Sunday, March 08, 2009

I am not wasting one more minute of my weekend on this fucking team - Stars Game Preview and Open Thread

So in case you live under a rock (or in a place that doesn't have Daylight Savings Time), you know that we lost an hour this weekend springing the clocks forward. I'm saying that was the hour I would have spent writing something about this team of crap. This team of crap that after last night's games is a mere single point away from being out of a playoff spot.

So here's the deal, without wasting any time - Habs play in Dallas at 6 PM. Yes, SIX P.M. E.D.T. I don't know what the fuck that means either. Habs have won 2 of their last 14 road games. Defending Big D is a great source for Stars news. Bégin and Ribeiro. Ex-Cowboy Terrell Owens is going to rip the city of Buffalo apart. And that's all I've got to say.

Talk amongst yourselves.

73 comments:

Baroque said...

Go Habs Go!

Go Habs Go!

Go Habs Go!

Go Habs Go!

Go Habs Go!

That is five times because it is once for each goal that the Montreal Canadiens will score against the Stars. I'm calling a 6-2 win against Dallas!

(The sixth goal will be scored by Ribiero into his own net, causing Turco to become enraged and slice off his foot with his goalie stick at center ice.)

(For all the good my predictions ever come to. I'm trying to be less negative as a spring resolution, though.) :)

Moey said...

HF29.....chill out man. Read Red Fisher's article in yesterdays Gazette to get a little perspective and remember it's only a game, we just invest far too much emotion and value into it.

word verif - bermuff (I'm not going there).

Limerick Dude said...

MaxPac-Pleks-Kovy
BigTits-Saks-Tangy
TK-Laps-Higgins
Dags-Metro-Stewart

Dandy on D? Maybe.

Starting in Goal? I'm guessing Halak.

I like these changes. MaxPac can do the dirty work in front of the net.
Tits can be the go to guy for scoring.

edit: word veri = caryo. So maybe Price will start.

dani said...

This will be the funniest football season ever. I'm so excited. And if T.O. thinks he will rip us apart (I pity our QB.), he has a lot to learn about Bills fans...

kristin said...

Thank god I have to work tonight and won't have to see the game...

Gino Tomac said...

It took Carbo 66 fucking games to get the lines right, and to put El Dandy back on D.

Good for you Carbo, you cunt fucking cock fucker.

We're 1 point from being out of the playoffs. I hope your kids get the shit kicked out of them at school because of your awful coaching skills and shitty haircut.

Maybe tonight You won't have Metropolit lead our 5 on 3 fuckwad.

I hope Kovalev spent his "time-off" banging your wife while you were finishing your roadtrip.

HabsFan29 said...

@baroque - your image of Ribs losing a foot has my mood improving dramatically. thx

@moey - i was totally Zen yesterday!

@dani - i agree. the first tome T.O. dogs a route, it the fans at RWS are gonna massacre him

Rangers win today = Habs now in 7th

The Gate To The Groin For Yannick Bertrand said...

So this is weird.

I'm flipping back and forth from the Northern Iowa/Illinois State game (any chance this Osiris Eldrige kid skate?) and the Colorado/Chicago game (it's in HD. I'll watch anything in HD) and I'm gazing at the helmet of Peter Budaj when he turns around and I notice he has a huge, ripped-shirt Ned Flanders on the back of his helmet.

So naturally I rush here to ask you guys what you make of this and discuss Peter's various possible sexual preferences, and as the page loads I'm greated with the face of a Homer clock.

My life and FHF are moulding into one. This can't be healthy.

Oh and Price starts tonight, Dandy's out (*goes on as if everything is normal).

Bob Gainey said...

Forget it.

This isn't a team, and it doesn't have a captain, or a single player who gives a shit.

And next year will be a rebuilding year.

Shutdown said...

@Yanick Bertrand's Groin:

His nickname is Ned Flanders because he's extremely religious.

Wow. Word Verif is exactly how Jaro pronounces sadness: sednesse.

UKHab said...

