Friday, October 30, 2009

It's a Taxi ride in Chi-town - Blackhawks Game Preview and Open Thread

OK, time to regroup. Deep breath everyone. If we lose tonight, then we can go fucking apeshit.

Waiting in the airport cab line details - 8:30 PM ET start at the United Center. Both teams coming off losses, the Hawks to the Predators last night in a game where by all accounts they were terrible. This is the only meeting of the year between these two teams. Habs have lost 4 straight on the road.

Pay your fare to - Second City Hockey is the best place for all your Hawks info.

The Elaine Nardo memorial hotties - Squid has 5 points in his last 3 games, but really, only TurtlePlek belongs in this space. Remember last year when he was constantly in the skanky space? What the hell happened?

"You talkin' to me? You talkin' to me?" - yes, Gui! and Tits, I am talking to you. And I'm gonna start talking to Mad Max too, who seems to be more and more invisible every game. And every player who had a giveaway in the Pens game. So like, half the team.

Worth way more than 20 cents - The Christo-wall, after some shakiness early this season, is 2-1-0, 0.67, .973 in his last 3 games. Kaner leads the team with 10 points.

The Louie DePalma memorial uglies - while Patrick Sharp is tied with Kane for the team lead in points, he's pointless in his last four.

Who's driving - From yesterday's practice, the Giant Mexican Tits line has been reunited! And it feels so good. Pleks has Squid and Mad Max on his wings. TFS returns to the starting spot to try and S the F. For Chicago, Toews is day to day with a concussion.

Reverend Jim words of wisdom - "The ability to witness two men stand toe to toe in the spirit of sportsmanship and pummel each other into insensibility is what separates us from the animals." Oh BGL, will we ever see you again?

Post-game adult entertainment - more Giant Mexican Tits, in video form.

Gratuitous Simpsons Quote (lap dance to the Jamboroo) - "Now let's enjoy the Miami of Canada — Chicago!"

105 comments:

Jimmy G said...

I love Giant Mexican Squid as a line, but Giant Mexican Tits has a much better ring to it.

Boob Gainey said...

Finally, a contest Maple Leafs can't lose.

(NSFW)

kevincrumbs said...

Giant Mexican Tits and no Salma Hayek? Just sayin'...

HabsFan29 said...

@Kevin - i don't put links in the preview for no reason. start clicking

kevincrumbs said...

@HF29: Yup, I just realised my mistake. Got too eager for Salma Hayek. I'm sure you'll understand.

HabsFan29 said...

i don't blame you kevin. we all want as much GMT as possible

L Dude said...

For Salma Hayek, I say "Thank you baby Jesus!" (feel free to pronounce that Hey-Soose)

I fortunately missed that last game (so maybe it really didn't happen!) but plan on tuning in tonight. And tomorrow of course. I propose the GMS line not be put back tomorrow either. I'm not certain, but I know Bud Light wears the blue and white, so may be property of the Leafs. And we all know what he can do to Giant Squids, Mexican or otherwise I suspect. At least if you watch too much TV like myself, you know.

GoldenGirl11 said...

I hope Kane the brat gets a beating. Just saying.

WV: twentycents, as in I'm a rich hockey player and yet I beat a man up over twentycents and then teared up in public and apologized to the fans for letting them down but not the victim... (ok, I made that up but it's true)

Stephen Harper said...

This site is juvenile and offensive.

GO LEAFS!

Pope Benedict XVI said...

How about some sexy pictures for the rest of us?

That Sidney Crosby for example. I think they call him the kid.

HabsFan29 said...

I am not appreciating this 8:30 PM start. the meth kicked in a while ago. what to do for 1:20 while i wait?

HabsFan29 said...

@your holiness - heh

GoldenGirl11 said...

@29
light the shabbat candles and pray

Sleepy said...

After doing a google search for Salma Hayek, I think that GMT should stay together for the season. On second thought the only thing that should separate them is me.

Don't normally participate in the WV game but it was "inediple" it just seems fitting

gillis said...

Anyobdy else watching the rocket documentary on rds right now?

HabsFan29 said...

@gillis - didn't know it was on. watching it now. did i miss the riot?

HabsFan29 said...

alright let's do this thing!!

anyone out there on this party Hallowe'en friday?

HabsFan29 said...

Giant Mexican Tits on the ice!!!

I'm turned on

HabsFan29 said...

oh great, more injuries

GoldenGirl11 said...

I think the goatee guy on rds looks like he's part man, part goat. Kinda like Danny Devito in Hercules. He can make his eyebrows do that "v" thing. He's icky.

