Tuesday, March 31, 2009

The Game Day Skate jumps right to the chase and gives you your Blackhawks Game Preview and Open Thread

If we're gonna stare at the same hot chick all day, she might as well be really hot

Good morning sunshine! Hope that Marisa Miller's tits didn't throw you off your breakfast. Or maybe they just made you put more milk in your cereal. Anyhoo, we're trying something new today. After the glory (for me) that was the no effort game preview came to an unglorious end when six Habs couldn't score in a shootout, today we try something else to shake things up. Sure, some stuff happened in the NHL yesterday (most notably the Rangers shutting out the Devils) but you only really care about one team anyway, right?

Anyone look at a schedule lately? The season ends NEXT FUCKING WEEKEND. There are only SEVEN FUCKING GAMES LEFT. Jebus. I thought there was still plenty of time to get things really going, but it's time to get serious, isn't it? No more dicking around, you Fucking Habs. I really don't feel like having to watch baseball in April. I hate fucking baseball. So please, let's win some games and make my life bearable. As no Game Day Skate is complete without some bullet points, let's use 'em to set up tonight's action:
  • 7:30 PM start at the phone Booth, and it's on TSN;
  • Habs did take 5 of 6 points last week, I guess that's something;
  • Before getting shutout by Roberto Luongo, the Hawks had won 3 in a row, and they are solidly battling for 4th in the West;
  • This is the teams' only meeting this season;
  • The Fifth Feather seems like a decent place;
  • Tangy (on a five-game points streak), Kovy, and Markov are your hot Habs. And Higgy seems to be reborn on the fourth line and the PK;
  • Martin Havlat has 9 points in his last 5 games. I'm sure I don't have to tell you to watch Jonathan Toews;
  • Oh ZombiePleks, why have you returned?
  • Habs look to get Big Tits back in the lineup, but it's still not set yet. I also don't know who's starting in nets. Who knew you can't get good game notes at 6 in the morning? This idea may have its flaws, I admit;
  • HueT will get the start after sitting for six straight. I don't like the sound of that. Will he be booed?
  • For your post-game adult entertainment, please enjoy this Marisa Miller swimsuit shoot video. Choice quote: "let's just get them wet and make them look beautiful on the beach."
Make your comments entertaining, we've got all day here...

84 comments:

Anonymous said...

Think you guys are great. I absolutely agree that the booing of former Habs visiting is pretty shallow and lame. This has got to stop... We Hab fans are finally contributing with our own stupidity to making sure that we don't attract "any" free agents to our city... Bravo Habs fans!!! Let's go for another ten years of mediocrity why not!!

PS. I always assumed that the "Ole" song was more of a "away"(sp? French for "C'mon" chant), I guess I'm mistaken.

Limerick Dude said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Limerick Dude said...

I think Boone mentioned the Habs are wearing those awful fucking striped PJ's tonight! Please tell me this isn't so. Not only are they butt ugly, but I get a headache watching them buzz around my TV. And not to mention the bad karma - we lost Lang last time they wore them.

Sonia said...

And not to mention the bad karma - we lost Lang last time they wore them.

And Tender. And the game.

lawyergirl77 said...

The Habs are definitely wearing the prison uniforms tonight.

Fuck.

James said...

Just for statistics sake, the Habs are 1-6 this year when wearing the retro jerseys, the only win being a 6-2 thumping of the Rangers in the first couple months of the season.

All other games wearing any retro jerseys have been met with varying degrees of suckiness and fucktardiness from our Glorieux.

Way to remember your history, Fucking Habs.

Limerick Dude said...

Wow, they've worn retro jerseys 7 times?! I only recall two games with the CA and one with the prison unis...guess they were mostly forgettable games.

Anonymous said...

Price gets the start.

Habsfan10 said...

If the Habs had worn the white 1946throwbacks and the Hawks had their regular reds, this game would be the best looking hockey game (from a uniform perspective) ever. I love the Hawks reds.

HabsFan29 said...

fuck fuck fuck. i mention Higgy in the preview and now he's got the fucking flu. can we go one fucking game without missing a player due to the fucking flu??? FUCK

Habsfan10 said...

Could you mention Breezer and Laraque? Repeatedly?

Boob Gainey said...

Do we already have the French Canadian impact player?

Alex Tanguay was drafted the same year as Vincent Lecavalier (1998, great year for Quebec players - Simon Gagné, Brad Richards, Mike Ribeiro, Francois Beauchemin) and has more points per game:

VL: 0.85 ppg
AT: 0.88 ppg

James said...

Boob, you are the voice of wisdom. The best part of it is, Tangs wants to play here and can be had for around 5M.

word verif: aaflerfu

That's the latin name for the flu virus hitting the team.

Habsfan10 said...

Boob, my East coast roots compels me to note Brad Richards is from Murray Harbour, PEI.