So there I was all upset about my broadband connection going down when it's a very reasonable 10pm faceoff (no daylight saving here yet). Then I remembered the shower of shite that was the Atlanta game. My ISP is just saving me from myself!

Bob Gainey said...

I read an article today in which there was the sentence: "And with Robert Lang expected back for the second round of the playoffs anything will be possible".

HA HA HA.

(Pens beating Caps 3-1. Will leapfrog us if they win)

M said...

Dandy is out - wtf!

Word verification: Idono
As in, "Idono" -Carbo

The Gate To The Groin For Yannick Bertrand said...

@shutdown: well that's the least fun explanation we could've got

Anonymous said...

i am foreseeing another blow out

HabsFan29 said...

i wrote the fucking preview i still forgot about this stupid 6 PM start time

oooh Ribs misses an open net. hihglight of the game!

Pens won. Habs now in 8th! woohoo! John Tavares here we come

HabsFan29 said...

who is this Eriksson guy? 32 goals? wtf?

Q said...

I can't believe they didn't give Halak the start. He plays his ass off for us, steals a few games and still they go to Price because he didn't totally suck.

What more must Halak do to earn a start?

Rips it, scores! said...

8 mins in, 3 penalties taken. Way to go guys.


@UKHab: Whereabouts do you hail from? Paddy here.

Gino Tomac said...

I'm watching the Dallas feed.
Their announcers just said that the Stars look like they're playing a junior varsity team.

How did we get here?

HabsFan29 said...

@Q - be drafted fifth overall

pretty lame beginning to a pretty must-win road game

Moey said...

We've spent the majority of the first period in our zone and in the penalty box. God do they stink or what.

HabsFan29 said...

@Gino - the coach sucks and may have lost the room. our D is pathetic. our scorers haven't scored consistently all year. we've had goalie issues. Lang is out. Gainey didn't make a move at the deadline. the team plays with no effort. the team doesn't know how to skate anymore. did i mention the coach sucks?

that's how we got here

Rips it, scores! said...

PP for Montreal. Where the hell is Metropolit?!?

HabsFan29 said...

after the failed PP the Habs have dropped to 11th in the East standings

Gino Tomac said...

@29

Sounds like a familiar story, except this time the names aren't Poulin, Dykhuis, Petrov, Czerkawski, and Berezin.

Do we even have a shot on net yet?

Rips it, scores! said...

@Gino: Prior to the PP, they had 2 SOGs, both of them just dump ins on Turco. Don't know if the Habs had any shots on the PP.

HabsFan29 said...

@Gino - Mariusz Czerkawski!!! god that name brings back memories

hey look, emotion!

shut up Benoit

Gino Tomac said...

Stewart just became my favorite Hab.
Fuck the rest of them.
I'm paying for Stewart's lapdance tonight.

fezworth said...

@Gino - Agreed. But I bet the Dallas coaches would call that a great shift for Ott. 3 knockdowns and one drawn penalty. Not dropping his gloves was probably smart of him.

But still... I'm glad Stewart did what he did. "No. You can't run our guys an get away with it."

fezworth said...

Also.. my previous verification word was 'fache'. I think that about sums it up.

The current one is mychwase. I'm not sure what that sums up.

HabsFan29 said...

nice penalty to end the period. Habs now in 12th

fezworth said...

Good grief.. Koivu penalty at the buzzer? Wow. The collapse continues. Bring on Tavares!

HabScot said...

I wonder if we'll have a penalty called during the intermission too?

Moey said...

How are we starting in the second, 5 on 2?

fezworth said...

Maybe a delay of game after being 5 minutes late for the start of the 2nd period.

You know... I'm kinda terrified that we're going to pull another Leafs this season, and end up in ninth. No playoff revenue, no chance at a high pick. NHL limbo.

Gino Tomac said...

Seriously, what is Carbo saying to the team right now? Or is he too busy already preparing his post game statement.

God I hate him.
I hate the fact that he's not in the dressing room right and having every player sign a hockey stick right before he painfully inserts the butt end of it into is ass slowly, crying in pain and telling the team that they're all fucking him.

cottoneye said...

Worst. period. ever.

