Wednesday, October 07, 2009

Welcome Giant Mexican Squid! - Canucks quickie game preview and open thread

So it looks like commentor "robert" was the first to coin the "Giant Mexican Squid" moniker for the top line. It ain't no "Danse à Dix" line, but it's pretty good. And if it gets us Photoshops like this, well...

So sorry about the Flames review. We're sure Panger was stuck in court (hopefully as a lawyer not a defendant) and never got to it. I had not really planned much of a preview either, because I expected you to have his review to read. We suck, I know. We'll give you your money back for this one. UPDATE! we'll take your admission fee now, Panger came through. Scroll down.

So, quickly - 10 PM EST start in Vanc. It's on TSN, let's hope Maguire is doing the early game. Nucks Misconduct is your source for all things Nucks. Price will start in his home province; JM said all other lineup changes will only be known at game time. Sneaky! Hot Habs are MOEmaN, Mara, and Pleks maybe? All of Vancouver's eyes are on the now-sucky Luongo (loved MYFO's take on it) and the Nucks 3-game losing streak to start the season. There's a jinx if I've ever heard one. Because of the late hour of the game on the East coast, your post-game adult entertainment is on channel 213 on Vidéotron (MEXCE), The Muse. "Let adult superstar Stormy Daniels become your own personal seductive muse" says the description. I hope my PVR will catch it for me, I'll be long asleep by then.

Let's hear those Dirty Mexican Mustache thoughts in the comments

78 comments:

moeman said...

"Dirty Mexican MustaCHe", "Giant Mexican Squid" methinks Dirty SanCHez Parée is next?

HabsFan29 said...

gotta love TSN's That's Hockey opening with Ron Wilson saying "we stink"

moeman I would be scared to see what GG11 would do with a dirty sanchez Parée

HabsFan29 said...

the GG11 part of my comment did not come out right

The Gate To The Groin For Yannick Bertrand said...

i fear that "pleks maybe?" will become his official name on game previews this season.

it would also make a pretty great jersey.

moeman said...

@HF29, GG11's fhfantastic photo CHopping skillz would do 'Dirty SanCHez Parée' right. I'm picturing bertrand and réjean in a messy ménage-à-trois with bergie, NTTIAWWT.

moeman said...

Lou eek! Lou eek, oh no

You gotta go

Aye-yi-yi-yi, I said

Lou eek! Lou eek, oh baby

You gotta go



Funny little whalefan waits for thee

Catch the shit across the Canuck sea

Sail that shit, all alone

Never know if you'll make it home



Lou eek! Lou eek, oh no

You gotta go

Aye-yi-yi-yi, I said

Lou eek! Lou eek, oh baby

You gotta go



Three nights, three games, you epic failed

Think of Raycroft, constantly

In your crease, he dreams he's there

He smell the mushrooms in the air



Lou eek! Lou eek, oh no

You gotta go

Aye-yi-yi-yi, I said

Lou eek! Lou eek, oh baby

You gotta go



Okay, Lou, give it to 'em, um, next game, OK?



GUI!TAR SOLO



See Canada, the 2010 Olympics above

It won't be long, you'll soon be loved

Canada'll take Carey in her arms again

And you can be backup to the best again



Lou eek! Lou eek, oh no

You gotta go

Aye-yi-yi-yi, I said

Lou eek! Lou eek, oh baby

You gotta go



Let's take it the fuck out of here now…

Let's Go Habs!!

GoldenGirl11 said...

Well, step away from the computer to throw some dinner together and look what I missed.

Agenda for the evening:
help 10 with book report
make nutritionally balanced lunches with note "love mom" and lipstick kiss in every lunchbox
sing 3 lullaby before bed
listen to 13 practice bar mitzvah
have "don't do drugs" heart to heart with 15
find moral from the latest episode of family guy
bake apple pie
put on cold cream and curlers
google Dirty Sanchez Parée/whip together Photoshop ménage/TiVo 213 after hours

@29 I appreciate the retraction.

gillis said...

@moeman: having listened to the real recording, those might as well be the real lyrics!

moeman said...

