Wednesday, April 13, 2011

The Boston Globe editorial staff previews the epic hockey series that is Habs-Bs


TWO AND NINE? Can you believe that? The Sox have gone 2-9 to start the season. This may be the most disappointing season in the history of this glorious franchise. This is a disaster. We need to get rid of Tito immediately. There is no doubt he has lost the players in the clubhouse. How else can you explain this epic failure? Sox Nation will not stand for a loser. We once waited 86 years to win a World Series; we will not wait more than five years to win again. Drastic action is needed immediately. The season can still hopefully be saved. The most storied franchise in the history of baseball will not be denied.

Goodness what is wrong with the Celtics. They have fallen all the way to third in the Eastern Conference. This is completely unacceptable heading into the playoffs. This team has just collapsed since the Kendrick Perkins trade. It ruined everything. We even lost to Miami the other day! This team is critically struggling. It's been a whole three years since this team won a championship, and we can wait no longer. Drastic action is needed immediately. Danny Ainge was responsible for the Perkins deal; clearly, he must be fired. The season can still hopefully be saved. The most storied franchise in the history of basketball will not be denied.

On the plus side, only three months until the Patriots report to training camp! We here at the Globe are extremely optimistic about the coming season. Yes, last year's disappointing loss to the Jets in the playoffs still stings, but unquestionably Jets' coach / foot fetishist Rex Ryan must have cheated. Our coaching staff would never do that; Rex Ryan makes us sick. But it's time to look forward not back, and Tom Brady will undoubtedly once again lead us to the Promised Land. It's been a whole seven years since the Pats found Super Bowl glory; there is no doubt that epic drought will end this year. The most storied franchise in the history of football will not be denied.

The sporting event that we here at the Globe are most looking forward to however is the Boston Marathon this coming Monday. So many interesting story lines this year. Can Cheruiyot win his sixth race in the past nine years? And the emotional return of Marathon legend Joan Benoit Samuelson has touched a resonant chord in all of us. But once again, it will be the stories of the lesser known runners, and the sight of 25,000 marathoners lining up to start that will make the Marathon the wonderful spectacle it's been for over a century. The most storied race in the history of running will not be denied.

Bruins-Canadiens Eastern Conference quarter-final starts tomorrow night at 7 PM at the TD Garden

38 comments:

Cornelius Hardenbergh said...

When you're the only team in town not to win at least one championship in the last decade, you get...bumped.

Whatever. GO BRUINS!

Habsfan10 said...

What the hell ... no mention of the mighty New England Revolution?!!?! GO REVS!!!

moeman said...

Um, what about The Fighting Irish?

Alan said...

Really we can't mock the Boston for having high caliber sports teams. Not a battle we are going to win. We might have the best team in hockey but they got us beat in everything else. And what happens if the Bruins win? Their fourth overall franchise beat our one and only??? You can't compare the dedication of the Habs fans to Boston because they will never know that feeling and this series will never mean as much to them as it does to us. If you are mocking boston for not supporting the bruins you are doing it wrong since they have teams like the red sox and patriots that have more fans world wide than the Canadiens do.

moeman said...

BTW, 29, that post stung a bit as my Mémère was born in Massachusetts. I'll get over it.

Anonymous said...

Your fucking sick, my Android has a mind of its own and it may assimilation you. I dont believe you even work for the Boston Globe.

You hate baseball and basketball, I can tell.

You probably done even own a decent pair of running shoes.

You just want to fuck Brady's wife you sick fuck.

kevincrumbs said...

I'm really thrilled by the Red Sox's start to the year. It has me more interested in baseball than the crappy way the Seattle Mariners have started off, although they've won two straight now!

Came here to complain about the idiocy of all those experts and their playoff predictions. Not because they didn't pick the Habs but because no one goes out on the limb and picks any upsets at all. What a fucking waste of space.

soperman said...

and this is Boston - they won a cup back in the 70's. Imagine the coverage the Coyotes get!

Dainers Hubris said...

WV: Wasn't going to write anything until I saw the WV, and it occurred to me that if that filter-less twit Marchand were to get *subent* around a stanchion, I probably wouldn't clap politely - or at all - when the medical staff finally peeled him off the ice.

soperman said...

@ DH

I wouldn't want Marchand to actually get seriously hurt, I do like some of his uncles.

Anonymous said...

bruins win in 1, habs forfeit after thurs. game...hopefully after a check from chara on a hab there is no embelishment needed and a career is truly over.the lunatics of montreal will flood 911 with calls about a play and the rest of the world will get a good laugh about them crying to the police that one of their players got hurt, instead of taking care of it on the ice like any other team in the league would do...a junior team could outmuscle the habs

Steven Ryan said...

hahahaha what a horrible attempt at trolling... Anybody think the Rangers have a chance against the Caps?

Cornelius Hardenbergh said...

@HF10

There is Revs coverage (behind the Bruins' coverage) but they're not the Twellman-led juggernaut of years past. Sure we've got Joseph and all but....yeah.

