Tuesday, April 26, 2011
On the brink of a horrible, horrible death - Game 6 preview and open thread
Well this could be it. Not to be the Debbie Downer or anything (that's LG's job!), but Habs now face elimination. Sure, we went 5-1 in elimination games last year, but that was then and this is now and now is not then. The guillotine blade could slice tonight. The ax and the sky may be about to fall. The collapse may be upon us. The ice of the Bell Center could be riddled with necrotizing fasciitis. The long march to Bataan is almost over. The road to Baghdad is paved with blood. Etc., etc. Let's break the last taboo with a death-themed blog post. No one said this would be pretty.
Waiting on death row - 7 PM start from the Bell, where the Habs are 0-2 so far this series in case you didn't know. I don't wish death upon anyone, but if every member of the CBC broadcast crew could suffer some sort of accident in the off-season that is non-fatal yet prevents them from returning next year, I would be ok with that.
DIE BRUINS DIE doesn't have quite the same ring to it as DIE PHUCKTARDS DIE for some reason - thanks to CH-Cornelius for pointing us to the moderately amusing Days of Y'Orr.
"Our remedies oft in ourselves do lie, which we ascribe to heaven." (W. Shakespeare) - closest thing we have to heaven so far in the series is Squid with his 7 points. TFS of course as well, who really can't be blamed for much, especially after he really rocked Game 5. For the Bs, Bergeron, Marchand, Thomas and (gulp) Ryder.
"In the cold, cold ground" (T. Waits) - A Mexican CHicken is in the guillotine for a reason. I would say our team defense has been pretty suspect all series. For the Bs, Krejci and Lucic have only one point apiece in the series. Imagine if they had been playing well. That's a total jinx for tonight.
At least it's better than palliative care - Neither DDD nor CHeez Whiz skated this morning so don't expect them in the lineup. Swiss Mister II, save us! Bs pretty healthy.
Losing your head to the guillotine - The Bs have yet to really lose their head so far this series. Credit to Julien I guess? We need them to do something really fucking stupid to get them off their game.
A fate worse than death - Chris Lee is the ref tonight.
Post-game adult entertainment - Linking to a necrophilia site is beyond even me. Linking to a video entitled "Female zombies craving for sperm", however, is right up my alley (nsfw, obvs).
(Hopefully not for the last time) GYFHG!!11!!!!
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293 comments:
«Oldest ‹Older 201 – 293 of 293Nice to see the phlyers keeping up with their goon ways. What do you expect with such a classless captain who had his own dirty hit (again) last game.
@Steve: I don't know if that last comment was intentional, but it was awesome. Also, ICE CREAM!
PHucktards know they can get away with anything. Tried watching a minute of the BUF game but mcsplooges cumwad comments were totally disgusting. He's paid by NBC, who owns them and the PHucktards for the next 10 fucking years.
New shirt on sale at the Bell Centre: Habs survived the second period and all I got was this lousy t-shirt.
BUF down 3-0, they usually play really dirty when down, hope they maim a few PHucktards.
All pretense has been dropped. All the CBC guys tonight are saying "we" when talking about the Broons. Don Cherry I get but the random dude talking about the amazing Thomas save from last night says: "That's the only reason we're ahead."
Way to go *C*BC.
@Orangeman, yes intentional or maybe a stopped clock is right twice a day.
What you will not have to pay to read, If Montreal scores no more goals and Boston does as well, Montreal Wins, yeah fuck win Montreal
McLame: "The Bruins can breath easy here tonight". I guess he saw the memo from Bettman.
One shift at a time boys.
TFS™!
Oh good, my heart did almost return to regular. Thanks guys.
18:19
bob and co creaming themselves over the Bs start
Captian we have the power, engage the system
one more period of competence...svp!
you know the game is tense when we're 14 comments over ice cream and no one even mentions it
16:31
jebus Price Chocula, nail Gomez to the bench, he no play system, he no play offence, he no play defense, he no play
Palpitations, nausea, the shakes...
This game is fucking killing me.
15:16
I just gotta say, way to go Jaro 2.o
heh, heely says Habs need to cheat at faceoffs.
I need a drink. er, a tenth drink
ICE CREAM?! WHO CAN THINK ABOUT ICE CREAM AT A TIME LIKE THIS?! MY SATELITE JUST WENT DOWN!!!
14:02
We're gonna win. TFS is playing his heart out too well to let up.
Cowboy up time
Anon: SHUP UP! (nothing personal)
@29: See my 858pm comment. I never forget ice cream.
I loved how Gill stepped between PFK and that shit Marchand and said "fuck you you little prick - fuck off and go sit down!" - without even looking at him. Little shit! I love Gill
12:59
@o'man - i stand corrected. double meth in your ice cream
and seriously, shut up anon (nothing personal)
Premature Olé.