@GG11,

help 10 with book report

~ http://scholar.google.ca/ is your friend

make nutritionally balanced lunches with note "love mom" and lipstick kiss in every lunchbox

~ the smarter GG's will be selling those lip smacks

sing 3 lullaby before bed

~ Mr. GG is a lucky, lucky, lucky man

listen to 13 practice bar mitzvah

~ invisible earplugs are your best friends

have "don't do drugs" heart to heart with 15

~ kudos

find moral from the latest episode of family guy

~ giggidy giggidy

bake apple pie

~ easy on the cinnamon, add a spalsh of real lemon juice and make sure your bottom crust is baked

put on cold cream and curlers

~ my eyes! (and/or giggidy giggidy)

google Dirty Sanchez Parée/whip together Photoshop ménage/TiVo 213 after hours

~ have fun

HabsFan29 said...

GUI!TAR SOLO

how long have you been waiting to use that one? worth the wait, except for the spit beverage on my screen

and i appreciate your use of the original lyrics, which unlike our teenage friend gillis, i do know. outstanding.

moeman said...

@ gillis, parodies R fun, I try to keep em' as close to the original as possible

~~~

spalsh = splash (in case GG11 figured she needed to google spalsh, which btw ... http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=spalsh

moeman said...

@HF29, the Gui!tar riff was spontaneous, kinda like Gui! goals.

GoldenGirl11 said...

@Moe
all in the name of humour...
- stopped helping with homework about 3 kids ago
- never kissed a napkin with lipstick in my life but did put a pic of myself making a "behave or I'll kill you later" face in 15's lunchbox for years
- Only "lullaby" I ever sang was Thunder Road and all 4 cried every time. And yes he is very lucky.
- Dr GG is in charge of bar mitz. I'm not even sure the date
- 15 is a hypochondriac athlete. Wakes us up ocasionally at 2 am with things like "I have a pain right here. Is that normal? Are you sure!?!?" or "I had pine nuts 3 hours ago can I still have an allergic reaction? Will I die?!!!!" but I do love the awkward dinner table "porn is normal but don't think it's real!" lecture.
- don't enjoy family guy
- bubby makes the best apple pie. I will pass along the added touches
- don't wear cold cream
- I will
-
-

kevincrumbs said...

For all this talk about how the Canucks will break out tonight because they're due, I prefer this stat, courtesy of Nucks Misconduct:

"The Canucks have won seven in a row against the Habs on home ice while they have just one loss in their last 12 head-to-head meetings versus Montreal (10-1-1)"

Which means we're due to a win in their building tonight. I'll take a 1-0 bore win, even though they always seem to completely destroy us when we play in Vancouver.

GoldenGirl11 said...

@29
Even the guys singing didn't know the words. No actual lyrics exist. Big controversy once upon a time. Something inappropriate about going across the sea or through a long dark tunnel or something or other.

HabsFan29 said...

this game is never gonna start

kevin I find your "we're more due" philosophy interesting and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter

HabsFan29 said...

hey look Panger's out of court!

HFF33 aka Panger said...

Hey everyone! If you're looking to kill some time before the Cancucks game, I just posted the Flames game review.

Can't wait to see Luongo and TFS head-to-head. Anyone wanna bet that Yzerman is in the buiding tonight?

moeman said...

Drop da puck!

Montrealiste1 said...

I actually like those late night games... study, than get drunk and start shouting at my tv during the second period.

Btw GG11,ur freekin great!

GoldenGirl11 said...

@Montreal
Merci

lawyergirl77 said...

Fuck, I'm so tired.
Shit day at work.
Just made dinner for Mr. LG77 and his three friends (for those of you keeping track at home - homemade sundried tomato alfredo spinach fettucini, roasted veggies with a balsamic reduction and lemon garlic marinated drumsticks)
I have work I should do for my trial that starts in 10 days.

Meh, fuck it.
*puts on hockey jersey*

When's the puck gonna drop, already??!!

