Saturday, December 12, 2009

Stripped Down Habs hit Hotlanta to face the Thrashers

the only reason I ever wanted to be a pro athlete was to get VIP treatment at a strip clubFresh off a loss to the defending champs, the Canadiens travel South of the Mason-Dixon line for a scrap with Ilya Kovalchuk and the free-scoring Thrash. Will it be a Patrick Ewing style Gold Club happy ending, or a Gold Club trial-type fiasco? Find out tonight!

Standing in line watching Ewing and the rest of the Knicks get waved right in: 7:00 pm at the Phillips Arena in Hotlanta, on RDS and the currently free Centre Ice. Habs coming off the loss to the other birds from Pittsburgh, Thrashers coming home after a dismal 1-3 road trip.

Hotter than Atlanta after Sherman paid a visit on his way to the coast: Price lost last game but he's wearing his TFS mantle again: 2-1-0, 1.68, .947 in his last three. Pleks and Cammi scoring and is that a warmed up Big Tits? Yessir, it might be. For Atlanta, Ilya Kovalchuk is hot now but is going to be mid-August at Turner Field hot as a free agent if he doesn't sign an extension soon, Rich Peverley leads Atlanta in scoring, and Maxim Afiniganov has found a new lease on life. Must be a mint julep fan.

Less action than an engineer at Georgia Tech: Bryan Little was probably pencilled in as Kovalchuk's centre pre-season and is struggling with 3 goals on the season. Sophomore goalie Ondrei Pavelec has discovered the proverbial slump, and is 0-2 with a 5.44 goals against and .850 save percentage in his last two starts. For the Habs, Little Tits has cooled down after returning to the big club with something to prove, and while Travis Moen is still giving his 110%, he's pointless in 6.

Busted like a cocaine orgy at the late, lamented Gold Club: Gionta and Markov are inching ever closer but are still out. Paul Mara didn't make the trip, and Jaro 2.0 is hobbling and needs a break. The Thrash is without supposed franchise goalie Kari Lehtonen, whose back finally gave out after carrying the franchise's expectations since he went 2nd overall in the 2002 draft ahead of Jay Bouwmeester.

Your hook-up to the raging nightlife in Buckhead: Check out Bird Watchers Anonymous for your Atlanta Thrashers news and views.

Post Game Entertainment: Has Patrick Ewing taught you nothing? If that ain't your thing, Atlanta is a Southern town full of hot Southern Belles. For the ladies, if the men of Georgia Tech can pull themselves away from their home-made robots and Star Wars Monopoly, you've got yourself the ultimate in nerd chic for the evening.

98 comments:

offspace said...

GO PANTS!!!

vw: paingly

offspace said...

GO PANTS!!!

vw: paingly

moeman said...

If one doesn't click2zoom on GG's gameday pic one might think it reads Dirty Butts. GorGeous font.

~~~

WV = corntape, as in make your own corntape joke

moeman said...

I'm a Habeliever
The Monkees or SmashMouth version, take your pick

I thought CH love was
Only true in Bob's tales
Meant for someone else
Not for post-93 me

Second century CH Love gonna get me
That's the way it seems
Disappointment once haunted
All my 25th Stanley Cup dreams

And then I saw Squid play
Now I'm a Habeliever
Not a trace
Of doubt in my mind
I'm in CH love
I'm a Habeliever
I couldn't leave Plex
If I tried

I thought CH love was
More or less a given thing
The more I gave the less
I got, WTF no pants
What's the use fucking trying
All you get is pain
When I wanted Na Na Heh Heh
I got Olé, Olé, Olé

And then I saw Price play
Now I'm a Habeliever
Not a trace
Of doubt in my mind
I'm in CH love
I'm a Habeliever
I couldn't leave Hamr
If I tried

What's the use fucking trying
All you get is pain
When I wanted Na Na Heh Heh
I got Olé, Olé, Olé

And then I saw Josh play
Now I'm a Habeliever
Not a trace
Of doubt in my mind
I'm in CH love
I'm a Habeliever
I couldn't leave Tits
If I tried

Then I saw Pax play
Now I'm a Habeliever
Not a trace
Of doubt in my mind

Now I'm a Habeliever
Yeah, yeah, yeah
Yeah, yeah, yeah
I'm a Habeliever

Then I saw Vodkov skate!
I'm a Habeliever
Not a trace
Of doubt in my mind
I'm a Habeliever

HabsFan29 said...

killer as always moeman! i love that you have links in there now.

goddamn all i ever wanted from life was 15 minutes in the Gold Club VIP room. it was my life long dream, now it'll never happen.

moeman said...

Thnx HF29, some gURLS are just too good to not link.

HabsFan29 said...

that link was quite educational

"some gURLS" is one of my top 5 Stones albums of all time

moeman said...

It'll be parodied soon...

