Thursday, October 22, 2009

Gather 'round kids, it's an Isles game preview and open thread

Oh hello. I thought we could have a nice little chat about tonight's tilt against the Islanders. We've got a 7:00 start in Montreal, and it's on TSN for all your McSplooging needs. Both teams are coming off wins that ended losing streaks. Both teams still looking for an identity. Lighthouse Hockey is the place to go to see if the Isles have an identity besides league doormat and Wang jokes.

Oh Habs, who loves ya baby. Well, if we could score goals we'd love you more. Gionta seems to be the only one doing it on a semi-regular basis, and Squid and Pleks continue to lead the overall scoring. The whole Giant Mexican Squid looked decent against the Thrash. Has anyone seen Gui! lately? No, me neither. ZomGui! in the house. Hal Gill has zero points and is -5. Someone's boy CHips has zero points and is -6. Ugh.

For the Isles, John Tavares returns to the scene of his drafting. He's off to a fine start with 3G 4A. The Isles' leading scorer is actually some dude named Matt Moulson. With a last name like that, shouldn't he be playing for us? Okposo is doing well too. The Isles goalies without DiPietro (i.e. Roloson and Biron) are struggling.

We've got some lineup changes! Métro looks ready to go. He practiced yesterday with Gui! and Dagger. Where was Mad Max? On the second line trying to get some more offence going from the wingers there. You know who would make a good winger on that line? This guy on the left:


Here I am, goin' to Hamilton, my leg hurts, my butt hurts, my chest hurts, my face hurts, and like that ain't enough, I gotta pee all over myself.

We still don't have much to say about this team. Still feeling it out. As HF4 said yesterday in the game review,"Not really convinced I had a good time, but I'm staying polite enough to not appear as if I'm on the fence, which I totally am."

For your post-game adult entertainment, go have sex with your spouse or significant other. He or she misses you. Then tell the rest of us about it in the comments.

81 comments:

Jimmy G said...

Don't get me wrong, I love tits, but this picture with Bob and SK74 is probably my favourite yet. It makes me giggle.

At least it has Little Tits in it...

Jimmy G said...

Dave Hodge is asking, What was Bob's best or worst move?

So far, I'm loving the Giant Mexican Squid (although they'd better start finishing some of those chances). I just wish Bob'd kept somebody, like Kovy, for the second line, lest Pleks return to Zombie form for want of a linemate that can score.

Gill, Mara, well...

And, yes, I am bored.

GoldenGirl11 said...

Just to clarify, that is pic #2 which is missing pic #1. The CH is backwards on purpose as the bus was turned around this morning but I didn't have time to flip the CH... but you know what happens when you have to explain the joke...

WV: fixet, as in hey fellas, I woulda fixet had I known it was going solo

Jaybird said...

Here's an idea. Call Sergei up and send either Latendresse or Pacioretty down to build some confidence. We need secondary scoring and I have memories of the tits bros. tearing it up on the same line.

AK 46 - ZombiePleks - SK 74

= Possibly a Martin defying goal or two!

Moey said...

@Jaybird, unfortunately those memories included Lang as the center. *she grabs a tissue*

South Shore Habs Fan said...

The real reason behind the Sergei send-down... allegedly

Dunno whether to believe that or not, but it seems plausible.


Bob's best move: not trying to outbid the Leafs for Dou$harek.

HabsFan29 said...

@SSHF - wow, that sure is an interesting story if true

moeman said...

GG11's instant classic bus pic reminded me of this.

northern_sooner said...

Tony (Man Tits) Marinaro said this morning on the Team990 that there was no international incident between the Mexican and L'il Tits. He alluded (love that word) that the incident was ACTUALLY between the Mexican and a PTBNL and that it resulted in the party breaking up.

The Team is also continuing its unapologetic lobbying for McSplooge as the next Habs GM. PJ Stock appears to be a)unconvinced or b)holding out for a lap dance from Marisa Miller, since he suggested Pierre might be less than qualified.

GoldenGirl11 said...

@Moe
That's what that is. Ok here's the written version:
pic#1: jon voight and sergei headed out of town. Same mood as original midnight cowboy.
pic #2: bob and sergei headed back in to town with the bus going in the opposite direction. Bob and Jon in the same shirt. Episode was so quick that girl is still waving.....

Hilarity ensues.

Oh, never mind. Bug HF29 for the full post.

Jaybird said...

Marisa Miller's Ace:

http://www.drunkenstepfather.com/index.php/2009/10/20/marisa-millers-hot-bikini-change-of-the-day/

moeman said...

La Isla, Gionta!