Want to be sick to your stomach? In 1998, Reggie took Eric Fucking Chouinard over Simon Gagne.

Limerick Dude said...

@10: I just barfed in my mouth a little. I play that 'what if' game on occasion and look at the drafts of the past. It makes me sad.

@BOOB: That's an interesting stat that I wouldn't have guessed. A quick check shows Tangs with a far superior +/- too, though much of that can be attributed to playing in front of a certain P. Roy.

HA! My word is vomiest...barf reference.

hockeyzombie said...

The Habs looked pretty badass back in 1912 when they wore those jerseys.

Game 1 of the 7 games series starts tionight.

GO HABS!

eyebleaf said...

That picture is a great one. Merci beaucoup, as always.

South Shore Hab said...

This just in - no barbershop uniforms.

THANK YOU, BOB!

(still SSHF here - I realized having "Habs Fan" at the end of my name might be confusing)

Jaybird said...

Why aren't we wearing any other of the jerseys we unveiled at the start of the season?

I don't mind the candy canes! I do know from memory we have shit the bed every time we have worn retro shit this year. Hope fully tonight we don't stink like an old lady farted piss. LOL

Word Verif: rherse
Like the speech Bob Gainey will have to rehearse if we don't make the playoffs. Fuck it I love you Bob.

Limerick Dude said...

SSH: Thank you for that info!

From my babelfish translator, sounds like they'll wear the CA instead?

In addition, contrary to what was envisaged, the Canadian will not play with the striped uniform of the season 1912-1913. Bob Gainey warned the department of marketing which its club will play with a more sober uniform. The pullover of the season 1915-1916 will be thus of setting this evening. It s' acts of the same pullover as at the time of the recent match against Toronto.

James said...

LD- that sounds about right. And it's a good call by Bob. Picking the best looking retro jersey (solely because I own one) over the worst looking one. Bob might just have saved the season, right there.

lawyergirl77 said...

Thank you Bob!!! That bit of news makes me so happy, it's ridiculous... Plus I own the jersey they will be wearing, so double yay.

Kudos to Bob to standing up to the marketing department. Here's hoping that they players reward his effort by playing a solid 60 minutes tonight.

If it does, then maybe he could start threatening them with the barbershop uniforms the next game if they play like shit. Might be the kind of incentive they need...

moeman said...

Now this is a fucking line-up.

Go Habs!

HabsFan29 said...

moeman, that is an outstanding lineup. maybe the best of all time

moeman said...

Maybe we should be typing ficker instead of fucker tonight. Pre-April Fools jokes aside, you MS Win weenies can get help here;

http://www.mcafee.com/us/threat_center/conficker.html ( upper right corner for the .exe )

Us fucking Mac users can drink beer and sing Olé.

South Shore Hab said...

You know it's late March when teams hang their playoff hopes on what jerseys the teams are wearing.

@ moeman
Until the other computers at work/school refuse to communicate with our Macs, because neither the people who wrote the instructions nor tech support anticipated that someone might actually own an Apple.

moeman said...

Word Verif = bootin

Limerick Dude said...

5-3 habs

moeman said...

Good news = Higgs!

Bad news = benoit 'convaincul' brunet is questioning himself, again.

Moey said...

I rarely go to Habs games but lucky me, I was at that Boston game with those horrible jerseys, Lang got injured, we lost and then went into that terrible tailspin. Crap, I may be the jinx that started it all.

Baroque said...

Wow, I don't have to hunt for an internet feed - this is the game on versus (although versus sucks so bad, I may wear out the mute button).


Go Habs Go! :)

word verif = cycad. Holy crap, it's a real word! Maybe that's good luck.

Baroque said...

Well, Kovalev is certainly awake. :)

Boob Gainey said...

Duncan Keith.

I don't think so ...

Baroque said...

Uh-oh.

Nice to see the Tits stick up for each other.

South Shore Hab said...

It wasn't really a dirty hit - comparable to the Lapierre hit, I'd say.

Except that Lapierre got penalized for his. 4, 5, and 10 for sticking up for your teammate after he's hit from behind? Riiiiiight.

Jaybird said...

Good first period!

I hate how many were missing lately though! Should be 2 zip at least. Price is back baby WOOT WOOT

Bod said...

LE FUCKING BUUUUUUUT!!!!

Baroque said...

Goal for Latendresse.

Nice to have a two goal lead - but if they sit on it ... I have a restocked kitten supply for punting. :)



(Just kidding, of course - I love real animals, probably more than people. I only abuse imaginary animals.)

HabsFan29 said...

just walked in. Gui!!!!

HabsFan29 said...

just checked the box score. Big Tits with 17 mins of penalties?? WTF???

South Shore Hab said...

HF29

Johnson rides Sergei head-first into the boards. Andrei grabs him and fights him, though he got the worst of it.