~~~

Also, I agree about being educated, and its an added bonus we get here at FHF. The study might also explain why gals live longer than us guys, seeing (pun intended) that they get an eyeful 100% of the time.

kevincrumbs said...

@moeman: Now I'll have that song stuck in my head all day.

BTW, hello from across the Pacific. Eagerly awaiting puck drop as I've been up since five am due to jet lag.

I swear if Pavelec stands on his head one more time against us while he completely bombs against other teams then I'll... uh... be very unhappy and complain on the internet.

gillis said...

according to moeman's link, i did 5 hours of aerobics in my humanities class the other day

Number31 said...

Trapped at a joke of a bar mitzvah in Toronto. Never in my life have I been to a bar mitzvah where they don't at least give you a meal... But I got my cousin a Price jersey. He'll be the coolest kid in town. And what better way to become a man than with the glorious red sweater.

Apparently the Moose is starting tonight. I think the Habs can take him. Well, so long as Chris Fucking Lee is far far away.

moeman said...

Hope you get an A+ gillis.

Moey said...

Are we talkin' about Patrick Ewing of "Dallas" fame? I'm confused, as usual.

moeman said...

@N31, never good to be Trapped in Toronto. Hope you can catCH some Habs news in betwixt ron and don (sadly it might come from P. J. Stuck).

Maybe skip out for a quick bite, oh wait, its Toronto, no Schwartz, no Bar-B-Barn, no Kojax, not even a decent bagel.

Moey said...

Okay, sorted. Patrick Duffy played Bobby Ewing on Dallas. I crack myself up. No connection, nothing to do with Atlanta. Jesus, I need a drink.

moeman said...

@Moey, not that Patrick Ewing, this notorious one;

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Patrick_Ewing

http://archives.cnn.com/2001/LAW/07/23/gold.club.trial/index.html

Moey said...

Thx moeman. I thought HF10 was on meth or somethin'. Turns out I probably should be on it.

HabsFan29 said...

mmm, how about some Pam Ewing

moeman said...

@HF29, thanks for adding a few days to my life!

Habsfan10 said...

@ moeman:

Toronto has two St Urbain bagel shops now, and I can attest that they taste almost like the real thing. Plus Kaplansky's deli is serving some kickass smoked meat. We're covered in TO foodwise.

moeman said...

Thnx for the knowledgeable update HF10.

I was just being a sarcasstic ass but I was/always will take shots at the CotU. Its easy and fun. Go Habs!

HabsFan29 said...

as a frequent visitor to the 416, i can attest the sheer number of ex-Montrealers over there is improving the food selection dramatically

not to mention Steam Whistle. don't get me started on Ontario beer selection vs. Quebec

moeman said...

Whilst watching pre-game cbc/hnic (I know, its like enjoying David Cronenberg's Crash), I made a new word, bukkakessel.

HabsFan29 said...

this week McSplooge will bukkakessel all over a TSN broadcast

moeman said...

Good one HF29.

One of my good web buds coined kessposito, that is Roundtine-ish fucking gold.

In my younger days and whilst CCRyder was a Hab, I once tried coining Marble-Ryder. It went over everyone's head.

HabsFan29 said...

+1 for MarbleRyder moe. it's not over MY head

George was caught trying to sneak a MarbleRyder into the Ross's house

moeman said...

Also genius,

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Cheever_Letters

NTTIAWWT

HabsFan29 said...

is the Habs game like the 4th CBC game? who does play by play? cassie campbell?

kevincrumbs said...

Anyone else watching the RDS feed on Justin.tv having issues?

moeman said...

That is a good Q HF29.

I'd take Cassie for some playBYplay. It could be worse, it could be benoit brunet, surprisingly not working at cbc/hnic.

HabsFan29 said...

sorry kevin i'm watching real TV. i am jealous though if you're in Asia and having my favourite Asian beverage, Pocari Sweat and vodka

moeman said...

@kc, when I have issues, I call my Mom.

HabsFan29 said...

nice French anthem, Jennifer Hanson, whoever you are

HabsFan29 said...

also, nice red dress, Jennifer Hanson, whoever you are

Ronan said...

Gotta admit, that's pretty classy of Atlanta/anthem singer. Practicing for when they relocate to Quebec City?

HabsFan29 said...

aww, Bob Cole wished me Happy Hanukkah!

moeman said...

@HF29, http://www.jenniferhansonmusic.com

A peaCH.

moeman said...

Happy Hanukkah to all FHFers that celebrate Hanukkah.

HabsFan29 said...

Metro!

moeman said...

Métro!

moeman said...

Beer me you Bastage!

HabsFan29 said...

i only get the Coke moeman because you took the time to put the accent in there

kevincrumbs said...

Metro!

RDS feed working well. Turns out it was just fucked up during the pregame, so I got to miss Joel Bouchard spouting off. Probably a blessing in disguise.

@HF29: Pocari Sweat and vodka? I'll have to try it.

moeman said...