(Spoken:)
réjean y bertrand son fanáticos

Last night I dreamt of Saku Koivu
Just like I'd always done, now it feels so wrong
A young man with a heart like The Rocket
It all seems like yesterday, the CH 'C' so far away

Trottier was the Islanders' 'C'queeze
His leadership skills were there to see
This is where Habs fans long to be
La Isla, Gionta!

And when the Giant Mexican Squid line plays
Its firewagon hockey on display
Ring through my ears and sting my eyes
With their Smurfish lullaby

I fell in love with Saku Koivu
Warm heart carried with the 'C', he called to me
With La Sainte Flannelle I'll always be
I prayed that the days would last
They went so (U)FAst

Messier was the Oilers 'C'queeze
His leadership skills were there to see
This is where Habs fans long to be
La Isla, Gionta!

I want to be where the sun warms the parade route
When it's time for fiesta you can watch them go by
Beautiful faces, no cares in this world
Where a Hab loves a Cup, and Habs fans love their team

Last night I dreamt of Saku Koivu
It all seems like yesterday, the CH 'C' so far away

Yzerman was the Red Wings' 'C'queeze
His leadership skills were there to see
This is where Habs fans long to be
La Isla, Gionta!

Ta-la-ta-ta-taa

Beliveau was the CH's 'C'queeze
His leadership skills were there to see
This is where Habs fans long to be
La Isla, Gionta!

La-la-la-la-la-la-laaa
La Isla, Gionta!
La-la-la-la-la-la-laaa
La Isla, Gionta!
Pa-pa-la-pa-pa pa-pa-pa-pahaaa
Aha, aha-ahaaa
La Isla, Gionta!
Ahaa, aha-ahaaa...

HabsFan29 said...

well done moeman, I feel like dancing

moeman said...

@HF29, hopefully you dance better than .

GoldenGirl11 said...

@Moe
Well that made my day.

bea.habs.fan said...

that was awe inspiring.
i was also swaying to the music.
I'm curious as to whether anyone linked to this site actually works.

I'm overwhelmed by the depth of hidden talent in this group.
makes me wish that I'd have that same reaction with our presnt hab version

moeman said...

@bea.habs.fan "I'm curious as to whether anyone linked to this site actually works."

On da intertubes, no one knows if you are fucking da dog. Also, get an extremely high speed connection and watch the kids at the office try to keep up.

moeman said...

For Moey, tonight's beverage of CHoice (it, is, a good, one).

moeman said...

@GG11 "Well that made my day."

So did today's game babe pic.

GoldenGirl11 said...

Glad you enjoyed it. It's from my Xmas vacation last year. it was so awkward when the airline lost my luggage but it all worked out for the best....

moeman said...

@GG11, love the fit on those jeans.

GoldenGirl11 said...

@Moe
I'm a slave to my Parasucos, what can I say.

moeman said...

@GG11, "what can I say"

Careful with such open-ended (pun intended) questions. I'm no lawyer but I can twist and shout as good as some of this blog's owners (OK, maybe not HF29).

Also, réjean tremblay is a fucking trou de cul. (hope he doesn't sue, how could he its fucking true)

GoldenGirl11 said...

@Moe
So can I, Moe, so can I.

moeman said...

Its early in the season and Bob could fire him tomorrow but methinks our CoaCH needs a prescient nickname. I'm suggesting YoJa and not only because of the ears.

Examples;

“Do or do not... there is no try, shootouts rule.”

“Size matters not, ... Look at me. Judge me by size, do you cbc?”

“[Gui!:] I can’t believe it. [YoJa:] That is why you fail.”

“The leaf side clouds everything. Impossible to see the future is.”

“The boy you trained, gone he is. Consumed by Hamilton Bulldogs.”

“Pain, suffering, death I feel. Something terrible has happened. Bertrand Tremblay and Rejean Raymond are in pain. Terrible pain. Fuckers!”

“Erm. Put a shield on my saber I must” <-- ! (No squirrels but still).

“Ahhh! YoJa's little friend you seek!, Meet Gionta!"

“Younglings, younglings gather 'round. Not you Sergei, must fuck off, you will.”

GG11, if the FHF Masters agree, please PhotoYojaize Jacques Martin.

Moey said...

@moeman, thanks for the wine tip. I'll check it out. It's going to take a couple of bottles tonight to drown out McSplooge, but on the bright side, Mr. Moey is absent for the next couple of days so I can yell and scream to my heart's content.

moeman said...

Stolen from a G&M comment;

Hey what do Dou$harek and Timmins, Ont have in common??

They will both be -26 by the time Christmas rolls around!

(NB - slightly edited)

HabsFan29 said...

ok hockey let's go.

we could really use a 2-game winning streak

HabsFan29 said...

ok im nervous. and it's like game 9

moeman said...

