I Was Incredible! Feeledelfia 3, Mentreal 2

You kent alweys get wat you want, you kent always get wat you want, but if you try sometime….lalala. I lav thet song, reely fentestic museec.

Game at Bell Centre waz so baad for teem, but was joke for big clown Cari. Put your stupide red nose on your nose clown Cari! You pley like litel clown and kids laf at you and you are clown! Hole teem say to me, its ok the stupide clown pley better next time.

So we take aroplane to Feeladelfia. Stupide teem sing baxing song wen we land. You no baxers Mentreal Cenediens! You hackey guys! Hackey guys and clown guy, this is reel name of teem. Hello, I am Jaro. I pley for hackey guys and clown guy.

Now game stori. Big clown go to net. So crazy things heppen. I pley hapskatch in halls and when I cam back to bench I see only 3 filadelfia guys on ice. We are 5! I no wat heppen. Same thing in league in Parkesh when one pleyer pleying and he fall becase he skate no tied! Ha! He fall all the time. Wen he go beck to bench to tie skate, he make mistake and tie he skate to player next to him skate! Wen coach tell them to go pley they fall together on ice! So fanny!!! I think filadepihia pleyers do same thing on bench in 3 game. Stuck on bench on no cant move. Hahaha.

Mentreal so sad for filadelfia we tell feelaphia pleyers, its ok we no score on you, we pass pack until they come beck. So we pley with pack on all the ice for 2 minoutes. Pheeladelfeea pleyers untie skate laces and go beck on ice.

Then Mentreal tell golie Biron, its ok golie Biron, we have open net and you not in your position becase you fall, we wait for you to go beack in net and we shoot pack in your belly, its no fare to shoot pack if you not in your net golie Biron. If we can we also hit post for you to give you the time to bo beck to your best pasition. I hear Kepten Saku tell Biron this. Biron give him big hag. It look very man gay, like Tchecoslovaka Sunday opera.

In second period, I watch beeeautifoul blond woman behind coach Carboner all period. She make my penis go to my pads. I tell her I like her and leek the glass so mach. We probably get married soon. Then Cari soooo jelos of Jaro, he cry in net like baby clown and say “I want marry her, I want marri her!”. I laf so hard. You think beutifooul girl like this want fat guy like you? Cari you cat your hair you look like peecack. I call you Chanel 5 Cari always now! And you want girl? No way Channel 5, she is for me.

So Cari pley 20 meenutes of so crep hackey. Filadelphia have 1 shat in second period and score 3 gols! So in break, coch tell me Jaro, you pley period 3. I tell coch “ no, I have date with Virginia, blond girl behind the bench!” Cocah no understand and I have to pley. But she watch me so I pley good. I make so many saves! Two! Two saves!!!! Marri me Virginia!!!!!!

Teem try to fix Cari crep clown hackey but also no want to hurt Biron feelings so only make 2 gols. Mentreal want to be nice becase every fieldephia fan have oroange ts-hirt say “Cenediens”. Papa call me after geme and say “That was most incrredibel golie performance alltime in history of Chekoslovakia. Everbady is celebrating with big parade outside. You make two saves and give all children hope. They change name of street from Havel Street to Havel Boulevard . women hagging each other crying saying ‘did you see Jaro saves?’ Tomoarrow no work here, netional haliday”. Coach tell me that becase my 2 saves I probably ween Conn Smythe trophy. I think so too. Cari ween Clown Smythe trophy!!!

OK bye!