Sunday, April 11, 2010

Huzzah, we're in the playoffs! Meh, we're in playoffs. Leafs 4, Habs 3 (OT)

I guess I should be excited. The Habs are in the playoffs. Uh, yay? I've been told that in this modern parity-filled NHL, it's supposed to be an accomplishment to make the playoffs. Well, the Habs have accomplished that. Now what? This team eked out two points in their last 3 games against non-playoff teams and looked terrible in two of them. They looked somewhat better last night, but IT WAS THE FUCKING LEAFS. The Leafs suck. Barely eking out a point against the Leafs does not give one a lot of hope into a playoff series with some East powerhouse. Anyway, let's hit the old school review format to look back, with an eye to looking forward.

Plan the parade - there was certainly some stuff to like in this game. Start with Vodkov, who seemed determined on his own not to let the point slip away. He attacked offensively like a maniac, and it paid off with a 1G 2A night. And this from a player who has been practically invisible over the last week or two. A Vodkov playing like that in the playoffs will be fun. Gio continued his outstanding play of late, worked hard on every shift like he always does, went to the front of the net on every play like he always does, and scored like he always does. Make him captain right fucking now, before the playoffs. That's one move that would make me feel like we have any chance (to win a game or two, not any series or anything). Gio's linemates, Squid and CHicken, worked hard too and got plenty of shots on net. If they can play like that and start burying some chances, we'll score some goals in the playoffs.

Caveat emptor for all this positive talk - This was the fucking Leafs. The 29th best team in the league. The worst PK in the league. If you can't get 37 shots on them (like the Habs did), you don't even deserve to go to the AHL playoffs.

The sky is falling - JESUS FUCKING CHRIST JARO WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU??? If that's the way you are going to play in a pressure-filled game, sit your ass on the bench right fucking now. Your team gave you three leads and you blew them all. That second goal when you went wandering was, uh, not pretty. File the third goal in the "ones you really really want back" file. And it wasn't just the goals you let in. You looked pretty shaky all night. Sure, you made a couple of nice saves, but dammit you just looked uncomfortable. Like you were scared of the pressure. Say what you want about the Big Fat Wale, but he thrives off pressure. After a brilliant two-shutout weekend a week ago, you let up 5 goals and 4 goals in the last two very very important games. That's, uh, not good. Goalie controversy going into the playoffs! That'll make for a fun next couple of days.

Let's talk Tits. I'm not sure if I heard Andrei's name all night. I'm not sure if I've heard Andrei's name in the last two weeks to be honest. And I definitely know I didn't hear Sergei's name, because JM hates him and scratched him. Of the two Tits, Sergei has clearly played better and worked harder over the last month than his brother. Yet Andrei is the one that gets to be on the second line and on the PP. I'm really at a loss to explain Count Chokula's actions (or rather inactions) any more.

In the VIP room - The Giant Mexican CHicken is nuzzling his beak between Candi's 36DD's in the back, and Vodkov is having a threesome.

Our next evil, evil foe - depending on the outcome of a couple of games this afternoon, the Habs could see any of the Devils, Sabres, or Caps in the first round. Brodeur, Miller, or Jose Theodore. I know which one I would prefer to face.

Playoff tickets on sale at noon today. Who's excited to get some? Exactly.

Media whoring update - you're probably sick and tired of my appearing on CBC Daybreak as much as me, but it's happening again tomorrow morning at 6:4o AM. Ugh. Need coffee already.

36 comments:

J.T. said...

No, no...you don't want Theo in the FIRST round. He's most often good in the first round. You want him in the SECOND round, not-so-fondly remembered as Theo's Round of Death. So, it would be very nice to beat Miller or Brodeur as a warm-up, then get Theo next. Hahahaha!

GoldenGirl11 said...

The last two days of pics are giving me vertigo. Team isn't helping.

L Dude said...

Gee 29, hungover much? The mistakes in this blog!
- They actually eked out 2 points. Remember the Isles. 2 minutes from clinching and...
- WHAT IS WONG WITH HALAK? WHAT IS WONG WITH YOU?! Seriously. That's scary that he's decided now is the time to suck. Maybe he will suck in game one and the big phat whale WILL become TFS©.
- I think the other was just a differing opinion. I think the two Titties have sucked equally, for different reasons. The flat chested one has developed an aversion to taking a hit to make a play. While 46DD just seems lost and/or disinterested. Kovy-lite.

A couple of FUCK YOU's to CBC. Last night at the 'i-desk' Scott Morrison says "there was plenty of twittering, including myself, asking why the Leafs didn't pull the goalie to go for the regulation win." FUCK OFF.
To his credit, Ron Wilson actually said doing that would have messed with the integrity of the game. Really? Ron Wilson? Miracles will never cease.
They also found it funny how Patrice Bergeron was heard saying "GO LEAFS!" after the Bruins won their game. He can fuck right off too. Along with CBC for feeling the need to report on it.

b said...

I really hope that the last week can be explained by bad infection control and that everybody will be over the ViRus by the time that we have to face the OVIE Russe.

By the way, anybody notice that the Caps Chiropracter got popped with a bunch of steroids? HMMM.

HabsFan29 said...

@LD - i was out very late celebrating eking out a playoff berth. thx, fixed.

moeman said...

Leave it to the fucktards at cbc/hnic to piss on the Habs. Its in their contracts. No leaf in the playoffs, suck on that mawrecked and moronsson. Now for the seasonal hnic ratings/viewership drop-off when the not-hockey fans find something better to do.

Congrats to the Sens and Nucks (two other hated by the ceeb teams) for getting to the dance.

Go you fucking Habs!