@HF29, dance it off.

Moey said...

It's gonna be a long night, Taveres is McSplooges splooge du jour. I;m getting a glass of wine.

moeman said...

peeair is a nasal bore.

HabsFan29 said...

this choice of idiotic BB vs. mcsplooge i have to deal with continues to perplex

HabsFan29 said...

mexiCAN!

moeman said...

@HF29, it could be worse, t could be bobcole.

Mexican!

moeman said...

Tequila me HF29.

GoldenGirl11 said...

Ya think Streit is related to the matzo meal company? Just asking. A fine product.

South Shore Habs Fan said...

Tavares vs. Gill is not something I want to witness

HabsFan29 said...

and why is that not a penalty?

HabsFan29 said...

hey we're playing decent hockey here

moeman said...

Yup, now for a PP goal, SVP.

moeman said...

MAB!

HabsFan29 said...

quel tir

GoldenGirl11 said...

THE UROLOGIST!!!

moeman said...

Hey gord 'chinless' miller, fuck you, you fuck.

WV = goiders

HabsFan29 said...

well that was the best period we've played in years. or at least what seems like years

moeman said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
HabsFan29 said...

apparently i missed something funny

moeman said...

Deleted upthread cuz Blogger is whack.

hahaha@rayferraro

GoldenGirl11 said...

Caught myself saying to the boys "but it is just the islanders". What is it about wandering 40 years in the desert and seeing the glass half empty (and - once I'm asking - eating BEFORE dinner so as to not eat on an empty stomach)?

moeman said...

Why hasn't any NHL team hired rayferraro as some kinda coach? Maybe because the Whalers aren't in Hartford, home of the less-than-monsterish coach peeair.

~~~

Here comes dodgemail! I sent dave a suggestion that he dye half his helmet hair blue. Cross your fingers he reads my email.

moeman said...

4.5 of the 5 dodgemails that make the screen are categorized as part of the 'worse', then dave piles on and on. Fucktard.

moeman said...

peeair "the little three'.

How tall is that arrogant asshole?

HabsFan29 said...

ok another period like the last one. pretty please

that's one ugly graphic of suck on TSN

HabsFan29 said...

PatCHes!!

moeman said...

Pax! to da Max!

boob gainey said...

The boys have finally figured out Martin's system.

Either that or the Isles suck.

HabsFan29 said...

McSplooge is allowed to interact with the backup goalie?

scrappy!

moeman said...

Dats our boy CHips!

moeman said...

peeair is as tall as TFS™ sitting down.

Moey said...

Pricey better not bend over.

HabsFan29 said...

can i start complaining it should be at least 5-0 by now?

moeman said...

@HF29, you wanna sound like peeair?

HabsFan29 said...

i would really give myself a headache

Moey said...

Gotta give McSplooge some credit, his grasp of the obvious is damned impressive.

HabsFan29 said...

nice rugby scrum there

habsss said...

Anyone else hear "You fucking queer" on TSN?

moeman said...

gordmiller = condescending fucktard.

HabsFan29 said...

@habsss -totally. the fans were eerily quiet at that moment too, it was clear

moeman said...

Also, MAB! has more goals than Vinny Lecavalier. Hope the eyes-wooled-over Montréal/Québec media wads bring this up in their post game séparatistes screeds tonight and tomorrow. Also, the more the Habs do well, the more réjean tremblay's dick shrinks, to the dismay of bertrand raymond's tiny mouth.

... and thnx to the 4HFers that own this expensive blog for letting me rant sans subpoena.

matt - ftc said...

moeman...i to thank the 4hfers for letting you rant on this blog.

moeman said...

SOGs are 30-12, so far.

TFS™ must want to punCH (the right next to him and in love) peeair in the face.

Also, weird how peeair hasn't mentioned his lover burke tonight. NTTIAWWT.

~~~

ack!

matt - ftc said...

wow...i can only imagine what they'd be saying if price did that over at HIO

HabsFan29 said...

i was too stunned to respond. now im starting to freak out

HabsFan29 said...

Squid! PP!

I may cry with happiness

HabsFan29 said...

now we're having fun

moeman said...

Squid's post-game comments are usually fun. Methinks tonight's'll be funner.

Laps from the right side, nice and for two reasons, one , the Coach put him there, two, the media yippers were ripping the idea of Laps on the right side all fucking day.

matt - ftc said...

on an unrelated note. i think i vote for the third cheer in the pepsi canada commercial

HabsFan29 said...

that game was alright

HabsFan29 said...

i almost want to watch antichambre. almost.

moeman said...

Don't.

et

Bonsoir me ami(e)s.