GoldenGirl11 said...

Gill just blocked the puck!!

copyranter said...

Watching the Chicago broadcast on Center Ice; Olczyk is trying hard to argue that that wasn't a cheap hit.

HabsFan29 said...

well that was a waste

lehab said...

i'm getting pissed as i am stuck at work and missing the GMT action.

lawyergirl77 said...

MOTHERFUCKER!

God, I can't believe we just pissed away that powerplay.

Sigh

Evenin' 29 and GG!

HabsFan29 said...

LG in da house! tell me what fabulous dinner you whipped up tonight

GoldenGirl11 said...

LG! Where have you been? All work and seasons tix make for a very quiet commentor.

HabsFan29 said...

blech

lawyergirl77 said...

FUCK.

God, we suck on the road... We really are Jekyll/Hyde as a team...

GoldenGirl11 said...

@29
so LGs the cook and I'm the pornographer, huh? I'll have you know I made a fab fresh basil/salmon/rosé sauce pasta last night and Lebanese chicken tonight...

FUCK! I can't take another bad game.

lawyergirl77 said...

Sadly no faboo dinner tonight, peeps. Dins was a bag of microwave popcorn. But it was the awesome contraband kind from the states... mmmmm... kettle corn...

And yeah - GG, I've been stuck in trial hell. This is my first day off in 20 days!

lawyergirl77 said...

Ooh - GG, that sounds delish!

lawyergirl77 said...

Fuck - the urologist is KILLING me!!

GoldenGirl11 said...

LG
outstanding! Fresh or smoked salmon. Males everyone think it's two different dishes. So simple. Olive oil, garlic, chillie flakes, whole canned tomatoes, cooking cream and fresh basil. Marcello Hazan. Greatest pasta cookbook ever.

HabsFan29 said...

jeez pedro that's dumb

GoldenGirl11 said...

Why do all the average goalies play so well against us?

HabsFan29 said...

a scoring chance. finally. only 17 minutes in

HabsFan29 said...

frankly we're lucky to only be down 1-0

kevincrumbs said...

Hawks goal was lucky but they dominated us for the whole period. God, this team sucks at scoring goals.

kevincrumbs said...

Pens down 3-1 to Columbus in the 3rd. Maybe Sidney Crosby decided to be Andrei Kostitsyn for Halloween.

Moey said...

LG & GG,

Woo hoo, the power of three! Just caught the end of that first period, do we look as bad as it sounds? I'm taking one for the team tonight, sitting outside listening to the game on my laptop, getting eaten alive by mosquitos.

lawyergirl77 said...

Actually, I don't think that we're playing that badly. Shite luck again - the goal went off the urologist's skate.

We did squander our powerplays quite well, though. We're good at that. sigh.

GoldenGirl11 said...

@Moey
Mosquitoes? In October? And why do you have to go outside? MrMoey fall asleep on the remote again?

kevincrumbs said...

@Moey: I'm pretty sure there's some spray you could put on to stop from getting eaten alive by mosquitos.

Sonia said...

"so LGs the cook and I'm the pornographer, huh?"

Do the men do anything around here?

Number31 said...

Why o why was Bergeron on the PK? When your claim to fame is a hard shot and being a defensive liability... Coach Fail.

Moey said...

GG,

We're on vacation in the tropics, Mr. Moey is snoozing inside on the sofa while I sit outside with my feet wrapped in a towel listening to CJAD...I swear my feet are on fire..the sacrifices I make for the Habs. They better win this. Fucktards.

lawyergirl77 said...

@Sonia - do the men ever do anything except for eat and jack off?

(I keed, I keed... sorta)

lawyergirl77 said...

MOTHERFUCKER - another penalty??

moeman said...

@lg77, um, erm.

Moey said...

@KC,

Feet are sprayed, but they love me. What can I say.

kevincrumbs said...

@LG77: We also drink alcohol.

kevincrumbs said...

Cari the Fat Whale looks good tonight.

moeman said...

4 GG11's photoCHopping scrapbook

moeman said...

@kc, maybe TFS™ ate and jacked-off today.

Kmaxx said...

I'm streaming RDS from the UK - Fuck me if I've never heard the sound of the sticks and ice and louder - then again - it could be the meth...

Go Habs Go!

lawyergirl77 said...

You know, I'm beginning to see why the urologist was still unsigned. He often takes stoopid shots.

kevincrumbs said...

Fucking Cristo-wall.

HabsFan29 said...

we suck

lawyergirl77 said...

Fuckitty fuck fuck. 2-0

kevincrumbs said...

FUCK.