Gino Tomac said...

Dallas feed just said that we're starting the 2nd on the shitty side of a 5 on 3 for 2 minutes.

I'm gonna go lube up my hockey stick

UKHab said...

Maybe if Turco gets really bored he might give Higgy a chance to miss an empty net.

@Rips it, scores!: I'm in London.

melly said...

Did the players collectively decide to do whatever it takes to get Carbo fired?

Gino Tomac said...

I just came

fezworth said...

I'll take that.

Moey said...

At least Pleky and Price showed up.

word verif - coman, that's where the rest of the team are.

WTF...we scored???

HabsFan29 said...

Tits? A goal?

/has heart attack

UKHab said...

The empty net fell to Big Tits not Higgy. Thank god!

fezworth said...

My God... if the team played with 60% of Plecky's fire, we'd be well in charge of this game. It's like he actually wants to WIN!

HabsFan29 said...

a lead? i dont believe it

HabScot said...

Maybe someone should point out to Kovy that there's more chance of scoring when he shoots?

Moey said...

These lines are working better together. Carbo, please keep them together for the next friggin game.

HabScot said...

@fezworth

Maybe a Stewart-Plekanec-someone else who gives a shit line would be a good idea

UKHab said...

Good period. Any chance of two of those in a row do you think?

word verif:waxophs
ninja hockey time.

Gino Tomac said...

Another from the Dallas feed:
Interview with Ribiero between periods.

"After I left Montreal and came to Dallas, things just worked. There are better players here, it was just better."

I want to hate him. I want him to get hit by a fucking plane.

But Mickey fucking Ribs makes some sense right now.

Anonymous said...

This fucking bipolar, schizophrenic bunch of motherfuckers is going to drive me to an early fucking grave.

If they sit back on this lead and collapse into themselves like little bitches, I'm going to put Carbo into that early grave.

Moey said...

Thrashers beat the Flames 5-2?

HabsFan29 said...

i'll take it!!

HabScot said...

@UKHab

Maybe if Turco gets really bored he might give Higgy a chance to miss an empty net.

Except he didn't miss! You called it though

Q said...

What is it with American hockey fans desperate need to always bang on the fuckin glass?

UKHab said...

I really love Turco's wanderings.

Baroque said...

I've seen the glass-banging in other arenas (also Canadian) - I think it's just because when the fans get drunk they feel compelled to behave like animals in a zoo.

Go Habs Go!

Go Habs Go!

Go Habs Go!

I have a new idea for the NHL - any fan should be allowed to watch any game for free if, within five minutes of puck drop, they can name at least three players on each team playing in the game. Then we wouldn't have to hunt for internet feeds. :)

Gino Tomac said...

To quote my word verification on Price's sick glove save

"Colis"

Baroque said...

I hate Steve Ott. Reminds me of a guy I knew in high school.

word verif = "nombi"

HabsFan29 said...

we have a lead. im too nervous to watch. ive switched to curling

Baroque said...

Heh. I'm watching this on the computer and USA vs Venezuela baseball on television. :)

Gino Tomac said...

@29

You're missing out on the Habs actually looking interesting for the 1st time in months to watch lesbians (not the good kind) throw stones?

HabsFan29 said...

@Gino - i kid of course. and the lesbian curlers are done, we're on to the bald men

Baroque said...

Minute and a half. Come on, guys.

Gino Tomac said...

@29
Bald men that dress like lesbians (again, not the good kind)

HabsFan29 said...

wow, a W

Baroque said...

Whew.

Not 6-2, but 3-1 is fine with me. :)

Fifth place with that win? The Eastern conference is just as clustered as the West.

HabsFan29 said...

I can't update the "Habs Record" box fast enough

Gino Tomac said...

We won? Wait....WTF? We won?
Carey Price played superb? What?
Kovalev scored?...A goal? Huh?
Brisebois wasn't on the ice? At all?

What team is this?

Maybe Carbo's stick sodomizing thing during the 1st intermission worked?

Number31 said...

I love Stewart. Oh how I love Stewart. Sign the kid for life please.