L Dude said...

@29: I know. Hopefully I didn't come across as serious.

I fully expect the Rangers to win so we'll finish 7th and face the Devils or Sabres. I think Miller scares me more than Brodeur. Let the Bruins face Miller.

Hey, Canada is kicking Norway's ass in the Curling final.
Masters on later today.
A couple of interesting hockey games. You know OV wants to win the scoring title. He'll probably light up the Bruins for 4 points.
Then, in a very similar fashion to the Habs, the Raptors are doing their best to fuck up their playoff hopes and play the equally challenged Bulls later. Too bad it's such a nice fucking day and I SHOULD be outside doing yard work.

HabsFan29 said...

you, serious, LD?

i too should be doing yardwork. i too will watch golf instead.

Jaybird said...

@ L Dude.

Honestly Miller scares you more than Brodeur? I know your a Habs fan C'Mon lol!

I've seen Montreal beat Buffalo. Montreal just doesn't beat Jersey. We can't skate through their muck. Hell we can't even skate through Carolina.

Buffalo is our only shot. And Washington or Pittsburgh in some freakish way.

Good for Ron Wilson though right? I mean at least he has some old school hockey morals. And it was a stupid question by the reporter on top of that since it would actually help us attain a better position if we got an empty netter.

kevincrumbs said...

Hunh. Tickets aren't sold out after being available for two hours?

Moey said...

I'd like to knock Washington and Ovie's other front tooth out in the first round. I'd also like to win the loto.

GoldenGirl11 said...

@Moey
Why stop there? I'd also like to be 5'8".

moeman said...

I really like Bar Refaeli.

WV = scora, as in I hope the Habs scora more than 2 goals per playoff game and one day I hopa to a scora witha Bar Refaeli

Number31 said...

I got my playoff tickets. My brother and I are in agreement: GO FLYERS! (ew I feel dirty saying that). But fuck it, I want entertainment at this price, I don't want the snoozefest from the Devils.

Jaro doesn't do well with pressure unless he's protected. That Bronze medal game was a total meltdown against the best of Finland... Also what's up with his glove?

And who the FUCK benches and crushes young players that have regained a bit of confidence in a crucial game? OH YEA our coach....

If Lou Lamoriello were in charge of this personnel, he'd have fired Chocula and promoted Muller by now.

joshua said...

Matt Cooke getting knocked the Fuck out by Evander Kane.

http://deadspin.com/5514534/heres-matt-cooke-getting-his

Number31 said...

Evander Kane should get Player of the Year for that.

Anonymous said...

Thank fuck we got a point last night. We'd all be crapping our pants right now. NY-Philly heading to shootout.

LD

HabsFan29 said...

Rangers and Philly going to the SO. can you imagine had we lost last night???

HabsFan29 said...

*lost in regulation, i mean.

Anonymous said...

29, we'd all be simultaneously crapping our pants right now.

LD

Anonymous said...

BRING ON THE CAPS BABY!!!

LD

GoldenGirl11 said...

If they're heading to the shoot out and we lost last night we wouldn't be crapping because it would be over. We'd be flabbergasted. Happily we're all... so.... ecstatic... ... about our... uh.... HUGE... victory?

RiRi said...

Caps, here we come!!!

Number31 said...

I LOVE MY PLAYOFF TICKETS NOW!

Anonymous said...

GG, had we lost in regulation, we would still have been in with a Phlyers OT win, like they did. So we were sweatin' for no reason at all. Meh.

Habs in 6.

LD (sign-in not working)

Jaybird said...

BRING ON JOSE THREEORMORE!!!!

Wooooooo!

gillis said...

CAPS SUCK!!!11!!! PLAN THE PARADE!!!

RiRi said...

Be afraid, Ovi, be very afraid.

GoldenGirl11 said...

@LD
Ahh! Yes, then I would be showering now.

habsss said...

Hmm...if the Habs actually show up to play they might have a 5% chance of winning the series. The caps always crap out in the playoffs anyway. I won't be purchasing any tickets any time soon though

orangeman said...

See, there was nothing to worry about. Habs didn't even need a point last night. I'm sure in their heads they're pissed off at themselves for trying so hard when it didn't matter anyway.

Caps are the only possible opponent that they had a winning record against this year (2-1-1) and the were all entertaining games (6-5, etc.). Now to wait for the schedule. I can watch every other day this week, so of course the games will be on the opposite days.

And fuck you CBC. When Ron fucking Wilson displays more class and integrity than you its obvious how pathetic you are. And without the Habs in the playoffs your ratings would be cut in half (remeber that poll earlier this year that said the majority of Canadians believe the Habs are Canada's team?). Talk about biting the hand.

kevincrumbs said...

TSN to broadcast the series. I'd still rather have McSplooge instead of Bob Cole.

orangeman said...

Isn't that weird, though? Sens aren't playing on Saturday, so HNIC is going to have an all American prime time match-up? I wonder how that all worked out. I guess they'd rather give Leafs fans Buffalo than submit them to the Habs.

Not Geoff Molson said...

You would think that the Habs would be the number 1 game on CBC...but the little fuckity fucks in their Front Street universe decided against the Sainte-Flanelle.

Why doesn't Ron McLean just state on a broadcast that the CBC hates the Habs and we'll accept the fact that they're not much more than the Pathetic Pension Plan Pimps.

That being said - McSplooge and Cuthbert (even Guy Smiley Gord Miller) are a better listen than Bob Cole and whoever is snuggling up to him in the pressbox.

Go Pants! - and beat those Caps...just to piss off the CBC and Bettman.

HabScot said...
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HabScot said...
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