it's way too clever.
Reasons To Love Kerry Fraser

orangeman said...

Well, Rangers win. The bright side is that as long as their next game doesn't go to OT the Habs are in. Or, you know, they could actually WIN A FUCKING GAME.

Whichever.

Whatever happens, I think we can all agree FUCK YOU LEAFS, YOU FUCKERS.

lawyergirl77 said...

Well, fuck.
The Rangers won.

We're screwed.

L Dude said...

So with the Rags regulation victory, and after the Habs lose....I mean if the Habs lose in regulation, we just have to pray for the next NY-Philly game not to go to OT. Guaranteed - it's going to OT. They best get their point(s) tomorrow night. Of course if the B's lose in regulation tomorrow afternoon AND the Habs lose in regulation, then Sunday becomes really fun to watch as we could clinch with an early B's loss to the Caps OR we might have to wait til the late afternoon game is finished. Holy fuck, I hope they just score about 4 goals in the first 10 minutes against the Leafs and at the very least hang on for the OT loss...

orangeman said...

TSN is already jerking off to the Leafs. They have a video described as:

The Leafs are in Montreal to finish their season, and hope to have a chance to eliminate the Habs.

Sorry, TSN. Despite your wildest wet dreams the laffs can't eliminate the Habs, only a NYR-PHI OT game on Sunday can do that. Yes, it's a technicality, but it's true. The laffs can stop the Habs from clinching on their own, but they can't eliminate them. Again, it's semantics but as an English teacher I'm all about accuracy in writing. I expect to hear the same line from CBC all night tomorrow, too.

Also, fuck you leafs, and fuck you too TSN.

Number31 said...

Rule #1: Never rely on Brian Boucher.

Rule #2: If the Habs play the way they've played the past few games, it won't matter who's in nets, and they don't deserve the playoffs. So CLINCH IT YOU FUCKERS!

GO YOU FUCKING HABS GO!!!!

GoldenGirl11 said...

The only thing this NHL cares about is their $1,000,000 of revenue per playoff game. I don't really care to help the gluttonous owners make more money when a missed playoffs could shake things up enough to make a difference. One round is sweeping (pardon the pun) the problem under the rug. Of course delusions are fun too. Habs - Washington, Habs in 5.

Anonymous said...

I'm sick of the fuckin' lousy play from our not so glorieux. Get the fucking job done against the AHL Leafs,
Sorry, just letting some feelings show there, I'm really all touchy feely WHEN WE WIN.
Get 'er done fuckers!!!

ezzeloharr said...

If you guys are looking for something to cheer you up, Habs have said they won't show up on Saturday night.

habsss said...

Eh even the Washinton Post doesn't think it'll be the Canadiens. They can't be bothered to spell their name correctly.

kevincrumbs said...

No TMS, huh? Regardless of how much this team has made me want to drink over the past few days, Go you fucking Habs go!

Go banana! Go pants!

wv: excre. Hopefully the Habs don't play like excrement tonight.

HabsFan29 said...

@KC - TMS? On the weekend? I'm always too hungover for that. The game thread is up though.