WV (too good): Shica. As in - I used to be the Shica (yes, I know how it's actually spelled) Goddess of CSL

kevincrumbs said...

Have the Pens/Coyotes game on and God, a library is louder than the Igloo at this point. Also, there are a good number of empty seats, which is a bit sad. Come on, you're Stanley Cup champs and can't see out the building?

Also, my beverage of choice for tonight is a six pack (hopefully not all of them) of Lagunitas Imperial Red Ale.

kevincrumbs said...

LG77: That sounds delicious. Hope your guests at least brought the wine.

lawyergirl77 said...

Kevin - nope, I pulled out my already chilled bottle of Ménage à Trois white wine (yes, it's actually called that) (but the red is better) (trust me) (I normally don't like red wine as much, but this shit is gooooood!! *slurp*)

Did I mention my Thanksgiving Extravaganza on Sunday? I won't be content until all of my friends are in a turkey/sugar coma...

Ooh! Banana bread is beeping!

moeman said...

joel bouchard says he's dropping a Twoonie on the Nucks tonight whilst saying TFS™'s 2 games so far amount to a 'party'. bouchard rhymes with fucktard.

HabsFan29 said...

FINALLY the puck drops.

Goodnight everyone!

kevincrumbs said...

Carey looks a lot better without his hair gelled up like a stupid porcupine.

Looking forward to the Canucks starting 0-4.

Mmm.... turkey (Homer voice)

moeman said...

No peeair!!!!!!

GoldenGirl11 said...

@29 and Moeman
Did my googling and all I can say is I think I just found the gutter that I refuse to enter. Eeeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwww.

@LG
Now I'm glad that food loving DR GG doesn't get involved in this blog. A woman that cooks with zest after a long day at an actual income earning job! A half cous cous, half vus vus dream come true (I'm looking at you, 4). And there are (said in a whisper) shiksas in CSL? Hey, maybe we were neighbors. That made me laugh.

moeman said...

Good on ya GG11.

moeman said...

Quiet crowd, almost acc'ish.

HabsFan29 said...

if the time won't put me to sleep, this game will

GoldenGirl11 said...

Between the squid, the mexican stache and Sanchez I need more than a shower. I need a mikvah.

And is it my imagination or does Pierre Houde keep saying "passe à Hitler"? Kinda taking the pur laine thing a little far, no?

HabsFan29 said...

TSN interviews the players during breaks now?

moeman said...

@HF29, is ferraro shorter than Squid?

@GG11, rds loves to pull the wool over the eyes of the true Habs fans. Keep us posted (I'm gonna try to bear gord miller for a while as brunet is unbearable ...)

moeman said...

Lou's mask needs work and is that a VaCHon cake logo on the Nuncks jerseys?

HabsFan29 said...

FUCK

moeman said...

ack.

kevincrumbs said...

Ah fuck... Gill, Swiss Miss II.

Montrealiste said...

Fuck... Nice goal tho.

HabsFan29 said...

moeman i did think it was the Vachon logo too. WTF is that thing?

moeman said...

ouCH!

Boob Gainey said...

Time to face facts.

We have 4 good players on this team.

kevincrumbs said...

Dammit. Fucking injuries and shitty schedule to start the season. Oh, and lack of shots on goal.

HabsFan29 said...

jebus

GoldenGirl11 said...

OHHHHHHH! EDLER! What would really be great is if he played on a line with Bob Goebel.

"Elder à Goebel... Cammalleri quitte la glace"

kevincrumbs said...

FUCK THIS SHIT. Can we just forfeit all Western road trips and just rest up in Montreal?

moeman said...

Van 3 - Price 0

moeman said...

Time to CHip away at the score.

kevincrumbs said...

@Moeman: More like Van 3 - Canadiens defencemen 0.

moeman said...

@kc, I'm suggesting TFS™ is all alone out there.

Boob Gainey said...

Shots 14-4.

Are there any other sports to follow? I hear the world cup is coming up.

moeman said...

Its early in the season but HSSGill might need to be anCHored for a game, say Game 1 at the Bell Centre, otherwise he may get Breezer'd beyond belief.

lawyergirl77 said...

Fuck this shit - goodnight everyone.

The HMCS Gill needs to go into drydock, STAT. It's fucking embarrassing.