I don't think we deserve to be down two. God, I hate their fucking goal song.

lawyergirl77 said...

@29 - we suck on the road.

HabsFan29 said...

btw sorry i was away for a while. i was busy eating and masturbating

lawyergirl77 said...

Actually, 29, we suck collectively on the road.

Hall Gill, OTOH, sucks all the time.

lawyergirl77 said...

29 - heh. In your case, I would add "doing hits of meth" to your list. But that's just a sign of what kind of a complex & layered man you are!

lawyergirl77 said...

Okay, and now RDS has corrected me.

We suck on the road.
Hall Gill sucks all of the time.
And we suck hardest in the second period.

Moey said...

Okay, I can't see this but WTF is wrong with the D?

HabsFan29 said...

@Moey - everything

kevincrumbs said...

Our D sucks.

Moey said...

Mosquitoes have left, gone to sleep it off. Must be male.

moeman said...

@HF29, thnx for the tip ... and yes, my manly FHFguy break was fulfilling and delicious.

Tom said...

I didn't realize the Blackhawks logo was a bullseye, because the Habs shots are all hitting Huet in the chest.

And what's up with Kostitsyn? How many times can he get into the offensive zone, and overskate the puck, thereby losing it in the process, with no one on him?

HabsFan29 said...

w00t! hope!

kevincrumbs said...

Finally!

lawyergirl77 said...

THANK YOU SQUID!

GoldenGirl11 said...

@Moey
At least tomorrow you'll get up to the sun.

@LG
You forgot complain. Men love to complain. Just took time during the second - while the habs also took time to have a break - to beat the 5 of them... ok 4. I never beat children under 4.

kevincrumbs said...

Just don't give up the third goal before the end of the 2nd period.

kevincrumbs said...

Fucking Urologist.

moeman said...

@ FHF's spectacular gals, methinks y'all eat, complain and ...

HabsFan29 said...

GIDDYUP!!!

moeman said...

MOEmaN!

kevincrumbs said...

That sound I hear is Huet's confidence crumbling!

Moen!

HabsFan29 said...

you suck Christo

lawyergirl77 said...

AAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!! AWESOME!! GO MOEN GO!!!

Since when do we score in the 2nd period??

moeman said...

Time for Houde to go eat.

Time for some anti-CHamber to complain.

Time for Brunet to jack-off.

Number31 said...

Travis Touchdown delivers. I asked for him to score one of his backbreaking dirty goals and he did!

HabsFan29 said...

gimme a break

kevincrumbs said...

Fucking bullshit penalty.

kevincrumbs said...

CFW: One man PK machine.

HabsFan29 said...

nice kill. ride some momentum boys!

GoldenGirl11 said...

@Moe
The women do it all EXCEPT for complain.

Just as a complete aside, DrGG is doing some biblical reading with the upcoming bar mitzvah boy and the following passage came up:
For the LORD had fast closed up all the wombs of the house of Abimelech...
So basically god punished Abimelech by closing up all of the orifice in his home. Actually all of the orifice in his body and the body of everyone in his house That's an awesome punishment. A little duct tape and some crazy glue and anything's possible.

HabsFan29 said...

JESUS CHRIST

Moey said...

Just put Mr. Moey to bed...this rum licquor ain't so bad, and oh yeah, we're tied. I'm getting a wee bit drunk.

HabsFan29 said...

I'll take that make-up penalty thx

HabsFan29 said...

TFS wants to win this game more than anyone

HabsFan29 said...

and FUCK

/ my fault, jinxed it

GoldenGirl11 said...

RUN THAT FUCKING KANE OVER WITH A TAXI!!!

lawyergirl77 said...

fuck.

HabsFan29 said...

fuck fuck fuck

lawyergirl77 said...

Dammit.

But I'm happy we fought back...

moeman said...

CHoulda bagged a point.

Bring on da fucking leaf and that fucking Dou$harek.

kevincrumbs said...

Too many shots given up but I feel that we were better than Chicago from about the mid point of the second. They did much better tonight versus Chicago than they did versus the other good teams we've played so far, such as Vancouver or Pittsburgh.

Moey said...

Bastards. Those skeeter bites weren't worth it.

GoldenGirl11 said...

Seems like Price hasn't won since last December. That fucking All Star ballot box stuffing embarrassment was the turning point. Just look at where we were then. Won the conference, carbo nominated, won the all star nod fair and square and then poof. Landslide after that All Star (look at us we're 100 and raking in the cash on mega crap) break.

kevincrumbs said...

@GG11: I also hate the centennial.

Carey'll be fine. At least he looks good out there.