Good shift, Gomer. If he scores, I'll buy a lottery ticket.
@moeman: I never think it's premature. Only the hey hey hey goodbye song can be premature.
Tend to agree kc.
10:59
9:54
STFU! cold!
CHannibis system postive
Habs 23-10 on blocked shots.
SHUT UP MOLSON CENTRE CROWD! SHUT UP ANON! EVERYONE JUST SHUT UP! SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP!
/runs out of room flailing arms
Another hnic Bs player package. Sick fucks.
7:45
One more goal boys, it'll suck the life out of the B's.
cold "this looks good!" Fuck you you old fool.
6:20
"Bruins coming so hard." Not as hard as the HNIC motley crew.
The System never makes anybody feel good or secure.
Cold: "this is some kind of tension in Montreal"
right, cause your Bs are losing
@moe,
tic toc. tic toc. tic toc. It's like Chinese water torture, just let this period be over, my neck is killing me from tension.
Buffalo soldiers, did not know rasta, they were buffalo soldiers in the heart of America
5:02
3:59
bob cold "doesn't think so"
ITS BACK!! THIS IS A SIGN!
LET IT BLEED
WOW. a call for us at this point
/faints
Props to Gomez, he is playing like a a one million dollar player sometines
Okay, don't do anything stupid on this PP.
2:59
2:31
T F S ™
yikes
1:49
0:59
"can the bruins get one?" SHUT UP COLD
GAME 7 fuckers!
Told you we'd win.
FUCK YEAH
FUCK YOU hnic you sick bruin loving fucks.
GAME 7, HERE WE COME, BITCHES!
Thank you Jesus, Allah, Buddha, etc.
I never lost faith, not for a second.
Yeah Yeah Yeah game 7 fuckers
FUCK YES!!!!!
Car horns, women shreiking, men yelling, children laughing. I love downtown Montreal.
figured I'd better wait until the end of the game to post.
just in case
wasn't really watching the game either.
and it paid off
hahahha Lucic you pissant - you basically gave us that victory asshole. loved it
YEAH ANON! *high five*
All game long the TSN ticker said "Bruins lead series 4-3". Wishful thinking, assholes?
I am literally shaking and dizzy. Might be the tonsilitis, might be my unhealthy devotion to this team. Or a combination thereof.
*neck cracks* *circulation resumes* Sigh.
WV - kingumpo. I have no idea what to do with this but it's interesting.
Please bury these fuckers!
Well, that was pleasant. How in the world am I gonna be able to do this again tomorrow night?
GoHawks!
If we win the next game Boston is out, where else can you get this stuff/
Well Cornelius, all the pressure is on your fucking dickhead Bruins now.
Suck it Lucic you fucking shaved orangutan.
Dead. Seriously. Death by System.
I love Lars Eller because he actually tried to keep the puck away from his own end. And he popped his arm back into his shoulder. Clearly he's Martin Riggs' Danish counterpart.
*sings*
We're going to game 7 (oh!)
Back to the Garden, (oh!)
We're gonna lay a beating, (oh!)
In the city of chowdah and beans.
Fuck me its an ORANGE CRUSH
Q 4 U, at the end of tomorrow's game do you shake the shaved gorilla's hand?
@Moeman
Tough call, can I spit in it first?
I say yes.
I am so buying a lottery ticket for Wed, and to all a very fucking great good night
Awesome. It's thundering. I said the Hockey Gods would rumble.
Habs didn't let me down, now it's your turn, Hawks. Don't let me down, Chicago! And SHADDUP Ron.
AC is now claiming that the win is due to the fact that the OSM was there for the anthems.
something about all 3 times they were there were CH wins
and we think we're weird fans.....
whew
that's my entire monthly allowance of adrenalin used up in one game.
I truly hope the habs have more gas left in the tank for tomorrow night, cuz I'm drained.
Apparently my winning formula now involves watching only rds, absolutely no switching to hnic between periods, with nothing to eat or drink, and I now have a lucky toothpick.
I can breathe again - thanks to the DVR so I can watch the game in HD and mrs. soperman can record her shows.
So how many games does Loosestick get? Hah! As if!
Peaks and valleys.
Habs do it but PHucktards not eliminated *sigh*
GYMFHG! Die PHucktards Die!
TSN says "Dennis Seidenberg scored for Boston, which played more than half the game without ejected winger Milan Lucic but still outshot the Canadiens 32-27."
Yeah, 'cause Lucic was such a star for them.
The Canucks game was even more bananas than the Habs. I nearly saw an entire arena commit suicide.
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