Refs call everything in the book on Andrei. No call on the original hit.

Baroque said...

The younger Kostitsyn brother was hit from behind, and big brother stuck up for him.

Not the hardest hit, or especially dirty, but any older sibling will tell you that NO ONE ELSE IS PERMITTED to beat up on the younger sibling.

HabsFan29 said...

i like Tits supporting each other

South Shore Hab said...

Hamrlik goes to the room, looks like his head hurts.


This season is cursed.

moeman said...

Cross your heart hf29?

HabsFan29 said...

Fucking Panthers won't go away. 3-1

HabsFan29 said...

w00t!

Baroque said...

Even better than a two-goal lead is a three-goal lead. They better not sit back in the third period.

i like Tits supporting each other

They have to - otherwise a lady would be lopsided, and that is just uncomfortable. :)

moeman said...

hf29 has uplifting comments.

moeman said...

Sometimes less support can be good.

boob gainey said...

I like the Tits supporting each other too.

But I would like the league to act on hits to the head. I want to see a player hit the league with a lawsuit.

Baroque said...

@ moeman -

Not when you have underwire issues right before a meeting. You can trust me on this one. :)

Moey said...

@Baroque,

That's why that big tits lil tits line ain't working, it's lopsided.
Sergei needs a boob job.

lawyergirl77 said...

The fact that big tits stood up for little tits makes me so very happy. 19 minutes in penalties is totally unjustified though.

Is it wrong that I'm kind of relieved that Hamr got injured? He's been crap lately.

Keep it up for another 20 minutes, boys! Get inspiration from the Tits!!!

Baroque said...

@ Moey -

No time for the recovery time. Stuffing with tissues works a lot faster!

South Shore Hab said...

lg77 - Having O'Byrne, Schneider, and Brisebois all playing in the same game might be tempting fate a little too much.

Appropriate that he goes out while taking an interference penalty, though.

Wish I had a witty titty-talk comment, but you guys are on a roll, and I can't mess with a streak.

Moey said...

@Baroque,

Yup, stuff the old "training bra" as they called it back in my day, the question is what were they being trained for?

Baroque said...

...the question is what were they being trained for?

Sit up and beg? ;)

moeman said...

This blog is lickable.

Moey said...

@ Baroque,

Sitting up is always good, lying down and rolling over is a chick's worst nightmare.

HabsFan29 said...

This blog is lickable

a new tagline if i ever heard one

Baroque said...

@ Moey -

I concur. Gravity and time take a cruel, cruel toll.

Baroque said...

Poop. So much for the shutout.

Figures it would be Patrick Sharp. Nice, nice player - they missed him a ton while he was injured.

boob gainey said...

These refs are atrocious.

moeman said...

@tissuedBaroque, you can always teach the old dogs new tricks.

Baroque said...

@ moeman -

No tissue required. (That's why I am highly familiar with underwires - I need them.)

Unfortunately, in bras as in shoes, there is no point trying to go with a cheap item and dealing with discomfort as a result of lack of proper support. Sometimes you really do get what you pay for.

HabsFan29 said...

Habs currently in 9th btw

Fear the collapse people!!!

man that was some close Tits

HabsFan29 said...

w00t!

moeman said...

Nice.

Baroque said...

Yay, another goal!

Virtual kittens remain untouched. :)

(At least so far.)

moeman said...

@Baroque, merci, beaucoup pour ta très belle description.

HabsFan29 said...

too bad about the shutout but it's a good two points

HabsFan29 said...

whew back in 8th

boob gainey said...

Final record versus the West:

13-4-1

Not bad.

moeman said...

Nice gesture by TFS™.

Baroque said...

Winning is so much better than gagging away a lead in the third period. I'd like more of that, please, Montreal.

Baroque said...

G'night, everyone. Pleasant dreams! :)

South Shore Hab said...

The Habs make me happy.

I haven't felt this way since October.

Jaybird said...

Huge win tonight! C'mere Rangers you little bitches HAHAHA

I can see Montreal and Florida passing NYR.

That Chicago goal KILLED my shutout and Kovalev game winner ugh. Big money involved but I would pay it all for a Habs victory anyways.

GO HABS GO!

Jaybird said...

* for fantasy pool, I means

Word verif: Unfolds (I kid you not!) how appropriate.

South Shore Hab said...

I hope so. I hate the Rangers.

Though I'd prefer that they get in, rather than Philly... but you can't always get what you want.

Shutdown said...

Go Habs.
Go Beer.
Go 2.50$ Jack Daniels shots at some bar on Crescent.

Go Micro-Econ Class tomorrow morning.

South Shore Hab said...

$2.50 for shots?

Name of bar, please!

Anonymous said...

Marisa Miller's my wet dream, you fuckers. Thanks so much for posting yet another great looking chick.

Go Habs! Go you fucking Habs!