(Before I go - GG, I lived in the part of CSL next to Deliboys and in the same building as everyone's bubby and zaidie. Oy.)
(oh, and your joke about the Mikvah killed!)

lehab said...

well i was going to hit the sack but i see the habs have shit the bed. guess i will sleep on the couch. btw i love the picture...can i get a trademark on the giant mexican squid line?

kevincrumbs said...

Finally, a PP!

kevincrumbs said...

Finally, a PP goal!

Great looking PP.

kevincrumbs said...

If I was a Canucks fan, I'd want to punch Ferraro in the face for continually ripping on Luongo on TSN.

kevincrumbs said...

PP looks pretty good tonight.

lehab said...

well at least they showed up this period... there is still hope

lehab said...

burrows had his chance with ferraro

kevincrumbs said...

Ugh. Just not our night. This team'll be fine down the road.

kevincrumbs said...

Crap looking PP.

kevincrumbs said...

5-1. It's over now.

All I hope for tonight is that no one gets injured.

orangeman said...

Maybe it's my fault. I tuned in right when the announcer said it was the Canucks' first shot of the 2nd. 2 Van goals and a shit PP in the 5 mins I've been watching.

In any event, this is going to be a looooooooong season. Actually, scratch that. The season will be over for the Habs by January.

GoldenGirl11 said...

@LG
Deli Boys is the greatest. Glad for you that you made it out of the shtetl. I bet it took a good 6 months to get the bubby and zaide smell out of your clothes but would it kill you to pick up a phone once in a while to say hello or see if they're still alive like you care?

Is Vigneault coaching the Habs? With every goal he looks more and more pissed off. Maybe it's the whole Hitler thing.

Boob Gainey said...

OK, we suck, but two of their goals were on PP that were given for obvious dives.

Anyway, I hope Jacques has another system. This one blows.

South Shore Habs Fan said...

WV: demisal

I hope we're not bearing witness to the demisal of Carey's confidence. Where the fuck is the D...

(to be fair, Hamrlik and Spacek have been great)

Fuck this, I give up.

kevincrumbs said...

Vancouver is my closest NHL city. Let me say that I am eternally thankful that I have never made the six hour drive to watch the Habs in Vancouver.

South Shore Habs Fan said...

(one last thing)

Fun fact: Hal Gill makes the exact same salary as Dennis Seidenberg, and was signed earlier.

Seidenberg: 30 points, 146 hits, 160 blocked shots, 29 giveaways.
Hal Gill: 10 points, 78 hits, 112 blocked shots, 45 giveaways, 0 speeding tickets.

kevincrumbs said...

Alright, I'm done. 8:30 left in the third, down four and I'm fucking hungry. Time to take off my Habs jersey, put on some music and make dinner.

Go Habs Go.

orangeman said...

Stop the bleeding. Whole new team (except for Gainey) same result. Conclusion?

Anonymous said...

Hey, Luongo is from Montreal and Price is from BC....do you think we could, you know...

WV: "trater". How appropriate.

kevincrumbs said...

(Waiting for pasta to boil)

Meh. If we win in Edmonton, that's three wins out of five on a road trip. I'll take it.

The Gate To The Groin For Yannick Bertrand said...

Hal Gill is the worst thing I've ever seen on a pair of skates.

He has Breezer's defencive skills, O'B's puck-control, and the speed of an injured Laraque.

Can someone please just shed a little happiness on my otherwise miserable night and point out one good thing he does for this team. Anything at all that makes him worthy of wearing the CH.

Van Hab said...

I don't need to go further than to say that I was at Two Parrots on Granville watching this game. Beers are $1.99 after every Canucks goal. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't cheering for Vancouver after it was 5-1. The game was over, and all I could hope for was more cheap beer, and the Canucks DELIVERED!!!

The Canucks Of Vancouver said...

I was also at The Two Parrots. It is quite the good place to watch Canucks games. You are right. The 1.99 beers are great.

Go Canucks Go !!!