@Moeman

Shawn Thornton is covered with the rest of the Bruins.

Chester said...

They don't write about the Beaners due to the intelligence level of their average fan. Not big readers shall we say ...

soperman said...

@ chester

This would be an actual good application of Stan Lee's horrible comic book characters. Surely the beaners could understand a comic book. If they couldn't read the words, they could look at the pictures.

Habsfan10 said...

@ Cornelius:

As long as they still have those dudes firing off the muskets after goals, the Revs are okay in my book. Beats the hell out of watching TFC schelp around BMO Field for 90+ minutes to a steady chorus of cheers for Danny Dichio.

FYI, Montreal's getting an MLS franchise in 2012, so get your hatred ratcheted up.

Dainers Hubris said...

@ sopes: I know, I'm terrible. The kicker is that I had a very nice hash buzz going on at the time, so I should have had warm fuzzy thoughts. I hope this doesn't mean I'll get reincarnated as something truly terrible, like a mayfly or a Bruins fan.

Habsfan10 said...

@ Alan:

There's no way the Pats have more fans than the Canadiens. For forty years pre-Brady/Belichek they were nothing but an afterthought most of the time. And the Red Sox couldn't sell out Fenway for upwards of sixty years ... they might be more popular now if you're counting all the pink hat wearing girls who jumped on the bandwagon around 2004. No one doubts the passion of the Cornelius's of the world - maybe we question their sanity - but it is pretty funny that the Bruins get treated like lower caste garbage by their own local media, who are more concerned with Tom and Gisele's new pomeranian than anything Chara et al do.

soperman said...

@ DH

I wouldn't worry about it, the little shit brings it on himself. He was a Halifax Moosehead and is very unpopular with many Moosehead fans. That is very difficult, Moosehead fans still think Jakub Voracek is the second coming of Gretzky. Only slightly less popular than Sidney Crosby ("practically a Moosehead" :o) )

Serge129 said...

I've picked a team in the TSN (powered by ESPN) playoff pool, and joining Bruins pools and posting GYFHG!!! No bites yet.

word verif: uperse. as in up ur's Recchi!

Anonymous said...

I think everyone is completely shocked. I don't get a sense of anger as much as, "What in the world is going on here?" I liken it to what's going through Albert Pujols' mind when he's hitting about .170 right now [.200/.260/.267], going, "This is impossible." A lot of weird things have happened.
Gammons also thought the Red Sox might attempt to call off tonight's game because of the expected rain, as well as for a day off. "A couple of days of breathers wouldn't be a bad thing at this point."

However, the opposite point -- sitting around and stewing for another 24 hours about getting off to the worst start in franchise history* before playing again probably isn't a good idea, either -- is equally valid.

* Worst start after 11 games, that is, tied with 1925, 1927, and 1996.

Bill 10-4 said...

I would like to retract a previous comment about 'previews' not being interesting or worthwhile.

I do, however, have a bit of an indignation hangover from yesterday

Next up cbc? *licks chops*

Anonymous said...

What kind of baseball blog is this does no one want to talk about baseball?

What is this sport called Hockey and how do Habs work, do they call travelling?

HabsFan29 said...

@Anon - every Montrealer is jaded about baseball. it's a touchy subject

With that said, the Sox starting pitching is killing them,. And fuck, they're making dumb plays in the field too. And they can't hit. It's a disaster

lawyergirl77 said...

@Anon - "Do they call travelling?"

+ andone. I'm still giggling.

Le Douze said...

@anon - in Mtl., "traveling" is what happened to the 'spos.

moeman said...

¡ ƃ ɥ ɟ ʎ ƃ

Melanie said...

Chester -
"not big readers, shall we say?" It's Boston, one of the more educated cities in the country, which I know you well know.
Nice try at..................
not sure who you were trying to fool with that one.

Anonymous said...

"Scott Gomez is travelling with the puck" at least since 12:56

Steve said...

Should anyone accuse me of being anon from(12:56 to 8:21). I will say with the same total honesty I said last night during the debate, "that is not the truth"

Steve said...

@Melanie said... Boston is one of the most educated cities in the USA, oh sweet mother of Jesus do not set one up on the golf tee like that again, or you might be responsible for an international incident, if we ever get a Canadian again as PM.

Moey said...

I would love it if the Rangers knocked out the Caps in the first round.

HabsFan29 said...

22 HOURS TIL PUCK DROP PEOPLE.

im so not ready

Steve said...

Kovy gets a gift from the Gods. Tits your next

Moey said...

@29,

Tell me about it. I'm a nervous wreck. The end is nigh. *takes another swig* Ahhh, nothing to worry about, we'll beat them in seven. *hysterical laughter* *takes another swig*

Steve said...

Your watching me debate, soverienty is not important so just fuck off and vote for my majority.

Number31 said...

I feel asleep during this Rags/Caps game. Go for TRIPLE OT guys! C'mon! Wouldn't that be (incredibly boring) awesome...

BOOM! Playoffs.

Anonymous said...

jealous...you have more seasons to hate then to cheer.