@kc, you missed bouCHard's nice hair (and little else).

@HFvingt-neuf, methinks BR would sue you for missing the accent aigu.

HabsFan29 said...

@kevin - Pocari Sweat is a miracle beverage. mixes with anything. i love that stuff. found it in Montreal for $6 for a 1.5 litre. i happily pay it

kevincrumbs said...

Wow, we're getting calls now? Must be the league trying to make up for the Pittsburgh game.

moeman said...

ATL must be wondering WhereTheFuck is Chris Lee.

Also, Caps R busting one in the leaf ass, cbc/hnic'ers night is done early?

HabsFan29 said...

i like the way Carbo says "Trashers"

moeman said...

@kc, dark English beer me.

HabsFan29 said...

bob cole still rules with the "oh baby"

HabsFan29 said...

more WWF than UFC

moeman said...

Only have rds feed here but bobcole's only affinity with 'oh baby' is the fact he wears a diaper. His leaf splooging and denigration of every other team's players puts him in the sick bin.

HabsFan29 said...

*sorry, WWE now

kevincrumbs said...

BGL fighting... how exciting.

@moeman: In a land with minimal dark beer, although I'm surprised at the quality of some of the beer that can be found if you look hard enough.

moeman said...

@kc, what land are you in my friend?

boob gainey said...

Laraque is providing the answer to the question: does veganism make it harder to fight?

The answer is yes.

He hasn't won one this year.

boob gainey said...

Bergeron is in Father Christmas mode.

kevincrumbs said...

@moeman: Taiwan until the 2nd.

@boob: I think the Urologist misses being criticized on here. Man, I haven't ripped into him or Hal Gill in ages. This is a good thing, I think.

kevincrumbs said...

One too many passes on the three on one?

moeman said...

@kc, hope the weather is nice where you are.

The Urologist will free ride it until Vodkov takes his natural position on D and on the PK. FWIW, MAB has done very well and a PP unit with the two yo-yo'ing the puck before the big shot is something to look forward to.

moeman said...

Would it kill them to zoom in with the camera?

moeman said...

Codorníu's latest fermented batch is nice.

Ronan said...

Man, the camerawork is going to make me seasick - I've barely seen the puck all period.

moeman said...

Decent 1st.

More than 1 SOG.

Some decompressed zip.

Bonus, cleanup in aisle Métro.

Come on you fucking Habs, Go.

Culottes!

moeman said...

SK74 needs to let his inner tit fucking fly. Score small tit, score.

moeman said...

ATL Coach Anderson to some goatee'd assistant "did you see that cute little ice gal?'

HabsFan29 said...

ALL TITS BABY!!!!

moeman said...

Tits that are big (are good for your longevity)!

kevincrumbs said...

Completely missed the goal and the replay but I like AK's hustle.

@moeman: Weather here is fantastic, not too hot a hint of a breeze. Beats the high of 26F or whatever the hell I was dealing with in Portland before leaving.

HabsFan29 said...

ive rewound that goal 5 times. seriously, that's a lot of Tits

moeman said...

TFS™ is Olympian.

HabsFan29 said...

crap

moeman said...

Or not.

moeman said...

Oooh, so close to a beer.

HabsFan29 said...

double crap

moeman said...

ugh

moeman said...

Boobs!

HabsFan29 said...

so much TITS in this game

moeman said...

Crap.

HabsFan29 said...

i cant enjoy myself for 2 minutes

moeman said...

Outshot 25-14, eeeeeeeeghad!

gillis said...

What is that now? 31 straight penalties killed? 31 times 2 = 62 minutes. That's like playing a full game on the penalty kill and getting a shutout. How bout the habs get a quick lead, then take a bunch of penalties, they dn't let in as many goals that way

boob gainey said...

Is someone going to start criticizing the Canadiens coaching?

The headless chicken play in our end, the periods in which we get completely dominated, the penalties.

This is bad coaching.

moeman said...

Some good points boob.

At least the PK is killer.

HabsFan29 said...

LIFT THE PUCK, FUCK

moeman said...

Small tits needs an implant?

lehab said...

looking like we're going to need a bra-trick by big tits to win this game!

boob gainey said...

Laps fights like a little bitch.

moeman said...

ATL should fear the unclasp.

chris nilan said...

can we nickname maxime "turtle"laps?

moeman said...

... or turtle waxed ...

HabsFan29 said...

hey hey, any mention of turtling brings to mind the little fuckity-fuck. we can't have that

HabsFan29 said...

TFS!!!!!

HabsFan29 said...

Habs need some Red Bull

HabsFan29 said...

i think we'll take that point

HabsFan29 said...

blech

moeman said...

Ugly loss.

Shoot, more, fuckers.

boob gainey said...

I think we have to accept that this is a very bad team with outstanding goal keeping.

Three posts and three gems by Price. Could have been 6-3.